What do your significant others think...

#46
My husband isn't "supportive", but yet he doesn't "scold" me for my handbag purchases. (I'm not a handbag collector/obsessor, but I tend to have many "interests of expense". ;) ) He knows I try and keep the purchases on the lower $ side. Much of his reaction correlates to how much $$$ I spent the previous month. :shame:


I have to admit, my place of work (nursing/head injury facility) helps me keeps things in perspective. Sometimes I'll be browsing handbags online with the intent to buy, then I need to pay a visit to one of the units in our facility and I begin to question myself as to whether I really need that handbag. Seeing a 20 yr old in a coma really makes you question what's important in life and I often feel guilty and almost ridiculous for considering such a frivilous purchase.
 
#47
LisaG719 said:
:sad: Honestly, I do feel guilty sometimes. I too remember thinking that $500 was a fortune. Sometimes that makes me rethink some of my purchases or even think of selling them. But, I know that I deserve it. I love being able to change bags throughout the day and know that I am carrying a quality bag. I do get a lot of :censor: from people at work about the price of my bags. The other day I literally had a man ask me what was wrong with me. He was going off about how I have something missing in my life because I spend so much money on material things and how he doesnt know how my husband puts up with me. In his words "If I was your husband I would have left your :censor: a long time ago". :mad:

That bothers me a lot so of course I try and stay away from telling people how much my bags are. In turn that makes people think that they are even more expensive than they are. It becomes a lose-lose situation.

Sorry but I had to get that off my chest. Do you guys encounter the same reaction from people?
Click to expand...

What that man said was so mean! Well, I don't know how his wife/gf puts up with his impoliteness toward others.
 
#48
LisaG719 said:
Thanks winternight.
I guess I am just so used to hearing crap from people.
My husband and I also keep separate finances. I like the freedom of being able to spend my money as I see fit. Of course to each their own! I know couples who are perfectly satisified by joint accounts.
Click to expand...

I am unmarried and still in college. Can you please tell me the advantages and disadvantages to having separate and joint? I'm just wondering, from a woman's prospective, how it is.
 
#49
I have never shared a joint checking account. Personally I dont feel comfortable having an allowance. However sometimes I do wish that I didnt have to deal with bill paying.

My DH I have been together since I was 17. Having a joint checking account just never came up. We do however share a savings account. I just dont bother even looking at it. It would be too tempting to just take a shopping trip. :graucho:
 
#50
he thinks its a waste and that i should seek a psychologist... then, he downplays it by saying they are my "k-mart bags" even when I tell him the prices.. lol lol
 
#51
my husband does not believe "you get what you pay for" for handbag. he thinks all handbags have same quality. :sad: he also does not understand me spending money on skincare, facials, etc. but i dont use his money and we keep separate finances, so he really does not have any say about waht i should do with my money.
why would i wasnna go through the pain of college and graduate school if i cannot even enjoy the fruit of labor for say in a form of buying handbag? doesn't make any sense does it?
 
#52
jillybean307 said:
Luckily my BF has two sisters just as obsessed (if not more so) with fashion than I am, so he's used to it. That doesn't mean that I don't still get The Look when I buy a bag or when he sees me on this forum!
Click to expand...

Hehehe, same luck here!
My husband's sister has a much larger collection of expensive handbags than I do, so he's considering the handbag spending normal!

Plus, he's a spender himself!

He's been lately encouraging me to order the potiron Birkin 30, which (strangely) I haven't done yet!
 
#53
My husband use to have a fit, but it didn't do any good, so he stopped. I am trying to self-limit for myself, not him. I am sure that he will never understand why I like handbags. I'm not sure why either. I ve never be able to explain it, I just do. Even as a little girl, I love them. Why do men like sports or coors lite? Who knows. I am getting a little tired of buying a handbag just to buy one, I have done this in the past. I kinda envy women who can stay dedicated to one handbag at a time. But there is so many to choose from. I think that fashion does feed off women's obsession for bags. Are we being used?
 
#54
ilovelouboutins said:
I am unmarried and still in college. Can you please tell me the advantages and disadvantages to having separate and joint? I'm just wondering, from a woman's prospective, how it is.
Click to expand...

Disadvantages to joint accounts - If a woman wants out of a marriage joint accounts can make things difficult if she is uncomfortable taking out a large sum. I've known several woman who were stuck because nothing much was ever left in the joint account and they didn't have enough control over the family's finances to save up on their own, making things like hiring a lawyer or leasing an apartment very difficult. If your significant other makes alot more money and you're allowed to spend it, ok that is an advantage, but if you don't have a separate account of your own its like you don't have your own 'cushion' and your own independance.

Advantages to separate accounts - You retain financial independance and get to spend your money without someone looking over your shoulder. I'm a professional and I can't even image not having my own account or my own credit cards. You decide what to spend and what to save and don't have to constantly have someone else treating you like a child and making comments (ok this is partially coming from annoyance at what I've seen other women go through).

Joint credit cards can also be a problem when they are run up too in the case of divorce.

Maybe someone who is pro joint accounts can offer some advantages, I'm too opposed to offer much - other than I do believe in joint accounts for major expenses like mortage payments, etc.
 
#55
Hm ... Mine doesn't like it AT ALL. In fact, he doesn't like me going online talking about purses either. He seems to think that everyone who talks about purses on forums are either trophy wives or trophy girlfriends who have nothing better to do than spend other people's hard-earned money. He also doesn't believe that I should spend so much money on Hermes unless I'm going to make money off of it. He feels that if I'm going to spend money, then the item that I spend on better make more money in return AND at the same time I am not allowed to use it because supposedly I MUST sell it.:hrmm:

Therefore, I don't tell him about my purse habits anymore. I also made it clear to him that if we get married, we're going to have both joint and individual account. I also don't plan on telling him how much I make lest he decides to monitor my spendings. I feel that it's my money so I should do as I wish with it as long as I'm not hurting anyone. Besides, if it's okay for him to spend money on coffee machines and speakers (which depreciate in value), I don't see anything wrong in spending money on Hermes and Faberge eggs.
 
#56
Hmmmm, when we stopped by the COACH store in the mall last weekend he left my side and rushed to the new scarf print bags and yelled at me, "Hey, why don't you get this? I like this print!"
 
#57
Boyf thinks I'm crazy! But he was the one that encouraged me to join this forum and make postings. I guess its because he is crazy about planes and flight similations.

In fact my boyf promised me any bag of my choice for my xmas pressie hehehe! I am think of the Chanel jumbo reissue in dark white.. I've already told him of the price, he was gobsmacked, but he said whatever I wanted hehehe!

I love him!

ps. he isn't very well off or anything, in fact I get paid more than him, but he should be getting me money in by the end of the year and he said he wants to treat me as soon as that happens. he is really sweet sometimes.
 
#59
Daniellejp said:
It took my BF about a year to understand my obsession, but now he is very supportive. I've even trained him how to spot fake LVs! I have a great job to support my habit, so there's really no reason for him to pass judgement. He likes to spend his money on certain things, and I like to spend mine on others!
Click to expand...

sounds like we're in the same boat! My boyfriend too can now spot a fake LV from a mile away!..and he has his obsessions and I have mine. Oh Louis, how I love thee :heart:
 
#60
To put it in a nutshell, my PHH thinks there should be some kind of purse intervention program available!...he thinks I have a screw loose or missing in my head. "How can ONE woman use that many handbags"? He just shakes his head and mumbles something whenever he sees me on the computer, blogging away on the forum!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top
Back