My friend drinks a bottle of wine a night.................

how many nights per week is it safe to drink a bottle of wine?

  • 1?

  • 2?

  • 3?

  • 4?

  • 5?

  • 6?

  • 7?

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#46
I'm sure your friend is a very nice person, and alcoholics
can be nice people as well. Starting out drinking socially, progressing to a whole bottle of wine every night alone sounds well on the way to alcoholism, IMO. It's a progressive disease, and only gets worse, if it is not treated. Maybe she will want to stop on her own, and can do so. Maybe she will continue to drink more and reach her own personal bottom. Many people feel that without help, it is just too much! AA may be just the help she needs, if she's willing, but you can't do that for her. Friends like you letting her know that you're concerned about her drinking is one of the many consequences that she may continue to experience.
You need to take care of yourself and your family and giving a program like Al-Anon a try can help you to understand "love with detachment".:yes:
 
#47
Heya Roz I know you're probably asleep now, but here's another supportive hug coming your way for you and your friend.

The fact you weren't offering alcohol when she came over to visit is also a serious problem, along with her downing a bottle per night. Just to sleep? I don't think so. She's in pain and numbing herself so she won't hurt.

Hopefully therapy or exercise or taking up another hobby can help her work through her pain without self medicating anymore.

The fact that you're being a good friend and expressing your concerns is really all you can do.

Yes, they say an occasional glass of red wine is good for the heart but NO WAY a bottle per night. That's just asking for trouble health-wise not to mention empty calories.
 
#48
bagnshoofetish said:
Alcoholism isn't necessarily about how much you drink or what you drink (ie; wine vs. liquor) its that you feel that you cannot do without it.
Click to expand...

So true.

I wonder how your friend is feeling health wise, a bottle of wine every night is a lot for the system to cope with..it's just that I've noticed how the hangovers get worse with age (really ain't fair) and if she's in her mid-forties, she must feel this alcohol consumption is taking its toll (though she probably won't admit that)

If she won't admit to you that she has a problem, she's not going to admit it's affecting her health...

Not much you can do here, Roz, anybody who has ever dealt with an addict (and I'm pretty sure she is, even if she stopped for a couple of weeks due to dieting..at least that's what she told you..) knows there's only one way for this person to recover and that is for her to accept she has a problem and be willing to seek help..

Just keep an eye on this girl, and remember how she could be in denial about how much she drinks, she says she stops with one bottle, unfortunately that might not be entirely true.. (God, I sound like I'm blowing things out of proportion here, hope I'm wrong)
 
#49
oh dear.. every night? i can easily drink a whole bottle but i wouldn't dream of doing it every night.. i can even do it two nights a week but not every week, just those odd weeks when there are a lot of parties or special occassions. i don't think being able to drink a whole bottle is a huge deal, some people can handle it more easily than others, but doing it (and feeling that you have to do it) every night can become a problem.
 
#51
I always thought the definition of an alcoholic was when it had totally taken over your life and you were unable to do anything else.
To my mind if she can stop to try and lose weight and still function without it then she's not an alcoholic.

If she's using it to help her sleep then I'd have thought that wine was probably safer than a lot of the drugs that the doctors dish out.

I tend to drink only on weekends, I open a bottle when I get in from work and it lasts throughout the night and I finish it. My bf doesn't drink wine but I don't think a bottle over 5 or so hours is excessive by any means.
 
#52
To be totally blunt there is nothing you can do Roz. She has to realise herself that she is using alcohol as a crutch or coping mechanism.

Other than this blip she sounds like a well adjusted reasonable person and probably hasn't had her "breakdown into a snivelling snotty wreck night".

Give her a bit more time, if it progresses to 2 bottles in an evening with no hangover or that she can no longer visit you because you won't offer her a drink then worry/interfere if you think your friendship is strong enough but be prepared for her to tell you to mind your own business and slam the door in your face.
 
#53
ILoveMyBug said:
I always thought the definition of an alcoholic was when it had totally taken over your life and you were unable to do anything else.
To my mind if she can stop to try and lose weight and still function without it then she's not an alcoholic.

.
Click to expand...
Yes I was wondering about this also. Her life is not visibly affected it by it at all & she can decide that she won't drink for a while without difficulty. :confused1:
 
#54
BagAngel said:
Yes I was wondering about this also. Her life is not visibly affected it by it at all & she can decide that she won't drink for a while without difficulty. :confused1:
Click to expand...

She could be a functional alcoholic. It doesn't mean she's not one.

Either way, drinking a bottle of wine a night is certainly not a healthy habit. Anything in extremes is not good. I could ate a gallon of ice cream ever single night and not gain any weight, but it's still not a good thing to do, you know?

It's the routine of it-drinking an entire bottle by herself every night to fall asleep. That's not a healthy pattern for anyone. Maybe you could suggest to her that if she's having trouble falling asleep, she should see a doctor.

If you do a little research into a good therapist in your area, you could always give her that information in a nonthreatening way, "My coworker Bob had insomnia for a while, and saw this doctor. Bob says he's a completely different person now that the doctor helped him."
 
#58
Is she drinking the bottle herself? I once lived with four people and it was not uncommon for us to split a bottle as much as four nights a week.
 
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