Wow! That is just jacked up! I don’t understand why your injury should make her hostile? Maybe feel awkward or nervous or timid, but hostile? Shoving things at you and being aggressive? If I owned that shop, I would fire her ass as soon as I found out, because she obviously doesn’t know how to serve the PUBLIC, which don’t always look, smell, sound like or think/believe like you. Imagine how she treats others who might have a more “justified” reason for her disdain, like someone who had a pin/t-shirt/etc with an opposite political or moral/ethical stance than hers.A little story to get off my chest that is unrelated to bags but belongs in here. I joined this thread talking about my accident, and as it is about to be locked, I'll leave this story with it so as not to carry that weight into the next year.
There's a tiny coffee shop near me that I frequent. I get on well with the owner and all the staff, bar one of the baristas who happens to be on duty at the usual time I stop by.
Now, my order is not overly complicated (black coffee with a dash of skim), and I am always mindful to be cheery and friendly with the staff as I'm aware of how utterly exhausting their work can be. Yet, this one barista has always made it very clear that she is offended by my broken face. She grimaces when she sees me, steps away as though I have something contagious, huffs and puffs as she pulls my coffee and shoves the cup towards me with such aggression that she has spilled it onto the counter and onto my hand several times.
The owner, seeing her behaviour, has repeatedly explained that there's nothing medically wrong to cause her to fear me, but my face is simply different due to an accident; this made no difference to the treatment I received. Anyway, I do not let her bother me as the rest of the team are lovely and I want to support a small, local business.
As it happens, the shop was shut during the majority of this year due to lockdowns but has recently re-opened for takeaways. I have stopped by twice for a takeaway coffee to enjoy on my walks and both times this particular barista served me with a smile, answered my greetings and questions politely, served me my coffee without aggression or spillage and has been a completely different person all around.
I thought that perhaps the pandemic has shifted her perspective on things. Until today when the owner greeted me by name as I walked in and I saw the penny drop for the barista who immediately returned to her previous ill-mannered behaviour. It baffled me until I figured out what had happened. I'm now wearing a mask. The past two times she was friendly and polite, it was because she could not see the indented side of my face and, as such, did not recognize me.
I've known all along that people have been nicer all around since I've been wearing masks but this was a reminder that many do judge rather harshly.
I never thought I'd say this but, as cumbersome as they are, I may actually miss wearing a mask when this pandemic is finally over. That's not to say I am not wishing with all my heart that this nightmare ends, of course. I cannot wait for normalcy!
I suppose I'm quite lucky that I've experienced an upside to mask-life, rather than merely feeling suffocated all the time.
And that's that for 2020. Fingers crossed for brighter days ahead!
With that said, I hate that you become responsible for how others treat you. It’s wrong. You shouldn’t have to wear a mask to be treated like a human being. You are a kind, creative, warm, engaging person...I have seen plenty of evidence of that here. And you should be treated like you are. I don’t know why a lot of people treat those with differences and/or evidence of past misfortune as some kind of leper....it ain’t contagious and if they want to prevent it as much as possible maybe not acting like an ass would be more helpful. Please don’t live in the shadows or hide to please/appease these people or to make them more comfortable. They already live in the shadows they have created for themselves. THEY are the ones who are stunted and deformed and they have to live with it every second of every day. If they weren’t such douches, they would be pitiable. Well, yeah, they are and I feel sorry for them.
You are a survivor. Your face is your testimony...nothing else needs to be said. Hold your head high and turn your face fully to the sun. If others can’t handle the view, it is because THEY are the weak ones and cannot stand in the face of a true survivor.
You have my admiration. Here, we love YOU. AND your wicked bag skills...
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. Obviously I don't know this person, and I'm sure you've already worked out that it's their own fear that's triggering these inappropriate and hurtful responses. Work those boundaries and pity these feeble-minded, uneducated people to their own unresolved issues.
