Ladies...Any RUDE/CATTY/SNIDE/NASTY Remarks about your Birkins or ANY Hermès Purchase

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Great points! :tup:

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Honestly the people commenting and making snarky comments should be frowned upon- not the girl who carries a birkin. Those people are being opinionated about something that has nothing to do with them- whether it's because they're jealous, gossipy, or whatever, they should stop worrying about how much a birkin costs and start worrying about themselves.

I don't care if someone works hard for their bag or not. I didn't pay for it, so I don't care. She could be a hooker, and I still wouldn't judge her for it. If it's indeed her mom's bag, I still don't care and would not think less of her just because she didn't buy it with her own hard earned money. I think if other people could be a bit more empathetic and imagine if they're in her shoes, I bet they wouldn't be turning away nice things either, so why judge?

For reference, I often times carried a Coach tote or a LV Alma in college- most of the time I didn't need a backpack because I didn't have much to carry for long periods of time- it's not like high school. I rarely ever needed to carry multiple textbooks to school, and I used 1 spiral notebook for basically all of my classes. Now a days, I bet more students are just bringing their laptop or tablet anyways. A birkin's size could be sufficient.

Absolutely!! :smile1:

People have a right to wear whatever accessories they like in peace. If the critical, petty, envious individuals would take time to meet and get to know the targets of their venom, they might learn something.

So true!! :p

I must respectfully disagree. I worked while in school and did pay for my own luxury goods, including Birkins. There are certainly students who pay for or contribute to their education, myself included. Some schools are as much as $50k a year in tuition alone so I don't know why it would be unimaginable that a student could save up and afford an expensive handbag, especially if it is pre-owned.

In college, I rarely needed more than a notebook and tablet or small laptop so a large Birkin or another tote generally met my needs. I lived off campus so I parked near class and never had far to walk. My bags were always with me and never unattended

Birkins were far more under the radar than mid-range designer bags or the LV bags that many people carried. I really enjoyed my well made bags and wanted to get as much use out of them as possible. None of my friends were concerned with what I carried and would just warn me if we were going somewhere I shouldn't wear one of "those bags."

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I agree with you that there is a time and a place for everything. If you spend most of your time at school or work, it may significantly limit the wearability of expensive items. I personally feel more comfortable wearing expensive things to a place I am paying to attend (school) than a place I am being paid to attend (work). Ultimately, it's all a matter of personal opinion and comfort level.

There is so much more to all of us... than what we wear!! :tup:

McLoverly, Madam Bijoux, and Stephc005 I completely agree with all of you. There really is no reason to judge another person for what they choose to wear or what bag they're carrying; whether or not they bought it themselves is irrelevant. I understand that clothing and accessories represent the individual, but there is so much more to a person than what they wear. It's sad to think that someone could completely miss out on knowing a potentially awesome person because of what they thought of their outfit...
 
I think the image of a college student with a backpack loaded with textbooks and notebooks is becoming increasingly outdated. With the exception of law school (a friend of mine who recently graduated used to lament the amount of stuff she had to carry -- she literally almost got a suitcase with wheels to lug it all!), many students go to class with a tablet and maybe a notebook.

I live not far from Harvard University (and in an area that is an educational Mecca), and I see students carrying everything from backpacks to Longchamp le Pliages to LV and Chanel. Who cares if they earned the money for those bags or if they were gifts from wealthy family? I just hope they get a good education and try to do something good in the world.

The only way I will judge someone for the bag they carry is if:

1) They stole it, or

2) if they think the bag they carry somehow makes them better than the people around them.
 
I’ve been dressing a bit ”out there” during periods of my life, and if you do that you are going to get reactions; some of them positive, some of them negative. You either deal with it or conform. To conform is obviously the easier alternative, but it might not make you happier in the long run. How we dress and accessorize is a way to portray how we see ourselves and how we want to be perceived, and I personally don’t want to censor this form of self-expression.

It’s debatable how important an Hermès bag is as a way to express yourself, but if you want to carry Hermès you’d better be prepared to accept that people will form some sort of opinion about you based on that. They will also judge you if you carry Gucci or H&M. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. My motto is "live and let live". In my experience, people don't really care if a nice person is wearing designer everything, but they are quick to label a rude person wearing the same things a nasty snob.

How others react to your appearance might say more about them than about you, and how you expect others to react might say more about you than about them.
 
I’ve been dressing a bit ”out there” during periods of my life, and if you do that you are going to get reactions; some of them positive, some of them negative. You either deal with it or conform. To conform is obviously the easier alternative, but it might not make you happier in the long run. How we dress and accessorize is a way to portray how we see ourselves and how we want to be perceived, and I personally don’t want to censor this form of self-expression.

It’s debatable how important an Hermès bag is as a way to express yourself, but if you want to carry Hermès you’d better be prepared to accept that people will form some sort of opinion about you based on that. They will also judge you if you carry Gucci or H&M. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. My motto is "live and let live". In my experience, people don't really care if a nice person is wearing designer everything, but they are quick to label a rude person wearing the same things a nasty snob.

