I’ve wondered how you were. Nice to hear back from you. Sorry about what happened. My Mom died at a young age of 52, more than 25 years ago. We didn’t get to be close because at that time she was a bit uptight with finances and I sort of resented that. Or maybe I just couldn’t grasp why she was like that when I believed we had enough. And she was not warm like parents are now. There was distance, but she definitely cared for us. Anyway, I feel like we would have been closer years later, when everyone was working and they wouldn’t have to support us. But then she was gone. I guess what I’m saying is, given the chance we would have been really close.Checking in. It’s been an incredibly difficult past few weeks. My mother had a stroke. I’m an only child and she lives in a different city. She is going to be ok but, has limited motion on her right side.
Unfortunately, my mother is not a “nice” person. I’ve mentioned this before but, probably you all thought it was a “normal” not nice or personality conflict and it isn’t. Case in point:
DS lives in the same city as she. When she was having issues, she called him to take her to the hospital which he did. When she got there, she intimated to the staff that she was afraid of DS because he had pushed her. Long story short, my son - who was missing work and school trying to care for his grandma - was grilled like a felon by the police and my mother’s care was delayed because she sent them down a fake path. Luckily her exam showed there was no push and fall - there was the stroke.
I’ve dealt with her evil since I was little and she has pulled the same type of thing on me to the point I’ve had to be proactive with her doctors and caregivers to let them know how she behaves. But, I’d shielded my children from her horrible nature, so DS is struggling to comprehend how she could want to hurt him. Sadly, I’ve had to tell both kids not to have contact with her and just let me handle things.
And no, she doesn’t have dementia or reduced capacity. She is a proud, braggy, card carrying, clear headed Mensan who has ALWAYS been this way - using hypochondria and drama to torment the family.
So, trying to care for her is difficult and, as you can guess, she doesn’t win any friends at hospitals or care facilities which means I have to hover to make sure she is treated well while I try to stay sane.
This is one of the things DH & I actually bonded over. His mother is just as horrible but in different ways - his mom was physically abusive whereas mine is all about head games. Most people don’t “get it” when you say “mom” is a terrible person and want to shame you into always being forgiving and close to Mama. But, evil comes in all shapes and sizes. All, he and I can do is make sure our mothers are safe and cared for from a distance. Relationship is impossible.
If you have a good mom - hug her close. If you know someone who struggles with their mom - give them a hug too. It’s horrendous.
Anyway, I’m double lump grumpy so, shopping the last thing on my list.But, one of my bracelets sold for 110% of what I paid for it. I’m happy it’s gone but, it was kind of a burden to have to pack and ship it right now.
Happier times are ahead though. Memorial Day weekend should be fun! Fingers crossed.
2019 resolution - shopping my own bag and wallet collection. Any one else?
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I like this green!!!
You have reason to be content! Gorgeous bags!I’m glad I’m not the only one who’s too busy to be active... if this thread was running at its usual frenetic pace, I would have absolutely no hope of keeping up in my ‘lurk and like’ mode
I got back from my vacation, and am tackling my new role as Partner. I think I’m doing okay, but self doubt is lurking in the background... It will be fine, I’m sure!
Bags-wise I’ve been surprisingly content since I bought my YSL envelope (in March) and then my Chanel clutch (in April) to celebrate my promotion. These two bags are basically all I’ve carried since buying them, besides my Le Pliage which I took to beach. That’s very unlike me because I tend to rotate frequently, but I’m enjoying the purse peace
I hope you are feeling better now. That sounds rough.I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with this. And the way she targeted your son is way out of bounds. In my family, it’s my dad who is the narcissist. They are truly toxic people. I don’t know your whole situation, but I can say I feel your pain — having a narcissist for a parent really sucks.
I’ve been MIA from this thread as well, not for anything nearly as dramatic, just a bad mix of busy and sick. Take an upper respiratory bug that causes congestion and uncontrollable coughing, add in pink eye, and that’s been me for the last two weeks.I’ve had a new bag for a while and no energy to do a proper reveal, but hopefully this weekend I’ll post some pics!
Hope you feel better soon!I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with this. And the way she targeted your son is way out of bounds. In my family, it’s my dad who is the narcissist. They are truly toxic people. I don’t know your whole situation, but I can say I feel your pain — having a narcissist for a parent really sucks.
I’ve been MIA from this thread as well, not for anything nearly as dramatic, just a bad mix of busy and sick. Take an upper respiratory bug that causes congestion and uncontrollable coughing, add in pink eye, and that’s been me for the last two weeks.
Sending well-wishes to your father, and to you as well. Health issues with parents really do turn your life upside down — suddenly it becomes clear that the care-taker roles have reversed. It’s enormously stressful. Hope he is OK.
Well said. My DH was blessed with loving, supportive parents so he can’t quite comprehend the dynamic with my dad, even when he sees it in person.
E
Evia
Exactly, I think you have to have lived it, unfortunately. I hope you feel much better soon.
I'm hoping for a quick recovery for your father, and hugs to you.
Shoulder carry! I have enough hand carry. The great thing is I can even carry a small painting in it if need be , without worrying that it might rip.
Such a beautiful, happy pink. This is going to be one of my favorites in your collection.as promised, here it is in action today!
I hope you feel better soon!I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with this. And the way she targeted your son is way out of bounds. In my family, it’s my dad who is the narcissist. They are truly toxic people. I don’t know your whole situation, but I can say I feel your pain — having a narcissist for a parent really sucks.
I’ve been MIA from this thread as well, not for anything nearly as dramatic, just a bad mix of busy and sick. Take an upper respiratory bug that causes congestion and uncontrollable coughing, add in pink eye, and that’s been me for the last two weeks.
And, yes. Most people think a narcissist is a vain person. Nope. They are toxic, predatory people. The saddest part is there is no “cure”. So there is no hope.
I’m sorry you have an N in your midst as well. And, you’re so right. People who haven’t experienced can’t grasp just how uncontrollably destructive they are.
I can certainly understand your feelings of what if and if only.
I hope your father is better soon.