DISCUSS the Hermes AT Thread

[olive519]

...Or we can just forget all about this and move on, bygones be bygones. The majority and minority here do appreciate everything the "full" time and "part" time authenticators do for the members....and most do express the gratitude often. Maybe what really needed to be done is just hash this out in the open instead of letting it simmer inside...you know, a little catharsis exercise...

There have been some gems worthy ideas put forth here, primarily the new format (which makes reading the thread on a bb so much easier)

Next time someone asks for an authentication then starts the nagging but...but...but...seller promised first born yadda yadda someone just says caveat emptor/good luck and we move on to others waiting.

I very rarely ask anything to be authenticated and would rather not waste their time on bags that I already have and can compare but when I do, I'm grateful, very very grateful.

 

[Megs]

Many of these ideas are great, but not really doable (unfortunately).

- We *could* make the Hermes Shopping section only open to members who receive PM's (5 days 5 posts) but I don't think Vlad will want to do that. Unless I am totally wrong, not sure you can set that up with just one thread.

- I don't think there is a way to have people check that they read and followed the rules. Would be GREAT if everyone did, but they won't

I really think that it sounds like many of the authenticators went WAY above and BEYOND. I would feel burned out too!!! Again, I have not asked for help in the AT thread, but I can not imagine having countless people asking, questioning, questioning again (negatively I mean), then PMing. That would SURELY get tiring for anyone!!!!!!

Having the AT thread is a huge asset for all members. Of course we want it to be part of our forum, but this is a way the members can help others. But here are a few things I want to point out that I am thinking after reading the comments in this thread:

- There is no way to ensure that people asking for authentications will follow the rules. Even if we post it, even if we remind them, MANY people simply will not follow the rules.

- Politeness always goes a long way. Like another poster remarked, please and thank you really are kind words to hear. The people who are providing so much help could really use a big please and thank you for what they do and provide, out of their own time and many times for complete strangers

- No one has to post more information than they want to. If someone asks for reasons you don't have to answer, you can decline

- Sometimes the ignore feature or just ignoring really helps. If someone does not follow the format, is egging the board on, is not being easy to work with - rather than even engaging, just ignore

- Report anything suspicious

- Realize that we all see/read/hear things differently.

I must admit that when I saw part of the reported posts from the AT forum I thought it was mean. I did not understand that the story was completely made up, because all of the pieces did not add up as made up to me. I don't consider myself stupid, just uninformed in that situation. I guess I, as an admin, could have handled it much better if the reported post explained a bit of the background... but I could have also asked

In no way, shape, or form, am I saying any of the joking around, banter, and fun, needs to be taken out of the thread. I think there is still a difference between doing that and sounding mean. I guess for me, even when the trolls take over, I don't usually get too upset, or pick at them, etc. I ignore, ban, delete, and move on. I know we all handle things differently, but even sarcastic comments on the web may come off 100% meaner than expected.

And lastly, the moderators do as we ask them to, as in Vlad and I. Many times that involves stepping into a thread rather than PMing a person. We make mistakes, Vlad and I make mistakes, but please do PM us. I know we mess up on the forum, and I actually appreciate being called out (if it could be nicely I would appreciate it more!).

I, for one, am very thankful to everyone who makes our forum a better place. We have an amazing member base who show time and time again how great they are. And as I see more of how much the authenticators put into the AT thread, I realize what generous people they are. So if they are reading, THANK YOU for making the Hermes forum so knowledgeable, fun, and great.

 

[Cavalier Girl]

<I, for one, am very thankful to everyone who makes our forum a better place. We have an amazing member base who show time and time again how great they are. And as I see more of how much the authenticators put into the AT thread, I realize what generous people they are. So if they are reading, THANK YOU for making the Hermes forum so knowledgeable, fun, and great.>

Thank you, Megs and Vlad for taking so much of your time to help us out. It sounds as though you guys have a very good handle on things!

Thank you!

CG

 

[Handybags]

But the AT thread has been a real turnoff lately. I am sure many fear posting anything, or just don't look at that thread anymore because it has become clogged with ill will and is no longer helpful.

