People grabbing your hand/making a fuss over ring

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#18
Metrowestmama said:
It means that she'd rather be understated at work (don't want to call attention to high-end jewelry in a professional setting due to co-workers views, gossip, salaries, raises, perception, etc.) Compared to when she is socializing with friends or out in public, she appreciates the admiration of her piece. At lot of women in the other forums don't carry their Hermes bags to work, for example, but use them outside of work for a similar reason. Hence her answer.
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This is how I am. For my day job, I work in a not-so-great area of the city, and deal with people regularly at my office who are not in the greatest financial shape, some of whom have histories that would lend to an unfavorable outcome if I wore something to get that much attention. Add to that, I often have to dig around in old files, and crawl around in an IT closet. None of which is conducive to bling!

But when I am doing my sidework for my own business, there's also the question of "do I outshine my potential clients?" I have to consider that some brides are more well off or marrying into money and they might see my ring as "modest" and in some ways that's a positive, that I am not going to overspend the budget (I am not going to make them pay for something they don't "need" anyway.) But in other ways they might not think I am capable enough to do the job at that level.

But for a bride on a tighter budget, wearing a ring that might outshine theirs might make them feel uncomfortable, or give the impression that I make too much on a job, where most of the time I might just break even. I've had comments from a few couples in the past, as well as parents when they're displeased with how much an order is going to cost, to the effect of "oh is that how we pay for your ring and your car and your purse?" So, I started just wearing a plain band to all consultations as a general rule to just eliminate the possibility of critical comments.
 
#20
ame said:
This is how I am. For my day job, I work in a not-so-great area of the city, and deal with people regularly at my office who are not in the greatest financial shape, some of whom have histories that would lend to an unfavorable outcome if I wore something to get that much attention. Add to that, I often have to dig around in old files, and crawl around in an IT closet. None of which is conducive to bling!

But when I am doing my sidework for my own business, there's also the question of "do I outshine my potential clients?" I have to consider that some brides are more well off or marrying into money and they might see my ring as "modest" and in some ways that's a positive, that I am not going to overspend the budget (I am not going to make them pay for something they don't "need" anyway.) But in other ways they might not think I am capable enough to do the job at that level.

But for a bride on a tighter budget, wearing a ring that might outshine theirs might make them feel uncomfortable, or give the impression that I make too much on a job, where most of the time I might just break even. I've had comments from a few couples in the past, as well as parents when they're displeased with how much an order is going to cost, to the effect of "oh is that how we pay for your ring and your car and your purse?" So, I started just wearing a plain band to all consultations as a general rule to just eliminate the possibility of critical comments.
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That's interesting how you make changes to work best for you professionally.

I am that girl that says "nice diamond". I wouldn't grab someone's hand but where's it friendly and (hopefully) appropriate, I've passed comment on someone's lovely jewellery.

I don't have my e-ring yet (waiting for it to come back from being resized), but I can't wait to wear it, and actually I'd be over the moon if someone thought to comment favourably on it. I'd take it as a huge compliment.
 
#21
Bagsbags99 said:
That's interesting how you make changes to work best for you professionally.

I am that girl that says "nice diamond". I wouldn't grab someone's hand but where's it friendly and (hopefully) appropriate, I've passed comment on someone's lovely jewellery.

I don't have my e-ring yet (waiting for it to come back from being resized), but I can't wait to wear it, and actually I'd be over the moon if someone thought to comment favourably on it. I'd take it as a huge compliment.
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I take it as a compliment depending on the tone in which it is said. A lot can be inferred from tone. But the comments I got at work were not of the "your diamond is amazing" they were of the "you are way overpaid" and "I am going to steal your diamond because I could pay my mortgage for a decade" variety.
 
#22
ame said:
I take it as a compliment depending on the tone in which it is said. A lot can be inferred from tone. But the comments I got at work were not of the "your diamond is amazing" they were of the "you are way overpaid" and "I am going to steal your diamond because I could pay my mortgage for a decade" variety.
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Yeah and that's a shame :(

Hopefully whenever I notice and say something I hope the wearer gets that's I'm really "wow!" For all the right reasons.

And I can see you're thinking of your clients etc when you chose which rings to put on and that's probably very wise (and nice of you).
 
#23
Bagsbags99 said:
Yeah and that's a shame :(

Hopefully whenever I notice and say something I hope the wearer gets that's I'm really "wow!" For all the right reasons.

