2020 resolution - shopping my own bag and wallet collection. Any one else?

[piperdog]

Thank you all for the outpouring of support and kind thoughts. I can't express how much such things help. Tpf is a great diversion when it is all too much. It was sad, but tempered by the fact that my mom had a great life, she didn't suffer for long, I had a few days with her at the end, and now she's at peace. I love Gabs' idea of care packages for her mom, and will try to be as thoughtful of a friend/sister/auntie/whatever going forward.

 

[Rhl2987]

A lot you had New Year's resolutions or commitments in areas other than shopping. How are you doing with those now that we are halfway through January?

My two biggest commitments this year, outside of shopping, have been to spend more time outside and also to build relationships and a larger community where I live. I spent the first week in January outside every day for at least an hour, in Colorado in the middle of winter. I got sick from this and have spent over a week not getting outside at all! Tomorrow we will start back up again but be more cautious and ensure we're warm enough. I've also been spending so much time getting to know people I've met through neighborhood Facebook Mom's groups, mutual friends and shared interests, and time networking for business/work. Last week I had a "date" every single day, this week I have had something everyday for half of the week, and next week I have something everyday again. I am getting close to starting work, so I've truly enjoyed making connections with people and putting myself out there in a way I've never done before.

As for shopping, I bought a cashmere cardigan from Hermes (1 of my 6 non-ethical/sustainable clothing or shoe purchases for the year) and my Kelly 25 so far. I have resisted a number of Chanel and Louis Vuitton bag purchases, which I think I'll continue to do. No sales, but I don't currently have much listed. Once I have a job, I'll be purchasing some new workwear items from Everlane and my friend's sustainable clothing store. I will also need a work bag and I'm eyeing one from Dagne Dover.

 

[More bags]

Hugs are always welcome, the thing that touched me most that during his last few days dad actually hugged me and stroked my hair and I was choking up, it is something that hasn't happened before, I guess his way of making peace. When I say it didn't happen before, I think it did when I was a baby, but I grew up with that you keep the stiff upper lip at all times and displays of affection are crude, embarrassing and only to be done in absolute privacy. Growing up it was kind of hard to stomach and I rebelled A LOT, now I understand that they were the product of a really strict upbringing, did their best but were caught in their own upbringing, as a teenager it is really hard to understand, I always thought they disliked me, as much as I strived to do academically and professionally well, I was always told I could do better. I now understand they were trying to push me and thought I would relax if I got praise, totally wrong, might have worked even harder for praise.
For mom getting things somebody bought for her, it's a sign that she is loved, she is still cared for, spent ages on the phone with her where she told me about her day, we went through dad's passing away and what lead up to it (which she hid from all of us, you know "illness doesn't happen in our family, memory loss because you are on meds, doesn't happen...) I told her she did her best.

Dad is at peace now, he is not suffering any longer, resentment is pretty pointless, there's only mom now and if sending her a parcel every 2 weeks, flying over twice a month and dragging her out by pretending I need to buy something, or I need a pedicure, etc., small price. I got a ton of frequent flyer miles just from traveling on business, might simply use them to book a few short trips for her and maybe one of the friends she has, then tell her she doesn't take it it will be lost (she does dislike waste) and tell her she can tell dad all about it when she visits his grave (I am not religious but mom is) and how he would approve. Since she was so used to a man making decisions, I think I blame DH (who she totally adores) and she will be much less likely to argue about it.

It's a bit nuts, I went out previously and got her handbags and cashmere sweaters, she praised DH's taste, I love DH very much, but he knows as much about fashion as I do about rocket science, but I guess for her men make the decisions (maybe I need a maternity test, lol, the apple fell quite far from the tree), I recall dad suffering through her buying handbags, he was always pretty exasperated and went "She has tons of them, why on earth does she need another one? Do I have to be dragged through a lo of stores and look at ugly things and decide which other one she needs to carry her wallet and keys in?" If it gives her comfort to think a man picked something out, I am totally cool with it.

Beautiful post Gabs. I hope happy memories help you through this challenging time. It sounds like you’re already thinking of many ways to help facilitate you and your mom making some new memories too.

 

[missie1]

@missie1 I vote medium. It is more practical. But I think you have to ask yourself if you tend to wear crossbody more or handheld more and that may lead to the answer.


Ladies. So my HG from many years ago appeared in great condition for a great price, but I already bought my 1 bag and the other bags I've listed aren't moving :*( what to do (it's a miu miu medium coffer in mughetto for less than $300). I'm very torn.

I think I need them both because they serve to different purposes..

 

[missie1]

missie, you look fabulous! I like the pop of red and I think the medium with flap sounds more practical. I realize you already have red bag coverage, I like the idea of black patent- didn’t Lady Diana have one in black patent? Good luck deciding, I don’t think you can go wrong with whatever you choose.

Thanks so much. I am leaning towards the black patent. I have to google lady Diana and see which one she had

 

[dcooney4]

Beautiful Dreamer!

Thank you!

