2025 Resolution: Shopping my own Bag and SLG Collection

[papertiger]

Do wet want some new challenges in August?

How about wearing one non-black neutral per week (whatever is a neutral for you)

 

[whateve]

IMO - either extreme is a sign of mental health problems. Someone who can’t feel sentimentality to the point of throwing out what others love is just as in need of “help” as someone who is a true hoarder.

I think the big issue is when someone else’s approach to material items infringes upon another’s happiness. My mother is not only hoarder but also keeps things filthy. My dad tried to clean but he was building a business while working full time. When I turned about 7 or 8, I took over washing all of our clothes and keeping the kitchen as clean as I could. But my mother always did her best to pile and dirty things up.

Many years later when she retired (my father had died long before), I brought her into our home and gave her a freshly constructed suite with a bedroom, full bath, sitting room and kitchenette. Despite us having weekly housekeeping and me going in every few days to try to keep things on track, her rooms were always crowded, disheveled and filled with odor. On a scale of 1-10, I’m an 8.5 or 9 on the neat / clean scale so it drove me bananas. Now I realize she is simply a narcissist who is also a hoarder. It gave her some bizarre glee to keep my father and then me unhappy with living spaces. Ultimately, after 7 miserable years of her causing chaos in a myriad of ways, I had to move her out.

Bottom line - my point is that people have a range emotional relationships with things. For me, my things have to serve or bring joy to my family and me otherwise they frustrate me. For some, their control of things (hoarding or eliminating) can be used as a weapon. You wouldn’t think that “stuff” could hold so much power - but it can.

I'm so sorry. That sounds like a never ending nightmare. You shouldn't have had to become the adult as such a young age. My mom was an excellent housekeeper. My dad liked to buy things but he never let it get unorganized. He enjoyed the things he bought.

I can't stand odor. It would be so hard to live with someone that smelled.

My daughter's daughter lived with her other grandmother for awhile. They never let us into her house. I heard that she was a hoarder but I don't know how bad it was. There were favorite books I loaned my granddaughter I never got back.

My sister and I don't really get along and don't stay in touch, especially once our parents died. She inherited their house but the last I checked she had sold it and moved into a rental manufactured home.

I love my things. I didn't realize how much being surrounded by beauty was important to me until we remodeled the house. It's made me so much happier. It's not just that things are newer. It's that everything looks clean and undamaged. There are no stains left over from the previous owner or broken tiles.

 

[Sparkletastic]

I'm so sorry. That sounds like a never ending nightmare. You shouldn't have had to become the adult as such a young age. My mom was an excellent housekeeper. My dad liked to buy things but he never let it get unorganized. He enjoyed the things he bought.

I can't stand odor. It would be so hard to live with someone that smelled.

My daughter's daughter lived with her other grandmother for awhile. They never let us into her house. I heard that she was a hoarder but I don't know how bad it was. There were favorite books I loaned my granddaughter I never got back.

My sister and I don't really get along and don't stay in touch, especially once our parents died. She inherited their house but the last I checked she had sold it and moved into a rental manufactured home.

I love my things. I didn't realize how much being surrounded by beauty was important to me until we remodeled the house. It's made me so much happier. It's not just that things are newer. It's that everything looks clean and undamaged. There are no stains left over from the previous owner or broken tiles.

I’m so glad you find happiness in your home and your things.

For me, it’s taken many hours of therapy to understand my mother and how I’d been forced to be a little adult and then to heal from the impact. I’ve gotten to a good place where I have forgiven my mother though I no longer have any relationship with her (she’s done some truly horrendous things.)

But, like you, all of this has made being surrounded by beauty sooooo very important to me. I’ve worked hard to make my homes places that family and friends feel loved in just as much as they are places that make me thrilled aesthetically.

And I agree, beauty is not synonymous with luxury or newness. I have every thing from expensive bespoke furniture to unusual thrifted decor. For me it’s all about weaving a visual story as I build my nest.

(Oh and yes. I had an incredibly sensitive nose before brain surgery took my sense of smell. Dealing with the odors made me want to jump off a cliff. She would literally hide dirty clothes and dishes. Once, I found a “stash” behind her headboard. I just wanted to throw the whole bed out the window. Ugh!)

 

[Sparkletastic]

Back to handbags. I’d mentioned that I have a black medium single flap Chanel w/ghw (not a Diana) on my allowed-to-buy list. My issue has been finding one in great condition.

