Official bottega veneta chat thread - thread #4

[jbags07]

Hmmm, maybe point that out to them next time they snark, and wear your bags proudly!

Next time we see them i will bring out my best bags

 

[muchstuff]

Next time we see them i will bring out my best bags

You do that!

 

[Nibb]

This! Yes! So true. We all spend money differently. I get all kinds of judgy remarks from mil about my speedy like its the Hope diamond lol, after she drops 25k on a viking cruise.
I know plenty of people who collect all kinds of stuff, have large and $$$ collections (from guns to cars to art and pottery) yet i get the remarks about too many bags. Because they do not see value in bags. But its ok for them to collect things they feel have value. Most family and friends we visit or spend time with, i don’t bring my nice bags b/c every time i will get snarky comments if i do. I would never critique any of their stuff so its puzzling to me why they feel the need to do so to me. Fil collects and spends staggering amounts of money on camera equipment b/c he enjoys taking pictures….and has a nice rolex on his wrist. But if i wear an H scarf or a designer bag, i get snark. Explain this to me b/c i don’t get it. And it seems like having nice clothes and jewelry is acceptable, but not bags.

So true! They are works of art, therefore perfect items to collect.

Sounds like your FIL is bag bullying you. My dad used to do that with me it’s rude and annoying. It may be generational male thing.

 

[Evergreen602]

I know my mother would judge me for my bag collection if she were still alive. I don't think she had much room to judge. Cleaning out her closet full of clothes with tags still on them, and hundreds of shoes still in boxes never worn - she was a hoarder. Granted, everything was clean and well organized. She had the "just in case" mentality.

Then, trying to sell her massive antique doll collection. She spent at least as much on it as I have on my bag collection, and that was back in the 80's and 90's. It took a lot of work networking with doll community, identifying the dolls to determine their current value, and finding buyers. Most of the collection sold to one buyer for a small fraction of what my mother paid for those dolls. And I consider myself lucky to have found that one buyer.

I suppose I could judge my mother, but I know she really enjoyed shopping and collecting. If she had known how much work her stuff would be for me after she passed, I think she would have done things differently. My main take away is to let go when something feels more like a burden than a pleasure.

 

[muchstuff]

I know my mother would judge me for my bag collection if she were still alive. I don't think she had much room to judge. Cleaning out her closet full of clothes with tags still on them, and hundreds of shoes still in boxes never worn - she was a hoarder. Granted, everything was clean and well organized. She had the "just in case" mentality.

Then, trying to sell her massive antique doll collection. She spent at least as much on it as I have on my bag collection, and that was back in the 80's and 90's. It took a lot of work networking with doll community, identifying the dolls to determine their current value, and finding buyers. Most of the collection sold to one buyer for a small fraction of what my mother paid for those dolls. And I consider myself lucky to have found that one buyer.

I suppose I could judge my mother, but I know she really enjoyed shopping and collecting. If she had known how much work her stuff would be for me after she passed, I think she would have done things differently. My main take away is to let go when something feels more like a burden than a pleasure.

I've done that with the majority of my glass collection. At least I know my daughters will find joy in my bags!

 

[GoStanford]

My main take away is to let go when something feels more like a burden than a pleasure.

I found this statement very insightful. These are some good reflections in this latest discussion! I mean, we're all on a website called PurseForum for a reason, right? My wish is that I have the time and good judgment to know when to let go of items, and that I do so at a time when I can make the decision for myself and perhaps even generate some joy for others.

In the meantime, I continue to enjoy these accessories.

 

[indiaink]

I just read that article about hoarding/collecting. What a way to screw with the collective. This IS a purse forum, after all. @jbags07 the convo it generated was insightful but I sincerely hope that you feel good about your collection; it’s certainly nobody‘s psycho-babble business what we buy, collect, or hoard (as the case may be). This very forum depends on our purchases, whether we end up ‘hoarding’ or collecting.