How others react to your appearance might say more about them than about you, and how you expect others to react might say more about you than about them.

GREAT post. Really well-said.
 
I’ve been dressing a bit ”out there” during periods of my life, and if you do that you are going to get reactions; some of them positive, some of them negative. You either deal with it or conform. To conform is obviously the easier alternative, but it might not make you happier in the long run. How we dress and accessorize is a way to portray how we see ourselves and how we want to be perceived, and I personally don’t want to censor this form of self-expression.

It’s debatable how important an Hermès bag is as a way to express yourself, but if you want to carry Hermès you’d better be prepared to accept that people will form some sort of opinion about you based on that. They will also judge you if you carry Gucci or H&M. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. My motto is "live and let live". In my experience, people don't really care if a nice person is wearing designer everything, but they are quick to label a rude person wearing the same things a nasty snob.

How others react to your appearance might say more about them than about you, and how you expect others to react might say more about you than about them.

Love this! Absolutely true.
 
I’ve been dressing a bit ”out there” during periods of my life, and if you do that you are going to get reactions; some of them positive, some of them negative. You either deal with it or conform. To conform is obviously the easier alternative, but it might not make you happier in the long run. How we dress and accessorize is a way to portray how we see ourselves and how we want to be perceived, and I personally don’t want to censor this form of self-expression.

It’s debatable how important an Hermès bag is as a way to express yourself, but if you want to carry Hermès you’d better be prepared to accept that people will form some sort of opinion about you based on that. They will also judge you if you carry Gucci or H&M. You’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t. My motto is "live and let live". In my experience, people don't really care if a nice person is wearing designer everything, but they are quick to label a rude person wearing the same things a nasty snob.

How others react to your appearance might say more about them than about you, and how you expect others to react might say more about you than about them.
Great post ...and so true!
 
I think the problem arises with the 20 seconds in which we have to make a first appearance. Obviously, if we know and care about someone, we couldn't care less if they are wearing Dior Couture or are dressed out of a Goodwill dumpster. The problem is that the first impression may be the only one we get to make.

It's not fair and yes, it is shallow and superficial but it is so, nonetheless. There certainly are phases in ones life when we couldn't care less what anything thinks about us - we are who we are and are comfortable with that. At seventy, that is my phase of life. All I want people to think is that I'm well-groomed and have made some effort to look decent, beyond that, they may think as they may.

But when one is in college and trying to make connections and friends on a campus where one might not know a single person when they arrive, or in a job interview - even the job itself in our early years establishing our reputation - then it can put a huge distance between us and potential friends who may be turned off by how we look, be it a "grunge look" or Hermes.

We can't put people off to the point they never find out that we're really a very nice person.
 
Well, it’s hard to please everyone all of the time. ;-)

Realistically speaking, I don’t think that we can or should ignore the impact our appearances might have. Sometimes we do need to adapt a bit. There are reasons why we should follow dress codes, like wearing black (or at least something dark and somber) at a funeral. I wouldn’t suggest that a police or fire fighter alter or abandon their uniform since it’s vital that we can identify their professional roles. If we are employees there may be dress codes to follow at work, and it would certainly be a good idea to look presentable at a job interview. What we do in our spare time is up to us though.

Looking at the bigger picture, we generally tend to be a lot less individualistic than we think we are. People have an innate need to belong, to fit in, and one of the ways we do this is by adopting a more or less formulaic look that shows where we belong. This might be anything from a very small group (like haute couture clients) to a very large group (like fotball fans). Those haute couture clients probably recognize and gravitate to each other. The rebellious teen misfits blend right in with all the other teen misfits. The artsy type probably has an affinity to other artsy types, the soccer mom hangs out with other soccer moms, and so on. Of course people from different groups mix, but they will tend to feel at home with those similar to them. We don't often go out of our way to befriend people that are very different from us, or apply for a job at a company with dress codes or ethics we can't live with.

But anyway, I don’t have much respect for anyone that writes off people based only on appearance. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt – I make a crude assessment of a person based on their looks, but withhold judgement until I actually interact with them.
 
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Well, it’s hard to please everyone all of the time. ;-)

Realistically speaking, I don’t think that we can or should ignore the impact our appearances might have. Sometimes we do need to adapt a bit. There are reasons why we should follow dress codes, like wearing black (or at least something dark and somber) at a funeral. I wouldn’t suggest that a police or fire fighter alter or abandon their uniform since it’s vital that we can identify their professional roles. If we are employees there may be dress codes to follow at work, and it would certainly be a good idea to look presentable at a job interview. What we do in our spare time is up to us though.

Looking at the bigger picture, we generally tend to be a lot less individualistic than we think we are. People have an innate need to belong, to fit in, and one of the ways we do this is by adopting a more or less formulaic look that shows where we belong. This might be anything from a very small group (like haute couture clients) to a very large group (like fotball fans). Those haute couture clients probably recognize and gravitate to each other. The rebellious teen misfits blend right in with all the other teen misfits. The artsy type probably has an affinity to other artsy types, the soccer mom hangs out with other soccer moms, and so on. Of course people from different groups mix, but they will tend to feel at home with those similar to them. We don't often go out of our way to befriend people that are very different from us, or apply for a job at a company with dress codes or ethics we can't live with.