Beyond that, everyone should keep their comments to themselves!

I've gotten several very nice pms, actually, from people who said they felt exactly that - fear of posting lest they be ganged up on by the "senior members"... but then at least a couple of those members did pm jag and other moderators, too, so the mods know how people feel about the subforum.

I very sincerely do not undestand this at all and would really appreciate an explanation here. What could one possibly "fear" from this thread?

If you post a fake it will be called out as such. End of story. And I would think one would be grateful they had not parted with cash for rubbish and move on?

I have followed this thread for a very long time and with the exception of a little late night sport with some very obvious trolls I've seen nothing untoward.

Some people feel the need to challenge the response they have and that's OK, members state their piece, so do the authenticators and we all move on.

Again, I am most sincere in my confusion.

 

[lilpicotin]

I very sincerely do not undestand this at all and would really appreciate an explanation here. What could one possibly "fear" from this thread?

If you post a fake it will be called out as such. End of story. And I would think one would be grateful they had not parted with cash for rubbish and move on?

I have followed this thread for a very long time and with the exception of a little late night sport with some very obvious trolls I've seen nothing untoward.

Some people feel the need to challenge the response they have and that's OK, members state their piece, so do the authenticators and we all move on.

Again, I am most sincere in my confusion.

Some people - myself included - do not like it when we see "a little late night sport with some very obvious trolls" - but don't comment because the senior members talk like they have the right to insult and trash people who they have judged to be "trolls." The fear is that, if we post how we feel about the trash talk, the bullying will then turn to be aimed towards us.

The thing is, jumping on a new poster who's been judged to be a troll just sets the tone for the entire thread. Maybe most of you feel that that's just fine. And maybe the people who feel that this is NOT fine are a minority. I myself didn't say anything for a long time because I assumed I was in the minority, and it was only after Swanky and jag posted that I realized I wasn't the only one who felt this way, and felt that it was okay for me to state how I felt about the AT thread.

Again, my problem with the particular post that sparked this entire controversy is that I don't see why that story meant the poster was necessarily trying to scam anyone. This could have been the story that the poster was told by his mother/aunt whomever. OR, equally likely, the poster didn't want to tell his real story on a public forum for privacy reasons, so made one up - but that doesn't mean he's a troll or was in the business of knowingly selling fakes. He could have just wanted to protect his privacy, and honestly thought his bag was authentic. All that was required was a simple reply saying his bag was fake - and to move on. What ensued was a couple of pages of hurtful trash talk and accusations - really unnecessary.

I keep trying to say things in several iterations, but I think I'll stop after this post because I realize that those who are willing to hear will hear it - and I know they've heard because they've pm'd me to express their support. But those who won't never will.

 

[Handybags]

BG I'm am very willing to hear what you are saying which is why I asked the question and I do thank you for explaining.

 

[Swanky]

Hi! I'm sure that I'm the one some of the members are mad at. And although I'm truly sorry for upsetting anyone, as that was not my intention, I'm also glad it prompted a discussion about this as clearly it was needed.
But there's a LOT of folks turned off by the bullying in that thread, I received at least 9 PMs personally thanking me for speaking up and asking people to stop the bullying/snide comments.
To me that's not relevant to helping someone not get scammed.
And if we let members {veterans or not} start behaving like vigilantes in that thread then it sets a dangerous precedent and will likely permanently change the whole vibe of this Forum and the entire website.

Obviously asking people to stop making fun of someone does not = us not valuing them and their time. EVERY forum on tPF has an AT thread and for some reason the one in Hermes is the only one w/ this problem.
There should be very little commentary in an AT thread because they just get so long, so fast and become sort of hard to navigate when people come back and dig for their response.
We LOVE and value our authenticators very much, I've been known to start threads solely for the purpose to applaud them and thank them for their time.
But we just can't have people be afraid to post a plea for help. If you question their motive, please just report them, don't change the dynamic of an entire thread and humiliate them.

Again, we truly, truly value our authenticators and they DO deserve thank you's from EVERY PERSON that ever posts a question in an AT thread.

