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#14,041
Mindi B said:
Catsinthebag, isn't there maybe a little similarity between Ashley Nell Tipton declaring herself "the fat girl" (when, let's face it, that's how most people see her--she might as well embrace it) and your telling us your (small) size and the fact that you look younger than your age? Your slenderness and youthful appearance are fun and wonderful and worth enjoying, but isn't the real difference between my saying, "Good for you, catsinthebag, I bet you look amazing" and saying, "Negative, fat-focused reactions are ANT's fault, since she drew attention to her size" a function of WHAT size is being discussed?
And as for "dressing to accentuate her size": I totally understand what you mean and I don't disagree, but I do find it interesting that we all sort of automatically assume that she shouldn't. Why shouldn't she? Smaller women dress to accentuate THEIR size. . . And in fact, right now oversized looks are in, so sample size women are chic for wearing garments that make them look larger than they are, but plus-sized women are slovenly for NOT dressing to look smaller than they are?
I am truly not picking a fight with you--You didn't say anything wrong. I am just unpacking the way our culture thinks--myself included. I find it interesting and sort of insidious.
Hope this doesn't come across as judgmental or preachy. I am just pondering out loud and I am by NO means immune to societal attitudes. Quite the opposite.
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Hi Mindi,

I truly did not mean to toot my own horn or say how wonderful I look -- most days, I look in the mirror with at best a sigh and at worst a ton of self-judgment. The point I was trying to make (and doing a poor job of it) is that if it's difficult for me to find clothes when I'm a size stores tend to carry, how hard must it be for someone who is a size 16?

Funny thing is, the world I lived in as a kid/teenager was gymnastics. I was a 5'6", broad-shouldered giant in a world of girls who were all tiny compared to me. So regardless of my actual size, I still see myself as a large person. How screwed up is that!

I hear what you're saying about how our culture thinks. I do see myself falling into that. On the one hand, we should not discriminate. On the other, we are facing a national health crisis because of the obesity epidemic. The number of overweight children we see now is astounding. But how can we talk about health when everyone is so hypersensitive to being discriminatory or discriminated against?

Something is really wrong with our culture, that is for sure. How fashion designers stay in business is beyond me, when there are simply not enough 20-year-old, 6-foot-tall ectomorphs to buy all their clothes. There doesn't seem to be a middle ground, an "average," anymore. Everyone on TV and in the movies is either plus-size or skinny. And that's before we get to the fact that no one is allowed to have a wrinkle. Are we lucky, at a certain age, to have enough fat in our butts to be able to inject it into our faces? Only half kidding here. It's a warped world, that's for sure.
 
#14,042
catsinthebag, you're so right about the rampant size-ism AND age-ism in our culture, and it is chiefly directed against women. Would a woman of Harrison Ford's age still be cast as a lead? Would a female director the age of Clint Eastwood be trusted to helm a major motion picture? Actress Melissa McCarthy was called "a female hippo" by idiot critic Rex Reed. Were male comedic actors like John Belushi, John Candy, Chris Farley pilloried for being big? Nooooo. Look at the trouble even wonderful actresses like Meryl Streep and ANY female director, of ANY age, have in getting meaningful work. We are silencing a huge part of our population for no good reason except an evolutionarily-based and culturally-supported preference for physical markers of youth and fecundity. At this point in our species' history, we really should do better.
And lol at butt-fat facials! I think it was Catherine Deneuve who said that once we reach a certain age, "it's either your face or your fanny." She was so right.
Of course obesity is correlated with heart disease, diabetes, etc. But science is not yet entirely sure how that correlation plays out. It is too simplistic to assume fat=unhealthy (or skinny=healthy). And weight is majorly biologically determined, not inevitably due to laziness or gluttony. So we need to work hard to separate the encouragement of good health habits, in everyone, from some sort of "aesthetic-," stereotype-based hostility against larger-bodied people. IMO. But again, I am no expert--just an interested observer of this for-sure warped world!
 
