Do wet want some new challenges in August?
How about wearing one non-black neutral per week (whatever is a neutral for you)
How about wearing one non-black neutral per week (whatever is a neutral for you)
2025 Resolution: Shopping my own Bag and SLG Collection
- Thread starter papertiger
- Start date
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Thanks! It's supposed to be sometime this week. They haven't given us a time yet.
It's not 30 degrees, it's more like the low is 36, then it gets up to the high 50s during the day. The coolest it has gotten inside our house overnight has been around 60F, so it is bearable. I'm bundling up and drinking a lot of hot tea. I have an electric throw on the couch.
Everything you wrote here is spot on; you captured it really well!Hey Sparks, you're too hard on yourself!
You've had brain surgery and multiple follow up surgeries! You're allowed to take a breath and take some time bouncing back!
You don't need to be the best version of yourself to be out living your life instead of browsing online. If I had waited until I wasn't ill to live, I would've wasted years of my life.
It's bad enough that we lose time in the hospital preparing for these surgeries, then recovering post-operatively, and then lose more time as we gradually start feeling like ourselves and returning to the real world. Don't impose a further limitation by waiting until you're at your goals to live fully.
I don't know if I'm explaining myself well, but I understand how you feel. I've been in and out of hospital since 2017 and have had more surgeries than I can count. I did a lot of online shopping and my collection saw a lot of movement from around 2018-2022-ish. I was feeling sorry for myself, quite literally having my 'last hoorah' since I was told I was dying anyway. I posted a lot on here, I browsed a lot, I accepted bags from friends who wanted me to feel sated while I had the chance. My bag collection had a lot of ins and a lot of outs. Now, I'm still here, and looking back, all that movement didn't really help anything. Retail therapy didn't help, not even a little.
I didn't feel better, I didn't feel like more of myself, and I didn't even enjoy my purchases! In fact, I made some really bad bag purchases that I let go of as soon as I received them. It was all supposed to be a pleasant distraction as I built my ideal collection, but instead, it was noise. It me "handling stuff" and keeping my hands and mind occupied, when I should have just "sat". I should have just sat with the feeling of being fed up of hospitals, of not being quite myself, of not knowing what comes next. I should have sat with the uncomfortable feelings and accepted this chapter isn't what I wanted for myself, but it is what it is.
It's almost like when people set a '1 in- 1 out' rule for their bag collections. It serves a purpose of containing the total collection so it doesn't grow exponentially, but... you're still consuming. You're not content, you're not sitting with what you already own, you're still in the cycle, just under a different format.
Does that make sense?
Sometimes we get stuck in a pattern that we think is serving us when it isn't. What serves us better is just sitting with the reality that the present circumstances aren't ideal. You're not as fit as you were, you're not as healthy as you were, and that's okay! You will get there. I promise you will. Your body has endured a lot and it's tired. It'll bounce back when it's ready. You can feel really good in your skin right now, even if it's not the skin you're used to.
Fighting the reality of now and putting all this extra mental pressure on yourself to get back to your 'best self' isn't serving you. Retail therapy to cope with your disappointment won't soothe you. It won't make any of it happen any faster, it'll just make you feel depressed on the way to your end goal. You're walking the same road to your goal post and you will reach that finish line- there is no doubt. The choice you have to make is if you're going to beat yourself up the whole way there or if you're going to thank your body for the journey it's taking. Does any of that make sense?
I'm just trying to tell you to be gentle with yourself because, my dear pocket friend, you've been through a lot! You're allowed to take time to be your best again. And everything you are right now is perfect anyway! You may not feel like your best self, but you are still perfect in this state. Nobody sees the imperfection you do. Take a deep breath and know that you will reach all your goals because you're already on the way there. Enjoy the journey and stop looking for distractions from it. There is a lot of peace to be found if you're not busy distracting yourself from it.
I'm not sure if any of this is clear or if you can tell that I'm saying all this gently and with kindness (impossible to convey tone in writing!) but I assure you that I am. I have been exactly where you are, and am, in fact, in this battle with myself right now. I tell myself everything I have told you and it helps me get grounded and focused on the right things again.
Be proud of yourself because you've taken these hard knocks with grace. You've got this. Focus on how strong you body is to have survived all this, rather on how much it has changed.
I love your overall aim to buy only true loves! It's what we should all aspire to, so thank you for always reminding us of that!
Edit: I wish there was someone else saying all this instead of me. I feel like someone smarter would say it all better! I'm sending you virtual hugs! The hardest parts are already over and you handled all that so well. Hopefully life just keeps getting better and you soon feel 100% again!
