**Hermes Chat**

[sf_newyorker]

Apropos of nothing really, anyone else ever wonder why they bother trying to answer questions on this forum? I am feeling that "it's pointless" feeling and it's made me very sad today. Usually I am happy to have spent years with Hermès, to have gathered small smidgens of knowledge, and to try to answer PMs, etc., but lately.....I dunno.

Anyone else feel this way?

Not pointless at all! Your insight, and those of other OG and non-OG members who consistently post meaningful responses are invaluable to this forum. And very appreciated!

I’m not an OG, but I’ve been a lurker since 2011/2012, before officially registering as a member in 2015. Sure, I’ve seen shifts in attitude and tone on the forum in the 10 years. But what made me stick to the forum (alternately in small and big doses) is the information you and others have selflessly shared.

When I decided to invest time, energy and money into H, I didn’t need to ask a single question on this sub-forum. All I needed to know was already answered in some fashion on the forum. Thanks to you and others!

And so I selfishly hope you continue to post.

 

[textilegirl]

Add me to the list of people who deeply appreciate all of the experience and wisdom that you @QuelleFromage and other OGs are willing to share. I’ve learned so much, and still look forward to those posts. The repetition is sometimes tedious, and the attitudes are sometimes less tolerant than they should be, but then there are the volynka discussions, and the box leather deep dive, and the merits of of various under-the- radar bags, and pics of whatever @880 is wearing, that keep me tuned in. Many thanks to all.

 

[miss mitzi]

Apropos of nothing really, anyone else ever wonder why they bother trying to answer questions on this forum? I am feeling that "it's pointless" feeling and it's made me very sad today. Usually I am happy to have spent years with Hermès, to have gathered small smidgens of knowledge, and to try to answer PMs, etc., but lately.....I dunno.

Anyone else feel this way?

Oh no! Please don’t feel that way, although I see why. :hug

As a H newbie, I have deep appreciation of you taking time answering questions and share your H knowledge. I learned so much and I enjoy reading your replies. :heart

 

[880]

@lilflobowl Thank you for your kind words. @QuelleFromage, I am immediately reminded of the lyrics Of a song from one of my favorite shows, Wicked, ”My road of good intentions, Led where such roads always lead, No good deed, Goes unpunished.” I find that some frustrated Hermes shoppers may want commiseration, not advice and may lash out. Oops, you answered before my post came out. Yes, sadly, the veil of decency has fallen recently in a lot of aspects in our society. As a result, I look at French Bulldog, Bulldog IG reels all day long.

Absolutely, girlfriend
I remember that plenty of members — many of whom no longer post— were generous with their knowledge
when I started out. I would just say, others, including me, took a long hiatus of many years when enough was enough.
You can always jump back in. Many thanks to all of you who tagged me. I appreciate all of you too.

 

[carrie8]

I am sorry that I don't post much because I suck in English ( it's my 3rd language). But I devour the posts of you guys @QuelleFromage @880 @sf_newyorker @haute okole @tinkerbell68 @maxroxxherhandbags @Prada Prince and others. I appreciated it very much

 

[maxroxxherhandbags]

@QuelleFromage You are very much loved and respected by many (heck! I really look forward to seeing your posts).
Please don't let it get you down-your fans will be sad to see less of you here.
I do see some attitudes that suck on this forum just as I do at work, on the subway, walking on the street..
Try to not let them grind you down.
Your contributions mean a great deal to us
Big hug!
Maxine

 

[Veritybelle]

@QuelleFromage I am with the countless others who have posted replies (and all those who might not have posted) who deeply appreciate your generosity on this forum and would miss you if you chose to withdraw. JMO, it’s a “small-p” political statement when the good, kind, knowledgeable, friendly, funny posters consciously refuse to vacate this space. As someone who has been on this forum for only a short time, I can say that I would never have bothered to sign on if it were not for the tone set by you and other longstanding members. I hope you will continue to take up lots of space here!

 

[lilflobowl]

Thanks, all.

It's not so much people re-asking questions that were already answered, nor do I really expect tons of thanks (although it's nice when I lean in hard for someone). It's how mean some people are (not even just to me - to everyone), random post deletions for reasons I don't understand, and people getting mad because someone disagrees with statements of absolutes.