One of my former computer clients was a hoarder. She’d send home boxes of dry goods with me; boxes of just any food stuff you can imagine. They were piled high in every corner of every room. Another former client never threw away mail. I found that out when I had to help her find her checkbook in her bedroom, where it was all collected. She had one corner of the bed to sleep on.

That‘s all I got.

 

[Evergreen602]

I just read that article about hoarding/collecting. What a way to screw with the collective. This IS a purse forum, after all. @jbags07 the convo it generated was insightful but I sincerely hope that you feel good about your collection; it’s certainly nobody‘s psycho-babble business what we buy, collect, or hoard (as the case may be). This very forum depends on our purchases, whether we end up ‘hoarding’ or collecting.

One of my former computer clients was a hoarder. She’d send home boxes of dry goods with me; boxes of just any food stuff you can imagine. They were piled high in every corner of every room. Another former client never threw away mail. I found that out when I had to help her find her checkbook in her bedroom, where it was all collected. She had one corner of the bed to sleep on.

That‘s all I got.

I think the intent of the article is to make us consider our shopping / collecting habits. It's not a bad thing if it generates a discussion. However, I find some of the comments after the article judgmental. And yes, I made a comment sticking up for some of us with more than 10 bags. IMO, 10 bags is not even close to hoarding. 10 bags covers the essentials.

Seriously, if you love your bags, have the room and the means to afford your collection, who is anyone else to judge? Go on with your stylish self!

 

[whateve]

Thank you for discussing this with me here, the BV forum is full of such wonderful people
I was feeling triggered by that article but with your help i’ve been able to figure out why, and i am grateful for the support here. My grandmother lived with us growing up, and her grandparents were children during the Potato Famine. That shaped her in many ways, and then she was a young adult during the Great Depression, and that had a big impact on how she lived her life. They saved and saved, rarely spent money. Her lens colored my upbringing, along with 12 years of Catholic school which bred guilt in those days I never connected any of this until all of your comments above helped me to analyze it all. I thank you for that . I will sell the bags that do not work for me, but i will keep the ones that do, and enjoy them….. and add any that spark joy. And enjoy my BV collection @GoStanford - i always felt guilty if a bag was carried once or twice a year, but will always equate now with that Christmas platter which is so wonderful to have and use tyat one day a year. And @muchstuff - i will remind myself with each additional acquisition, — i make the rules for me!

I was also influenced by my parents and grandparents who lived through the Depression. My grandparents stayed frugal their entire lives. I turn bottles over to get the last drop and use every sliver of soap. My husband is the opposite and doesn't see anything wrong with throwing things away when he doesn't want them anymore, even though they could be donated to be enjoyed by someone else. My grandmother was a Catholic married to a Jew so I inherited twice as much guilt!

 

[whateve]

I know my mother would judge me for my bag collection if she were still alive. I don't think she had much room to judge. Cleaning out her closet full of clothes with tags still on them, and hundreds of shoes still in boxes never worn - she was a hoarder. Granted, everything was clean and well organized. She had the "just in case" mentality.

Then, trying to sell her massive antique doll collection. She spent at least as much on it as I have on my bag collection, and that was back in the 80's and 90's. It took a lot of work networking with doll community, identifying the dolls to determine their current value, and finding buyers. Most of the collection sold to one buyer for a small fraction of what my mother paid for those dolls. And I consider myself lucky to have found that one buyer.

I suppose I could judge my mother, but I know she really enjoyed shopping and collecting. If she had known how much work her stuff would be for me after she passed, I think she would have done things differently. My main take away is to let go when something feels more like a burden than a pleasure.

At least you took the time to research their value and find buyers. I'm worried my children will donate all my bags to Goodwill.

 

[Evergreen602]

At least you took the time to research their value and find buyers. I'm worried my children will donate all my bags to Goodwill.

