Help me stop wanting more bags!!

[guccilover21]

Thanks for your responses guys. I really appreciate all the insight. I've started to appreciate what I have already all of a sudden and have really dug deep to see what I should do next. I've decided to focus on exercising more and becoming healthy. That is my current project and I have read that exercise helps you feel better, less anxious so perhaps if I fill my time with more important things that are good for me, I won't really have the energy to lust over new things. I've also blocked websites that will tempt me to buy more stuff. So far so good but so difficult!! thanks for all your support I really appreciate it.

By the way, I found that if I post pictures of items I already have and talk about those things (on this forum because it's hard to quit tpf), I feel more love towards them and don't feel the need to buy more. I don't know if that works for anyone else.

 

[bakeacookie]

Thanks for your responses guys. I really appreciate all the insight. I've started to appreciate what I have already all of a sudden and have really dug deep to see what I should do next. I've decided to focus on exercising more and becoming healthy. That is my current project and I have read that exercise helps you feel better, less anxious so perhaps if I fill my time with more important things that are good for me, I won't really have the energy to lust over new things. I've also blocked websites that will tempt me to buy more stuff. So far so good but so difficult!! thanks for all your support I really appreciate it.

By the way, I found that if I post pictures of items I already have and talk about those things (on this forum because it's hard to quit tpf), I feel more love towards them and don't feel the need to buy more. I don't know if that works for anyone else.

This helps tremendously!!

 

[reginaPhalange]

This helps tremendously!!

I totally agree and that's the great thing about tPF - that we can openly talk about our bags, lust over upcoming ones, and share pictures, it's hard to do that IRL or even on social media because it can often be misconceived which is unfortunate when all we wanna do is share our excitement about something we may have gotten to celebrate a milestone or something we've worked hard for. Another thing I do that helps me is a closet clean out, where anything I don't want will go into a few piles that I sort (things to sell, things to give to friends/family, and things to donate). It's nice knowing that someone else will be able to appreciate something that I may not have a use for anymore.

 

[Tulip2]

I also would like to "help stop me wanting more bags". I wish I had the magic answer to this question. For me, shopping has always been a hobby, type of therapy, source of joy and so on. I remember when I was only working part time at our family business, there was always plenty of time for shopping. In fact, I could just walk into the mall and my mood would elevate. :crazy: I always stayed within my budget. Always!
But as I grew older, my taste grew more expensive. Don't really know why...it just did.

I've been working full time now for the last 5 years. I've also grown older and by the weekend, I'm pretty pooped. Ah, no problem now because we have the internet to simply click on a button & it shows up at my door step. I now find it down right hard to stay within my budget. And of course, along the way I discovered TPF. I love this place but it's so dangerous. I have also started reading the book about "only keep the things that bring me joy" I think this will help, but it's going to take time.

But I still need to find a way to stop lusting over the new & gorgeous handbags, SLG's, & jewelry that I see Revealed here on TPF. I've sold most of my LV, so I guess that's a step forward, but it's simply been replaced by Chanel. Thanks OP for bringing this up. It's a real issue for many of us here (I suspect). Blessings to us all.

 

[ms p]

Bump thread up [emoji255][emoji175][emoji4] I've been in the buy-sell-buy-ban-buy cycle for way too long. I used to think how is it possible for anyone to buy a bag evey 1-2 week and then I join in the craziness. I moved across several brands with the same cycle over the years. Had my brand snob moments too. Just wanted to say u are definitely not alone. Love this thread and all the great response. We are real people with real budget. We face life up and down. Don't be too hard on yourself/ourselves. A treat is fine but do take care of emergency funds, savings, bill etc first. There will always be another great ring/ bag/ dress again. Always place people above stuff [emoji4][emoji4][emoji4]

 

[elzi]

After the craziness of shopping for my first few designer bags and feeling overwhelmed (by the number of bags I have and by my constant thoughts about my next bag), I have since purged and thought about what I truly TRULY love. I'm down to 5 bags now and it feels really good!

 

[Kylacove]

I think we all go through a buying phase when we first give ourselves permission to buy more expensive bags. At some point it hit me that I had about every need more than covered and there are other things I could be doing with my purse money. For example l could put up that gazebo if I didn't buy that premier bag I was looking at. It's good to redirect your energy to something else to slow and break the buying cycle. It also helps me to go through what I already own periodically and rediscover a past love.

 

[sukikelly128]

I think we all go through a buying phase when we first give ourselves permission to buy more expensive bags. At some point it hit me that I had about every need more than covered and there are other things I could be doing with my purse money. For example l could put up that gazebo if I didn't buy that premier bag I was looking at. It's good to redirect your energy to something else to slow and break the buying cycle. It also helps me to go through what I already own periodically and rediscover a past love.