 

[Gabs007]

Ladies. So my HG from many years ago appeared in great condition for a great price, but I already bought my 1 bag and the other bags I've listed aren't moving :*( what to do (it's a miu miu medium coffer in mughetto for less than $300). I'm very torn.

Maybe get it, i it really makes your heart sing, then don't buy anything when your bags finally move? I noticed that things seem to have odd patterns, sometimes items don't shift for weeks or even months, then all of a sudden it's like a run and you sell 5 in a week.

 

[cowgirlsboots]

Look, a bag will never make you happy, with what you describe the reward is even bigger because you make a bargain, the odd seller who found something in a thrift shop and doesn't know what they have. Don't laugh but the things in my wardrobe I cherish most are bargains and steals, makes it so much more valuable to me, so much more attached to them than items I paid full price for.

Being able to afford a fabulous bag, great, but again. that quick fix does not make your life better, if you lust after a particular bag, nothing wrong with it, really, lusting after luxury items pushed me to do well in university and business, but at the end of the day they are just that, luxury items. The 1st Prada wallet I bought as a student, from an outlet, doing extra shifts waitressing, it meant so much more to me than any bag I could afford, I cried when it was stolen (after more than 10 years of wear), not because of the money I had in it or the hassle of replacing the cards, just the sense of achievement and that I had a real Prada item and paid for it myself, never bought simply another one, as it would not be the same (though a fab wallet).

Bags and such are nice, but they are just the icing on the cake, if your life sucks no bag on earth will make it better, if your life is good, that bag is just another reason to smile, basically, as well made as they are, as beautiful as some of them are, as high the prices the designers slap on them, in reality they are only worth what somebody is willing to pay for them.

Thank-you!
What you describe is actually how I´m feeling today! The sun is shining, winter darkness has moved into the background and I am seeing clearer...

...a quick luxury bag-fix at a ludicrous price wouldn´t make me happy at all. Maybe I´d feel great in the very moment of the purchase, but no later than unpacking the bag and trying it on disillusionment would kick in accompanied by the question "what have I done?".

In the end the fabulous Boy Bag or a Chanel Double Flap are just bags- bags everybody seems to want, many seem to have. But what do the designs mean to myself? Honestly: nothing! They are classic, but for me personally lack the background story-time I find in my beloved Galliano bags. I´m not everybody, I´m not many, I´m myself: mad pram collector, lover of vintage clothing and quirky items that come with a story!
There´s no need for "just luxury items"!

I so feel for you for the lost Prada wallet! My heart goes out to you!

PS: I bought a rather shabby leather vintage bag by Assima for 7,50 Euro. The shape shouted out to me:"Get me, work on me, make me your own!" Now let´s see what I can do- a custom bag project to satisfy my longing for a boxed shaped shoulder bag. (I actually want to take with me for mundane things like grocery shopping!)

 

[dcooney4]

Thank-you!
What you describe is actually how I´m feeling today! The sun is shining, winter darkness has moved into the background and I am seeing clearer...

...a quick luxury bag-fix at a ludicrous price wouldn´t make me happy at all. Maybe I´d feel great in the very moment of the purchase, but no later than unpacking the bag and trying it on disillusionment would kick in accompanied by the question "what have I done?".

In the end the fabulous Boy Bag or a Chanel Double Flap are just bags- bags everybody seems to want, many seem to have. But what do the designs mean to myself? Honestly: nothing! They are classic, but for me personally lack the background story-time I find in my beloved Galliano bags. I´m not everybody, I´m not many, I´m myself: mad pram collector, lover of vintage clothing and quirky items that come with a story!
There´s no need for "just luxury items"!

I so feel for you for the lost Prada wallet! My heart goes out to you!

PS: I bought a rather shabby leather vintage bag by Assima for 7,50 Euro. The shape shouted out to me:"Get me, work on me, make me your own!" Now let´s see what I can do- a custom bag project to satisfy my longing for a boxed shaped shoulder bag. (I actually want to take with me for mundane things like grocery shopping!)

Please do before and after photos. I love watching a good project in progress.

 

[dcooney4]

Sold a sport bag this morning. I realized that the fossil bag my Mom gave for Christmas could replace the lululemon bag and my Mom would be delighted if she saw me using it at art fairs or dog walking etc.

 

[Gabs007]

PS: I bought a rather shabby leather vintage bag by Assima for 7,50 Euro. The shape shouted out to me:"Get me, work on me, make me your own!" Now let´s see what I can do- a custom bag project to satisfy my longing for a boxed shaped shoulder bag. (I actually want to take with me for mundane things like grocery shopping!)

Totally love that, you know hubby and I are in the process of moving countries, I have so much stuff, really good quality bags with quirky designs and such which I just collected because I do love strolling through flea markets and charity shops, perfect for destressing (and less expensive than buying at a whim because you feel frustrated...) a lot of them are totally fab but I don't use them and don't want to throw them out, If you want, PM me, I shall take pics when I am on my "clear out, make pile of items you are not going to take" kick, if you like them I just put them in a cardboard box, send them to you and you can customize to your heart's content. It's not high end stuff, often little known artisans, but just things I liked the look and the quality, some will need some work, but sounds like they would be going to a home where they are appreciated, if you don't like them, you can always chuck them out.

