Ladies...Any RUDE/CATTY/SNIDE/NASTY Remarks about your Birkins or ANY Hermès Purchase

[newmommy_va]

Ugh. I can relate.

Nevertheless... read any number of Birkin-related articles/posts/etc. on various popular media sites, and you'll find the same predictable commentary: mean-spirited, narrow-minded, and inflammatory. And although we may not hear strangers utter comments along this vein, to us, irl... people do think this way. :ninja:

While it's tempting to respond to such commentaries, by justifing our Birkins to ourselves and to strangers... the truth is that the latter, is usually an exercise in futility, for there will always be those for whom the detest of the Birkin will remain unswerving (there are quite a few of them, here on tpf, too). Meanwhile... how we justify the Birkin (or any designer expense) to ourselves... is a private, personal matter. Because even here in the Hermes forum, there are those who read personal justifications that have been posted... and judge unkindly, too.

Ultimately... we're entitled to our thoughts and beliefs, and commentators are entitled to theirs. C'est la vie.

I hope no one minds me bumping this thread, but I have a story to share...

There is a girl who I often seen around campus that is always carrying a Birkin (I've seen a red and a black on her so far). I'm guessing other people have noticed too, because even for the students of "upper class" backgrounds from well-off families, a Birkin is not something that is gifted the same way an LV or even a Chanel bag would be. A while ago there was a comment posted on the Facebook group saying "To the girl who's always carrying a birkin, we all know it's yours Mom's, no need to feel all high and mighty" (this wasn't the exact wording, but the message had roughly the same meaning).

I thought it was kind of uncalled for, because every time I've seen her, she seems like a genuinely nice person, always smiling, carefree, doesn't take herself too seriously type of girl, but also someone who definitely dresses well and appreciates fashion. Obviously, I don't know her, but even so, I thought it was pretty mean-spirited to call her our on a school-wide Facebook page like that.

The comments underneath it were all along the lines of "oh I googled birkin, who's crazy enough to spend $15k on a bag?? How stupid", all being pretty harsh and critical.

It's situations like these that make me uncomfortable bringing out any sort of designer goods, for fear of being called out as superficial and snobby. And some of these people criticizing her are people who have no trouble spending thousands on tech without blinking an eye, or taking exotic vacations in luxury hotels! I just don't get it

 

[India]

Honestly, who cares? Thats the attitude you should have when it comes to what other people think about you. Whether you've worked extremely hard for your luxury goods or they were gifted to you, you still deserve to use and enjoy them in peace. If other people want to talk crap about that, its because they are jealous. You shouldn't stop yourself from enjoying your things or anything else in life to appease someones insecurities.

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

 

[chicinthecity777]

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

Words of wisdom!

 

[afsweet]

Realistically, we're all getting judged for what we wear/carry, where we live, what we drive, where we work, etc. Whether it's right or wrong, it's just a part of life. I don't think this girl should be judged because she carries an expensive bag- but then again, when you put yourself out there, you have to be willing to take the good and the bad comments. If I roll out of bed looking like a hobo, of course it's not nice for someone to say something, but hey what do I expect? If she doesn't want to be judged as being snobby or rich (whether or not she is or isn't), leave the controversial stuff at home.


Honestly the people commenting and making snarky comments should be frowned upon- not the girl who carries a birkin. Those people are being opinionated about something that has nothing to do with them- whether it's because they're jealous, gossipy, or whatever, they should stop worrying about how much a birkin costs and start worrying about themselves.


I don't care if someone works hard for their bag or not. I didn't pay for it, so I don't care. She could be a hooker, and I still wouldn't judge her for it. If it's indeed her mom's bag, I still don't care and would not think less of her just because she didn't buy it with her own hard earned money. I think if other people could be a bit more empathetic and imagine if they're in her shoes, I bet they wouldn't be turning away nice things either, so why judge?


For reference, I often times carried a Coach tote or a LV Alma in college- most of the time I didn't need a backpack because I didn't have much to carry for long periods of time- it's not like high school. I rarely ever needed to carry multiple textbooks to school, and I used 1 spiral notebook for basically all of my classes. Now a days, I bet more students are just bringing their laptop or tablet anyways. A birkin's size could be sufficient.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

People have a right to wear whatever accessories they like in peace. If the critical, petty, envious individuals would take time to meet and get to know the targets of their venom, they might learn something.

 

[ladysarah]

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

I agree with you India- however in London universities there seems to a lot of Asian students carrying birkins and other hermes bags. These girls (and sometimes boys) are a lot younger than me and as you say there is no way they worked and earned their own money. It does seem to be a culture thing though so it doesn't bother me and would most certainly never make a nasty comment to them. I do think its a shame though - they don't relax a little and need all those expensive things to accompany them to class. When I was a student, (which wasn't that long ago) our main interests was travelling, gap years and meeting delectable chaps... if you had a mulberry bag you left it at home with your parents - you did not carry it in class.

 

[GenieBottle26]

people have a right to wear whatever accessories they like in peace. If the critical, petty, envious individuals would take time to meet and get to know the targets of their venom, they might learn something.

amen sistah!!

 

[panthere55]

People have a right to wear whatever accessories they like in peace. If the critical, petty, envious individuals would take time to meet and get to know the targets of their venom, they might learn something.

Well said!

 

[L.Vuitton.Freak]

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

Totally agree with you! +1 or should I say +100

 

[McLoverly]

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

I must respectfully disagree. I worked while in school and did pay for my own luxury goods, including Birkins. There are certainly students who pay for or contribute to their education, myself included. Some schools are as much as $50k a year in tuition alone so I don't know why it would be unimaginable that a student could save up and afford an expensive handbag, especially if it is pre-owned.

