How do i tell my cousin she carries fakes???

#31
WHY do you want to tell her? Because it drives YOU crazy? It's not your "job" to educate her about designer bags. It can only cause harm & awkwardness & ill feelings etc. You've already *tried* to tell her and she outright REJECTED that kind of input. Are you just so very, very anxious to be "right"? Why does it bother you so much?
 
#32
decodelighted said:
WHY do you want to tell her? Because it drives YOU crazy? It's not your "job" to educate her about designer bags. It can only cause harm & awkwardness & ill feelings etc. You've already *tried* to tell her and she outright REJECTED that kind of input. Are you just so very, very anxious to be "right"? Why does it bother you so much?
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hmm...
if a person is knowingly carrying around a fake, and doesn't care, then neither do i.
however, if i was in the same situation (with someone who couldn't take hints), i would feel obligated to tell them that it's fake. fake bags are illegal, plain and simple. and that would be my sole reason for telling someone, especially since this cousin is giving them out as gifts, etc.
telling her can certainly be done in a way to foster negative feelings..but it can also be done positively (hey, your bag isn't quite real- so why don't we get you a piece of the real deal...that sort of thing. you acknowledge it is fake, but offer a solution- not just leave her purseless).
and i certainly do not think it's a matter of being "right"- that sort of behavior is when you are arguing different political views with friends or something, and no one wants to be wrong. this is entirely different. if i were being lied to, i would hope my friends and family would tell me (in a loving way, of course).
in the end, it comes down to this: fake bags take away value from the authentic. as a member of tpf, who is adamently against fakes, shouldn't a member have some sort of "obligation" to inform some people of inauthenticity (of course, don't go up to every person on the street who has a fake. be reasonable). and i certainly DO think we should educate...who knows, maybe this girl will turn into a lv lover? :graucho:
point is...it shouldn't be a bother to ANYBODY but, rather, a concern. like i said, fakes are illegal. and it's not about being RIGHT, it's about doing the RIGHT THING, for that person (every person is different...i have friends who i can make fun of their fake bags...and other friends who would break down in tears and hate me if i said anything against them. KNOW the person you're talking to. if they can't handle it, then leave it alone. pick your fights!)
/rant.
 
#34
ack, if that was my cousin, I wouldn't care if she wore fakes, but i'd definitely care if she thought the fakes were authentic to the point she started giving me and other family members fake bags!! I'd rather take a starbucks giftcard over that....lol
I would correct her, but I'm a very "keep it real" type of gal... I can't sugar coat the truth LOL
good luck talking to your cousin!! I feel people outta be 100% truthful w/ family. u can't let her go out like that.
 
#35
BUYING fake bags may be illegal ... but CARRYING them is not illegal ... especially if you don't even know they ARE fakes. The cousin in question isn't BUYING or SELLING fake bags. She's enjoying gifts from her (sleazy) boyfriend. Rain. Parade. No?
 
#36
I wouldn't harp on it. You know her better than we do since we don't know her at all. If she is naive (an probably sensitive) it would be insensitive to tell her her bags are fake and imply her BF is scum. If he is a creep she will realize this in his behavior and not in whether or not her bags are real. Perhaps she does know they are fake deep down but loves her BF and doesn't care to place him in a bad light to her family.

Authenticity is an issue you have. Don't make it hers as well. Family is more important than a fake bag. Insisting on this issue could come back and bite you in the you-know-where. Just my 2 cents.;)
 
#37
I think it depends on your relationship with your cousin. I have cousins with whom I won't hesitate to say so. I have cousins whom I would just shut up and let her figure it out herself someday.
 
#39
Kimmi said:
Eeeek! I don't know...it is your cousin and if she is in love with this guy, unfortuately if you "put him down" via the bags she may take it out on you...then family gatherings won't be too fun for a while. That is a hard call but you know her better than us so...good luck. On a side note (and I really hope my cousin is not lurking here somewhere, if so I am seriously hideously sorry for telling this story :shame: )at our last family thing see my cousin walking up to the door with an LV speedy 30 with honey handles. From a distance my mom and me say "wow, blank got a speedy" then in a sec we see little gold feet on the speedy...:wtf: ...I would NEVER have said anything because I love her and I am not going to call her out on it. My mom however says "Kimmi has the same bag, where did you get yours?" My cousin is the sweetest thing on earth, stammers a bit and says it is a fake that cost her $40 dollars. BAAAD fake BTW...but then she says that my Auntie told her not to tell us!:sneaky: Because I of course, sitting there with the same bag half the women in my other side of the family have...would not notice Louis Vuitton's newest edition of FEET on the speedy. Oh, and a $40 fake is really bad (again if you see this I am mortified and sorry).
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I saw a girl on the elevator with one of these Speedys with feet :lol:
I couldn't stop looking at it, and she was looking at me smiling, I think she thought I was admiring her bag :lol:
 
#40
Did you decide to say anything more to her yet?

I wouldn't say anything. If it is you vs. the boyfriend she someday hopes to marry you will lose. If they break up you can talk to her about it then.
 
#41
decodelighted said:
BUYING fake bags may be illegal ... but CARRYING them is not illegal ... especially if you don't even know they ARE fakes. The cousin in question isn't BUYING or SELLING fake bags. She's enjoying gifts from her (sleazy) boyfriend. Rain. Parade. No?
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ITA, I am not into ruining others joy, even if it is misguided ;)
 
#42
I'd tell her, but we're open in my family. Also I'd be super annoyed if she's giving them away to other family members pretending that they're real. Why should some poor grannie be embarred if someone calls her out for carrying a fake? Sounds like she's in deep denial about this jerk.
 
#43
I wouldn't be surprised if your cousin knows they are fakes but doesn't care, she should know her boyfriends salary and even if the bags are so called "irregular" I doubt they would just hand them over to employees to take home. She has to know somethings not quite right :confused1:
 
#44
Tylisa said:
I wouldn't be surprised if your cousin knows they are fakes but doesn't care, she should know her boyfriends salary and even if the bags are so called "irregular" I doubt they would just hand them over to employees to take home. She has to know somethings not quite right :confused1:
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I agree. And I don't think the bf is such a scum bag for trying to make her happy. I'm sure she knows they're fake, and she could just say, "no thanks." Even though I buy handbags in the $900 - $1,000 range I could never expect anyone else to buy a bag for THAT much for me.

I say leave it alone.
 
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