 

[Perigord]

Hi! I'm sure that I'm the one some of the members are mad at. And although I'm truly sorry for upsetting anyone, as that was not my intention, I'm also glad it prompted a discussion about this as clearly it was needed.
But there's a LOT of folks turned off by the bullying in that thread, I received at least 9 PMs personally thanking me for speaking up and asking people to stop the bullying/snide comments.
To me that's not relevant to helping someone not get scammed.
And if we let members {veterans or not} start behaving like vigilantes in that thread then it sets a dangerous precedent and will likely permanently change the whole vibe of this Forum and the entire website.

Obviously asking people to stop making fun of someone does not = us not valuing them and their time. EVERY forum on tPF has an AT thread and for some reason the one in Hermes is the only one w/ this problem.
There should be very little commentary in an AT thread because they just get so long, so fast and become sort of hard to navigate when people come back and dig for their response.
We LOVE and value our authenticators very much, I've been known to start threads solely for the purpose to applaud them and thank them for their time.
But we just can't have people be afraid to post a plea for help. If you question their motive, please just report them, don't change the dynamic of an entire thread and humiliate them.

Again, we truly, truly value our authenticators and they DO deserve thank you's from EVERY PERSON that ever posts a question in an AT thread.

I am not a mod...just a "citizen." I may be jumping in front of a train here and I may be banned for life from this thread but I would love to simply ask that we discuss the tone of the thread and the issues that have emerged without terms like "bully" and "vigilante." These are powerful words that carry some weight and that can create some pain, and they risk adding to the divisiveness rather than building thoughtful bridges. If members felt stung by any reprimands, they would feel stung anew by this--and just at a point when the greatest concern of the largest number of members seems to be how we move to solutions. I know we all as members of this great forum have very different views about what constitutes either lively or polite discourse and we all have views about how we operate and what we do. Part of the richness of any community is always found in its diverse opinions. As we discuss where we have been and how we wish to shape ourselves as we go forward, words like this can stop all the great movement in its tracks. Can we move beyond forceful words like "bullying"? They seem to convey too much blame when we need to be more thoughtful and inclusive. All my thanks.

 

[Swanky]

No one would ever be banned for respectfully stating their opinion.

 

[Perigord]

whew...

 

[sarachryan]

I am not a mod...just a "citizen." I may be jumping in front of a train here and I may be banned for life from this thread but I would love to simply ask that we discuss the tone of the thread and the issues that have emerged without terms like "bully" and "vigilante." These are powerful words that carry some weight and that can create some pain, and they risk adding to the divisiveness rather than building thoughtful bridges. If members felt stung by any reprimands, they would feel stung anew by this--and just at a point when the greatest concern of the largest number of members seems to be how we move to solutions. I know we all as members of this great forum have very different views about what constitutes either lively or polite discourse and we all have views about how we operate and what we do. Part of the richness of any community is always found in its diverse opinions. As we discuss where we have been and how we wish to shape ourselves as we go forward, words like this can stop all the great movement in its tracks. Can we move beyond forceful words like "bullying"? They seem to convey too much blame when we need to be more thoughtful and inclusive. All my thanks.

I totally endorse these comments. In any arena the terms "bully" and "vigilante" are used to describe legally actionable behavior. It is so utterly inappropriate and unjustified to label our respected authenticators as such. It's very unfortunate.

 

[ardneish]

I am not a mod...just a "citizen." I may be jumping in front of a train here and I may be banned for life from this thread but I would love to simply ask that we discuss the tone of the thread and the issues that have emerged without terms like "bully" and "vigilante." These are powerful words that carry some weight and that can create some pain, and they risk adding to the divisiveness rather than building thoughtful bridges. If members felt stung by any reprimands, they would feel stung anew by this--and just at a point when the greatest concern of the largest number of members seems to be how we move to solutions. I know we all as members of this great forum have very different views about what constitutes either lively or polite discourse and we all have views about how we operate and what we do. Part of the richness of any community is always found in its diverse opinions. As we discuss where we have been and how we wish to shape ourselves as we go forward, words like this can stop all the great movement in its tracks. Can we move beyond forceful words like "bullying"? They seem to convey too much blame when we need to be more thoughtful and inclusive. All my thanks.

