Maintaining an H relationship

[papertiger]

Please focus on the title of this thread rather than each other, TY

If you find it very hard to ignore certain people, please feel free in adding them to your 'Ignore' list.

For advice on how to obtain a B/K/C please go to the reading room in the Reading Room The Newbie's HOW DO I GET A BIRKIN (or other bag) Reading Room

For advice on how to shop at your local store please do a search in Hermes Shopping sub-forum and look for your store/region/country.

 

[jimmyshoogirl]

Lol! You don’t have to, my Lovely! You are the essence of longevity, patience and class Another one of my and @880 secrets, we never communicate our wishlist until the SA specifically asks, in person, on the spot. My response is typically Surprise me or UM, something green? How about Yellow or a Filipino looking bag. So when I said a Filipino looking bag, my SA interpreted that to mean the TropicAl Faubourg, which I had never seen before and exceeded all my expectations. Not having a wishlist has worked out for me really well.

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Aww thanks! I have learned so much by reading your and @880 posts along with others! I’m just sitting back like a little kid sister waiting for the day I can grow up to be like you all!

Thank you to all of you experienced H’ers that share your experiences. As a newbie I read some of the newbie posts and cringe. I can’t think of ANY area in my life where it’s ok to bully someone into purchasing anything. It’s never ok to say “x got this why can’t I.” That type of behavior lets me know that it’s not about building a relationship it’s about trying to get what they want immediately without any regards to the SA or the brand itself!

This may be an unpopular opinion but confidence is missing also for some shoppers. The amount of times I’ve seen “is my SA ghosting me?” is shocking! Sitting by the phone, waiting for someone to call for weeks without trying to call the store or going in is bizarre! If the SA is not responding and don’t want to work with you move on! The store didn’t close down, did it?! Another thing is being afraid to say no to a bag! It’s ok to say no! It’s best to avoid the feelings of regret than saying yes to a bag that you don’t want. This should go without saying but the bags are not cheap and just spending on something you don’t want is unnecessary.

Recently I’m starting to move away from the wishlist thing after my SA brought my wishlist up to me recently. As @880 mentioned earlier my SA is now offering me items that she thinks are comparable to what I want because she’s also wanting me to get something at this point! I’ve realized that I have to let the bags come to me lol. I don’t choose the bags, they choose me! My SA knows that there are two particular bags that I really want so we’ve decided that I should take whatever bags she offer that I like and figure out what to do (read: hound the manager lol) when/if the two I really want come in if I’ve reached my quota! At this point any bag that comes in an orange box I’m open to looking at lol

 

[FaubourgTropical]

confidence is missing also for some shoppers.

Also, this!

ETA: to bring this back to the topic, we know so much more about the technicalities of Hermes here and it’s easy to drown in them. But SAs are not necessarily so. Even long-time, experienced SAs. So to hound them on a specific shade of pink, or grey, or green and getting frustrated when it’s not coming is perhaps also not a good relationship building technique. IMO.

 

[A74]

May I butt into this discussion as a lurker to the thread but as a long time shopper at Hermes?

I don’t have a wishlist. Sure, I may occasionally say that I’m looking for a new “small bag, pop of color” or “large bag for work travel”, but that’s it. And I don’t mention it more than once (mostly because I forget or because I shop other brands and sometimes find what I want somewhere else). I’ve turned down desirable (to others) bags. I’m primarily a RTW client though I dabble in other departments. In fact, my SA often remarks that I don’t ask for anything and that I’m kind. I get the feeling she has some high-maintenance clients.