This really resonated with me as I was recently on a shopping frenzy. I said to myself,"I'm starting a new job so I should buy new things!" I stopped short of buying a very expensive bag (the new Dior diorama!) by thinking about where else I can put the money to. For me, I have the impulse to buy especially if it's seasonal items.

This is a great thread, kinda like a support group! Thank you to everyone who has shared it really inspired me to be more reflective about my purchases. [emoji4]

 

[LeilaCreates]

This is an important thread! I think marketing techniques sometimes make us feel like we 'need' more than we have. Fashion and beauty is a huge industry and they know how to reel us in. I follow bloggers and Youtuber's and find myself impulse shopping on fashion and beauty products, because (let's face it), it's FUN! I love the smell of a new leather handbag. I enjoy shopping downtown or getting a package of something luxe in the mail. I suppose it's a hobby, really. Who actually 'needs' more than one serviceable handbag? But every time time I purchase a new designer bag I start looking at the next one. My dressing room has a wall of shelves devoted to handbags, and some of them have never been used, because I have about 8-10 favorites that I tend to rotate with. | just did an enormous splurge on new Chanel skin care and make up after stopping by the website with the idea of just picking up some more cotton pads and toner. My husband doesn't mind, and we can afford these purchases, but I certainly could be spending more wisely. I think about all the people in need on this planet and feel guilty. This thread has me thinking about my 'wants' and 'needs', and I'm feeling I need to devote much more time charity work than I'm doing. Material possessions mean nothing in the end. I cared for my mother until she passed, and in her last days she didn't need or care about a single material possession. In her unconscious state the only thing that mattered was the presence of her family and her relationship with the Lord. This thread has me re-thinking a great many things. It's also made me realize I might be spending extra time shopping to fill the void where my mother used to be. Grief is a lonely process.

 

[BlackGrayRed]

This is an important thread! I think marketing techniques sometimes make us feel like we 'need' more than we have. Fashion and beauty is a huge industry and they know how to reel us in. I follow bloggers and Youtuber's and find myself impulse shopping on fashion and beauty products, because (let's face it), it's FUN! I love the smell of a new leather handbag. I enjoy shopping downtown or getting a package of something luxe in the mail. I suppose it's a hobby, really. Who actually 'needs' more than one serviceable handbag? But every time time I purchase a new designer bag I start looking at the next one. My dressing room has a wall of shelves devoted to handbags, and some of them have never been used, because I have about 8-10 favorites that I tend to rotate with. | just did an enormous splurge on new Chanel skin care and make up after stopping by the website with the idea of just picking up some more cotton pads and toner. My husband doesn't mind, and we can afford these purchases, but I certainly could be spending more wisely. I think about all the people in need on this planet and feel guilty. This thread has me thinking about my 'wants' and 'needs', and I'm feeling I need to devote much more time charity work than I'm doing. Material possessions mean nothing in the end. I cared for my mother until she passed, and in her last days she didn't need or care about a single material possession. In her unconscious state the only thing that mattered was the presence of her family and her relationship with the Lord. This thread has me re-thinking a great many things. It's also made me realize I might be spending extra time shopping to fill the void where my mother used to be. Grief is a lonely process.

I'm so sorry for your lose.
You spending time with your mom in her last days meant everything. Those moments are priceless and what truly matter.

I think doing more charitable work is a great idea.
Kindness benefits the receiver and the giver (and everyone who witnesses it).

Sending hugs and prayers...

 

[LeilaCreates]

I'm so sorry for your lose.
You spending time with your mom in her last days meant everything. Those moments are priceless and what truly matter.

I think doing more charitable work is a great idea.
Kindness benefits the receiver and the giver (and everyone who witnesses it).

Sending hugs and prayers...

Thank you so much for your kind words and prayers!

 

[barbee]

This is an important thread! I think marketing techniques sometimes make us feel like we 'need' more than we have. Fashion and beauty is a huge industry and they know how to reel us in. I follow bloggers and Youtuber's and find myself impulse shopping on fashion and beauty products, because (let's face it), it's FUN! I love the smell of a new leather handbag. I enjoy shopping downtown or getting a package of something luxe in the mail. I suppose it's a hobby, really. Who actually 'needs' more than one serviceable handbag? But every time time I purchase a new designer bag I start looking at the next one. My dressing room has a wall of shelves devoted to handbags, and some of them have never been used, because I have about 8-10 favorites that I tend to rotate with. | just did an enormous splurge on new Chanel skin care and make up after stopping by the website with the idea of just picking up some more cotton pads and toner. My husband doesn't mind, and we can afford these purchases, but I certainly could be spending more wisely. I think about all the people in need on this planet and feel guilty. This thread has me thinking about my 'wants' and 'needs', and I'm feeling I need to devote much more time charity work than I'm doing. Material possessions mean nothing in the end. I cared for my mother until she passed, and in her last days she didn't need or care about a single material possession. In her unconscious state the only thing that mattered was the presence of her family and her relationship with the Lord. This thread has me re-thinking a great many things. It's also made me realize I might be spending extra time shopping to fill the void where my mother used to be. Grief is a lonely process.

