Ladies...Any RUDE/CATTY/SNIDE/NASTY Remarks about your Birkins or ANY Hermès Purchase

[catsinthebag]

Unfortunately I think you are right...sad...because I enjoy nice things and have worked my butt off to be able to afford them. I don't have many friends around me that are in the same financial situation...so I am pretty careful about sharing information about new purchases...it's why I am on this forum a lot...it is to be able to share joy and excitement with others!!

And me, you have to have chameleon-like skills to blend in
Standing out is easy (for all manner of reasons) but sometimes this ability allows for a smoother ride !

Ehy, my situation is similar in that most of the people in my daily life either cannot afford luxury items or choose to spend their money other ways (I have one friend who has way more money than I do, who has a vacation home and travels extensively but constantly carries Kate Spade bags). Fortunately, most people I interact with have no idea what H is. But one day a few years ago, before I fell into the Orange pool, I carried my beat up, understated (I thought) Balenciaga bag to the place where I volunteer. Bag went directly into a locker, but another volunteer then proceeded to follow me around, loudly talking about how much she loved my "Balenchee-aga" bag and how I was so lucky to afford one because she had to save up. Every time I'd take a step back from her she'd walk right into my personal space, speaking more loudly than necessary the entire time. To this day, I don't know if she was truly complimenting my bag or being passive-aggressive. Fortunately, many people think she acts inappropriately in general so I don't think it created too much attention. But since then, I carry Longchamp when I go there. Point being, sometimes it is better to just blend in.

I'm lucky that my DH supports my love of H, but I don't expect the same from friends. That's why I love tPF so much!

 

[meowmix318]

Ehy, my situation is similar in that most of the people in my daily life either cannot afford luxury items or choose to spend their money other ways (I have one friend who has way more money than I do, who has a vacation home and travels extensively but constantly carries Kate Spade bags). Fortunately, most people I interact with have no idea what H is. But one day a few years ago, before I fell into the Orange pool, I carried my beat up, understated (I thought) Balenciaga bag to the place where I volunteer. Bag went directly into a locker, but another volunteer then proceeded to follow me around, loudly talking about how much she loved my "Balenchee-aga" bag and how I was so lucky to afford one because she had to save up. Every time I'd take a step back from her she'd walk right into my personal space, speaking more loudly than necessary the entire time. To this day, I don't know if she was truly complimenting my bag or being passive-aggressive. Fortunately, many people think she acts inappropriately in general so I don't think it created too much attention. But since then, I carry Longchamp when I go there. Point being, sometimes it is better to just blend in.

I'm lucky that my DH supports my love of H, but I don't expect the same from friends. That's why I love tPF so much!

Wow that is so rude. This person clearly has no manners. I really dislike it when people point out my nice expensive things more in a negative way than a positive one. When people start to ask me about how much I paid, it makes me uncomfortable. I only have one friend who does not make me feel bad for spending my money on luxuries.

But everyone else that have asked me has.

Just like you, I only carry certain bags in certain places to better blend in and not draw too much attention to myself. I only bring my 1 and only Kelly bag with me on evenings out to dinner (well nice dinners where we are dressed up) and shopping. But I wouldn't use that as a work purse (the ladies that I work with consider Coach a luxury brand. Although nothing wrong with Coach, I have 2 items from them and still use them in my bag rotation, I would just never bring it there. They would either point out the expensive bag (and then treat me differently in a bad way) or not even notice (because fashion brands are not on their rader)

I also would never bring my high end purses with me to travel with. I'm such a germ-a-phobe when it comes to the public. I am not a fan of TSA man handling my bags through airport security. I only bring my Longchamp bag with me when I travel (the reason why I bought this bag in the 1st place)

 

[VigeeLeBrun]

^^ Thank goodness that I have an orange addicted BFF and we can commiserate and congratulate each other about our H purchases. Aside from her and tPF I maintain a code of silence and am very careful where I carry my Bs/Ks now that I am out of NYC and in the lovely and quiet suburbs.

That is just the way it needs to be.

 

[LaFrenchLady]

I know this is not a funny fancy thread but I'ld really like to have your mind on it and perhaps if you'ld like to share your experience about it.
Last monday, I was walking in the streets of my city, Lille, (biggest city at the north of Paris, you've got every shop like LV, Hermès and so on) and a guy shouted insults at me because I was wearing my Kelly.