The bolded especially resonates with me. I received a diagnosis in my early 30s (Multiple Sclerosis) that I wasn’t expecting and that I have had to learn to live with. If, as you say, I waited until I felt 100% again to live my life, I would have missed out on a lot these past 20 years. There is no 100% for me, not the way I remember it, so I’ve had to learn to reframe.
@Sparkletastic, from one Type A to another, I know you can do it. It won’t be easy and you’ll have good days and bad, but you can do it. Stop beating yourself up for not being where you were and, as @Bag peace says, commend yourself for getting through everything you’ve been challenged with to date and coming out in the great place you are now. Give yourself a break. You deserve to be kind to yourself!
And @Bag peace, I can’t imagine all the hard things you’ve been through. I remain amazed by how kind and generous you are towards others given all of what you’ve shared.
Yikes!? This is crazy! Please stay safe!
Whoa! I hate that the most important things always cost so much money!
Stay safe and warm, and hopefully it gets replaced asap.
This is exactly my situation. I'll never be what I was before, but I've learned to accept this iteration of my body, limitations and all. A lot of it is just mentally accepting that nothing is constant. MS is awful and I'm blown away by how you're embracing it instead of letting it limit you. You're so resilient and this attitude is inspirational! You're amazing!
___
To stay on topic of shopping our own closets (because I've had a gentle nudge from mods about going off on tangents, lol); my mum and I have been shopping each other's closets! She isn't able to carry a couple of her bags anymore because they're now too heavy, so she's given them to me. In exchange, I've given her my smallest and lightest bag, which actually suits her a lot more than it does me!
This exercise has made me realise that a lot of my bags are exceptionally heavy. I need to prioritize using them now while I can still do so comfortably, because it certainly isn't going to get any easier as I get older.
You said it all perfectly! Love your postHey Sparks, you're too hard on yourself!
You've had brain surgery and multiple follow up surgeries! You're allowed to take a breath and take some time bouncing back!
You don't need to be the best version of yourself to be out living your life instead of browsing online. If I had waited until I wasn't ill to live, I would've wasted years of my life.
It's bad enough that we lose time in the hospital preparing for these surgeries, then recovering post-operatively, and then lose more time as we gradually start feeling like ourselves and returning to the real world. Don't impose a further limitation by waiting until you're at your goals to live fully.
I don't know if I'm explaining myself well, but I understand how you feel. I've been in and out of hospital since 2017 and have had more surgeries than I can count. I did a lot of online shopping and my collection saw a lot of movement from around 2018-2022-ish. I was feeling sorry for myself, quite literally having my 'last hoorah' since I was told I was dying anyway. I posted a lot on here, I browsed a lot, I accepted bags from friends who wanted me to feel sated while I had the chance. My bag collection had a lot of ins and a lot of outs. Now, I'm still here, and looking back, all that movement didn't really help anything. Retail therapy didn't help, not even a little.
I didn't feel better, I didn't feel like more of myself, and I didn't even enjoy my purchases! In fact, I made some really bad bag purchases that I let go of as soon as I received them. It was all supposed to be a pleasant distraction as I built my ideal collection, but instead, it was noise. It me "handling stuff" and keeping my hands and mind occupied, when I should have just "sat". I should have just sat with the feeling of being fed up of hospitals, of not being quite myself, of not knowing what comes next. I should have sat with the uncomfortable feelings and accepted this chapter isn't what I wanted for myself, but it is what it is.
It's almost like when people set a '1 in- 1 out' rule for their bag collections. It serves a purpose of containing the total collection so it doesn't grow exponentially, but... you're still consuming. You're not content, you're not sitting with what you already own, you're still in the cycle, just under a different format.
Does that make sense?
Sometimes we get stuck in a pattern that we think is serving us when it isn't. What serves us better is just sitting with the reality that the present circumstances aren't ideal. You're not as fit as you were, you're not as healthy as you were, and that's okay! You will get there. I promise you will. Your body has endured a lot and it's tired. It'll bounce back when it's ready. You can feel really good in your skin right now, even if it's not the skin you're used to.
Fighting the reality of now and putting all this extra mental pressure on yourself to get back to your 'best self' isn't serving you. Retail therapy to cope with your disappointment won't soothe you. It won't make any of it happen any faster, it'll just make you feel depressed on the way to your end goal. You're walking the same road to your goal post and you will reach that finish line- there is no doubt. The choice you have to make is if you're going to beat yourself up the whole way there or if you're going to thank your body for the journey it's taking. Does any of that make sense?
