Purse peace

[atlantique]

Are you me? Truly resonates with every point you made here, especially to stop when it's not serving you anymore (I realized at one time I had a pattern of constantly checking on bags/ scrolling on websites, even when I don't feel like I want to). Consciously asking myself and be intentional, even in these small scrolling/ browsing habits is really the way to go for me. Only then would I realize to start living life while enjoying things I already have, and stop looking around.

I don't have a powerpoint for mine since I only own six bags atm (went down from 15+ over the past five years), but I found that taking pictures in a somewhat 'editorial' manner helps me to feel good about my collection as a whole (pic below for reference), and to carefully consider whether I want to replace a bag to add another one in. Since all my bags look good in the picture it has successfully stopped me from thinking I need another new bag and trying to fix problems that don't exist

I still look at bags on the internet from time to time, but found myself not wanting to add anything because I got everything covered, from the tiniest to the roomiest that suit my lifestyle and taste (and therefore feel lazy to do research on new things) and also simply don't want to break the 'harmony' of my current collection. Thanks for letting me share!

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You have a beautiful collection! 😍

 

[Antonia]

Are you me? Truly resonates with every point you made here, especially to stop when it's not serving you anymore (I realized at one time I had a pattern of constantly checking on bags/ scrolling on websites, even when I don't feel like I want to). Consciously asking myself and be intentional, even in these small scrolling/ browsing habits is really the way to go for me. Only then would I realize to start living life while enjoying things I already have, and stop looking around.

I don't have a powerpoint for mine since I only own six bags atm (went down from 15+ over the past five years), but I found that taking pictures in a somewhat 'editorial' manner helps me to feel good about my collection as a whole (pic below for reference), and to carefully consider whether I want to replace a bag to add another one in. Since all my bags look good in the picture it has successfully stopped me from thinking I need another new bag and trying to fix problems that don't exist

I still look at bags on the internet from time to time, but found myself not wanting to add anything because I got everything covered, from the tiniest to the roomiest that suit my lifestyle and taste (and therefore feel lazy to do research on new things) and also simply don't want to break the 'harmony' of my current collection. Thanks for letting me share!

View attachment 5944354

This is a great collection of bags-all very classic in style and color!! Love that mini puzzle bag!! Curious what that one beneath the puzzle bag is? I've never seen it!!

 

[pheebspurse]

You have a beautiful collection! 😍

Aww thank you!

This is a great collection of bags-all very classic in style and color!! Love that mini puzzle bag!! Curious what that one beneath the puzzle bag is? I've never seen it!!

Thank you! I really appreciate the complement, especially on colors since I went through couple years of buying/ selling just bcs I didn't feel I got my staple color right! The puzzle is actually the Nano size (they released it some time ago in 2020) and I was surprised to find out such micro bag (that doesn't fit my phone) turned out to be one of my most used bag this winter.

That purse beneath the puzzle is from NY-based brand Ratio Et Motus and they called it the Cosmo bag! Their bags, as far as I know, are made in Italy and the stitching alongside with the quality of the leather is immaculate. I always think of the bag as my version of Birkin/ Kelly, bcs of how prim and proper it is, but with a twist of modern edge

 

[epistolic]

I went through the same cycle as you, and around the same ages. I went from late 20s to turning 30, and I spent a lot of money on a grown up wardrobe as well as a bag collection. I tried on a lot of different style of bags and found what I liked and what worked for me. After decluttering twice, my collection has settled and I haven't gone off hunting for new designs.

Once you know what you like and what works for you, stick to that. Don't go looking for bags that are lesser versions than the ones you have. The majority of bags out there can be appreciated with your eyes, not with your wallet or with ownership. Make sure you check your shopping habits to see if it's becoming a dopamine/addiction cycle where you're chasing the feeling of getting a new bag and not appreciating what you have. My final recommendation is once it stops being fun, that's when you stop. Bags that aren't fun, scrolling when it's not fun, keeping up with latest trends and releases when its not fun - go do other things instead. Go enjoy other hobbies! If you love fashion, you can read up on fashion history. For a while I had to avoid looking at bags and hauls, but now I can look at other people's bags without feeling the temptation.

Thank-you, this is really valuable input! I think some of it is a dopamine/addiction cycle, I feel sometimes I get more excitement clicking "Buy" than actually even receiving the bag or using it in person, which of course just means it was never about the bag, it's about the feeling of acquiring something beautiful. I think I might have to un-subscribe from a lot of the shopping platform emails I get from Mytheresa and the like, that perpetuates the problem a lot!

 

[malachitenine]

In the book 'Habits of a Happy Brain' there is a section about how the endorphin rush fades out so as humans we are motivated to keep finding more food/items and keep going.

Of course in terms of bags, especially ones of luxury prices, this isn't always great for our wallets!

But anyway, 'foraging' is something built into our brains.

