Wibble . . . wobble . . . whoops! At the most basic level, there is only one way to walk in high heels. Put one foot in front of the other and go for it. The mechanics have not changed for at least 2m years, when knuckle-dragging was superseded by bipedalism. What has changed in that time are the shoes. Thanks to fashion, not evolution, heels have never been higher. Five years ago, few shops stocked shoes higher than 4in — because women wouldn’t buy them. Now 6in heels with hulking platforms and multiple straps are flying off the shelves, while demand for sensible kitten heels has plummeted.
Designs are becoming ever more extreme: witness Madonna’s recent red-carpet stroll in a pair of pistol-heel Chanel sandals. (Students of stiletto semaphore should note that she slipped into these killer heels the night before she announced her divorce.)
As well as becoming more extreme, shoes have also become more treacherous. It’s as if designers and customers are engaged in an ever-escalating game of dare, and the forfeit is a nasty tumble. Even catwalk models, who are paid huge amounts to make walking in heels look easy, are having trouble staying upright in the fierce new shoes. Three fell from their lofty sling-backs at the
Prada show in Milan recently, and those who managed to stay upright wobbled their way along the catwalk like newborn foals.
Despite the hazards, the trend for super-high heels shows no sign of abating. A gym in New York has even launched a stiletto class. For health and safety reasons, they can only teach walking and dancing in heels for 15 minutes at a time (which tells you a lot about this new trend), while the rest of the class focuses on strengthening the legs and calves to make walking in heels easier.
Precisely why shoes have become the ultimate fetish object of our times is open for debate. One economist has attributed the fierce shoe boom to women’s desire to reassert themselves after male bankers made a mess of the world. Indeed, the queen of Jimmy Choo, Tamara Mellon, equates heels with power. “Super-high heels provide instant stature and empowerment, and the more you wear them the more comfortable you feel in them,” she says. A fierce pair of heels certainly gets a woman noticed. When Gwyneth Paltrow made her comeback as a sexy screen siren, she did it atop a pair of towering Zanottis.
Even men are getting in on the act. Marc Jacobs took his bow at Louis Vuitton wearing stack-heeled booties. “I’ve always wanted to be taller, which is the real reason I wore them. I also thought I can show that I, too, will suffer for fashion,” he said afterwards.
At least he could walk in his heels. There is no more dispiriting sight than a woman struggling in her shoes. All the sex, power and advantage that heels promise evaporates with every wibble.
1 To cut down on wobble factor, make sure the shoes fityou properly before buying them, and strap them firmly to your feet.
2 The chunkier the heel, the more secure you will feel. The more spindly and strappy, the tougher they will be to teeter in. Do consider platform soles — they take the arch ache out of wearing tall shoes and have made super heights (such as Louis Vuitton’s 7in court shoes) achievable.
3 Don’t make it any harder than it already is by wearing slippery socks or tights with strappy high heels. The toes need to gain some purchase on the shoe, otherwise your whole edifice becomes like a building with unstable foundations (it was the addition of a little cotton inner sock that felled the models on the Prada catwalk).
4 Confidence is the key to looking good in heels. Show no fear. Lean back, stand tall, stretch your leg out in front and imagine that you are walking in flats. Swinging your hips helps with momentum.
5 Plan your heel-wearing strategically. Limit the time you spend in them. For example, walk to work in flats, then change into heels in the office. Always carry a pair of emergency flats (roll-up ballet pumps are very handbag-friendly).
6 Prevention is better than cure. If you know you are in for a prolonged and unavoidable period of heel-wearing, take a Nurofen.
7 Avoid uneven and sloping surfaces (cobbles and heels don’t mix). Don’t walk down stairs, use the lift instead.
8 Use a friend as a crutch. Cling on to them for extra stability.
9 The best way to walk in high heels is to do no walking at all. Set aside a taxi slush fund.
10 Finally, don’t moan. It spoils the elegance. Heels hurt. You knew that when you put them on. If you are going to suffer for fashion, do it in silence.