I'm just trying to tell you to be gentle with yourself because, my dear pocket friend, you've been through a lot! You're allowed to take time to be your best again. And everything you are right now is perfect anyway! You may not feel like your best self, but you are still perfect in this state. Nobody sees the imperfection you do. Take a deep breath and know that you will reach all your goals because you're already on the way there. Enjoy the journey and stop looking for distractions from it. There is a lot of peace to be found if you're not busy distracting yourself from it.
I'm not sure if any of this is clear or if you can tell that I'm saying all this gently and with kindness (impossible to convey tone in writing!) but I assure you that I am. I have been exactly where you are, and am, in fact, in this battle with myself right now. I tell myself everything I have told you and it helps me get grounded and focused on the right things again.
Be proud of yourself because you've taken these hard knocks with grace. You've got this. Focus on how strong you body is to have survived all this, rather on how much it has changed.
I love your overall aim to buy only true loves! It's what we should all aspire to, so thank you for always reminding us of that!
Edit: I wish there was someone else saying all this instead of me. I feel like someone smarter would say it all better! I'm sending you virtual hugs! The hardest parts are already over and you handled all that so well. Hopefully life just keeps getting better and you soon feel 100% again!
you are an inspiration to many of us on this thread 
The snow and ice melted away on Sunday evening but today is my first day out since we were snowed in. It really feels like I’m shopping my closet as I wear my recently purchased Jimmy Choo caramel leather BonBon bucket bag. 
This is a medium size and I find it better suited for errand days than my 3 beloved mini buckets (2 Jimmy Choo BonBons and 1 Fendi Mon Tresors.) I would definitely get another of these if the right color came out when I’m back in the market for a new bag.
I’m also happy to say that this is one of my favorite bags from last year’s over-the-top shopping spree. It’s a great addition to my collection as I don’t have many bags in the brown —> beige color range. I’m wearing more yellow gold jewelry pieces and this looks great with them. Overall, this bag just makes me happy! It was like Christmas Eve anticipation when I set out today’s outfit last night.
This is a medium size and I find it better suited for errand days than my 3 beloved mini buckets (2 Jimmy Choo BonBons and 1 Fendi Mon Tresors.) I would definitely get another of these if the right color came out when I’m back in the market for a new bag.
I’m also happy to say that this is one of my favorite bags from last year’s over-the-top shopping spree. It’s a great addition to my collection as I don’t have many bags in the brown —> beige color range. I’m wearing more yellow gold jewelry pieces and this looks great with them. Overall, this bag just makes me happy! It was like Christmas Eve anticipation when I set out today’s outfit last night.
In contrast, I’ve definitely decided to sell the brown Prada bauletto bowler bag I purchased last year. I was going to get an organizer to try to keep it from slouching so much but I really don’t feel happy in the bag. (This pic is it fully stuffed with t shirts. It’s actually a saggy puddle.)
I’ll list it for sale tonight. I want all my bag wears to be happy moments like I’m having today. This was just a buying error. So, it’s time for it to bless someone else’s closet.
I’ll list it for sale tonight. I want all my bag wears to be happy moments like I’m having today. This was just a buying error. So, it’s time for it to bless someone else’s closet.
You've inspired me to wear a bag in a similar color. It wasn't a color I was drawn to but when I saw someone on Costco with it, I immediately went on ebay and bought one. (Several years ago)The snow and ice melted away on Sunday evening but today is my first day out since we were snowed in. It really feels like I’m shopping my closet as I wear my recently purchased Jimmy Choo caramel leather BonBon bucket bag.
This is a medium size and I find it better suited for errand days than my 3 beloved mini buckets (2 Jimmy Choo BonBons and 1 Fendi Mon Tresors.) I would definitely get another of these if the right color came out when I’m back in the market for a new bag.
I’m also happy to say that this is one of my favorite bags from last year’s over-the-top shopping spree. It’s a great addition to my collection as I don’t have many bags in the brown —> beige color range. I’m wearing more yellow gold jewelry pieces and this looks great with them. Overall, this bag just makes me happy! It was like Christmas Eve anticipation when I set out today’s outfit last night.
View attachment 6116879
Yay! I wore it with Navy joggers and a navy & white sweatshirt (today was errand running for construction & remodeling items so I was super casual). I wore horse bit Gucci drop hoop earrings and a RTT double charm necklace on thin chain - both in yellow gold to coordinate. White Adidas Stan Smith sneakers with yellow gold accents finished the outfit. The caramel bag was perfect and popped against the navy in the “right” way.
I’d love to see a picture of your bag!