Well, I just ordered two from Fashionphile with the hope one will be perfect for me. But, after I checked out, I had an odd flash of a question - Do I still want this bag? 😱 This may be a leftover want that’s expired.

I’ve really enjoyed wearing everything but my Chanel bags the past couple of years. And I’ve cooled on wanting bags that are widely faked in favor of having something less on people’s radar. I don’t mean quiet luxury as I hate that over used term and avoid the “look” like the plague. I just mean owning a bag I don’t see everywhere - one that is more a reflection of my taste than any trend. I would go bespoke but I’m not willing to pay those prices.

So, this will be interesting. There may be a bag epiphany on the horizon. In the interim, I loaded my black C SF Jumbo to wear for tomorrow.

 

[dcooney4]

My sister is like that. Absolutely no sense of sentimentality. After my parents died, she donated or threw away nearly everything before I had a chance to ask for anything.

I am sorry that happened.

 

[dcooney4]

IMO - either extreme is a sign of mental health problems. Someone who can’t feel sentimentality to the point of throwing out what others love is just as in need of “help” as someone who is a true hoarder.

I think the big issue is when someone else’s approach to material items infringes upon another’s happiness. My mother is not only hoarder but also keeps things filthy. My dad tried to clean but he was building a business while working full time. When I turned about 7 or 8, I took over washing all of our clothes and keeping the kitchen as clean as I could. But my mother always did her best to pile and dirty things up.

Many years later when she retired (my father had died long before), I brought her into our home and gave her a freshly constructed suite with a bedroom, full bath, sitting room and kitchenette. Despite us having weekly housekeeping and me going in every few days to try to keep things on track, her rooms were always crowded, disheveled and filled with odor. On a scale of 1-10, I’m an 8.5 or 9 on the neat / clean scale so it drove me bananas. Now I realize she is simply a narcissist who is also a hoarder. It gave her some bizarre glee to keep my father and then me unhappy with living spaces. Ultimately, after 7 miserable years of her causing chaos in a myriad of ways, I had to move her out.

Bottom line - my point is that people have a range emotional relationships with things. For me, my things have to serve or bring joy to my family and me otherwise they frustrate me. For some, their control of things (hoarding or eliminating) can be used as a weapon. You wouldn’t think that “stuff” could hold so much power - but it can

My stepdad was an organized hoarder. It drove my Mom bonkers.

 

[Sparkletastic]

Ya know how you may think you have a handle on an issue? And you put a solution in place to solve for it? Then you find out you were off base all along so your solution is worthless?

Well, I’ve finally figured out why I can’t get a lock on my bag collection. I have a bad actor here in my house! Mr. Sparkle!

I was just mentioning to him over morning tea that I’d bought the 2 Chanels hoping one would be perfect but that I’m having second thoughts. I also said that I might just pass altogether and wait a few more months before I add anything so I can enjoy what I have and identify any true (vs imagined) gaps.

All of a sudden he starts looking guilty. Then he admits he’s bought me a bag for one of my Valentine’s Day presents. I reminded him that he agreed not to enable. He said it’s not enabling if the purchase decision wasn’t mine.

Yeah. Ok. Sure. Um… nope! I don’t think it works that way.

I know that whatever he bought will be pretty, unique but not every day practical. I’ll end up loving it which is not training him in the right way. LOL! But, I’m grateful that he likes making me happy. Now I have something to look forward to besides the distant seeming dream of having my doggone bathroom finished!

 

[Vintage Leather]

We are approaching the end of the month, and I still haven’t established goals for the year.

In my defense, I fell off a mountain while hiking Jan 1, and have been slowly recovering - a lot more slowly than I used to.

I’ve shopped a fair piece this this first month of the year, mostly for gifts. I’ve counted the gifts I will receive, but not the ones I’ve purchased. But should I? When will VintageMama’s collection need to be dealt with and become my issue?


Does anyone else have a “bags that don’t count” category, and what is in it? And if a NoCount bag moves into a different usage, does it count, or is it a ghost in the collection?

I’ve been using a travel bag as a briefcase for work - travel bags Don’t Count, but work bags do. Reusable shopping bags Don’t Count, but what if they’re treated silk?

Personally: bags that are outward bound (either as listed for sale or designated as gifts) don’t count. Likewise, travel, hobby and reusable shoppers are part of my NoCount list - and the travel and shoppers go as accessories if I do sell them. But VintageMama and I were debating if it’s the functionality or cost that determines if something is a bag.