My feeling with the antiques is they need to go to someone who cares about their preservation. I donated my mother's clothes and shoes. We were not the same clothing size, and while some of her shoes fit me, most were high heels neither of us could wear. Hopefully, her clothes and shoes are being worn and enjoyed by others now.

For my own collections, I am keeping a list of selling sources, like Facebook groups for my jadite dishes, our forum for my designer items, resale sites like TRR and Fashionphile, etc. This will go with a list of my collections in a folder with my important documents. I want the people who have to deal with my stuff to have an easier job than I have dealing with my parents' stuff.

 

[lad92510]

Does anyone own the bauletto bag? I’m looking online at the medium in wood and was wondering if anyone had remarks on this bag. Is the wood color similar to the caramel color? Thanks for info!

 

[anniebhu]

This afternoon I visited BV in Sapporo and for the first time in a long time, wanted to buy something. Whilst the prices were good (20 - 25% cheaper than in Hong Kong), I struggled with the practicality and quality. The Jodie I tried was stiff and hard, not like the Venetas, and the corners on the Hop already creased and out of shape from sitting on the shelf.

A bit disappointed.

 

[jbags07]

Sounds like your FIL is bag bullying you. My dad used to do that with me it’s rude and annoying. It may be generational male thing.

Totally agree! My dad is this way too…I’m sorry you had to deal with it too

I know my mother would judge me for my bag collection if she were still alive. I don't think she had much room to judge. Cleaning out her closet full of clothes with tags still on them, and hundreds of shoes still in boxes never worn - she was a hoarder. Granted, everything was clean and well organized. She had the "just in case" mentality.

Then, trying to sell her massive antique doll collection. She spent at least as much on it as I have on my bag collection, and that was back in the 80's and 90's. It took a lot of work networking with doll community, identifying the dolls to determine their current value, and finding buyers. Most of the collection sold to one buyer for a small fraction of what my mother paid for those dolls. And I consider myself lucky to have found that one buyer.

I suppose I could judge my mother, but I know she really enjoyed shopping and collecting. If she had known how much work her stuff would be for me after she passed, I think she would have done things differently. My main take away is to let go when something feels more like a burden than a pleasure.

You have a lot to deal with, downsizing and selling 2 houses its wonderful though that you are trying to find collectors who will love and appreciate your moms stuff, like her dolls, rather then just donate. Except the clothes/shoes — donating is the way to go. I let go of a lot of clothes/shoes our last move that were new/like new, and found a womens shelter, ladies escaping domestic violence and who had nothing but what they left with. If you have more clothing to donate, this is a wonderful option. Some take furniture too, for women/children who need to start over and are set up in apartments. I hope you are getting close to the end, its an emotionally as well as physically taxing experience

Burden vs pleasure — i echo @GoStanford , this is an incredibly insightful statement. And bottom line, we need to remove others perceptions b/c that (in my case at least), greatly influences my perception about my own stuff.

@muchstuff
I've done that with the majority of my glass collection. At least I know my daughters will find joy in my bags!

Its wonderful knowing your DD’s will love and enjoy your bags one day, and b/c you love and enjoy them so much, they will have a part of you with them as a daily loving reminder not that material items can replace memories, but i believe that sentiment exists in special items.

I found this statement very insightful. These are some good reflections in this latest discussion! I mean, we're all on a website called PurseForum for a reason, right? My wish is that I have the time and good judgment to know when to let go of items, and that I do so at a time when I can make the decision for myself and perhaps even generate some joy for others.

In the meantime, I continue to enjoy these accessories.

I agree, this is incredibly insightful - burden vs pleasure! We are here b/c we enjoy bags. Whatever bags we no longer enjoy, let go to people who will. And allow ourselves to enjoy what we have without letting others judgements or perceptions affect that

I just read that article about hoarding/collecting. What a way to screw with the collective. This IS a purse forum, after all. @jbags07 the convo it generated was insightful but I sincerely hope that you feel good about your collection; it’s certainly nobody‘s psycho-babble business what we buy, collect, or hoard (as the case may be). This very forum depends on our purchases, whether we end up ‘hoarding’ or collecting.