I have a great SA that knows my style and knows my taste. So she recommends things from all departments. I very rarely send her pictures or ask for anything specific. I simply make an appointment from time to time saying I’d like a few new things or that I’m bored and just want to shop! When there is just one thing that is very specific that I want (a scarf, a pair of shoes, a piece of clothing or jewelry that I know I don’t need to try on), I pay remotely and the store ships it to me - I don’t bother coming in unless there are multiple things that my SA is recommending. As a result, I have an easy relationship with my store and I’ve built a great wardrobe and a great collection of bags (quota and non quota). My SA is typically promptly responsive, partly because I think she is good at her job and partly because I think I am a low-maintenance client. (It’s shopping for unnecessary luxuries - it’s not serious). I should also say that I don’t count my spend in between bags or what I spend in shopping generally, because ignorance is bliss. It is absolutely multiples of what a typical QB costs though - of that I am sure!

I will echo others here who say that if you are primarily in this for a QB, absolutely shop resale. In-store shopping is only fun if you don’t have a wishlist. And if you do have a firm wishlist and the goal is the QB, the transactional and stressful nature of the shopping takes away from the whole point of luxury shopping, which is about the experience really. Before the Hermes aesthetic was my style and my budget, I only dabbled with the brand with a scarf or an enamel bracelet from time to time. I bought a QB at a reputable consignment shop when I was financially ready - when I saw it, I knew it was the one and it was within my budget. At the time, I would not have gotten that bag from the boutique, but I loved it. Similarly, I have a friend that is a Dior and Chanel RTW aficionado. The only things from Hermes she likes are silk scarves and Birkins. So she buys scarves in whatever boutique she happens to walk into and buys Birkins from reputable resellers. She loves it - they send her pictures and videos and she decides whether she loves it or will pass.

Be true to yourself and have fun shopping!

 

[880]

if you do have a firm wishlist and the goal is the QB, the transactional and stressful nature of the shopping takes away from the whole point of luxury shopping, which is about the experience really.

Love your entire post, but this sums up succinctly what I wanted to say in thousands of words (but did not lol)
hope to read more of your posts on the forum

@jimmyshoogirl , by now you are an experienced TPFer lol; you aren’t a newbie

 

[je m'adore~]

Hi everyone, I have posted on this thread before that my SA has moved to another location after being promoted. She told me I would still be able to shop with her (I am a remote client) however since moving she has not been as responsive and weeks have gone by without any response about items I had requested. I have tried to be patient but I have a feeling she is too busy to continue to work with me and just won’t admit it.

Do you think it would be a good idea to ask something along the lines of “ I know you are very busy and I enjoy working with you but do you think you have time to continue to work with me?”

I don’t want to offend her or ruin the relationship but I also feel like I am already not getting priority as a remote shopper (which I totally understand) and I am grateful that I have been able to buy wonderful pieces throughout the years. I also worry about having to restart especially since I feel like my prespend will go to waste (I have not received any qb offers in over two years). While I only buy what I wear and like I would like to foster a relationship where I would at least be considered for a qb even if I cannot come into the store often.

Thank you in advance!

 

[880]

Hi everyone, I have posted on this thread before that my SA has moved to another location after being promoted. She told me I would still be able to shop with her (I am a remote client) however since moving she has not been as responsive and weeks have gone by without any response about items I had requested. I have tried to be patient but I have a feeling she is too busy to continue to work with me and just won’t admit it.

Do you think it would be a good idea to ask something along the lines of “ I know you are very busy and I enjoy working with you but do you think you have time to continue to work with me?”

I don’t want to offend her or ruin the relationship but I also feel like I am already not getting priority as a remote shopper (which I totally understand) and I am grateful that I have been able to buy wonderful pieces throughout the years. I also worry about having to restart especially since I feel like my prespend will go to waste (I have not received any qb offers in over two years). While I only buy what I wear and like I would like to foster a relationship where I would at least be considered for a qb even if I cannot come into the store often.

Thank you in advance!