#14,043
misc books.jpg
What's everyone reading? Here's a pic of some books I've enjoyed over the summer. Major Pettigrew's Last Stand was very charming. I'm part way through Belgravia, and it reminds me a bit of Edith Warton's writing, similar themes. The Summer Before the War reminded me of Jane Austen's writing.
 
#14,044
etoile de mer said:
View attachment 3463516
What's everyone reading? Here's a pic of some books I've enjoyed over the summer. Major Pettigrew's Last Stand was very charming. I'm part way through Belgravia, and it reminds me a bit of Edith Warton's writing, similar themes. The Summer Before the War reminded me of Jane Austen's writing.
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OH these all look very good. Your reading taste is similar to mine. Thanks for sharing. I read nothing but work related things all summer. And tpf.
 
#14,045
etoile de mer said:
View attachment 3463516
What's everyone reading? Here's a pic of some books I've enjoyed over the summer. Major Pettigrew's Last Stand was very charming. I'm part way through Belgravia, and it reminds me a bit of Edith Warton's writing, similar themes. The Summer Before the War reminded me of Jane Austen's writing.
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Loved Ms. Pettigrews Last Stand! I also enjoyed Where'd You Go Bernadette and REALLY LOVED Elegance of the Hedgehog!
 
#14,049
I was a voracious reader as a child and continued to read quite a bit through my 20's, but ever since law school I don't do much pleasure reading. Now when I do read, I find myself drawn more to non- fiction. Had anyone read any good non- fiction books recently?
 
#14,051
klynneann said:
I was a voracious reader as a child and continued to read quite a bit through my 20's, but ever since law school I don't do much pleasure reading. Now when I do read, I find myself drawn more to non- fiction. Had anyone read any good non- fiction books recently?
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Hi klynneann, I love non-fiction, too! I'm not sure what your interests are, but here are some I really enjoyed. None are new releases, and I read them quite a while ago, but I held onto them, meaning I'd read them again!
books1.jpg books2.jpg books3.jpg
 
#14,052
klynneann said:
I was a voracious reader as a child and continued to read quite a bit through my 20's, but ever since law school I don't do much pleasure reading. Now when I do read, I find myself drawn more to non- fiction. Had anyone read any good non- fiction books recently?
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I sympathize. I loved to read in my younger days. I consider it the key to my success. Medical school ruined that for me. I keep thinking I need to get back to it. It's odd how our professional training changes us.
 
#14,053
Klynnanne, The Immortal Irishman is excellently written and the amazing bio of a man who was in an Irish uprising, transported to Tasmania, became a general in the American Civil War and then Governor of Montana!
Lanit, I am glad you liked Bernadette, I did also, it is so quirky.
One of the best features of being retired is lots of time to read!
 
#14,054
etoile de mer said:
Hi klynneann, I love non-fiction, too! I'm not sure what your interests are, but here are some I really enjoyed. None are new releases, and I read them quite a while ago, but I held onto them, meaning I'd read them again!
View attachment 3463708 View attachment 3463709 View attachment 3463710
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katekluet said:
Klynnanne, The Immortal Irishman is excellently written and the amazing bio of a man who was in an Irish uprising, transported to Tasmania, became a general in the American Civil War and then Governor of Montana!
Lanit, I am glad you liked Bernadette, I did also, it is so quirky.
One of the best features of being retired is lots of time to read!
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Wow, thank you both - I will definitely check these out! Maybe they will get me started reading again. :)
 
#14,055
Pocketbook Pup said:
I sympathize. I loved to read in my younger days. I consider it the key to my success. Medical school ruined that for me. I keep thinking I need to get back to it. It's odd how our professional training changes us.
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I feel like my vocabulary has been suffering because of it. I think it's because there's sooo much reading you have to do for school, once you're no longer forced to do it, it's almost a relief. And then maybe a little difficult to remember the time when you used you enjoy it.
 
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