A year and a half ago, I donated 75% of my closet to Goodwill...a ton of random shirts, pants, shoes, etc...nothing special, the most expensive thing was from Hollister, and the estimated worth of all of it was maybe 2500 dollars. Not bad, and a lot of it was unworn and I knew people who found them would feel like they had found a treasure maybe.
Fast forward to today. My closet is stuffed full again, I literally can't close it, and my shoes are kept in a separate area with my handbag boxes stacked in DH's closet (we have two in our bedroom, not a bad deal in an apt!) Luckily he doesn't care, as he's taken over the office with his fishing gear. hee!
The point is, I was liberating myself by giving the clothes I don't wear away to somewhere that can sell them for cheap so someone else can appreciate them...and then I ended up in the same place I was before. When that happened, I realized that I needed to make some changes as to not necessarily what I buy, but how I buy. Though, nowadays in my closet the most expensive things are my designer denim and shoes and not my Hollister hoodies I got on sale. That collection is a lot smaller and none of it will be given away until I stop using it and forget it is there - like a lot of the other stuff in there.
So yes, I had a problem of 'collecting'...I wanted tons of stuff so I would have 'options' even though I wear basically the same outfit every day - jeans, ballet flats, tank top/shirt and sweater/hoodie. I don't care that much for patterns as much as I think I am. So I'm making rules for myself and getting rid of things.
The reason I think this happened (because I never used to be like this), is because A) I can afford it (though I shudder to think about this: had I saved all the money that is in my closet, and only bought the things I actually use, I would have a crapload in savings and could pay off a big chunk of my college loans) and could finally get the brands and types of clothes I *really* wanted, and have a LOT of it...and
B) I'm a soldier, we work damn hard for our money, and our future is not guaranteed - ever. That is true for civilians too - you never know what can happen to you. But really, we have a different perspective about it because it was in our head before we even enlisted/commissioned. I'm not saying that because I think I'm better than anybody else, I'm saying it to illustrate that servicemembers as a group tend to spend their money and play VERY hard. We have things like Thrift Savings Plan to help us save for retirement, but whatever is left we use to our fullest capacity. I don't feel guilty about splurging sometimes, but my shopping trips are growing fewer and fewer between each time, and the times I do go...I usually leave empty handed unless there is a piece that I really really want (like a new sweater of a certain color), because I just feel gross about wanting to 'buy something because I will be so left behind if I don't get it'...I'm glad I'm changing my perspective. I've also tried to be very generous and loaning people stuff or giving shoes/shirts away if I don't wear them, to someone who will use them more. Since joining tPF, I've actually thought about shopping less, surprisingly, yet drooled a lot more and been more careful about buying. Ok, so it's only been a little over a month since I joined, but I stopped shopping before that (still thought about it a LOT)...but my mentality is changing and I'm more just happy to see someone else's reveal than to worry about what I am going to get next or when I can go shopping again.
It is, after all, just stuff. And it all stays behind when we die.
So I buy Coach, and love the Chanel counter at Nordstrom, and dream about Hermes, but it's okay to have specific dreams and loves in life.
Just remember to try to stop obsessing about things, and spend those hours with a person you care about. You will end up filling more fulfilled in the long run, and be busy making memories instead of wasting away at the mall or on your couch.
Fast forward to today. My closet is stuffed full again, I literally can't close it, and my shoes are kept in a separate area with my handbag boxes stacked in DH's closet (we have two in our bedroom, not a bad deal in an apt!) Luckily he doesn't care, as he's taken over the office with his fishing gear. hee!
The point is, I was liberating myself by giving the clothes I don't wear away to somewhere that can sell them for cheap so someone else can appreciate them...and then I ended up in the same place I was before. When that happened, I realized that I needed to make some changes as to not necessarily what I buy, but how I buy. Though, nowadays in my closet the most expensive things are my designer denim and shoes and not my Hollister hoodies I got on sale. That collection is a lot smaller and none of it will be given away until I stop using it and forget it is there - like a lot of the other stuff in there.
So yes, I had a problem of 'collecting'...I wanted tons of stuff so I would have 'options' even though I wear basically the same outfit every day - jeans, ballet flats, tank top/shirt and sweater/hoodie. I don't care that much for patterns as much as I think I am. So I'm making rules for myself and getting rid of things.
The reason I think this happened (because I never used to be like this), is because A) I can afford it (though I shudder to think about this: had I saved all the money that is in my closet, and only bought the things I actually use, I would have a crapload in savings and could pay off a big chunk of my college loans) and could finally get the brands and types of clothes I *really* wanted, and have a LOT of it...and
B) I'm a soldier, we work damn hard for our money, and our future is not guaranteed - ever. That is true for civilians too - you never know what can happen to you. But really, we have a different perspective about it because it was in our head before we even enlisted/commissioned. I'm not saying that because I think I'm better than anybody else, I'm saying it to illustrate that servicemembers as a group tend to spend their money and play VERY hard. We have things like Thrift Savings Plan to help us save for retirement, but whatever is left we use to our fullest capacity. I don't feel guilty about splurging sometimes, but my shopping trips are growing fewer and fewer between each time, and the times I do go...I usually leave empty handed unless there is a piece that I really really want (like a new sweater of a certain color), because I just feel gross about wanting to 'buy something because I will be so left behind if I don't get it'...I'm glad I'm changing my perspective. I've also tried to be very generous and loaning people stuff or giving shoes/shirts away if I don't wear them, to someone who will use them more. Since joining tPF, I've actually thought about shopping less, surprisingly, yet drooled a lot more and been more careful about buying. Ok, so it's only been a little over a month since I joined, but I stopped shopping before that (still thought about it a LOT)...but my mentality is changing and I'm more just happy to see someone else's reveal than to worry about what I am going to get next or when I can go shopping again.
It is, after all, just stuff. And it all stays behind when we die.
So I buy Coach, and love the Chanel counter at Nordstrom, and dream about Hermes, but it's okay to have specific dreams and loves in life.
Just remember to try to stop obsessing about things, and spend those hours with a person you care about. You will end up filling more fulfilled in the long run, and be busy making memories instead of wasting away at the mall or on your couch.