How they rate: Extreme heels put to the test
YSL TRIBUTE: 6in
Monika Lis, 23, hotel host My job is to meet and greet everybody who arrives at the Andaz hotel and serve them a drink at check-in. This means I’m on my feet for eight and a half hours without sitting down. When my colleagues saw the YSL Tributes, they couldn’t believe I was actually going to wear them for work. As I usually wear heels on the job — admittedly, my limit is 3in, I’m already 5ft 11in — I was willing to give it a go. At first, I was surprised how comfy they felt, and it wasn’t too hard to balance, as long as I swung my hips when I walked. They looked great, but you could hardly see them under my straight-leg trousers — and none of the hotel guests even noticed them. I think they were wasted at work, not to mention the fact that I felt like the Eiffel Tower, peering down at everyone I greeted. After two hours, I was getting tired and the dreaded “pinch” was settling in. I think I could have gone the whole day, but the damage would have put me out of action for the rest of the week. I’d love a pair of shoes like this to wear out on the town, although my boyfriend — who’s already shorter than me — isn’t so sure.
Tribute heels, £415, by Yves Saint Laurent
LOUBOUTIN ALTADAMA: 5½
Charley Brinton, 33, mother of Olive As the mum of a very spirited toddler, heels are usually out of the question, and my daughter seemed to think so, too. When I put on my Louboutin shoes in the morning, Olive looked at me with concern and promptly fetched my regular flats. I wished I was jumping in a cab to Claridge’s for breakfast, but instead I had to walk Olive to her childminder. It usually takes me 10 minutes, but this morning it took an extra 15, and as I tottered along, clinging to the buggy, even the local teens thought I was funny. I work part-time from home, and I’ve never been so happy to sit down at my desk and rest my feet. Come the afternoon, it was time to collect Olive and make our usual trip to the playground. There I quickly discovered that the spongy ground under the swings definitely wasn’t made for heels — but at least it was a soft landing. I looked enviously at the other’s mums’ ballet pumps and Ugg boots, and I definitely got the impression they were looking oddly at me. By the time I was home and making supper, my feet were screaming out for cosy slippers, but I found that, strangely, I didn’t want to take off my heels. It was nice to get some attention for a change, and although the shoes restricted my ability to do day-to-day mummy stuff, they added a bit of rare “yummy” into the mix.
Snakeskin Altadama heels, £520, by Christian Louboutin
MARNI PLATFORMS: 5in
Anna Jean Hughes, 24, production assistant As I clambered into my block-heel Marni platforms in the morning, I realised I’d exceeded my ideal height of 5ft 11in, and was wobbling about at a lofty 6ft 2in. Glancing in the mirror, I was stunned to see a pin-legged glamazon, the metallic platforms twinkling on my feet. But any fantasies of catwalk elegance were swiftly quashed as I walked hard into the beam above my door and collapsed in a heap on the floor. Things escalated when my teeter to the Tube caused a group of schoolchildren to encircle me, though I think that had more to do with my bent-kneed impression of a baby giraffe about to topple than the shoes themselves. I love these stilts, but they’re problematic. Though the pain was minimal, they made me lazy; I e-mailed my colleagues all day instead of walking 10 yards to speak to them in person; and lunch was al desko, as the thought of mincing to Itsu filled me with dread. Despite the glorious compliments (“I had no idea you had model legs,” was a personal favourite) and a sneaky bottom pinch in the lift, they did, in fact, tie me to my desk, and all I could think of was my mother’s voice saying: “Long nails and high heels only prove that the wearer does absolutely nothing.”
Block heels, £325, by Marni
THE NEW BRAND TO LOVE
Keep your eyes open for Bionda Castana, the brand hotly tipped as the new Zanottis, and in a surprisingly mild heel height. This season’s strappy Kika sandals proved a huge hit with fashion editors, and pre-orders for S/S 2009 have already come in from Alexa Chung, Charlize Theron and Scarlett Johansson. They hit Browns in December, but if you can’t wait, get on the waiting list at Larizia (020 7722 5999).
Source
anyone heard anything about bionda castana?
Some ankle-strengthening exercises also couldn't hurt: 
It gets you use to them quite quickly!