Any way you can have this conversation in person with her? Post Covid, I get the strong impression, in those words, that SAs are required to prioritize in person clients and transactions and not given any time to go through texts at all. I just don’t know how you would even start a new relationship without in person interactionm nor is it certain that a new SA would be any better. . . unless your spend multiple is extremely high. Even then, competition is stiff, and a client that comes in with similar spend would be favored over someone remote. If I were in your position, and I really could not make it into the store, I might simply shop on line and choose QBs from well priced, authenticated reseller. I would not wish to wait for years indefinitely

ETA: if the items you want are extremely popular like shoes or select RTW, your SA may have a hard time sourcing them even for in person clients. The boutiques have purchased limited quantities this year.

 

[Bdbunny]

Apologies in advance for the length, but given some people ask how I got my Paris SA and the relationship, and thisIS the relationship thread, I thought I’d describe the first two meets.

My recollection of the first two 15 minute, 15 sentence conversations that helped my FSH SA and me form an ongoing relationship. I do NOT say, I want blah, blah, blah, specs, bc I actually don’t know what I want. (if I did, I would have no problem saying, I’ve dreamt of X for Y years) NY SA knew about my appt, and was waiting to hear bc I wasn’t sure what I wanted) this is typical of all of my SA interactions (both appointments, including waiting/paying/trying on time, together took less than 1.5 hour)

FSH SA: what bag are you thinking of.
me: not sure, I usually focus on RTW. Every few years I switch between 6Bs and 5Ks, this year being K
SA: We’ll do bag first, then other stuff. Either B or K, size?
me: traditionally 30/28, but since Covid, I only carry a few things and don’t like a lot of weight
SA: 25K or less, color, HW?
me: [gesturing at what I’m wearing], medium to light neutrals bc I don’t wear my black BK much,
usually phw. I wear gold jewelry, but don’t want to be matchy matchy

Leaves and comes back after 15 minutes:
SA: I couldn’t find anything in medium to light neutrals, but I saw something that would go with what uoi are wearing:
25K, bleu orage, ghw. It’s kind of neutral gray, and even though it’s ghw, GHW works with this color. You do wear gold jewelry. Shrugs

Me: it’s gorgeous and I love the color, but do you mind if I text my NYC SA? Not sure that I will wear GHW
NY SA: texts back You will with Bleu Orage. GET IT.
DH: I have him on the phone , here
NY SA: GET IT, GET IT, now we can work on a 25B

Me: thank you for choosing it for me ! Yes! I love it. It’s my first 25 K
SA: so glad. . . . I don’t have time to pull RTW in your size today, because _____ issue. can you come first thing tomorrow? medium to dark neutrals, skirt, pants, dress, jackets? In 38?
me: yes, thanks, currently looking for skirts, dresses, jackets, no pants bc I’m trying to diet back into 38 pants.
So, 38-40. Everything in my closet is navy, taupe, black, gray.
SA: let me take your info; I can sent to your hotel; I will have a rack waiting tomorrow bc there isn’t much here in yur size.

NEXT DAY: (I’m wearing the bag in)

Me: Hi, how are you? Is __ issue resolved? I LOVE the bag. The HW works
SA: yes thanks, ____. The bag looks great. I have a rack waiting (only five items bc we’re running low)
Me: thanks. . . Tries on everything in 15 minutes
Me: these two didn’t work, these three did. Love them. I didn’t see these in NY
SA: we have a different buy, but Paris tends to get a lot.
Me: can I wear one to lunch and have my stuff delivered with the others.
SA: sadly we cannot deliver your personal items, but I can deliver all three new ones
Me: thank you again for the bag and dresses you picked, I love everything
SA: my pleasure, glad I found something that you love
SA to DH: they had been chatting while i tried on stuff. You have my info; contact me when you
have your exact dates for coming back in the fall
SA to me: I gave yur DH my info. You should contact me on what’sapp.
Me: I don’t have WhatsApp. Can I email
Sa: lol, I will check email.