 

[poleneinblack]

In the book 'Habits of a Happy Brain' there is a section about how the endorphin rush fades out so as humans we are motivated to keep finding more food/items and keep going.

Of course in terms of bags, especially ones of luxury prices, this isn't always great for our wallets!

But anyway, 'foraging' is something built into our brains.

Thank you for the book recc! I'm still reading In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate, which is about addiction. So many insights on shopping addiction and retail therapy.

 

[malachitenine]

I'm still reading In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate, which is about addiction.

I'll check it out it's an interesting topic, and it's sometimes on my mind (what motivates me, why I shop). Thanks!

 

[*Jenn*]

purse peace. an interesting topic.
i used to often find myself scouring the "show us your newest bag" and "show us what bag you wore today" threads, hoping for inspiration.
which is silly because my wishlist is more than long enough. i have tried to cut back on that.

i have recently come to peace with the notion that many bags are beautiful, but are just not right for me. whether it be lifestyle, finances, wear-ability, etc.
i have many bags that have been on and off my wishlist a dozen+ times. i now recognize that there is a reason for that, and they should stay off.
i used to say i wanted at least one bag from each of the "big" premium designers. now i recognize that is silly.

i am also finding that, as i get older, i don't really give a crap what people think.
i used to chase logo / monogram bags, and i desperately wanted people to see what i had.
then i went through a phase of being embarrassed by carrying bags that were obviously expensive, mostly because of one comment that my SIL made.
now, i proudly carry the bags i own and love.
i'm slowly curating what i have and paring down the items i no longer use, and will slowly replace them with bags that i truly truly love.
i think that within the next 5 years, i will be in purse peace.
(graduating grad school and not having to pay for classes anymore will help, haha!)


bags i love that i will never own:
hermès - birkin 30 - kiwi -- absolutely love, but not realistic financially
celine - belt bag nano -- love them, timeless, but hate how they look once they've been used and start to slouch
chanel - petite shopping tote - black w. silver hardware -- love it but my husband asked me to never purchase anything chanel for personal reasons
polène - numero neuf - black -- i love it and drool everytime i see it, but i just don't think i would reach for it
burberry - clifton small - black -- tbh, i really want something burberry and its the name of my first love, so it is would be sentimental only. but i dont LOVE the bag itself.
saint laurent - sac de jour baby -- i hate the insert. and i know its removable but still just can't do it.

 

[poleneinblack]

purse peace. an interesting topic.
i used to often find myself scouring the "show us your newest bag" and "show us what bag you wore today" threads, hoping for inspiration.
which is silly because my wishlist is more than long enough. i have tried to cut back on that.

i have recently come to peace with the notion that many bags are beautiful, but are just not right for me. whether it be lifestyle, finances, wear-ability, etc.
i have many bags that have been on and off my wishlist a dozen+ times. i now recognize that there is a reason for that, and they should stay off.
i used to say i wanted at least one bag from each of the "big" premium designers. now i recognize that is silly.

i am also finding that, as i get older, i don't really give a crap what people think.
i used to chase logo / monogram bags, and i desperately wanted people to see what i had.
then i went through a phase of being embarrassed by carrying bags that were obviously expensive, mostly because of one comment that my SIL made.
now, i proudly carry the bags i own and love.
i'm slowly curating what i have and paring down the items i no longer use, and will slowly replace them with bags that i truly truly love.
i think that within the next 5 years, i will be in purse peace.
(graduating grad school and not having to pay for classes anymore will help, haha!)


bags i love that i will never own:
hermès - birkin 30 - kiwi -- absolutely love, but not realistic financially
celine - belt bag nano -- love them, timeless, but hate how they look once they've been used and start to slouch
chanel - petite shopping tote - black w. silver hardware -- love it but my husband asked me to never purchase anything chanel for personal reasons
polène - numero neuf - black -- i love it and drool everytime i see it, but i just don't think i would reach for it
burberry - clifton small - black -- tbh, i really want something burberry and its the name of my first love, so it is would be sentimental only. but i dont LOVE the bag itself.
saint laurent - sac de jour baby -- i hate the insert. and i know its removable but still just can't do it.

I had to stop looking at shopping and luxury/handbag videos for a while because I would go off and look up those items immediately. I wanted to spend less time online shopping or browsing. I also got annoyed seeing so much consumerism.

Now I can watch other people's videos and not be tempted at all. I'm happy with what I own, and I can easily think of a bag from my collection I would prefer to use rather than anything I see on other people. I also easily think of reasons why it wouldn't work for me, or why I don't like it. My instinct is to not want bags, instead of want new bags. I don't want to get a bag that I like LESS than what I already own.

For example, Hermes, Celine belt bag/luggage bag, Chanel Tote, YSL Sac De Jour - these are all tote bags to me. I have a small tote and that's more than enough for when I need a tote purse. I personally love the Polene Neuf, and that fulfills a lot of purse needs for me: top handle, medium bag, tote bag, etc, etc. I have the same experience as you do with Burberry. I love YSL as a designer, but the bags just aren't my taste or I don't like them on me. So I've made peace with not owning YSL bags, just like bags from a lot of other brands.

