Books & Music Concert Etiquette Question

Dawn

Dawn

seriously?
Moderator
O.G.
Sep 2, 2006
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#1
Last night I went to see Boy George and Cyndi Lauper at a wonderful outdoor venue called Wolftrap. You can bring coolers of food and wine and beer, spread out your blanket or chairs in the lawn, or buy tickets for seats in the pavilion. I've attached a pic of a typical crowded show and the red circle is where we were standing. We got there too late to put down a blanket on the lawn which was fine, we were up and dancing in the back!

We were in the common area behind the crowd. It was LOUD there and everyone was chatting and drinking and being merry. During one of Cyndi Lauper's monologues (she kind of went off on tangents, not sure what she was saying most of the time), three friends(we're all 40+ years old) and I were chatting and laughing. A woman about 15 feet from us stomped over to us, put her fingers to her lips and said SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! and stomped away. :huh:

We were all so surprised. We weren't being obnoxious or shouting or screaming.None of us could say anything before she stomped back to her spot but holy cow.

This was not my first concert and certainly not my last. I understand people getting upset if you are screaming or at a show where silence is important. But this was a big, crowded outdoor concert where most everyone was talking and laughing.

I really wanted to talk to her and say dude why didn't you just ask us to take it down a notch instead of treating us like we're you're kids? But I just left it alone... ;)

Do you expect people to be quiet around you when you're at an outdoor rock concert?
 

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#2
First off Wolftrap isn't an outdoor, lets-get-rowdy rock concert venue. It's a music park that features nationally known performers that span the gamut from opera to folk to classical and in general they keep the decibels out of the ear-bleed range. Concert goers come to listen to the music, not to listen to the performance being overwhelmed by the screech and chatter of partiers. So yes it is an etiquette breach to make so much noise you distract the people around you from the performance and they must you ask you to keep it down. The fact that Cyndi Lauper was at the moment talking and not playing music is irrelevant. For many performers the talk between songs is as an important part of their performance as the music, even if it sounds scatter-brained at times. You say that people in the common area around you were talking, but you folks must have been making an exceptional amount of noise for someone to shush you. At an outdoor music venue behave as you would inside a concert hall with respect for other concert goers listening to the performance, and keep the disruptive noise to a minimum. That means if you must talk on a cell phone take it to the back of the park. Ditto if you have a manicure emergency and must clip and file your nails all through Don Giovanni. :smile:
 
#3
Where did I say that Wolftrap is a "let's get rowdy rock concert venue?" :search: I said it is a wonderful outdoor venue and that where we were standing was loud.

I'm one of those people who cringe when loud friends are super loud in inappropriate places and notice if people start to get annoyed. No one else around us paid us any attention, glared at us, shushed us, or made a comment.

You are also making a lot of assumptions. We were not "partiers" unless you equate partiers to one glass of wine. We were not screeching. We were chatting and laughing. Could it have gotten a bit too loud for five seconds when we all laughed at the same time at something? Maybe. I would not call it an exceptional amount of noise.

My biggest issue with the whole interaction was that this woman could have very easily just have walked over and said hey, do you mind keeping it down a bit? That's a million times more mature than Shushing and stomping away.

I don't disagree that people are there to hear the music. I see a difference between going to something at the Kennedy Center vs. Wolftrap. I'm not saying you get naked and run the aisles at Wolftrap but it's a lot less reserved than the Kennedy Center. We can disagree and that's fine - I appreciate your input. I just didn't appreciate putting words in my mouth.
 
#4
I've been to Wolftrap several times.

I don't think you did anything wrong.

I always see the open space, as the more chatty/picnic, less structured space, so I typically get seats in the seated area.

same goes for Nissan or I think it's now called Merriweather Post Pavillion.

Now, if you wee at a play or an orchestral performance, that would have been another thing.;)
 
#5
Ladybug09 said:
I've been to Wolftrap several times.

I don't think you did anything wrong.

I always see the open space, as the more chatty/picnic, less structured space, so I typically get seats in the seated area.

same goes for Nissan or I think it's now called Merriweather Post Pavillion.

Now, if you wee at a play or an orchestral performance, that would have been another thing.;)
Click to expand...

Totally agree!
I think Nissan is now Jiffy Lube Live in Bristow and Merriweather is in MD :smile:
 
#8
I've been to Wolftrap and do not think you did anything wrong.

When I've sat out on the lawn, I expected that people would talk/laugh/sing along/dance etc.

I think the woman could have handled it much better. Like you said, she could have asked you all to keep it down instead of shushing you like children. Smh.
 
#9
hotshot said:
This lady could & should have handled herself better & just asked politely to
keep your noise level down a notch...
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ClassicFab said:
I've been to Wolftrap and do not think you did anything wrong.

When I've sat out on the lawn, I expected that people would talk/laugh/sing along/dance etc.

I think the woman could have handled it much better. Like you said, she could have asked you all to keep it down instead of shushing you like children. Smh.
Click to expand...

Thank you for your input! We are going to the I Love the 90s later this year and are going to get there as early as possible to actually sit on the lawn and not in the asphalt! ;)
 
#11
Ladybug09 said:
This is a major pet peeve of mine, people who feel the need to parent other adults.
Click to expand...

Exactly. I can take criticism and if that woman would have just talked to us like adults, I would have respected it very much. It's not easy to confront something potentially uncomfortable but she made it 10x weirder by shhhhing us.
 
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