But anyway, I don’t have much respect for anyone that writes off people based only on appearance. I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt – I make a crude assessment of a person based on their looks, but withhold judgement until I actually interact with them.

Such a great point and one I try my best to do as well!:flowers:
 
The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!


first of all, not everyone in college is 17 years old. You also don't know someones working conditions. Who knows if they really have worked hard to get themselves a firkin bag. We don't know people life situations. Secondly its a handbag. Nobody should give a crap about what handbag someone is carrying. I never use a backpack. I carried a handbag in high school and college and carried the books I needed for the class I was attending, no one said she was walking about with a firkin and a backpack. As for making friends I think its ridiculous that you would recommend not using the things you have so that you can make friends. My parents where wealthy and I carried designer things and drove a nice car, I had plenty of friends from all financial brackets. Nobody cared about my things, they were my friends because I was a good friend and a fun person. Thats all that should matter. If someone is going to speak poorly of you because of what you have you don't need them as a friend in the first place. Chances are they will talk about you regardless, whether you're carrying a firkin or a coach outlet bag. Being a fashionable student or having nice things also has absolutely nothing to do with academic performance either. You can stand out in the classroom and in life, its not one or the other.
 
I must respectfully disagree. I worked while in school and did pay for my own luxury goods, including Birkins. There are certainly students who pay for or contribute to their education, myself included. Some schools are as much as $50k a year in tuition alone so I don't know why it would be unimaginable that a student could save up and afford an expensive handbag, especially if it is pre-owned.

In college, I rarely needed more than a notebook and tablet or small laptop so a large Birkin or another tote generally met my needs. I lived off campus so I parked near class and never had far to walk. My bags were always with me and never unattended

Birkins were far more under the radar than mid-range designer bags or the LV bags that many people carried. I really enjoyed my well made bags and wanted to get as much use out of them as possible. None of my friends were concerned with what I carried and would just warn me if we were going somewhere I shouldn't wear one of "those bags."

It's now that I'm out of school that I find it more inappropriate to wear my Birkins. I feel that Hermes has become more recognizable in recent years and that makes me uncomfortable. I also feel like wearing a Birkin at work is inappropriate. If you're making more than others, no need to flaunt it. If you're not making what you want, it's harder to ask for a raise if you're carrying a Birkin. I make more money now than I did in college, but I rarely have occasion to wear my Hermes bags and have started buying less expensive bags. My hermes bags don't fit enough for my office needs and I leave my desk unattended quite often so I don't know that I would want to leave such a valuable belonging in the office even if it seemed appropriate.

I agree with you that there is a time and a place for everything. If you spend most of your time at school or work, it may significantly limit the wearability of expensive items. I personally feel more comfortable wearing expensive things to a place I am paying to attend (school) than a place I am being paid to attend (work). Ultimately, it's all a matter of personal opinion and comfort level.

100% agree!
 
I think the problem arises with the 20 seconds in which we have to make a first appearance. Obviously, if we know and care about someone, we couldn't care less if they are wearing Dior Couture or are dressed out of a Goodwill dumpster. The problem is that the first impression may be the only one we get to make.

It's not fair and yes, it is shallow and superficial but it is so, nonetheless. There certainly are phases in ones life when we couldn't care less what anything thinks about us - we are who we are and are comfortable with that. At seventy, that is my phase of life. All I want people to think is that I'm well-groomed and have made some effort to look decent, beyond that, they may think as they may.

But when one is in college and trying to make connections and friends on a campus where one might not know a single person when they arrive, or in a job interview - even the job itself in our early years establishing our reputation - then it can put a huge distance between us and potential friends who may be turned off by how we look, be it a "grunge look" or Hermes.

We can't put people off to the point they never find out that we're really a very nice person.




It depends on where you go to school. I went to college head to toe Chanel and exotic birkins, I was far from the only one.. rather quite normal. The most modest girls at my school carried Prada. Lots of kids drove Mercedez, BMW etc.
 
I watched an interesting example of nasty remarks because of a Birkin yesterday!

I was shopping in Chanel and there were these two ladies literally brandishing their Birkin's and Kelly's and shopping quite noisily when this other lady came up the stairs and an SA rushed towards her. She said hello to the first two ladies and disappeared into a fitting room. The minute she disappeared, omg the first two interrupted their shopping to gossip about how the third one was so spoilt, such a snob, so boring, how she had x many bags and more... in 5 minutes I overheard the cattiest things ever, and yet they had beamed with smiles when the lady had said hello to them!

The lady in the fitting room came back out, waved goodbye and left. I think the first two had a bad case of bag envy as lady 3 was carrying a black croc Birkin 30, incredibly chic in a simply styled way. I was so curious that I asked my SA who she was, and my SA said "oh one of our best customers, very sweet and quiet lady"

So yes, what people say about others reveals so much more about themselves than the people they are talking about, I'd have hated to be a friend of the loud shopping duo!
 
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