Me to DH later: You got her info! we’re coming back in the Fall?
DH : we are now.

note: I always shoot a quick sentence of thanks to everyone (not just premier luxury shopping)
For premier luxury shopping, I also add an action shot with the item
I do not get twisted out of shape if all I get back is an emoticon (Or even no response)
I just want them to know that I appreciate their curation and im using what they chose.

NY SA delivered a 25 sellier gold B, PHW, (I did not ask for that either) a few months later, BUT before my second trip to Paris.

ETA: DH gets SAs info, IDKH. He is the client profile in almost all premier luxury in every city, except chanel 57, where apparently they have had my info from many years ago. I was very nervous in the first appt, and I think I also literally blurted out that my NY SA suggested I ask for a cargo or something unobtainable, but I forget when or how exactly I said that. I do know i felt like a complete idiot after the words came out, and she said not available.

I love this!! "We are now." LMAO.

I like to send a follow up note to my SAs too, especially when I get something extra special or even a cute piece of RTW. I will send them an outfit of the day pic or an action shot. I think they appreciate seeing that we love what we get from them. I also sometimes ask them to help me accessorize something I got from them, like what belt do you think would be best with this dress etc.

Speaking of hubbies, mine has a totally different communication style than I do. As in not as neurotic as I am! When he's in charge of communicating with our SA it usually goes like this.

Me: Honey, don't you think you should send SA another email about _____? It's been exactly 4.5 days and we haven't heard back.

DH: No.

Me: Do you think the email got lost? Why do you think he hasn't gotten back to us? Don't you think you should follow up?

DH: No.

And of course we hear back shortly and everything is fine.

 

[je m'adore~]

Any way you can have this conversation in person with her? Post Covid, I get the strong impression, in those words, that SAs are required to prioritize in person clients and transactions and not given any time to go through texts at all. I just don’t know how you would even start a new relationship without in person interactionm nor is it certain that a new SA would be any better. . . unless your spend multiple is extremely high. Even then, competition is stiff, and a client that comes in with similar spend would be favored over someone remote. If I were in your position, and I really could not make it into the store, I might simply shop on line and choose QBs from well priced, authenticated reseller. I would not wish to wait for years indefinitely

ETA: if the items you want are extremely popular like shoes or select RTW, your SA may have a hard time sourcing them even for in person clients. The boutiques have purchased limited quantities this year.

Thank you for your response. Over the past year prior to the move, my SA was able to get me multiple popular items like chypres, evelyne tpm, bride a brac, avalon blanket so I am so grateful for still being able to purchase these items. I enjoy working with them and the new store is actually a better location for me to visit a few times a year but yes I understand competition is high everywhere. I never thought to go the reseller route because I genuinely enjoy the brand and buy different metiers I just figured over time I would be offered bags consistently so it wouldn’t be an issue.

I just feel like I’m at a crossroads and do not know what to do.

 

[Bdbunny]

Thank you for your response. Over the past year prior to the move, my SA was able to get me multiple popular items like chypres, evelyne tpm, bride a brac, avalon blanket so I am so grateful for still being able to purchase these items. I enjoy working with them and the new store is actually a better location for me to visit a few times a year but yes I understand competition is high everywhere. I never thought to go the reseller route because I genuinely enjoy the brand and buy different metiers I just figured over time I would be offered bags consistently so it wouldn’t be an issue.

I just feel like I’m at a crossroads and do not know what to do.

I have had FIVE SAs/SM either get fired/resign/get transferred in the last year alone! So I understand how upsetting it can be, especially when you genuinely form a nice relationship with someone and have to start over. (outside of purchase history.)

You said the new store is actually a better location for you to visit a few times a year... are you able to make a visit to the store and catch up with your SA? This may re-enforce your relationship. I have a long distance boutique and I have a great relationship with my SA there. I order remote but also try to visit whenever I am in town. It's great because he usually tries to have a bag (not always a Birkin or Kelly) for me every time I visit, since it's every 2-3 months or so. I think if I were local and went to the store every week, obviously he would not have a bag for me every week! So it may actually work in your favor to make 3-4 visits a year to see your SA, and order remote in the meantime, especially if you have a good relationship with her, and it sounds like you do.

