Do you have a friend...

#31
Anybody who would criticize my taste in bags, clothes or whatever would soon be an ex-friend of mine.

I think it is the rudest thing in the world to ask anyone (other than your spouse) what something cost - it's none of their business. If someone ever asks me something inappropriate like this, I always respond - and why would you ever ask such a question?

People only know as much about you as you are willing to reveal. Set up boundaries so people do not feel like they have the right to pry into your personal business. Peggy
 
#32
SilverFire said:
My friends are very critical...no matter what purse I have they always make comments asking if my bag is new and how much did it cost. One in particular will make really harsh comments all the time saying that there are people starving in other countries and I'm walking around with a $1,000 handbag on my shoulder. I try to defend myself but it's like talking to the wall when they say such harsh things to begin with.

My coworkers for the most part are the same way, to the point where I'm scared and embarassed to come in with my newest purchase.

I believe that everyone has there "thing" and mine just happens to be purses, and I try not to lower myself to their level and respect what "thing" makes them happy.
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Ewwwww, just reading that was making me cringe. It's like that at my job too. They ask how much was this or that or where did I get this or that. Most of my stuff is reasonable, I just accessorize with scarves and jewelry (never too big or too much) and make it look like it costs more:queen:. So, when I do splurge, it's on my daughter...or a HANDBAG...which will be hers someday so... Anywho, when I got my Miu Miu, and they started askin' about it, I told 'em it's fake just to get 'em off my back. I know I shouldn't have to lie about my bag, but I'm sick of hearing about how they'd never spend over $300 for a handbag, people starving in other countries, the price of gas, etc.
 
#33
Uggghhhh! It's that catty girl thing from your insecure girlfriends who WISH they were brave/pretty/thin/sexy/rich/loved, etc.. enough. I also have a friend who asks about prices of my clothes, shoes, bags. Whenever we get together she asks if something is new. (Well, it usually is as I love fashion and love looking good.) I always respond, "Oh, you just haven't seen this...got it a long time ago...was on sale..." and shut down the conversation. The worst was when she said, "Just don't go around trying to look like you're 20." I am way beyond 20! Meeeooooowwww!
 
#34
I have many friends who do not understand the bag thing at all, and a daughter and a friend who are totally into it like me., but, the ones that have the financial position to afford expensive bags and don't get them are the ones always asking me and even asking to borrow bags and accessories, and they could buy me 100 times!-I love dressing well and having my bags, accessories, etc., always have since I was a teenager and now that my kids are raised and gone, my grandchildren are well taken care of by their parents, I can splurge with no regrets.
 
#35
Luckily, most of my close friends are as bag or shoe obsessed as I am, but there are 2-3 co-workers that I know don't get it, but that's OK. I have no regrets or apologies for what I choose to splurge on.
 
#36
Yeah, nothing gets me more than people who have no idea a)how much I make B) what I ACTUALLY have in my closet C) what I SAVE D)or are fashion challenged lecturing me about spending money on a bag. GRRRRR....between people like that and my nasty "ex"friend who loved to tell me EVERYTHING i BUY is "ugly", I have to kind of wonder if that is just how they are and if I do this to other people(without realizing it). I mean, I wonder if something I lecture people about(which I really can't think of much right now) is like my own "bag obsession" to them? I guess, it all comes full circle, but in the long run, people are either rude or not. I just try to use the philosohy of "sugar coating" while being "direct".
 
#37
the ones that have the financial position to afford expensive bags and don't get them are the ones always asking me and even asking to borrow bags and accessories, and they could buy me 100 times
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LOL That one is going to keep me chuckling for a while, with apologies to the poster if the very sly humor was unintentional.

I don't spend much money for bags, nor would I if I were richer than Oprah, but it is up to each person to decide how they will spend money, and order their priorities.

I don't think that criticizing someone's priorities is likely to change them, and I am certainly equally vulnerable to the same criticism, why have I spent $10 on a bag for myself? It is hardly a question of need, I have many other bags.

However, if my next $10 is spent on something else, it is unlikely to be as a result of someone else's rudeness.... :smile:
 
#38
Nope. We pretty much knows to each his own. What they spend and what they like, as long as it makes them happy I'm happy for them. Same as the other way around.
 
#39
dont feel bad! every single one of my friends doesnt understand my bag fetish!... they all say its a waste of money, and it could be put to things that i could get better use out of! My parents dont understand as well! I basically have to hide a new purchase from them.. it sucks, no one seems to understand, except on this lovely forum!
 
#42
I have many people who always have to make comments about my purses. One of my friends use to be like this until she started to get into the purse thing.....which consisted of her buying all of the same coach purses I have, and buying the brown balenciaga-copy bag from Aldo and saying "It looks EXACTLY like your balenciaga, you can't even tell the difference." Im still bitter about it.........
 
#43
minami said:
yeah..my MIL actually said that she won't buy bags for more than $20! er...my DH let it slip that I'm into expensive bags (she doesnt know the prices) so I kinda felt put in the spot when she said she hears that I like expensive bags and that she never spends more than 20 bucks! er...I said you could find bags at the swap meet for $6....HAHA
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Sorry but what does MIL stands for? :sad:
 
#45
djgirl1976 said:
...that doesn't "get" your bag obsession and says mean things that actually hurt your feelings? I never forgot this, and though I do not even consider this person a friend anymore(we don't talk, and I told her to pound sand, pretty much), I still remember her rude comments.
3 or 4 years ago there was a Kate Spade paisley bag that I fell in love with instantly. It was REALLY bright and 70's looking and I HAD to have it right then. We were at the mall together and she kept telling me how ugly it was and how could it be so expensive.(it was 250ish). I bought it anyway. From then on she referred to it as "the ugly bag". She even made comments about it to our other friends. Why did I buy it, etc. I explained that it was not ugly, but not her style. Fine. She is one of those girls that won't pay more than 20 or 30 dollars for a bag and they are ALL black with white whipstiching. In other words, she doesn't use a bag as an accessory. A few years later, I had a bag I loved(croc leather in a crazy shade of beige-just gorgeous-and I got a lot of compliments on it-I even had a man comment that it must have been VERY expensive-it was) I picked her up at the airport and the first thing out of her mouth was not even hi. She said..."THAT's ugly!". I reiterated that it was "just not her style". It burned me up. I made a point to let her know a year or 2 ago when I sold the Kate Spade for more than I paid for it, that it was still a nice bag that held its value and someone else liked it. Like I said, I do not talk to her or consider her a friend anymore, as she was just too rude for me to be around, but I wonder if anything like this has happened to anyone else here?:wtf:
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rudeness! :wtf:

don't you think that maybe just deep down inside she's jealous that she cannot afford bags like that, or something, so she'd have to make you feel guilty or horrible about spending x amount on a bag? or maybe she keeps commenting on how ugly it is because the more she says it maybe eventually she'll believe it! :lol:

i always say, those who don't know how to keep such rude comments to themselves, and actually voices them must be using that an outlet for whatever shiet is going on in their lives.

if you're happy and content you'd have no reason to bring someone else down, esp. if it's a friend.

continue on with your bag obession! it's good that you're not friends with her anymore, no one should tolerate such negative energy! :flowers: :yes:
 
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