Ladies...Any RUDE/CATTY/SNIDE/NASTY Remarks about your Birkins or ANY Hermès Purchase

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#661
I tend to agree with India on the recent discussion. The thread was started by stories of members who were just going about their business with family and friends and Nasty comments were made without any provocation or encouragement by the member. I think its fair to say we are all entitled to spend our money where we see fit ( pension, 401 k, house, car, bag, jewels, golf clubs, art work, holidays whatever) and we are entitled to the quiet un judged enjoyment of our purchases if that is what we want.

However, The recent poster and anyone who does similar ie who discusses their expensive purchases either prior or future with people they already know wouldn't approve or understand can't really be surprised if they then receive negative reactions from those same people. To expect anything else is a little naive. Its called freedom of speech and can be hurtful to be on the receiving end so why put ourselves there??!!?

I am careful about what bag I carry to work as I don't want anything to count against me. Should I have to care? No but reality is that people will judge and I don't want it to affect my career or earning power.... I carry a Bolide or Chanel cerf but would never ever bring a birkjn there. Any negative response could ultimately have a direct effect on my luxuries purchasing power so why risk it?

If I go out in manhattan I carry either a bbk, Judith Leiber or Anya Hindmarch or Chanel clutch. ( will be a Medor once i find one) Why? Because I'm having fun, I love my bags & I don't care what the people I meet think.

My friends would never spend as much on handbags but they all wear expensive watches and jewelry so they can relate.If anyone else makes nasty or negative comments I'll respond politely with something suitable then carry on with my evening and forget about it.

Just my 2 cents!
 
#662
Hermesforlife said:
I tend to agree with India on the recent discussion. The thread was started by stories of members who were just going about their business with family and friends and Nasty comments were made without any provocation or encouragement by the member. I think its fair to say we are all entitled to spend our money where we see fit ( pension, 401 k, house, car, bag, jewels, golf clubs, art work, holidays whatever) and we are entitled to the quiet un judged enjoyment of our purchases if that is what we want.

However, The recent poster and anyone who does similar ie who discusses their expensive purchases either prior or future with people they already know wouldn't approve or understand can't really be surprised if they then receive negative reactions from those same people. To expect anything else is a little naive. Its called freedom of speech and can be hurtful to be on the receiving end so why put ourselves there??!!?

I am careful about what bag I carry to work as I don't want anything to count against me. Should I have to care? No but reality is that people will judge and I don't want it to affect my career or earning power.... I carry a Bolide or Chanel cerf but would never ever bring a birkjn there. Any negative response could ultimately have a direct effect on my luxuries purchasing power so why risk it?

If I go out in manhattan I carry either a bbk, Judith Leiber or Anya Hindmarch or Chanel clutch. ( will be a Medor once i find one) Why? Because I'm having fun, I love my bags & I don't care what the people I meet think.

My friends would never spend as much on handbags but they all wear expensive watches and jewelry so they can relate.If anyone else makes nasty or negative comments I'll respond politely with something suitable then carry on with my evening and forget about it.

Just my 2 cents!
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I agree also. Recognizing the impact of carrying an item where the whole world knows the rather high price is not the same thing as judging or disapproving. We dress for an impact and what we carry also makes its own statement, which can easily be misinterpreted. If someone is rude, then that's a rude person, but there are also quieter, somewhat more tactful people who will still, consciously or not, make assumptions. This thread is about the rude people ;) but that does not obviate the fact that certain items have baggage (no pun intended ;-))
I have been challenged by friends on carrying a Birkin, but in general it comes in a conversation that is already about finances, and to me it's ok for a close pal to bring up such things.
Most comments I get are more like this: I was in line at a museum of Egyptian antiquities and the woman in front of me in the line to enter was wearing an ankh necklace. The museum docent said, "Hey, I know that symbol!" The very fabulous man behind me in line pointed at my bag and said to me "And I know THAT symbol!" I took it as a compliment.
 
#663
I think the only who can really appreciate are the one who owns and know hermes, and the ones that gives rude comments are the ones who are jealous because they don't have one! But I bet you guys once they have one, they will tell the world they have hermes!!! ( just my opinion)...
 
#664
i don't know if this counts as catty or nasty, but maybe a little rude? it is true but i still was surprised a complete stranger said it. i go to the same pharmacy for groceries, medicine etc and see the same girl there who checks me out. and she recently said to me, "i have seen you here with 4 different hermes bags, do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?" i was kind of taken aback, as i didn't even think she looked at me; i look at her, but she never meets my eye contact. she is 100% right, but it did feel a little inappropriate; sometimes i forget people are so observant.
 
#665
LamborghiniGirl said:
i don't know if this counts as catty or nasty, but maybe a little rude? it is true but i still was surprised a complete stranger said it. i go to the same pharmacy for groceries, medicine etc and see the same girl there who checks me out. and she recently said to me, "i have seen you here with 4 different hermes bags, do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?" i was kind of taken aback, as i didn't even think she looked at me; i look at her, but she never meets my eye contact. she is 100% right, but it did feel a little inappropriate; sometimes i forget people are so observant.
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That comment to me was rude, catty and jealous. First, she insults your intelligence by presuming you can't add up, yes you know perfectly well what you could buy for an equivalent amount. But you are in the fortunate position you must have plenty of disposable income and don't need a lecture on what you should be buying from her. Secondly, a person with any manners would not be so rude as to point out how you should spend your money. As she obviously knows how many bags you have and says so, she is probably jealous and this is what is motivating her. Try not to let it worry you, regrettably when we carry these bags there can be the odd occasion where you might be targeted, so continue carrying your lovely bags and enjoy! I was walking through a large dept store a while back carrying my black Kelly, I was also carrying it low in the hand so it wasn't obvious. Some girl walking towards me spotted the bag, smirked and rolled her eyes. It was very rude, but this kind of thing happens sometimes, just carry on and enjoy your good fortune!

