I realized the same thing when my mom died. So often, I wanted to share something with her and couldn't. When covid hit, I was relieved that my parents didn't have to deal with it.
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My father is still alive and he has suffered immensely since Mom’s passing. And I now see what a rock my mother was for him. Often I look up at the sky and ask my mother how she managed him for 55 years! I also now see the role my mother played in our family. As my sister said ‘Mom wasn’t the most nurturing. But she led the ship and at least made sure we were all on board.’
Ovarian cancer seems particularly cruel. I lost my friend Janice to it and she was able to battle for years. There were times we thought she might beat it but alas.
Ovarian cancer seems particularly cruel. I lost my friend Janice to it and she was able to battle for years. There were times we thought she might beat it but alas.
My dad passed on Christmas morning 2019. He had a rare disease that was a precursor to leukemia. He became very ill in November 2019, suffered from an infection, kidney failure and his disease progressed into acute leukemia in the few days before he died. If he had managed to overcome the infection, he would have still needed 24 hour care in a nursing home, and dialysis three days per week. He was suffering, and ready to go. As much as I miss him, I also think it was a blessing he never had to experience COVID. Being locked in a nursing home unable to see us would have been torture for him. I hate my mom had to experience COVID too. Her desire to live was too strong to not take precautions, but at the same time she felt like she lost two years of her life.
I know losing my dad was hard for my mother. My mom seemed to have beat cancer by Summer 2019, being placed on a chemo pill for maintenance. Her quality of life went back to normal. She was on that pill for a year before her cancer crept back. However, my dad became very ill and passed not long after she got better. I think the stress of losing my dad, dealing with probate, COVID and the prospect of downsizing was overwhelming to her. I have no doubt that stress played a role in the cancer's return.
My mom was also told she could live for years with ovarian cancer, and I think that gave her enough hope to continue fighting it. The day before she passed was when the oncologist told her they were out of options, and she was at the point where treatment was making her sicker. That is when he talked to her about starting hospice. I think once she knew the fight was over, she let go.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's especially hard when someone dies on a holiday. My mom died on Halloween. That's not as bad as Christmas.
My father refused dialysis. He refused hospice because it was admitting he was terminal but he wouldn't let my mom give up when she was sick. There was a point when she wanted to stop but he convinced her to do another round of chemo. Near the end he wasn't capable of taking care of her because he couldn't lift her. Hospice only came 3 times a week. He put her in a family care home and she died the next day. She just gave up. She had always said she never wanted to be put in a home. It wasn't like a big rest home; it was just a woman taking care of a few patients in her private home. I think my mom felt abandoned when she had to go there. My father lived another two years. My mom always expected she would outlive him. Until she got cancer, she was never sick. He had diabetes and lots of health problems.
I am very sorry you lost your mom. Its difficult at any age, especially to an unrelenting disease that must be battled….sometimes that can define the memories, so work to remember the better days…..you will always miss her, but time does help diminish the pain just a bit. I lost my mom to double breast and bone cancer 30 years ago, and i still miss her everyday. Keep busy, enjoy your new pup (dogs are the best healers!), and enjoy your bags and this forum….these can help take your mind off of the loss as you grieve in the days aheadI have not been on here very much the past few weeks because they have been very difficult. I lost my mom to ovarian cancer almost three weeks ago. I miss her very much and my world has been shattered. With her passing I inherited lots of responsibility. Some of that responsibility is good, though. I'm now dog mom to a sweet, stubborn and beautiful American Eskimo. Because of her, I will need to find a new place to live in Arizona. My 3rd floor apartment with no elevator is not ideal for a 10 year old dog who hates stairs and barks a lot. A house with a yard is in my future, if I can find one in this crazy market.
I've gradually started coming back on the forum to get my mind off things. I'm in my hometown, Dallas, and started doing things with friends again. With my mother being a cancer patient, I was super cautious about going out and being around people, so I usually didn't. Anyway, it was good to see friends and catch up over Tex Mex and margaritas. I needed it more than I knew.
Yesterday during lunch, an old friend and I got on the topic of handbags. Neither of us knew we both loved luxury handbags, except I've seen her carry Prada occasionally. That lunch (and maybe the margaritas) led us to Highland Park Village so we could show each other our favorite non-BV bags. The Dallas BV boutique is at a different shopping center. However, I finally saw DL BV in the wild for the first time. A Cammello Pouch and a Mini Pouch (Almond or another similar neutral). It was a nice change from the typical LV and Chanel I see everywhere in Phoenix and Scottsdale.
Some of you know I recently purchased a hard to find bag on my wish list - the Espresso Metallic Intrecciato Cervo Baseball Hobo. I have not yet seen it in person. It was delivered to my office after I had to fly to Dallas. My boyfriend just mailed it to me, so hopefully I will still have time to return it if does not meet expectation. I will share photos soon.
Thanks to everyone for continuing the BV conversations. It has provided some nice carefree reading at the end of some difficult days.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that with both your parents.