Navy sounds like a beautiful complement! I've got PT tomorrow so I'll be wearing sweats and sneakers. This time of year my ankles get cold when I'm not wearing boots so I may change afterwards. We're getting the new heater installed tomorrow!Yay! I wore it with Navy joggers and a navy & white sweatshirt (today was errand running for construction & remodeling items so I was super casual). I wore horse bit Gucci drop hoop earrings and a RTT double charm necklace on thin chain - both in yellow gold to coordinate. White Adidas Stan Smith sneakers with yellow gold accents finished the outfit. The caramel bag was perfect and popped against the navy in the “right” way.
I’d love to see a picture of your bag!
This is an old picture.
Gorgeous bag and I’m glad to hear you have an ETA for your new heater!
The leather and colour of your Bon Bon are lovely!In contrast, I’ve definitely decided to sell the brown Prada bauletto bowler bag I purchased last year. I was going to get an organizer to try to keep it from slouching so much but I really don’t feel happy in the bag. (This pic is it fully stuffed with t shirts. It’s actually a saggy puddle.)
I’ll list it for sale tonight. I want all my bag wears to be happy moments like I’m having today. This was just a buying error. So, it’s time for it to bless someone else’s closet.
View attachment 6116880
That bag is yummy! I think our bags look like cousins.
Enjoy wearing her well tomorrow! And, I’m so glad the heater is getting installed.
My listing bags for sale are part of my ruthless full house clean out. I am getting rid of anything that we don’t actively use (daily or for special times like holiday decor)
As a result, I have a number of inexpensive items - some still new in box - that need to go. For example, I was gifted some Amazon Echo devices and don’t use them.
It hardly seems worth trying to sell most of these things I don’t want on eBay or FB marketplace.
Question for the group: Do you have a minimum value under which you just donate or pitch items (vs. selling)?
I’m going to hold the next few big delivery boxes that come in and take all of this to a charity. If something is less than $100, I just can’t waste the time on it. In my experience, cheaper items draw the absolute worst buyers. I used to consider selling as a mindless hobby but now it’s just a hassle. So, I think my new minimum may become $250.
As a result, I have a number of inexpensive items - some still new in box - that need to go. For example, I was gifted some Amazon Echo devices and don’t use them.
It hardly seems worth trying to sell most of these things I don’t want on eBay or FB marketplace.
Question for the group: Do you have a minimum value under which you just donate or pitch items (vs. selling)?
I’m going to hold the next few big delivery boxes that come in and take all of this to a charity. If something is less than $100, I just can’t waste the time on it. In my experience, cheaper items draw the absolute worst buyers. I used to consider selling as a mindless hobby but now it’s just a hassle. So, I think my new minimum may become $250.
I don't sell, but I will always pay a "convenience tax" when I have the privilege to do so. If something will cost some money but save me time and energy, I will always choose to lose the money in order to gain time.
The minimum value will be relative to each person, depending on how much they can afford to lose. Most of my bags are around $100 and my most expensive is around $350, and I would readily give those away rather than put in the work to sell them and deal with possible returns and all that hassle.*
My friends constantly lecture me on this because they think my approach is financially irresponsible, but I cannot prioritize relatively small amounts of money (which I can hopefully earn more of) over freeing up my time (which I can't regain once lost).
I'm reminded of a time I lived in a country with poor public transport systems, so it limited commuting options to and from my workplace. My commute was 45 minutes by cab. A coworker lectured me for months about how taking the bus was 10x cheaper, so one day I gave in and took the bus with him.
Well, that bus ride took 3 hours, plus an additional 30 minutes of walking home from the station. That was one-way, after a 12 hour miserable day at work. After that misery, I tried to explain that the additional couple of hours I saved by taking the cab were worth more to me than the extra dollars in my account, but he was a numbers guy and continued to scold me every day as I booked my cab home. You could've held a gun to my head and I still would've taken a cab!
*I've given away lots of fine china and sterling silverware that was worth thousands, but in those cases I donated them to raise money for charity, so I was happy to eat the loss in order to help during times of a natural disaster (the last time was the earthquakes in Turkey-Syria). So, that is also an option worth looking into if you have items you want to be free of and are able to use to contribute to good causes (the current LA fires or something similar). Even something like giving to Dress for Success is a good option, particularly for office-appropriate bags that don't work for you anymore but can help someone who is trying to get their foot in the door. So long as the monetary value would not sting if you do so.
Edit: The types of items I'm thinking of are not what you specified in your OP, sorry! My mind is just catching up
I don't have those kinds of 'bits' because I move too often to accumulate them. To me, those would be out the door immediately to free up space. I'd donate to anyone in the area who could use them. Any neighbours with kids who want the devices, or anybody who may not be able to afford holiday decorations. Even stuff like cushions or bedding, I dryclean and give to any family in the area that could use it, or give to a shelter that can utilize it on their cots.
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