 

[Jbizzybeetle]

I took a super big step—for me, at least—by returning a bag I very much loved to look at but realized just did not work for me to carry, not during winter when heavy shawls and light jackets are my go-to wardrobe. The canvas shoulder strap of the Hermes Evelyne PM just kept slipping off, and on its own isn’t long enuf for me to wear crossbody, in addition to being difficult for me to reach into around, under, over the shawls. Return Time was running out to try strap extenders, etc., and I was also finding the opening tight, probably spoiled by carrying a tote for about a year.

The really interesting thing: carrying a structured handbag for the first time in decades. I really can’t recall a bag other than a shoulder or crossbody or tote or at times a briefcase since middle school. And it’s a blast! It’s so predictable how it reacts to being opened, taking my fourbi, set down on its feet without getting tipsy; haven’t thrown it behind me in the jeep yet but the day will come. The structure is birkin-like with painted words: “Still on the Waitlist,” supposedly by Boyarde Art. I call it “JJ,” short for justjokinnotabirkin. Give it some more time, might convert me to the real thing.

 

[sexycombover]

@Gabs007 @piperdog I'm so sorry for your losses and praying for healing as you and your families continue to adjust and grieve. Let me know if you need an outlet to talk. I'm always happy to DM.

So, ladies. I have no willpower. I didn't buy (yet) the miu miu, but ended up buying a vintage dooney briefcase cause it looks awesome and I got it for $32UsD. I understand it counts as a bag. My bags that aren't moving will be brought to consignment once the friggin snow stops. I have sold a lot of things since Jan 1 though: 8 items, 2 of which were bags I should have never bought in the first place, and one SLG. So while I haven't succeeded in sticking to my own closet, I am still doing ok in the sales and budget front. I was up $665 and spent about $350 so far in total. $80 of that was for snow boots I needed, but I will count it was frivolous anyway to keep myself more strict. My original $700 budget for 2020 remains untapped. I'm trying to not get discouraged and just count small victories. Also, can you ladies stop looking so stylish in your mod shots?! This is why I end up coveting a bag that likely isn't suitable for me. Hahaha.

 

[Gabs007]

@Gabs007 @piperdog I'm so sorry for your losses and praying for healing as you and your families continue to adjust and grieve. Let me know if you need an outlet to talk. I'm always happy to DM.

So, ladies. I have no willpower. I didn't buy (yet) the miu miu, but ended up buying a vintage dooney briefcase cause it looks awesome and I got it for $32UsD. I understand it counts as a bag. My bags that aren't moving will be brought to consignment once the friggin snow stops. I have sold a lot of things since Jan 1 though: 8 items, 2 of which were bags I should have never bought in the first place, and one SLG. So while I haven't succeeded in sticking to my own closet, I am still doing ok in the sales and budget front. I was up $665 and spent about $350 so far in total. $80 of that was for snow boots I needed, but I will count it was frivolous anyway to keep myself more strict. My original $700 budget for 2020 remains untapped. I'm trying to not get discouraged and just count small victories. Also, can you ladies stop looking so stylish in your mod shots?! This is why I end up coveting a bag that likely isn't suitable for me. Hahaha.

Snow shoes you need are super fine, and a $32 bag doesn't count, that is a bargain!

 

[Cookiefiend]

I took a super big step—for me, at least—by returning a bag I very much loved to look at but realized just did not work for me to carry, not during winter when heavy shawls and light jackets are my go-to wardrobe. The canvas shoulder strap of the Hermes Evelyne PM just kept slipping off, and on its own isn’t long enuf for me to wear crossbody, in addition to being difficult for me to reach into around, under, over the shawls. Return Time was running out to try strap extenders, etc., and I was also finding the opening tight, probably spoiled by carrying a tote for about a year.

The really interesting thing: carrying a structured handbag for the first time in decades. I really can’t recall a bag other than a shoulder or crossbody or tote or at times a briefcase since middle school. And it’s a blast! It’s so predictable how it reacts to being opened, taking my fourbi, set down on its feet without getting tipsy; haven’t thrown it behind me in the jeep yet but the day will come. The structure is birkin-like with painted words: “Still on the Waitlist,” supposedly by Boyarde Art. I call it “JJ,” short for justjokinnotabirkin. Give it some more time, might convert me to the real thing.

Good for you and you imparted some very important information - so I thank you!
If the shoulder strap for the Evie is too short for you, I am certain it would be too short for me. No more thoughts about "Gee - would I like an Evie?", because now I know the answer!
I hear you on the structured bag love - i them!
I like seeing all the soft, squishy, puddles of beautiful leather, but i know they aren't for me. I have finally learned my lesson! Give me structure!