 

[Midge Maisel]

May I butt into this discussion as a lurker to the thread but as a long time shopper at Hermes?

I don’t have a wishlist. Sure, I may occasionally say that I’m looking for a new “small bag, pop of color” or “large bag for work travel”, but that’s it. And I don’t mention it more than once (mostly because I forget or because I shop other brands and sometimes find what I want somewhere else). I’ve turned down desirable (to others) bags. I’m primarily a RTW client though I dabble in other departments. In fact, my SA often remarks that I don’t ask for anything and that I’m kind. I get the feeling she has some high-maintenance clients.

I have a great SA that knows my style and knows my taste. So she recommends things from all departments. I very rarely send her pictures or ask for anything specific. I simply make an appointment from time to time saying I’d like a few new things or that I’m bored and just want to shop! When there is just one thing that is very specific that I want (a scarf, a pair of shoes, a piece of clothing or jewelry that I know I don’t need to try on), I pay remotely and the store ships it to me - I don’t bother coming in unless there are multiple things that my SA is recommending. As a result, I have an easy relationship with my store and I’ve built a great wardrobe and a great collection of bags (quota and non quota). My SA is typically promptly responsive, partly because I think she is good at her job and partly because I think I am a low-maintenance client. (It’s shopping for unnecessary luxuries - it’s not serious). I should also say that I don’t count my spend in between bags or what I spend in shopping generally, because ignorance is bliss. It is absolutely multiples of what a typical QB costs though - of that I am sure!

I will echo others here who say that if you are primarily in this for a QB, absolutely shop resale. In-store shopping is only fun if you don’t have a wishlist. And if you do have a firm wishlist and the goal is the QB, the transactional and stressful nature of the shopping takes away from the whole point of luxury shopping, which is about the experience really. Before the Hermes aesthetic was my style and my budget, I only dabbled with the brand with a scarf or an enamel bracelet from time to time. I bought a QB at a reputable consignment shop when I was financially ready - when I saw it, I knew it was the one and it was within my budget. At the time, I would not have gotten that bag from the boutique, but I loved it. Similarly, I have a friend that is a Dior and Chanel RTW aficionado. The only things from Hermes she likes are silk scarves and Birkins. So she buys scarves in whatever boutique she happens to walk into and buys Birkins from reputable resellers. She loves it - they send her pictures and videos and she decides whether she loves it or will pass.

Be true to yourself and have fun shopping!

I feel like this is the way to go. As a very new client (I began shopping in June), I spent a lot of time evaluating my feelings on resale vs. playing the game. I looked around the resale market and saw a lot of bags I liked, but I started looking at the H website and realized that I liked more than just the bags. Now, I'm glad that I've been able to add some really well-made H goodies to my wardrobe while I await my QB.

I also agree re: wishlist. I don't have one, either. When I felt the time was right (at about 1.5:1 spend), I told my SA what I wanted, and now, my dream bag is on my SA's radar. But that hasn't changed my shopping habits. I just buy what I like (or would like to give as a gift) when I want, and when I get the call to come pick up a bag, I'll be there! Until then, I'm enjoying the entire process. If you can't do that, go the reseller route.

 

[tinkerbell68]

Aww thanks! I have learned so much by reading your and @880 posts along with others! I’m just sitting back like a little kid sister waiting for the day I can grow up to be like you all!

Thank you to all of you experienced H’ers that share your experiences. As a newbie I read some of the newbie posts and cringe. I can’t think of ANY area in my life where it’s ok to bully someone into purchasing anything. It’s never ok to say “x got this why can’t I.” That type of behavior lets me know that it’s not about building a relationship it’s about trying to get what they want immediately without any regards to the SA or the brand itself!