One of my former computer clients was a hoarder. She’d send home boxes of dry goods with me; boxes of just any food stuff you can imagine. They were piled high in every corner of every room. Another former client never threw away mail. I found that out when I had to help her find her checkbook in her bedroom, where it was all collected. She had one corner of the bed to sleep on.

That‘s all I got.

You made me laugh, thank you ‘screw with the collective’ lolol. Exactly! We are a collective of bag lovers and buyers. Most of us are always adding, removing, tweaking. Thats our thing! Plus our taste and needs change, and so our bag collections must reflect that. And as u said, this forum depends on our buying and selling of bags.

The insinuation made that having a lot of bags is hoarding rather then collecting, is a matter of opinion. Bless those clients whose homes are filled not a fun way to live. My house is clean and uncluttered, except for a back room where there are still some unpacked boxes from our move, including boxes of vintage bags — most of which ive been selling the last few years. And i have a ‘bag room’ with shelves etc to house all my bags. I just need to get it organized. I still have 30-40 contemporary bags hanging around, and its those and all my vintage bags that overwhelm me and my collection. I’ve tweaked and trimmed my premier collection this year, need to trim maybe 5-10 BV that do not work due to style or color. I think a big take away for me, from all this, is its the bags i do not love but still have that are causing me stress. And the conditioning of my family has made it hard to let go w/o trying to sell (so many things new with tags or used once for an hour). Selling bags lately though, as you all all know, is tricky in this economy. I am so tired of selling on ebay and poshmark (vintage and contemporary - i usually sell premier bags to resellers or on bst groups). I am going to give bags away to friends and family and donate the rest. Except for a couple of vintage Coach and Dooneys, i don’t use my contemporary bags. I need them gone.

I think the intent of the article is to make us consider our shopping / collecting habits. It's not a bad thing if it generates a discussion. However, I find some of the comments after the article judgmental. And yes, I made a comment sticking up for some of us with more than 10 bags. IMO, 10 bags is not even close to hoarding. 10 bags covers the essentials.

Seriously, if you love your bags, have the room and the means to afford your collection, who is anyone else to judge? Go on with your stylish self!

I need to go read the comments, i stopped b/c it gets judgy, like u said. There are comments like this throughout TPF posts too though, lol. Who made them the purse police?! More then 10 bags is hoarding better question is, why do these people feel the need to say that, and to criticize?!
That old quote by Eleanor Roosevelt comes to mind….no one can intimidate you unless u let them.

I was also influenced by my parents and grandparents who lived through the Depression. My grandparents stayed frugal their entire lives. I turn bottles over to get the last drop and use every sliver of soap. My husband is the opposite and doesn't see anything wrong with throwing things away when he doesn't want them anymore, even though they could be donated to be enjoyed by someone else. My grandmother was a Catholic married to a Jew so I inherited twice as much guilt!

My family was the same as yours, and it shaped me a lot too. And My husband is like yours. But, Catholic AND Jewish guilt! Double whammy Bless you!

At least you took the time to research their value and find buyers. I'm worried my children will donate all my bags to Goodwill.

There us someone here on TPF whose avatar says - my fear is when i die my husband will sell my bags for what i told him i paid for them. Eeek! That, and goodwill, are scary ideas for our bags!

 

[jbags07]

This afternoon I visited BV in Sapporo and for the first time in a long time, wanted to buy something. Whilst the prices were good (20 - 25% cheaper than in Hong Kong), I struggled with the practicality and quality. The Jodie I tried was stiff and hard, not like the Venetas, and the corners on the Hop already creased and out of shape from sitting on the shelf.

A bit disappointed.

I’m sorry you did not enjoy your visit to BV. Its disappointing to hear about the stiff Jodies and creased Hops. Were there any bags that felt good to you, quality, color, or style?