 

[minted5]

Yes, I finally completed my collection for now. I have items for every occasion as well all the SLGs I need/want and am beyond happy and thankful for it!

Here is a breakdown of my purse collection, all LV:

Everyday:
-Double Zip Pochette in Damier Azure - This is a great very lightweight bag that actually fits a good amount. I use it for shopping or times when I want a crossbody option (or if it looks good with my outfit )

-Odeon PM in Monogram - Another great crossbody option, my most used for shopping. I also love the black trimming so I've also used it when going out as well (walking around the city, etc).

-Neverfull in Monogram - I use this mainly when I go to work as I have *everything* in it. I also use it when traveling. I don't use it as my everyday bag anymore bc I feel much safer with one of the above crossbody options.

-Graceful PM in Damier Ebene - my most favorite everyday bag for spring/summer. While not crossbody, it's smaller than the Neverfull so if I have it out while shopping I just keep it on my shoulder.

Dressy:
-Easy Pouch on Strap in black empriente - I love the versatility of this bag with the strap that can be adjusted or the chain.

-Pochette Accessorie in Damier Ebene - a great little shoulder bag for a night out.

I'm working on my jewelry collection this year and might revisit bags next year. Really the only other items that I have on a future wishlist are the Speedy B 20 DE or Monogram and the Alma BB in DE. I opted to skip the Speedy B for now because I do not like the guitar strap.

 

[pursemylipsx]

I switched off last year. Whatever designer handbag it was out there on SM, they have all stopped giving me the "luxurious" feel - does this mean I have managed to achieve "purse peace" ? I switched to luxury skincare and toiletries which gave me back that feeling of treating and improving myself, which was what started me off buying designer handbags. Luckily it's cheaper lol.

 

[Purses & Perfumes]

Someone upthread mentioned the term purse pause. It’s probably a better descriptor of my current collection/situation than purse peace. In the beginning, one collects with a certain intensity but gradually, as the collection fills out with the bags that are needed to meet one’s lifestyle requirements, a slowdown is natural. Limitations of space available, like small closets for example also act as a constraining factor. Being at purse pause or peace is a good thing because it means I am off the acquisition treadmill and focusing on just using and enjoying my bags: planning outings, building outfits that go with my bags, and just appreciating the fact that I own them.

However, it doesn’t mean I won’t ever buy anymore bags: it’s more that any new addition has to really knock my socks off in some way or it’s something that is particularly appealing, or it’s something that has been on my wish list for a long time. Basically the criteria for new additions is more stringent. Also, knowing that my bag collection feels pretty satisfactory at the moment means I’m looking at upgrades in other areas, whether it be footwear, scarves, jewelry or clothing. I guess the shopping bug is ever present, always lurking in the background. The key for me is to keep it as dormant as possible.

 

[cecchetti]

Someone upthread mentioned the term purse pause. It’s probably a better descriptor of my current collection/situation than purse peace. In the beginning, one collects with a certain intensity but gradually, as the collection fills out with the bags that are needed to meet one’s lifestyle requirements, a slowdown is natural. Limitations of space available, like small closets for example also act as a constraining factor. Being at purse pause or peace is a good thing because it means I am off the acquisition treadmill and focusing on just using and enjoying my bags: planning outings, building outfits that go with my bags, and just appreciating the fact that I own them.

However, it doesn’t mean I won’t ever buy anymore bags: it’s more that any new addition has to really knock my socks off in some way or it’s something that is particularly appealing, or it’s something that has been on my wish list for a long time. Basically the criteria for new additions is more stringent. Also, knowing that my bag collection feels pretty satisfactory at the moment means I’m looking at upgrades in other areas, whether it be footwear, scarves, jewelry or clothing. I guess the shopping bug is ever present, always lurking in the background. The key for me is to keep it as dormant as possible.

I’m also at purse pause -I do have a wish list (of 7 or 8 bags) but they are all exotics, which I would buy in the future, some bespoke.

Like you, I’m currently buying jewellery and clothing, although I would buy a bag if I fell in love with one.

My tastes haven’t changed, just my priorities..

 

[Shelby33]

The only purse peace I have found was accepting the fact that I will probably never have it.

 

[Sunshine mama]

Someone upthread mentioned the term purse pause.

However, it doesn’t mean I won’t ever buy anymore bags: it’s more that any new addition has to really knock my socks off in some way or it’s something that is particularly appealing, or it’s something that has been on my wish list for a long time. Basically the criteria for new additions is more stringent. Also, knowing that my bag collection feels pretty satisfactory at the moment means I’m looking at upgrades in other areas, whether it be footwear, scarves, jewelry or clothing. I guess the shopping bug is ever present, always lurking in the background. The key for me is to keep it as dormant as possible.

Exactly how I feel at the moment!