PS- hugs to Misto!
 
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#666
I would have had a good old time with that pharmacy lady:
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: No, I didn't realize that. My car cost 10 times that amount.
-or-
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: Yes, I realize that. I went to school and I can read. I chose not to purchase a car.
 
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#667
Sambina, the fact that it was a friend of several years who commented about your Birkin, he must have felt comfortable doing so. Yes he was a little blunt and rude, but I think how many times some of my friends have said, "You paid how much for that bag?"
As long as you don't flaunt what you have, and I'm sure you don't, be proud that you have class and style.
And work it girl!!!
 
#668
YAY! It's not just shallow obsessing (we do plenty here on purseforum)! griping allowed too :amuse:

I need to get this off my chest. A few years back, when I got engaged, my then fiance bought me my first Hermes B as an engagement gift (+E. ring, of course). I received congrats from most friends, except for one. Her catty putdown was '"interesting color of a bag... I don't consider that an appropriate kind of bag to have unless I have a driver.."'

My thoughts... If tpf members, who are mostly strangers and e-friends, can be happy for each other (and squeal for each other over a reveal), why do I need someone so rotten like that? Needless to say she is no longer a friend.
 
#669
LamborghiniGirl said:
i don't know if this counts as catty or nasty, but maybe a little rude? it is true but i still was surprised a complete stranger said it. i go to the same pharmacy for groceries, medicine etc and see the same girl there who checks me out. and she recently said to me, "i have seen you here with 4 different hermes bags, do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?" i was kind of taken aback, as i didn't even think she looked at me; i look at her, but she never meets my eye contact. she is 100% right, but it did feel a little inappropriate; sometimes i forget people are so observant.
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:kiss:

Awww, sweetie... that is plain rude. I don't have a car... I don't even have my driver's license... but it's ok, I have a super luxury limo called the 6 train.

whatever happened to if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything? she may not have meant it in a vindictive way but some people are just boggled by the amount of money involved. To be fair, it is a huge amount of money.

I've had many people tell me, oh I wouldn't spend so much money on XYZ but not all of them say it in a judgmental way. Similarly, I wouldn't spend money on a car because parking would cost more than the car and traffic is just infinitely more obnoxious!
 
#670
Madam Bijoux said:
I would have had a good old time with that pharmacy lady:
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: No, I didn't realize that. My car cost 10 times that amount.
-or-
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: Yes, I realize that. I went to school and I can read. I chose not to purchase a car.
Click to expand...

This. Either would be a good come back.
 
#673
LamborghiniGirl said:
i don't know if this counts as catty or nasty, but maybe a little rude? it is true but i still was surprised a complete stranger said it. i go to the same pharmacy for groceries, medicine etc and see the same girl there who checks me out. and she recently said to me, "i have seen you here with 4 different hermes bags, do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?" i was kind of taken aback, as i didn't even think she looked at me; i look at her, but she never meets my eye contact. she is 100% right, but it did feel a little inappropriate; sometimes i forget people are so observant.
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It is amazing how observant people are... A little scary if you let your mind kick that around...

Madam Bijoux said:
I would have had a good old time with that pharmacy lady:
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: No, I didn't realize that. My car cost 10 times that amount.
-or-
Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: Yes, I realize that. I went to school and I can read. I chose not to purchase a car.
Click to expand...

LOL! I would also maybe add:

Pharmacy lady: Do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?
Me: Do you realize a car depreciates the second you pull it off the lot?!

I will NEVER understand the car comparisons....but as I always say....everyone has something they spend money on. I don't judge car purchases....don't judge my spending habits.
 
#674
LamborghiniGirl said:
i don't know if this counts as catty or nasty, but maybe a little rude? it is true but i still was surprised a complete stranger said it. i go to the same pharmacy for groceries, medicine etc and see the same girl there who checks me out. and she recently said to me, "i have seen you here with 4 different hermes bags, do you realize you could have purchased a car for that same amount?" i was kind of taken aback, as i didn't even think she looked at me; i look at her, but she never meets my eye contact. she is 100% right, but it did feel a little inappropriate; sometimes i forget people are so observant.
Click to expand...

Just Plain RUDE! And inappropriate... I assume her boss/supervisor was nowhere to be seen. I assume you have never complained about their prices! How DARE she! (a little rightous indignation...!)
 
#675
I hate when complete strangers ask "how did you afford that?" when I wear my birkin or Kelly. I don't know you and you don't know me so how do you know I'm not a socialite, Bollywood actress etc. it's very rude. I love when I get a comment on my bags because someone finds them beautiful and not just because it says Hermes on it. I also cannot tolerate the dirty looks, snickers and pointing. I also despise sales associates who act rude r mistreat me because of my handbag. It's so catty and childish.
 
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