My dad was like yours towards the end. He refused hospice, yet was okay with dying. However, in his mind, hospice was giving up. He held out for the possibility of consulting one of his specialists the day after Christmas. His main wish was to no longer suffer, and he decided to proceed with comfort care. He knew the amount of pain medication needed could stop his breathing, but was okay with that. I left him on Christmas Eve right after they administered that heavier does of pain medication. He was drifting off to sleep and it was just before midnight. He was gone an hour and a half later. He always loved Christmas, so it was hard losing him on that day. However, I was also relieved he was no longer suffering and stuck in a hospital on his favorite holiday. It was probably for the best.
I'm so sorry you lost your mom to cancer also. It's just the worst.I am very sorry you lost your mom. Its difficult at any age, especially to an unrelenting disease that must be battled….sometimes that can define the memories, so work to remember the better days…..you will always miss her, but time does help diminish the pain just a bit. I lost my mom to double breast and bone cancer 30 years ago, and i still miss her everyday. Keep busy, enjoy your new pup (dogs are the best healers!), and enjoy your bags and this forum….these can help take your mind off of the loss as you grieve in the days ahead
This forum is a help. I know this is not a lighthearted topic, and I appreciate all the kind responses.
Speaking of the distraction of bags, I'm still waiting for my Espresso Metallic Cervo Intrecciato Baseball Hobo to arrive from my home in Arizona. Boyfriend had to choose the cheapest and slowest shipping! USPS is giving it a tour of the country right now. They have two hours left before the package is late. Oh well...
Once I had a package go to Puerto Rico twice before it ended up back on the mainland!
Thank you
And this forum is a wonderful place to connect with others, and not just in regard to our bag tales. Getting support, especially in the early days, is important. So talk away as neededCrossing fingers the Cervo arrives soon, it will be a welcome distraction. I’ve had several packages be very delayed the past week or so, so its no surprise yours is taking its time! I just got a lanyard yesterday tyat took over a month to get here from Australia lol. Worth the wait tho! Please share pix when the Cervo does arrive! A pic of your new pup too. I think most of us here are dog lovers.
A bit of happy news - my new to me Espresso Metallic Cervo Intrecciato Baseball Hobo arrived tonight, and she is a beauty! I'll take pictures when I can capture her in good light.
Speaking of beauties, here is my baby girl.
Speaking of beauties, here is my baby girl.
She is gorgeous! What a fluffballA bit of happy news - my new to me Espresso Metallic Cervo Intrecciato Baseball Hobo arrived tonight, and she is a beauty! I'll take pictures when I can capture her in good light.
Speaking of beauties, here is my baby girl.
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she has a very sweet face too. She will bring you much comfort and much joy.
Hello! I bought a BV Bella Tote last night. I found this on spotted fashion which says it can be converted to a single shoulder strap. Does anyone here own the Bella and can share how to convert it? I tried to google and you tube but didn’t have much luck. Thank you!
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I believe you just pull the strap tight against one side and that gives you a longer strap that you can then use as a shoulder strap. You might have to fit the 'ears' through the holes so they go through.Hello! I bought a BV Bella Tote last night. I found this on spotted fashion which says it can be converted to a single shoulder strap. Does anyone here own the Bella and can share how to convert it? I tried to google and you tube but didn’t have much luck. Thank you!
i will chime in with my sad story, since we are on this topic, i lost my Dad in December, just a sudden heart attack.
and that's why i've been a bit MIA, if anyone noticed
and as i started slowly getting back to normal routine, my Mom got covid and is now in ICU at the moment.
Fighting, but she's on and off, and needs the oxygen mask, and Docs don't give any forecast, saying just need to monitor the dynamics.
She's an avid anti-vaxxer, which makes me feel mixed feelings, on one hand that's what one ends up with for being stubborn and denying the obvious reasons, on the other hand it's just too much to handle for a span of 3 months...
i find the salvation in hard work, literally 24/7, i keep my head busy with work stuff, otherwise i'd have gone insane
so frustrated, and even sometime mad at her, for being so careless (to put it gently) to reject the vaccine while she has diabetis, yet feel very sad for all this happening to us
i'm still using my lovely bags, just because i keep myself so busy, i just forget to take pics
and that's why i've been a bit MIA, if anyone noticed
and as i started slowly getting back to normal routine, my Mom got covid and is now in ICU at the moment.
Fighting, but she's on and off, and needs the oxygen mask, and Docs don't give any forecast, saying just need to monitor the dynamics.
She's an avid anti-vaxxer, which makes me feel mixed feelings, on one hand that's what one ends up with for being stubborn and denying the obvious reasons, on the other hand it's just too much to handle for a span of 3 months...
i find the salvation in hard work, literally 24/7, i keep my head busy with work stuff, otherwise i'd have gone insane
so frustrated, and even sometime mad at her, for being so careless (to put it gently) to reject the vaccine while she has diabetis, yet feel very sad for all this happening to us
i'm still using my lovely bags, just because i keep myself so busy, i just forget to take pics