 

[Sparkletastic]

We are approaching the end of the month, and I still haven’t established goals for the year.

In my defense, I fell off a mountain while hiking Jan 1, and have been slowly recovering - a lot more slowly than I used to.

I’ve shopped a fair piece this this first month of the year, mostly for gifts. I’ve counted the gifts I will receive, but not the ones I’ve purchased. But should I? When will VintageMama’s collection need to be dealt with and become my issue?


Does anyone else have a “bags that don’t count” category, and what is in it? And if a NoCount bag moves into a different usage, does it count, or is it a ghost in the collection?

I’ve been using a travel bag as a briefcase for work - travel bags Don’t Count, but work bags do. Reusable shopping bags Don’t Count, but what if they’re treated silk?

Personally: bags that are outward bound (either as listed for sale or designated as gifts) don’t count. Likewise, travel, hobby and reusable shoppers are part of my NoCount list - and the travel and shoppers go as accessories if I do sell them. But VintageMama and I were debating if it’s the functionality or cost that determines if something is a bag.

Oh my goodness! I am SO sorry you’ve been injured. How are you feeling? I hope you don’t need any orthopedic intervention. Bag planning can wait til you’re feeling yourself again.

I definitely have a bags that don’t count list:
• Minaudières (like the Dior holiday bags. They’re cute but I use them as closet decorations)
• Themed cosplay & convention bags
• Travel bags (luggage, laptop bags, backpacks, etc.)
• Special use bags (clear bags for stadiums, documents storage bag, etc.)
• Bags that I’ve listed for sale or sent to consignment (I never bring these bags into my collection once they hit this stage)

My rationale for these not counting is that they aren’t bags I can choose to wear on any given day because they have a specific purpose and therefore significant usage limitations. They’re also relatively inexpensive low involvement bags. For the most part, if one disappeared, I wouldn’t care.

I don’t “manage” my does not count list because my natural aversion to “stuff” keeps these to a minimum.

 

[dcooney4]

We are approaching the end of the month, and I still haven’t established goals for the year.

In my defense, I fell off a mountain while hiking Jan 1, and have been slowly recovering - a lot more slowly than I used to.

I’ve shopped a fair piece this this first month of the year, mostly for gifts. I’ve counted the gifts I will receive, but not the ones I’ve purchased. But should I? When will VintageMama’s collection need to be dealt with and become my issue?


Does anyone else have a “bags that don’t count” category, and what is in it? And if a NoCount bag moves into a different usage, does it count, or is it a ghost in the collection?

I’ve been using a travel bag as a briefcase for work - travel bags Don’t Count, but work bags do. Reusable shopping bags Don’t Count, but what if they’re treated silk?

Personally: bags that are outward bound (either as listed for sale or designated as gifts) don’t count. Likewise, travel, hobby and reusable shoppers are part of my NoCount list - and the travel and shoppers go as accessories if I do sell them. But VintageMama and I were debating if it’s the functionality or cost that determines if something is a bag.

For me I have two lists one is handbags and the other is single use as in sport/ travel like gym bag, art backpack, travel backpack, overnight bag are in the second list. What I don’t count are reusable fabric bags for food shopping . As long as a bag is still in my house or at the consignment shop if it hasn’t sold it says on my list and in my photos so I don’t buy anything similar but better till it is gone.

 

[cowgirlsboots]

Well done! Fortunate that the seam allowances were generous enough to allow for alteration. Even better that with so much seaming, a little bit here and little bit there, gets you where you need to be. The flowers really make it! I love this.
signed - a lifelong seamstress

Aww, thank you!
What spoiled the seam allowances- as to expect in a theater costume meant to be fitted to various people, they were up to 2 cms wide- for me was, that at some point somebody notched them at the tight spots like the waist line limiting their potential a lot. What saved me were crazy horizontal / diagonal darts that helped re- structure the whole construction.
Certainly not dressmaking by the book...
I'm still amazed this tiny dress grew so much bigger without adding any extra fabric.

 

[cowgirlsboots]

@cowgirlsboots The dress looks beautiful on you!

Talking of sewing, I’m so looking forward to Paris Haute Couture week, which starts this week (Jan 27th).

A lifetime away, in my 20’s I used to receive tickets to the Chanel client’s show and fly to Paris and go to rue Cambon in the 1990’s with my hand signed ticked, it was so exciting.