And I can see you're thinking of your clients etc when you chose which rings to put on and that's probably very wise (and nice of you).
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I try to be really thoughtful about that, and my husband and I did a lot of discussing about things of that nature. In the beginning, he thought I was just overly sensitive to it, but now that he's heard all sorts of comments, he's very quick to point things out that even I miss. He comes to almost all of my consultations and deliveries either as muscle or just to be there in case of emergency. He's seen and heard it all now. :roflmfao:
 
#24
Understand. For my work it is really important to be low key. Cartier and VCA would not,go over well. Flashy rocks are out of the question. Professionally speaking, it's best to be aware of your audience.
 
#25
I have the same problem. It feels very weird when someone is grabbing your hand. I personally don't like it when people that I am not close to physically touches me. I guess it really depends on the individuals. When its people that I know personally it isn't a problem. It really depends on your comfort level. I know my friend doesn't wear her engagement ring when she goes to parties because people are constantly stopping her and looking at it. She says she can't enjoy talking to her families and friends without it being about her engagement ring.
 
#27
Haha ionly have ahalf a carat diamond solitaire ring and some people from work still askto see it...maybe if its areally huge stone I could imagine that it will be worst..
 
#28
ame said:
This is how I am. For my day job, I work in a not-so-great area of the city, and deal with people regularly at my office who are not in the greatest financial shape, some of whom have histories that would lend to an unfavorable outcome if I wore something to get that much attention. Add to that, I often have to dig around in old files, and crawl around in an IT closet. None of which is conducive to bling!

But when I am doing my sidework for my own business, there's also the question of "do I outshine my potential clients?" I have to consider that some brides are more well off or marrying into money and they might see my ring as "modest" and in some ways that's a positive, that I am not going to overspend the budget (I am not going to make them pay for something they don't "need" anyway.) But in other ways they might not think I am capable enough to do the job at that level.

But for a bride on a tighter budget, wearing a ring that might outshine theirs might make them feel uncomfortable, or give the impression that I make too much on a job, where most of the time I might just break even. I've had comments from a few couples in the past, as well as parents when they're displeased with how much an order is going to cost, to the effect of "oh is that how we pay for your ring and your car and your purse?" So, I started just wearing a plain band to all consultations as a general rule to just eliminate the possibility of critical comments.
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I totally understand what you mean. I work in corporate world and I find people could be judgmental at times especially women - no offense. I wore by Tiffany yellow diamond .97 pendant one day and this girl was all over it asking..wow that must be darn expensive in a very negative tone...I told her it was a citrine. lol
 
#29
Rami00 said:
I totally understand what you mean. I work in corporate world and I find people could be judgmental at times especially women - no offense. I wore by Tiffany yellow diamond .97 pendant one day and this girl was all over it asking..wow that must be darn expensive in a very negative tone...I told her it was a citrine. lol
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Isn't it lame that we have to do that?
 
#30
ame said:
This is how I am. For my day job, I work in a not-so-great area of the city, and deal with people regularly at my office who are not in the greatest financial shape, some of whom have histories that would lend to an unfavorable outcome if I wore something to get that much attention. Add to that, I often have to dig around in old files, and crawl around in an IT closet. None of which is conducive to bling!

But when I am doing my sidework for my own business, there's also the question of "do I outshine my potential clients?" I have to consider that some brides are more well off or marrying into money and they might see my ring as "modest" and in some ways that's a positive, that I am not going to overspend the budget (I am not going to make them pay for something they don't "need" anyway.) But in other ways they might not think I am capable enough to do the job at that level.

But for a bride on a tighter budget, wearing a ring that might outshine theirs might make them feel uncomfortable, or give the impression that I make too much on a job, where most of the time I might just break even. I've had comments from a few couples in the past, as well as parents when they're displeased with how much an order is going to cost, to the effect of "oh is that how we pay for your ring and your car and your purse?" So, I started just wearing a plain band to all consultations as a general rule to just eliminate the possibility of critical comments.
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ame said:
Isn't it lame that we have to do that?
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It is soooo lame. I have heard "why you even work?" "wow you are a princess, aren't you" "I bet those shorts are $500" ugh people are so cruel sometimes. So I learnt from those ugly comments...now I just make up stuff on the spot. LOL! It makes them happy ..so I guess it works both ways.


I am pathetic tho ... I have two Cartier loves on my hand and I have heard "hey are those Michel Kors bracelets" and I have agreed to saying "yup from Marshalls" LMAO.
 
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