Now it is important to point out he directly insulted me focusing on my hypothetic wealth.
It is something people often do in France, and I have noticed it does not seem to be the case in other countries. That's because of the 1789 Revolution I guess.

Does it happen in your country ????
It was very rude, very schocking and I feel I was the easy target because I was the blond young girl wearing a skirt, alone with her (also blond) toddler, and there was this Kelly...

I know this is an expensive bag, and I often feel shame for liking expensive items. I've talked about it with some members. But eventhough I can understand the anger of the guy, I feel there was no need to insult me in front of my son, especially since this person does not know me personally.

Has it ever happened to you ?????

I work hard to educate my son, take care of my family everyday, and my husband is literaly killing himself at work. He earned that money.
Plus we do a lot for our local and global environment -I mean ecology-, and we donate a lot to charities and good will.

It's not like I had stolen it from an elderly lady.

 

[Yoshi1296]

I feel your pain. One guy shouted homophobic slurs at me for carrying a Celine Phantom tote on the subway once. I live in NYC. I'm sure things like this happen a lot.

In your case I wouldn't worry about him. Just some crazy a**hole on the street with nothing better to do. You haven't done anything wrong so there is no need to feel upset or guilty over having your Kelly. You and your husband work hard for yourselves and for your child too. Which is a great thing.

Enjoy your wonderful Kelly and keep working hard for your toddler. So far you are on the right track! [emoji173]️

 

[periogirl28]

Wow I have never had this abuse ever and def not when in France. I don't think you need to feel guilty as you came by this bag honestly, with hard work and you do live your life with unselfish actions. That Revolution was 227 years ago and he can go out and do something for himself without shouting at random strangers. The problem is 100% with him and not you.

 

[Rouge H]

There is a ignore button for every set of circumstances, that's the button I push.
No one deserves to be verbally abused, I'm sorry you had to go through that.

 

[NikkisABagGirl]

This is truly concerning. I am so sorry this happened to you. Nothing like this has ever happened to me, I don't know what I would do or say. I would probably be so embarrassed. It is absolutely not okay for someone to do something like this to you in front of your young child that doesn't understand this type of aggression. I would just ignore! and enjoy what your family has worked so hard for.

 

[millivanilli]

I know this is not a funny fancy thread but I'ld really like to have your mind on it and perhaps if you'ld like to share your experience about it.
Last monday, I was walking in the streets of my city, Lille, (biggest city at the north of Paris, you've got every shop like LV, Hermès and so on) and a guy shouted insults at me because I was wearing my Kelly.

Now it is important to point out he directly insulted me focusing on my hypothetic wealth.
It is something people often do in France, and I have noticed it does not seem to be the case in other countries. That's because of the 1789 Revolution I guess.

Does it happen in your country ????
It was very rude, very schocking and I feel I was the easy target because I was the blond young girl wearing a skirt, alone with her (also blond) toddler, and there was this Kelly...

I know this is an expensive bag, and I often feel shame for liking expensive items. I've talked about it with some members. But eventhough I can understand the anger of the guy, I feel there was no need to insult me in front of my son, especially since this person does not know me personally.

Has it ever happened to you ?????

I work hard to educate my son, take care of my family everyday, and my husband is literaly killing himself at work. He earned that money.
Plus we do a lot for our local and global environment -I mean ecology-, and we donate a lot to charities and good will.

It's not like I had stolen it from an elderly lady.

Beeing European as well and living in a country that is master in success-shaming /bashing here are my answers:

First, I am really sorry that this happened to you, worse with you son hearing that. Don't let that memory stick on you Kelly, please. I know how those experiences have the tendency to stick to the item that created the experience.

Does it happen in your country ????

Yes! Totally! You would wonder how often. Over here people tend to target their victims they can blame for showing their (assumed) wealth activly.

Has it ever happened to you ?????

Yes. See my "train"episode over here. It was devastating even if I did not know any of them. I mean I do not want to be judged in ANY way, neither people feeling envy nor hate for the things I have.

It's not like I had stolen it from an elderly lady.

I know what you mean. At the train I was so sad to be judged in that way as nobody knows how I earned my Birkin- it is not written on my head. Earlier days I was so miserable about a few things that I cried literally every day. At some point I decided " crying costs 10 Euros". Did not stop my from crying but I collected the amount for my B pretty fast. After escaping that situation that made my cry day for day I went to Paris and brought home the Birkin. Nobody knows that, looking at me. They'll see (if they recognize) a Birkin. They won't see that I paid for it with my tears, my grief and the darkest hours of my life.