In college, I rarely needed more than a notebook and tablet or small laptop so a large Birkin or another tote generally met my needs. I lived off campus so I parked near class and never had far to walk. My bags were always with me and never unattended

Birkins were far more under the radar than mid-range designer bags or the LV bags that many people carried. I really enjoyed my well made bags and wanted to get as much use out of them as possible. None of my friends were concerned with what I carried and would just warn me if we were going somewhere I shouldn't wear one of "those bags."

It's now that I'm out of school that I find it more inappropriate to wear my Birkins. I feel that Hermes has become more recognizable in recent years and that makes me uncomfortable. I also feel like wearing a Birkin at work is inappropriate. If you're making more than others, no need to flaunt it. If you're not making what you want, it's harder to ask for a raise if you're carrying a Birkin. I make more money now than I did in college, but I rarely have occasion to wear my Hermes bags and have started buying less expensive bags. My hermes bags don't fit enough for my office needs and I leave my desk unattended quite often so I don't know that I would want to leave such a valuable belonging in the office even if it seemed appropriate.

I agree with you that there is a time and a place for everything. If you spend most of your time at school or work, it may significantly limit the wearability of expensive items. I personally feel more comfortable wearing expensive things to a place I am paying to attend (school) than a place I am being paid to attend (work). Ultimately, it's all a matter of personal opinion and comfort level.

 

[BritAbroad]

on one hand, i would have loved to have seen their faces if you responded with some snippy response that it was real! but the more mature thing to do was ignore it like you did. when people are being critical of you or your style, they take pleasure in seeing that it affects you, that it gets a rise out of you. i frequently hear SA's in department stores talking about me as i walk by, about my hair, my boots, my bags, etc, all rude things, and just to add insult, whenever i see them, i go out of my way to smile and look happy. just so they know they have had zero affect on me! so i can definitely relate to the feeling hurt part, i just try to hide it

Hun, you are a beautiful person! These people who critique and gossip are of no significance to you, they don't know you.
Same for everyone here who is critiqued by strangers in such a petty manner... I always say, consider the source.
The only words that matter are the ones you say to yourself

 

[MissNataliie]

McLoverly, Madam Bijoux, and Stephc005 I completely agree with all of you. There really is no reason to judge another person for what they choose to wear or what bag they're carrying; whether or not they bought it themselves is irrelevant. I understand that clothing and accessories represent the individual, but there is so much more to a person than what they wear. It's sad to think that someone could completely miss out on knowing a potentially awesome person because of what they thought of their outfit. El94, thank you for sharing your story! I hope that your classmate can look past all the silly comments and just do what makes her happy. If she wants to carry her Birkin around university, then she absolutely should!

 

[tulipfield]

Re: the college girl carrying a Birkin~ I mean, I think the great thing about well-made bags is that can be used again and again and age well. If she's just saving it for special occasions, then it's really a waste of money.

Also, if she really has a lovely personality, then I think the bag she carries should be no barrier to making friends. Who wants to befriend someone who judges you by your bag, anyway? By this logic we should be berating anybody who carries their possessions in a burlap sack.

 

[el94]

You ladies all make excellent points, I couldn't have said it better myself! McLoverly, you make a very good point! I see LV and Chanel quite frequently on campus but I've never seen anyone make a fuss, even though those bags can easily retail in the thousands as well.

The girl in my story carries her Birkin very well, and I think genuinely loves the bag and wants to get a much use out of it as possible (I often see it turned inwards so the logo and more recognizable "Birkin" characteristics are hidden, something that to me says she doesn't want to show it off to the whole world). It's definitely a piece she can get tons of use from!

I personally have a friend who is just as bag and shoe addicted as me, so I've very lucky to have someone who shares (and often fuels!) my addiction for pricier pieces Even though not everyone in our group of friends shares our love, they have never judged or criticized us for it, just jokingly roll their eyes slightly every time we fawn over our latest obsession :lolots:

 

[CanadianGal]

The chance that a college girl has "worked hard" to buy two Birkins, is highly unlikely - they are either hand-me-downs from her mother or a gift from a very wealthy parent.

I do not know of a college campus in the US where carrying a Birkin would be appropriate. I could care less if this girl owns one (or a dozen!), but it does not belong on campus for innumerable reasons.

First of all, it's just plain impractical. Most college students carry backpacks loaded with books and use that as their handbag as well. Frankly, I think a Birkin and a backpack being carried by the same person, looks ridiculous. Also, one is outdoors walking between classes and the dorm. Unless one lives where there is no rain or foul weather, that bag is going to take a beating.

Secondly, if one wants to fit in and make friends, one does not do things that put barriers between them and others. If this girl worn torn bluejeans and carried a dirty backpack, but was driven to school each day by a driver in a Rolls Royce, this would be a BIG barrier. The same is true of carrying a Birkin to class. What is the message she is sending? It says, "I'm stinking rich" and that is never really appropriate.

I don't mean that no one should carry luxury goods or wear good jewelry, but there is a time and place for everything. Carrying a $15,000 handbag when volunteering at a homeless shelter would certainly not be appropriate, but carrying one to a charity luncheon/fashion show might well be.

I don't much like the idea of that Facebook page - just a place for a lot of catty gossip. But this girl is setting herself up to be gossiped about by carrying a Birkin just as she would if she wore a sable jacket in the winter.

The only way one should strive to stand out from the crowd in college is in the classroom!!!!

I agree 100%.