Everything you said really resonated with me. I remember my mother's last days also, in a long term care facility. She did not have anything she loved from her home, and, truth be told, we will all "lose" what we have now, when we pass. As we age and medical issues take precedent, material "things" just won't mean as much.
I have plenty of handbags--not the 30-50 some have, but enough that I sometimes have to prod myself to switch, as I am happy with the one currently in use. Yet, I keep looking, thinking which bag I should buy next. The media, including Purseforum, helps to cause this. I do love Purseforum, but find I become much too obsessive in reading what others other buying It all appears fabulous. I love seeing the Chanel brooches, but I have maybe one dress that might need such a brooch. Wouldn't it be great to buy a Chanel bag every 1-2-3 months as many seem to do? OK, it;s fun to see others do this, but I just cannot. What about a Kelly?? I enjoy reading a Paris Trip for a Hermes bag. Yes, I am going to Paris this summer! So,,,,shouldn't I wait in line at 7:00 am, and possibly come home with one of the most sought after bags? Sorry, it does not fit my casual lifestyle. Or my wallet. The best I can say is to try to reach a balance. Lust after a bag, finally buy it, and be happy, content, etc. For a period of time, at the very least.

 

[kayaus]

I just read this, about the girl at the hairdressers and her sexiest bag ever, and how it is along for the ride in her life. I love it! I too have seen people like this, and I want to be like that! But I somehow can't pull it off. I am obsessed with bags. Obsessed. Buy more, purge, buy more. I am totally aware that I have been on a quest for years to get that one sexy bag (and by sexy I mean that is isn't brand new and gorgeous, but has "lived" with me, had my experiences of life with me, and is oozing with evidence of that). If I could ever find that one bag, I feel like I would be done and my obsession would subside. However, I do realize that in order for a bag to become this sexy, one needs to keep it for a long time, and use it all the time, and feel relaxed enough to "toss it on the counter", and get on with one's life, with the bag "along for the ride". I have never found the perfect bag for this, but also realize that if I keep buying and purging and not consistently using "the" bag (should I ever find it!), then how will I ever get to be like this girl you write about, with the sexiset bag ever?

QUOTE="2cello, post: 31260888, member: 611175"]I'm not sure if this is the thread to post this story but it seems to have some application here...the last time I was getting highlights - you sit in that chair forever - there was a young twenty something in the chair next to me. She came in a whirlwind of energy, threw her bag on top of the counter and proceeded to speak to a dozen different friends on her cell about all the exciting things they were going to do next weekend while she waited for her color to set. I didn't recognize the bag, it was a tan hobo of some sort. It did look like good leather but not readily identifiable. Anyway, that was the sexiest bag I'd ever seen. It was beat to heck but that was what made it sexy. This young lady was living her life fully and her purse was just along for the ride. It was evidence of her living her life.

I kind of made a little promise to myself after that encounter not to get bags that would psychologically prevent me from being all joie de vivre with my life because I'd have to babysit the bag.[/QUOTE]

 

[RitaLA]

hi guys,

I'm sorry if this has already been talked about but I'm having shopping troubles. I can't enjoy what I have anymore. I always want the next thing. This applies to bags, jewellery, and other accessories. Realistically I have enough of everything and far too many bags. I look at the bags and get overwhelmed. I have been purging and then buying more. I need to stop and I want to enjoy what I have but I keep thinking of the next purchase and can't stop! I also have developed a weird snobbery like if I buy pre-loved designer items they are not "my story" and they kind of just sit there. Can you guys give me some advice on how to change my thinking and enjoy what I've got. I am currently obsessed with the alma BB even though I know if I buy it, it will just sit there as I'll be too scared to use it. Help me this is getting ridiculous!!

How have you been doing?

 

[Senf]

Great thread! I felt the same way! Couldn’t stop myself from buying bags although I had enough! Bags, cloes, shoes, kitchen items, decoration,...
I was living a totally financial secure life in a marriage that was once the most important thing in my life but slowly evolved into a nightmare. So I went shopping to forget. Bad fight...oh look that bag is cute.
I had reached every single goal that I set in my life. Downtown appartment, university degree, a good job, two adorable children, no financial worries,..

But I slowly changed! Bought a house by myself and will be moving soon with my children. Will get divorced and start a new life soon. And suddenly my obsession for bags has changed tremendously- haven’t bought any new clothes this year and no new shoes. I have other stuff to buy - furniture, a new car, ...

This also has changed the way I use bags. Previously I was obsessive about my bags. Now a bag has to be functional. It has to fit my new active lifestyle.
Have already so many new plans - vacation with my kids for example, so no leftover money for bags.

I think I was comparing myself with what others had to make myself happier. Now I am happier and stuff is nommore issue.