It's not a "community" anymore. I have over 100 people on "ignore" now, and it's only for two reasons: people who are almost invariably mean to other posters, and racism. I said something about this change of tone (the meanness, not the racism - that unfortunately will always come out on the Internet) in the OG forum and got a couple very "haughty" responses, including that certain folks are experts who must be respected, and that people who can't afford Hermès should just stay away from it. (?!).

I have also noticed that many of the OG H collectors are no longer participating here. The wonderful things people used to share - no longer. The reference guides are dated, scanty, and/or contain misinformation and the folks who were deep contributors are largely gone.

It's not that I expect thanks. I guess I expect a friendly, informational group that's excited about H? (I do see this in the scarfies btw.)

I guess I just don't see the point of sharing here anymore. End of my sob story

I get what you mean.
I think the general hostility is borne from a combination of a few things: increased general stress, greater inaccessibility to bags, impatience, entitlement, self-centeredness, etc. I realise that a lot of newbies come in, ask questions and expect answers that they want to hear, even though pages and pages of posts prior have already answered their questions.

Maybe we need to create a H thread in the OG section, maybe that might bring some of the OG back? #justsaying

 

[allanrvj]

I've been here since MaiTai and bababebi didn't have their respective businesses yet. and I'm still here, along with a handful of real OGs of the H forum (*waves to periogirl28, duna, ClassicTwist, papertiger, and some others*). I can't speak for them personally, but I'm still here because I'm always on the lookout for what Hermès is up to. and that's it.

anyway
I don't think looking for a sense of community here is the right way to approach the forum. like I said, my recommended approach is look at it like a buffet. you don't have to put everything on your plate, which means you don't have to read everything. there are things you don't like, and you don't have to engage with it. it's just there. and if you stay long enough at the forum, you will notice that questions just repeat themselves.

you are under no obligation to answer them.

somebody more eager, with more patience, will answer the question.

in my years, the forum had never ran out of an expert at any point in time. look at @r luvs h. seemingly coming out of nowhere and yet bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to share their knowledge.

so there's no need to lament on why the forum is the way it is, why isn't it like that, why can't it be more like this, etc etc. the forum has been like this since ever. I don't know where people got the idea that it was a more fun place before, as if there was a Golden Age of the Hermès subforum. sure, people were more generous with their SA information and such back in the 2000's, but that has more to do with Hermès's popularity (which was still gaining traction by then) rather than the forum itself.

people here have always been a mixed bag of near-saint generous kind angels, and utterly vile racist, classist, a-holes you have ever met online. why do you think MaiTai and many others left? hmm?

x

 

[haute okole]

Although I have been on TPF since 2007, I have concentrated on the H forum for about a decade. The H thread is by far my favorite and have some really fabulous real friends because of TPF and the H forum. There are other threads that makes me question the value of social media, like Money Talks, I don’t bother going there because I learn nothing and am not interested in how much someone spends on coffee EVERYDAY. Snore. The H forum has some real knowledgeable and helpful OGs with encyclopedic knowledge, yes, I am looking at you @acrowcounted and @880, who is building her dream museum like closet! I cannot wait to scan my retina so I can enter that guided space.

@allanrvj, I agree that TPF is a buffet and for my mental health I stay away from stuff that does not enhance my mood, does not delight or entertain me. I go straight to dessert, which is for me the H wildlife thread And H latest purchases. Edit to add, I would love to see a thread called Decorate with H, that would be such good eye candy….if you have good taste. Hahaha.

 

[Meta]

Edit to add, I would love to see a thread called Decorate with H, that would be such good eye candy….if you have good taste. Hahaha.

There's already one here, even if it's mostly tableware but there's a few pics of pillows, throws, how one uses their H trays, and even H wallpaper.

 

[Lilfrychicken]

Apropos of nothing really, anyone else ever wonder why they bother trying to answer questions on this forum? I am feeling that "it's pointless" feeling and it's made me very sad today. Usually I am happy to have spent years with Hermès, to have gathered small smidgens of knowledge, and to try to answer PMs, etc., but lately.....I dunno.

