Perfectionists and H
- Thread starter beaumonde
- Start date
I'm not a perfectionist. And I know a person who is. They DO expect the perfect experience, but not only of the product. They want the best service, the best courtesy from SA's if they want to buy something etc. I know that you may be able to get the best product from H, but not always the best courtesy and the best service...so I know he'd get stressed out anyway!
Not a perfectionist. I've seen enough flaws with Hermes as well as Lalique, Daum, Royal Copenhagen, Chanel, LV....and everyone else that I just don't believe it exists outside of God's hands.
Now would I be ticked if I wanted a Birkin, and I saw things on a bag for sale that never should have allowed it to pass a quality inspection? Yeah.
Now would I be ticked if I wanted a Birkin, and I saw things on a bag for sale that never should have allowed it to pass a quality inspection? Yeah.
I dont regard myself as a perfectionist in general, but if I buy something I consider high end, not discounted, I have paid full price for etc. I expect that product to be 100% as I would like, I will not accept second best. It will make me think about it for ages, I would end up getting a replacement, for me, peace of mind is priceless.
But
For a cheap item, discounted anything, I am like "Thank you, gimme" Lol!
But
For a cheap item, discounted anything, I am like "Thank you, gimme" Lol!
It's hard being a perfectionist when you have kids and animals in the house! Unfortunately, because of that, my perfectionism is now channelled into the only place it can go--my bags. It's why I have a hard time buying used and why I get upset with myself when even my preloved kelly with preexisting scratch gets a new ding on it
. But grades in college? Oh no, no perfectionism there; I like to say, I graduated in the top of the bottom half of my class
. But grades in college? Oh no, no perfectionism there; I like to say, I graduated in the top of the bottom half of my classYep, I'm a perfectionist... But mainly regarding my work. If I tackle something I have a hard time considering it finished... there is always a way to make it better.
Last edited:
I totally agree. If I spent my money hard earned money mind you, I would like it to be perfect. But perfectionist no.
About 20 yrs ago I worked at Bloomies(handbags,Ha) The woman that wanted a Coach bag without a scratch (even though the leather at that time was suppose to scratch and patina) drove me crazy. Had me running up and down the stairs to the stockroom. Chanel customers never did that.
So some are really picky others are not.
I thought the tie between perfectionism and OCD/addictions was interesting. I'm a perfectionist for sure - and do get a bit upset when I discover flaws in things I've created (i.e. my work) or flaws I've inflicted on things I've spent a considerable sum on or that could not be easily replaced. Almost every designer bag I've owned and used, for example, could be sold months or years later in "like new" condition because I am so meticulous with certain things. I don't lose sleep, believe me, but if the flaw can be fixed, I usually choose to do so.
I was well taken care of as a child, but always had "discount store" clothes and shoes until I started working myself, and my wardrobe shortcomings were noted by some of my more insensitive classmates. That's part of what I attribute my expensive bag habit to (25 years later..."I'll show YOU, Suzy!"). I'm sure there's a myriad of other reasons to support my compulsions. Both parents are perfectionists in different ways, so I was probably doomed from the start. Husband is a perfectionist too. Oh dear... It DOES make it hard to accept anything other that what you think should be. I think the key is to recognize it, and ask yourself how much it really matters in the scheme of things. This is something I am challenged with to some degree every day. For me, it is all about being in control.
This is a great thread - I like unraveling the reasons behind what people think and how they behave. If I had a second career, it would definitely be psychology.
I was well taken care of as a child, but always had "discount store" clothes and shoes until I started working myself, and my wardrobe shortcomings were noted by some of my more insensitive classmates. That's part of what I attribute my expensive bag habit to (25 years later..."I'll show YOU, Suzy!"). I'm sure there's a myriad of other reasons to support my compulsions. Both parents are perfectionists in different ways, so I was probably doomed from the start. Husband is a perfectionist too. Oh dear... It DOES make it hard to accept anything other that what you think should be. I think the key is to recognize it, and ask yourself how much it really matters in the scheme of things. This is something I am challenged with to some degree every day. For me, it is all about being in control.
This is a great thread - I like unraveling the reasons behind what people think and how they behave. If I had a second career, it would definitely be psychology.
I'm not a perfectionist. Intense, ambitious, and driven - yes; perfectionist, absolutely not. Needing everything to be perfect = ineffectiveness. I think perfectionism is routed in insecurity and self esteem issues, disguised as "high standards."
Per tbestes' point - here's an excerpt from wikopedia's piece on shopping addiction disorder:
This disorder is often linked to emotional deprivations in childhood, an inability to tolerate negative feelings, the need to fill an internal void, excitement seeking, excessive dependency, approval seeking, perfectionism, general impulsiveness and compulsiveness, and the need to gain control (DeSarbo and Edwards 1996, Faber et al. 1987, Benson, 2000). Compulsive buying seems to represent a search for self in people whose identity is neither firmly felt nor dependable. Most shopaholics try to counteract feelings of low self-esteem through the emotional lift and momentary euphoria provided by compulsive shopping. These shoppers, who also experience a higher than normal rate of associated disordersdepression, anxiety, substance abuse, eating disorders, and impulse-control disordersmay be using their symptom to self-medicate.
Unfortunately, you see far too much of this in Manhattan, where the obscene amounts of money and time that some women have, allows them to get far into the so-called "self medication" of shopping without any pressure to stop or to get help.
One last thought - is a perfectionist someone who never makes a mistake? If someone is a perfectionist, under this definition, that person would have never bought and sold a bag, because every decision that make would have been perfect. Discuss among yourselves!
Per tbestes' point - here's an excerpt from wikopedia's piece on shopping addiction disorder:
This disorder is often linked to emotional deprivations in childhood, an inability to tolerate negative feelings, the need to fill an internal void, excitement seeking, excessive dependency, approval seeking, perfectionism, general impulsiveness and compulsiveness, and the need to gain control (DeSarbo and Edwards 1996, Faber et al. 1987, Benson, 2000). Compulsive buying seems to represent a search for self in people whose identity is neither firmly felt nor dependable. Most shopaholics try to counteract feelings of low self-esteem through the emotional lift and momentary euphoria provided by compulsive shopping. These shoppers, who also experience a higher than normal rate of associated disordersdepression, anxiety, substance abuse, eating disorders, and impulse-control disordersmay be using their symptom to self-medicate.
Unfortunately, you see far too much of this in Manhattan, where the obscene amounts of money and time that some women have, allows them to get far into the so-called "self medication" of shopping without any pressure to stop or to get help.
One last thought - is a perfectionist someone who never makes a mistake? If someone is a perfectionist, under this definition, that person would have never bought and sold a bag, because every decision that make would have been perfect. Discuss among yourselves!
Last edited:
^^Right on, Jedimaster. I read a couple of books on shopping addiction, and these are definitely recurring themes. One of the suggestions was that people who shop compulsively are trying to establish or maintain an image of perfection that provides a distraction from addressing their own inner flaws (or fill a void, etc. etc.). Certainly an interesting topic.
When I define myself as a "perfectionist" I do not mean to imply that I consider myself perfect by my own standards or anyone else's. It's more about setting unrealistic expectations of myself (that I do not expect of others) and maintaining a constant sense (and image) of control.
I am learning to let go a little bit, though. Maybe there's hope for me yet.
When I define myself as a "perfectionist" I do not mean to imply that I consider myself perfect by my own standards or anyone else's. It's more about setting unrealistic expectations of myself (that I do not expect of others) and maintaining a constant sense (and image) of control.
I am learning to let go a little bit, though. Maybe there's hope for me yet.