So, let me give you a hug, then perhaps look up a few french cruses and I'll head over to Lille and find that guy. I am quite good a lecturing...

 

[papertiger]

I know this is not a funny fancy thread but I'ld really like to have your mind on it and perhaps if you'ld like to share your experience about it.
Last monday, I was walking in the streets of my city, Lille, (biggest city at the north of Paris, you've got every shop like LV, Hermès and so on) and a guy shouted insults at me because I was wearing my Kelly.

Now it is important to point out he directly insulted me focusing on my hypothetic wealth.
It is something people often do in France, and I have noticed it does not seem to be the case in other countries. That's because of the 1789 Revolution I guess.

Does it happen in your country ????
It was very rude, very schocking and I feel I was the easy target because I was the blond young girl wearing a skirt, alone with her (also blond) toddler, and there was this Kelly...

I know this is an expensive bag, and I often feel shame for liking expensive items. I've talked about it with some members. But eventhough I can understand the anger of the guy, I feel there was no need to insult me in front of my son, especially since this person does not know me personally.

Has it ever happened to you ?????

I work hard to educate my son, take care of my family everyday, and my husband is literaly killing himself at work. He earned that money.
Plus we do a lot for our local and global environment -I mean ecology-, and we donate a lot to charities and good will.

It's not like I had stolen it from an elderly lady.

You have my sympathy. As @Yoshi1296 said, try not to take to heart that person's words and double-think your life. Spending on an H bag or money in the bank, it is no concern of anybody else's what you choose to do with your finances and makes no difference to anybody else, least of all a deranged stranger.

My guess is that the man has a illogical hatred of most people and you just happened to be in his sights at that particular place and time.

 

[SandySummer]

I don't have anyone who is openly nasty or catty about my H items. However, my excitement for newly acquired items have been misinterpreted as "bragging" and "showing off" [emoji53]

 

[millivanilli]

I don't have anyone who is openly nasty or catty about my H items. However, my excitement for newly acquired items have been misinterpreted as "bragging" and "showing off" [emoji53]

well, when it comes to your SO Birkin on your avatar, feel totally free to show them off to me )

 

[QuelleFromage]

I think this is common in every country, unfortunately. It is more likely for Hermès to be recognized in Europe. In the US you can get yelled at for carrying any name bag but I've never had someone random recognize a Kelly like that (a Birkin, yes).
These are just angry people taking out their troubles on someone unrelated. Right now in the world we have a lot of anger and a lot of rhetoric about "haves" and "have nots" , which I am sure inflames some of this behavior.
Please don't feel you have to defend your life and choices - it is no one's business but your own.

 

[catsinthebag]

Beeing European as well and living in a country that is master in success-shaming /bashing here are my answers:

First, I am really sorry that this happened to you, worse with you son hearing that. Don't let that memory stick on you Kelly, please. I know how those experiences have the tendency to stick to the item that created the experience.

Does it happen in your country ????

Yes! Totally! You would wonder how often. Over here people tend to target their victims they can blame for showing their (assumed) wealth activly.

Has it ever happened to you ?????

Yes. See my "train"episode over here. It was devastating even if I did not know any of them. I mean I do not want to be judged in ANY way, neither people feeling envy nor hate for the things I have.

It's not like I had stolen it from an elderly lady.

I know what you mean. At the train I was so sad to be judged in that way as nobody knows how I earned my Birkin- it is not written on my head. Earlier days I was so miserable about a few things that I cried literally every day. At some point I decided " crying costs 10 Euros". Did not stop my from crying but I collected the amount for my B pretty fast. After escaping that situation that made my cry day for day I went to Paris and brought home the Birkin. Nobody knows that, looking at me. They'll see (if they recognize) a Birkin. They won't see that I paid for it with my tears, my grief and the darkest hours of my life.

So, let me give you a hug, then perhaps look up a few french cruses and I'll head over to Lille and find that guy. I am quite good a lecturing...

I love this post. This is the kind of support we all need in life, and one of the reasons tPF is my favorite cyber place to go. Thanks for this.

 

[lulilu]

You responded in a very polished manner. Mine would have been a knee-jerk profanity (NYC influence lol).