This may be an unpopular opinion but confidence is missing also for some shoppers. The amount of times I’ve seen “is my SA ghosting me?” is shocking! Sitting by the phone, waiting for someone to call for weeks without trying to call the store or going in is bizarre! If the SA is not responding and don’t want to work with you move on! The store didn’t close down, did it?! Another thing is being afraid to say no to a bag! It’s ok to say no! It’s best to avoid the feelings of regret than saying yes to a bag that you don’t want. This should go without saying but the bags are not cheap and just spending on something you don’t want is unnecessary.

Recently I’m starting to move away from the wishlist thing after my SA brought my wishlist up to me recently. As @880 mentioned earlier my SA is now offering me items that she thinks are comparable to what I want because she’s also wanting me to get something at this point! I’ve realized that I have to let the bags come to me lol. I don’t choose the bags, they choose me! My SA knows that there are two particular bags that I really want so we’ve decided that I should take whatever bags she offer that I like and figure out what to do (read: hound the manager lol) when/if the two I really want come in if I’ve reached my quota! At this point any bag that comes in an orange box I’m open to looking at lol

I was thinking of writing a tome, mostly thanking all those tPFers who so generously share their experience and advice about how to maintain a relationship with H, and then I read your post and thought I'd just quote a sentence or two but ended up finding too much good info! Ditto to most of what you've written @jimmyshoogirl
I also think we may both have the same particular bag high on our list

 

[jimmyshoogirl]

I was thinking of writing a tome, mostly thanking all those tPFers who so generously share their experience and advice about how to maintain a relationship with H, and then I read your post and thought I'd just quote a sentence or two but ended up finding too much good info! Ditto to most of what you've written @jimmyshoogirl
I also think we may both have the same particular bag high on our list

Hehe iirc yes we do! May we both get it soon!

 

[880]

I love this!! "We are now." LMAO.

I like to send a follow up note to my SAs too, especially when I get something extra special or even a cute piece of RTW. I will send them an outfit of the day pic or an action shot. I think they appreciate seeing that we love what we get from them. I also sometimes ask them to help me accessorize something I got from them, like what belt do you think would be best with this dress etc.

Speaking of hubbies, mine has a totally different communication style than I do. As in not as neurotic as I am! When he's in charge of communicating with our SA it usually goes like this.

Me: Honey, don't you think you should send SA another email about _____? It's been exactly 4.5 days and we haven't heard back.

DH: No.

Me: Do you think the email got lost? Why do you think he hasn't gotten back to us? Don't you think you should follow up?

DH: No.

And of course we hear back shortly and everything is fine.

My DH is like that too
I asked how do you know when to ask for the appt.
he says she told me when to do it
I say but what if shes not available
he says then she will let me know
lol
PS my SA thinks it’s bizarre if my face is covered for an action shot.
he responded once by sending me a selfie pic of himself with his face covered and a laughing emoticon

@tinkerbell68 , you think of writing a tome of thanks. I almost think we could collectively write an HBS business school case on the luxury retail experience seen through the lens of the H SA relationship. Sadly H would have to approve every step As well as the final document lol

 

[jimmyshoogirl]

Love your entire post, but this sums up succinctly what I wanted to say in thousands of words (but did not lol)
hope to read more of your posts on the forum

@jimmyshoogirl , by now you are an experienced TPFer lol; you aren’t a newbie

Haha I meant I newbie to H! I’m an old-head around these parts I guess being an old head on tpf also has taught me to read around and learn the lay of the land before just jumping in! The beauty of this forum gives us a heads up, if only we read all of the useful info!

 

[jimmyshoogirl]

PS my SA thinks it’s bizarre if my face is covered for an action shot.
he responded once by sending me a selfie pic of himself with his face covered and a laughing emoticon

Seriously you sending an action shot with your face covered to an SA that sees you in person is pretty freaking funny! I’m sure those are pics that you use on here but still it’s funny and so is his response