Anyone else feel this way?

I appreciate you!

 

[lilflobowl]

Although I have been on TPF since 2007, I have concentrated on the H forum for about a decade. The H thread is by far my favorite and have some really fabulous real friends because of TPF and the H forum. There are other threads that makes me question the value of social media, like Money Talks, I don’t bother going there because I learn nothing and am not interested in how much someone spends on coffee EVERYDAY. Snore. The H forum has some real knowledgeable and helpful OGs with encyclopedic knowledge, yes, I am looking at you @acrowcounted and @880, who is building her dream museum like closet! I cannot wait to scan my retina so I can enter that guided space.

hahah I know who you're referring to. I think she uses it for personal bookkeeping.

@allanrvj a buffet is a good analogy but I do think that there is a certain sense of community beyond it. But of course it's totally dependent on the individual how they treat the forum and their own experiences.

 

[TankerToad]

I've been here since MaiTai and bababebi didn't have their respective businesses yet. and I'm still here, along with a handful of real OGs of the H forum (*waves to periogirl28, duna, ClassicTwist, papertiger, and some others*). I can't speak for them personally, but I'm still here because I'm always on the lookout for what Hermès is up to. and that's it.

anyway
I don't think looking for a sense of community here is the right way to approach the forum. like I said, my recommended approach is look at it like a buffet. you don't have to put everything on your plate, which means you don't have to read everything. there are things you don't like, and you don't have to engage with it. it's just there. and if you stay long enough at the forum, you will notice that questions just repeat themselves.

you are under no obligation to answer them.

somebody more eager, with more patience, will answer the question.

in my years, the forum had never ran out of an expert at any point in time. look at @r luvs h. seemingly coming out of nowhere and yet bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to share their knowledge.

so there's no need to lament on why the forum is the way it is, why isn't it like that, why can't it be more like this, etc etc. the forum has been like this since ever. I don't know where people got the idea that it was a more fun place before, as if there was a Golden Age of the Hermès subforum. sure, people were more generous with their SA information and such back in the 2000's, but that has more to do with Hermès's popularity (which was still gaining traction by then) rather than the forum itself.

people here have always been a mixed bag of near-saint generous kind angels, and utterly vile racist, classist, a-holes you have ever met online. why do you think MaiTai and many others left? hmm?

x

Absolutely love this post.
Thank you @allanrvj You are wise.
And it’s a reality check.
I’ve been here a long time (2008), and boy do I remember some real unkindness and drama by some members to each other when I started - but still mixed in with real sharing and knowledge - and such generosity.

It’s a mixed bag- then and now.
I’ve made friends on this forum but also been shocked by other members on-line ugliness to other members.
Just why?

Still I keep coming back: to check in, learn, share where I can, and will always very pleased to see the OGs that have earned a place in my heart.
It’s like having a coffee with old friends, who like some of the same things I do.
We used to say we “mindless obsess”-
And that’s fun sometimes - it’s a place not to be judged for our little obsessions.

Just a shout out to so many that have contributed and continue to contribute positivity to this forum.
You are appreciated.

 

[TankerToad]

Although I have been on TPF since 2007, I have concentrated on the H forum for about a decade. The H thread is by far my favorite and have some really fabulous real friends because of TPF and the H forum. There are other threads that makes me question the value of social media, like Money Talks, I don’t bother going there because I learn nothing and am not interested in how much someone spends on coffee EVERYDAY. Snore. The H forum has some real knowledgeable and helpful OGs with encyclopedic knowledge, yes, I am looking at you @acrowcounted and @880, who is building her dream museum like closet! I cannot wait to scan my retina so I can enter that guided space.

@allanrvj, I agree that TPF is a buffet and for my mental health I stay away from stuff that does not enhance my mood, does not delight or entertain me. I go straight to dessert, which is for me the H wildlife thread And H latest purchases. Edit to add, I would love to see a thread called Decorate with H, that would be such good eye candy….if you have good taste. Hahaha.

Another excellent post!
Waving to you from the H thread -
Okay maybe I’m in the VCA thread, too
Okay okay maybe the Chanel RTW- but whose counting