What do I do...need advice

L

Lucy

Member
Feb 7, 2006
44
0
#1
So, Im REALLY confused...

Been with my boyfriend for 7 months, never had an argument, we get on so well and he is so relialable and level headed, well he has been til the last week.....

You know when you just get that feeling that something isnt right, he has bee really distant the last week, not affectionate (which isnt like him), he hasnt been calling and texting like he normally does and well, to be honest he just isnt himself.

Today has been the worst, we both had today off and then he shot out of bed this morning saying that he had to go to work, so I got on with my day but as a little surprise I brought him 24 krispy kremes for him and his work friends, dropped them off at his work and they said he wasnt there.......

Spoke to him later and he said he was going out with his friends tonight, which is fine, I text him about 7 hours ago just saying hi and are you ok.........7 hours later still waiting for a text back, which isnt like him at all.

He is not one to play games, and usually he would come back to mine tonight but havent heard anything- am I worrying over nothing? I know it sounds stupid but am sittng here festering.
 
#3
You need to ask him what's going on and express to him what you have to us in this thread. Be direct. Don't beat around the bush. He is obviously preoccupied with something. Approach it from a concern perspective.
 
#5
Something's up. He lied to you about going to work and it sounds like he's withdrawing. Don't "fester" but if he's started getting flaky, it's time to ask him what's going on.
 
#6
Thanks girls, I think your right, I dont want to confront him, Im just worried I have done something which I am not aware of.

Sitting here stressing, not knowing if I should wait up for him, tried to call him, went straight to voicemail. I left an upbeat message, just asking if he was ok and if he got my message and said I hope he was having a good night.

Im not going to sit by the phone, ill let him enjoy his night and sit here on PF!
 
#7
I have a feeling he is dealing with some issues and he is having a hard time, that's why he seems distant. It may or may not have anythign to do with you. Men are strange that way, they are not like us, they don't talk about issues, they take them in. Talk to him, ask him if he wants to talk about it, and if you can help. I agree that you shouldn't corner him or anything, just wait for him to come home and talk to him calmly. I am sorry you are dealing with this, it is not easy. I've been there.
 
#9
Lucy said:
Thanks girls, I think your right, I dont want to confront him, Im just worried I have done something which I am not aware of.

Sitting here stressing, not knowing if I should wait up for him, tried to call him, went straight to voicemail. I left an upbeat message, just asking if he was ok and if he got my message and said I hope he was having a good night.

Im not going to sit by the phone, ill let him enjoy his night and sit here on PF!
Click to expand...

Sweetie, I am concerned about your perspective here.
He is acting like a jerk- HE IS. Not you.
WHY, WHY are you worried that "you have done something."

You deserve to be treated with respect and honesty.
Get to the bottom of what is going on. If he doesn't come clean and give you a proper explanation, move on. You deserve better. :yes:
 
#10
just chill for now.. try not to think too much of the situation, give him some breathing time and maybe tomorrow, have a small talk with him about what u have noticed and observed.. again, as previously mentioned, share your concern and try not to be on the offense or else, he may get defensive..
 
#11
You have to go with your intuition. Women are never wrong, but we are somehow socialized to ignore those gut feelings. Never have I felt something was fishy and been wrong. But remember, boys/men are sometimes cowards, and he may never tell you what is going on, he may just act it out in his behavior, like he is doing now.
Either way, there are many more fish in the sea...
 
#12
Sorry you're going through that, I personally suspect he's cheating, imo. BUT, there is no way you can confront him or accuse him of it just in case that might not be it. So what I would do if I were you is to investigate. Don't stalk him or anything like that:P but just be on the lookout for any weird signs, like him running out of the room to answer a call, him disappearing without explanation, ask his friends if they know what's going on, etc etc etc. If you find out he's up to no good, just break up with him.
 
#13
I agree with Lucrezia- you totally shouldn't think that you did something wrong. Him acting like this is NOT your fault and you really need to keep your chin up!!
But, TBH, this situation really sounds like my ex before he broke up with me completely OUT OF THE BLUE! It is only recently I have come to terms with the fact that it was HIS problem, NOT mine and I shouldn't have acted so insecure thinking I did something wrong.
This is NOT you! Remember that!!!!!
 
#14
LucreziaCA said:
Sweetie, I am concerned about your perspective here.
He is acting like a jerk- HE IS. Not you.
WHY, WHY are you worried that "you have done something."

You deserve to be treated with respect and honesty.
Get to the bottom of what is going on. If he doesn't come clean and give you a proper explanation, move on. You deserve better. :yes:
Click to expand...

Agree completely!!
 
#15
LucreziaCA said:
Sweetie, I am concerned about your perspective here.
He is acting like a jerk- HE IS. Not you.
WHY, WHY are you worried that "you have done something."

You deserve to be treated with respect and honesty.
Get to the bottom of what is going on. If he doesn't come clean and give you a proper explanation, move on. You deserve better. :yes:
Click to expand...

DITTO!!....HE needs to be honest and stop wasting your time!
 
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