Finally quit my job

D

dlovely51

Member
Oct 25, 2006
427
0
#1
Well yesterday was my last day on my job. Maybe some of you remember my posts way back about my struggles with my boss. I'm happy to be done, but it was really weird. I had so many people wanting to take me out to lunch, people in other departments wanting me to keep in touch.

The co-workers I sit around were really great-saying how much fun it was to have a jovial spirit around, and they would miss my laugh and smile. It was nice, but because of what I went through with my boss, I feel a little bitter and battered.

As nice as all of these folks have been-from contributing to raising money for charity to supporting my business, I'm just so angry how I was treated and how I was blocked from moving into another position.

My "new diagnosis" -the on the one that affected this job was a sleeping disorder. So during this time, I'm trying to adjust to taking all these pills on schedule, and trying to figure out what my next steps will be.

I'm going back to school full-time, expanding my business, and will hopefully have a part-time job to help with daily expenses, but is it weird that I just want to forget the last 10 months and block it out completely? The people who enforce ADA, said I should file charges, but I'm so emotionally drained and angry.

Should I file charges, or should I just forget everything, cut contacts and move forward? That's my usual way of handling things, when bad things happen-just block it out-but I know other people with the same diagnosis who are killing themselves to be at work, and others who have said its nearly impossible to get accommodations. Even though it wouldn't help me, it could my friends in the long run. What do you guys think? I know I/m rambling but I just needed to decompress from the last month.:sad:
 
#4
Hmmmmm....I think you need to take care of yourself, first and foremost. I don't have the whole story - but you're now thinking of everyone else again first, rather than yourself - which is why you stayed in this job for so long, no?
Now is "you" time. You're not offending anyone by not taking care of the world. Everyone has a responsiblity to themselves, and you need to take a rest and a good long break to decompress.....
 
#5
Hey Gal, it is kinda sad that everyone else was nice to you except for your boss.... it makes it harder to leave a place when you feel like it was just one Ass*** that was making things miserable. you don't wnt to give them that power to make you leave but unfortunately, bosses can wreck somuch hell on your life.... i know what that's like =P I can't believe your boss blocked a transfer but i've seen enough of that going on that it doesn't shock me. I'm just so mad at your boss for you!!!

i tend to block out stuff as well. like with my past relationship, i pretty much blocked it out most of the time in order to deal with the pain and anger. i just block out as a coping mechanism unless i have to actually deal with it daily (like now). I'm not over it and i just have to keep on blocking it cos once i start thinking about it i get SO MAD!!!

As for suing them. well, there are laws in place to protect people. BUt you know the reality is that, justice and remedy isn't always available to us even though companies are breaking the law. I would LOVE to sue my ex employer. they blatently violated disclosure laws but i can't. because once i sue, no one is going to employ me and i can't afford to keep on paying a lawyer to go up against them since they have deeeeeep pockets. and it sucks but that's kind of the reality of things. it's a personal decision. don't do it to protect others, do it if you really feel like you want to do it and if you are willing to take the risk that you are tainted once you sue them.

i know this must be tough, i hope the business, school and part time job come together nicely soon and things will feel like it's getting better. could you get insurance through your school? maybe it's worth taking a few more classes or work part time at school if that's what it takes to get your insurance.

hugs and :heart:, Bubbles
 
#7
Thanks once again everyone,
Jchiria and Bubbles, I think you really hit the nail on the head. I was happy when I came into work on my last day, and sad when I left because I didn't realize that my co-workers were really sad for me.

I went to church today and the topic was "seize the moment" and talked about having a plan and mission in life and how God will lead you if you let Him into who you ought to be and where you should be.

It's been a rough year, things didn't turn out the way I thought they would, but I need to use some "street smarts" as you suggested Bubbles, and take care of myself as you said Jchiria.

I do have COBRA and its relatively affordable right now for me, so that's not an issue.

Thanks everyone for you well wishes, and I'm starting to really feel better now about my future.:smile:
 
#8
Hey dlovely,
I hope you feel better now that you are free from the negative environment at work. I do not know about lawsuits, but do think that my BF is right when he says 'Never burn a bridge'. Do you have an exit interview with your former employer? If you do, then you should really talk to them about what went wrong, etc. so things will be OK between both of you. You never know when you might need some recommendations from that place. I say keep it positive and use this experience to your advantage. Show them that you have the means to sue them, but will not, but do want to stay in contact, even though things did not work out.

I know it is very hard, and I probably could not do that, but it has worked for BF who has worked all over the sports industry. They tend to move around a lot and know each other. Perhaps your situation is different and you will never hear from these people again, but it is just my opinion.

Take good care and keep us posted on how you are doing! :smile:
 
#9
gr8heart said:
Hey dlovely,
I hope you feel better now that you are free from the negative environment at work. I do not know about lawsuits, but do think that my BF is right when he says 'Never burn a bridge'. Do you have an exit interview with your former employer? If you do, then you should really talk to them about what went wrong, etc. so things will be OK between both of you. You never know when you might need some recommendations from that place. I say keep it positive and use this experience to your advantage. Show them that you have the means to sue them, but will not, but do want to stay in contact, even though things did not work out.

I know it is very hard, and I probably could not do that, but it has worked for BF who has worked all over the sports industry. They tend to move around a lot and know each other. Perhaps your situation is different and you will never hear from these people again, but it is just my opinion.

Take good care and keep us posted on how you are doing! :smile:
Click to expand...

Hi Gr8heart,
That is sound advice, and I did work in a small circle. I was the model employee and didn't complain or trash my boss. I had to have the shortest exit interview ever-because it was night in day in terms of they didn't care about what I said had to change for me to stay. I just kept very pc and said, it's a great company, I would have stayed if I was allowed to move, but my boss and I don't agree on anything when it comes to my work, so I feel its best to leave. I have a lawyer friend that told me not to say too much because they could use it against you later, and they are looking to see if you have a case to sue them (they actually ask you that on the survey. LOL).

But I don't have the time or money, or the energy to relive what has happened, and what's done is done. As bad as things were for me, I truly did like my coworkers.

I'm actually going to hang out with some next Friday. That's the part I was talking about-should I go, or just let them be in my past. But I'm a person of my word, and I'll go. The funny thing is the guy that is organizing this was my boss' pet, but he acted very decently to me by helping when I got stuck, and by keeping in the loop about things. He knew what was going on, but he did a really good job of supporting me in a way that wasn't obvious to my boss. Of course I helped him out a lot when he first started, and I thought he was ungrateful-but like you said never burn bridges.
 
#11
Congratulations on the new job, that's great!!! Looks like things are looking up already!!! And good on you for being strong and taking a stand for yourself in the other situation. I'm not aware of the details, but you've done the right thing by moving forward. You're a strong gal!!!
 
#15
Just wanted to wish you the best. I do want to tell you to be careful what you say around the "boss's pet" just in case kwim?
I walked off my job of 10 years. Had to leave since my health was in jeopardy. The job could have cared less how they treated the employees & I have absolutely NO regrets for how I handled it.
You are ready to move forward to the next phase. Best wishes to you!
 
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