To borrow or not to borrow...to lend or not to lend...

Do you borrow? Do you lend?

  • No, never

  • Yes, always

  • Depends on the bag

  • Depends on the person

  • Depends on the bag AND the person

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#137
No I wouldn't. I used to swap bags with my schoolmates/ relatives when I was young and didn't had a lot pleasant experiences. I treasure my bags too much and so do others. The situation will also be difficult if the bag comes back stained or damaged.
 
#138
Not to diminish your dilemma, but a co worker asked me if I could give her one of my Chanel bags! Dunno if she was joking or not, but I bet you, if I said yes, she would've taken my bag and ran! Really? Seriously???
 
#140
NOOOOOOOO. With that many "O"s...because that would resemble the horrified look on my face.

My rule for lending anything out - be it purses, books, DVDs, CDs, etc. - is only lend it out if you're ok with it coming back damaged or not coming back at all - and the person not paying for repairing/replacing it.

Also, you do not owe your co-worker anything except possibly a simple explanation along the lines of what other posters have said, and incorporating what you said to her as well: "No, I don't lend my purses out because I've had some bad experiences in the past regarding that. But let's go shopping to find you one!"

On a side note, one thing I've learned about carrying out expensive items is that some people who see you carrying them will try to take advantage of your finances and/or your possessions. I'm not saying that your co-worker was intending on doing that, but just be aware of that possibility. Women tend to feel guilty when denying a person a request (e.g. you felt bad when you denied your co-worker's request, even though IMO, and in the opinion of most posters in this thread AND most ordinary people, it's an outrageous request!), and people take advantage of that to try to get what they want.

Anyhow, I hope you continue to feel better about your response. I find gut reactions are generally the right ones - and in the end, you got to do what you feel comfortable with. Good for you for going with your gut!!! :)
 
#141
Glad you didn't lend her your bag...the situation would've been more awkward if you lent it to her and something happened to it. Don't feel bad as I would've done the same!
 
#142
I personally don't think its rude to say no. It's simply a question and your answer is simply your answer, especially since it's your personal property.

Just like most people in this forum, I've lent out many items in the past, from pens to sunglasses, sometimes jewelry, and have yet to get them back. So to simply protect myself from getting into situations that may run sour I just say no, as difficult as it may be.

However, if its an item that I don't mind getting back damaged or not at all then I guess its fine... but I don't think a designer handbag would ever fit under those circumstances ^_^''
 
#143
Just another side thought as well... It is possible that she also may not have understood how expensive and prized your bags are worth / mean to you? She might just think it was "any other bag" and that would have prompted her to ask? She did not realize how valuable they are to you?
 
#144
pandorabox said:
Just another side thought as well... It is possible that she also may not have understood how expensive and prized your bags are worth / mean to you? She might just think it was "any other bag" and that would have prompted her to ask? She did not realize how valuable they are to you?
Click to expand...

I was thinking this too, pandorabox. A lot of people don't know how valuable some bags can be (or how some of us are so protective over them!) so she may have considered it a small request & not meant to be forward.

OP, I don't think your answer was rude :smile1:
 
#146
i have never been put in that position with a co-worker however i have been in a similar kind of situation with one of my close friends... she wanted to exchange bags for the day and i told her "no way!" ... again she is a close friend so it was the end of that.

in your situation, i would have definitely said no too! i think it depends on the person who is asking... and what purse they are asking for!

my mom doesnt let me borrow her chanels... lol
 
#147
I think you handled the situation well. I would not have lent out my bag to a co-worker.

Your co-worker's chutzpah in asking you reminds me of my neighbor. We are not close AT ALL, but when she heard I was planning a (physician-attended) home birth for our third child, she asked if she could come. I was just so shocked, all I could do was chuckle uncomfortably.
 
#148
I have never been in that situation before, but my answer would be no. I rarely lend out my bags to anyone, except maybe my mom. I don't lend to friends so I definitely would not lend to a coworker.
 
#150
bambistyle said:
I personally don't think its rude to say no. It's simply a question and your answer is simply your answer, especially since it's your personal property.

Just like most people in this forum, I've lent out many items in the past, from pens to sunglasses, sometimes jewelry, and have yet to get them back. So to simply protect myself from getting into situations that may run sour I just say no, as difficult as it may be.

However, if its an item that I don't mind getting back damaged or not at all then I guess its fine... but I don't think a designer handbag would ever fit under those circumstances ^_^''
Click to expand...


I let myself be pressured into lending my wedding dress to a friend of a friend's daughter in law to be. I had to beg and plead to get it back, and when I did get it back, it was dirty and hadn't been drycleaned as I requested. Also, they did not return the fluffy petticoat for underneath.

Now, I do not lend stuff. Either I will give it away, or I will say no. I do not buy my own stuff so that I can share it with others.
 
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