I so agree with this!
Its not going to help using these words to mend any bridges, its going to make it worse.

My main problem with "The incident", is it was not taken to PM, If you are in the workplace and your boss came into an open office and gave you a huge telling of, in front of your workmates and possibly customers, that to me is bullying and shows weak management. It devalues and shows no respect to the positive the individual has given over a huge amount of time, there is a lack of a balanced view.

and I for one would not tolerate that, a telling of in private where two adults can discuss the problem and reach an agreement is the way to go.

There is so much horror in the world because of intolerance and lack of communication/understanding

Can there now be a way forward to get the thread back on track for senior members mods to contact the missing authenticators to try and mend bridges why are people scared of this??

Blue Genes , never ever ever be to afraid to stand up to what you believe in, if you do this in life you are allowing yourself to be a victim, stand up tall you are as important and valued as any other human being, do not go behind closed doors to discuss , stand proud.

 

[Kellybag]

I think you are spot on!^^

Many of the problems we have here are that people do not respect other people. You can't just blurt out how you feel even if it is killing you inside. YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT TO PM! You have to show respect or just walk away. You can also use the ignore function if someone continues to annoy you.

Can you imagine if I, a mod for this section, attacked everyone for the rules they break or things I don't like right out in the open? No one would respect me and how long would I last here? There is just a right way and a wrong way; and as long as I have been here to help mod this section, I try to follow the rules. It can be tough, but anyone can do it.

We must try harder to respect one another. It is tiring to pm back and forth constantly about an issue, but I do it. People deserve that. I also think before I type because I try to make sure my words are not taken the wrong way.

 

[kashmira]

First of all I would like to thank all authenticators!!!!! Thanks to the tPF members who helped me I now have an H-rainbow which I would only have dreamt of if it were not for them. It's amazing how much effort they put in helping newbies as myself so .

As a "H newbie" there are some things that I have been thinking of that when it comes to the authentication thread:

* Perhaps this is a stupid idea but sometimes I have been thinking if it would be better to have three threads for authentication- one for bags, one for scarves/shawls and one for other items (accessories etceteras) or would this make everything much more complicated?!

* Would it be possible to have the authentication thread in separate sub-forum and in that way restrict members without "PM-status" to post? (I was thinking of Megs comment regarding that it might not be possible to do that only for one thread).

 

[jag]

I think you are spot on!^^

Many of the problems we have here are that people do not respect other people. You can't just blurt out how you feel even if it is killing you inside. YOU HAVE TO TAKE IT TO PM! You have to show respect or just walk away. You can also use the ignore function if someone continues to annoy you.

Can you imagine if I, a mod for this section, attacked everyone for the rules they break or things I don't like right out in the open? No one would respect me and how long would I last here? There is just a right way and a wrong way; and as long as I have been here to help mod this section, I try to follow the rules. It can be tough, but anyone can do it.

We must try harder to respect one another. It is tiring to pm back and forth constantly about an issue, but I do it. People deserve that. I also think before I type because I try to make sure my words are not taken the wrong way.

So Well said! I just want to reiterate that we do appreciate everyone's contributions to this forum, especially those of our authenticators. I will continue to do everything I can to keep the AT thread going and in a way that makes it easier for the authenticators. I think there have been some excellent suggestions in this thread and I hope we can implement some of these ideas! And I also think that anyone who asks for something to be authenticated needs to realize that they are asking for a free service and should use the recommended format in order to make it easier for the authenticators help.

I also think at this point, as Olive so wisely suggested, we need to just let bygones be bygones and start moving forward. We all need to feel good about participating in the threads and get back to the one thing that is most important: having fun! Trust me, i would love to log on and just have fun with everyone in the threads I also think that ALL of us need to be more cognizant of what we post and just try to be nicer to everyone! (this applies to the board as a whole, not just one thread)