I would only buy one piece, but I would tick off all of the pieces I liked -the rich clients would tick off Everything they wanted to order!
Mme Rivière was as charming to me as everybody else..
Afterwards I tried on the catwalk models, which were too big.

This week, in another life, I’ll just be watching on my iPad, downloading all of the shows, ordering nothing!

Then on 6th February New York Fashion week for Fall Winter 2025/26 begins..

My resolution is going to get triskier than it has been in January,especially when fresh summer clothes come in..11 weeks is a long time..

Thank you!
Enjoy all the fashion shows!
You are lucky to have had the full experience when you were younger.

 

[cowgirlsboots]

Back to handbags. I’d mentioned that I have a black medium single flap Chanel w/ghw (not a Diana) on my allowed-to-buy list. My issue has been finding one in great condition.

Well, I just ordered two from Fashionphile with the hope one will be perfect for me. But, after I checked out, I had an odd flash of a question - Do I still want this bag? 😱 This may be a leftover want that’s expired.

I’ve really enjoyed wearing everything but my Chanel bags the past couple of years. And I’ve cooled on wanting bags that are widely faked in favor of having something less on people’s radar. I don’t mean quiet luxury as I hate that over used term and avoid the “look” like the plague. I just mean owning a bag I don’t see everywhere - one that is more a reflection of my taste than any trend. I would go bespoke but I’m not willing to pay those prices.

So, this will be interesting. There may be a bag epiphany on the horizon. In the interim, I loaded my black C SF Jumbo to wear for tomorrow.

I can't wait to hear about your reaction/ decision once the bags you ordered arrive.
Do bag goals expire? This is a very interesting question!

 

[cecchetti]

We are approaching the end of the month, and I still haven’t established goals for the year.

In my defense, I fell off a mountain while hiking Jan 1, and have been slowly recovering - a lot more slowly than I used to.

I’ve shopped a fair piece this this first month of the year, mostly for gifts. I’ve counted the gifts I will receive, but not the ones I’ve purchased. But should I? When will VintageMama’s collection need to be dealt with and become my issue?


Does anyone else have a “bags that don’t count” category, and what is in it? And if a NoCount bag moves into a different usage, does it count, or is it a ghost in the collection?

I’ve been using a travel bag as a briefcase for work - travel bags Don’t Count, but work bags do. Reusable shopping bags Don’t Count, but what if they’re treated silk?

Personally: bags that are outward bound (either as listed for sale or designated as gifts) don’t count. Likewise, travel, hobby and reusable shoppers are part of my NoCount list - and the travel and shoppers go as accessories if I do sell them. But VintageMama and I were debating if it’s the functionality or cost that determines if something is a bag.

I have a navy leather travel shaped bag, really only large enough for overnight, I don’t count that (although i used to).

Feel better soon!

 

[Sparkletastic]

I can't wait to hear about your reaction/ decision once the bags you ordered arrive.
Do bag goals expire? This is a very interesting question!

I think bag goals definitely expire. As time passes, our tastes, styles, functionality requirements and even the space we have to store our bags can increase or decrease. So we modify goals as we go.

What I think can be more resistant to change are Holy Grail bags. Usually that is the ultimate bag a person craves but struggles to get because of cost, scarcity, etc. I think these deeply held desires sort of “hard bake” as the person dreams about and works to acquire the bag. I’m honestly glad I don’t have a Holy Grail bag. It would drive me batty to be hunting a scarce bag that I just “needed” to own. I’ve heard some people use personal shoppers to snag a rare bag. I’d hate to have to resort to that level of effort.

In any case, the Chanel medium flap is neither for me. It’s just a bag I think I’d be happy to wear that hadn’t reached my to-buy list until now. I think I may have outgrown my love for Chanel as they just don’t feel as special to me as they once did. I enjoyed wearing my black jumbo C yesterday but it was a mild, settled love - not an effusive, giddy love.

So, we’ll see what I think when the bags arrive.

 

[880]

I fell off a mountain while hiking Jan 1, and have been slowly recovering - a lot more slowly than I used to.

Oh no, I hope you are not in too much pain and feel better soon.

travel bags Don’t Count, but work bags do. Reusable shopping bags Don’t Count, but what if they’re treated silk?

💯 If the bag is treated silk and can be used as a hardbag and/or is from a premier designer for $$, IMO it counts

sport/ travel like gym bag, art backpack, travel backpack, overnight bag are in the second list. What I don’t count are reusable fabric bags

Agree; I don’t count any of these