Sam's Club has some really nice things! Sure, some are not GIA certified (I think they use IGI most times), but if you are looking for something that is pretty and reasonable, it is a great alternative. I looked for replacement e-rings for my mom there on my dad's behalf. They had some very pretty rings that were quite a nice size for 3-4k.
% of salary - what's a reasonable amount to spend on engagement ring?
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Sam's Club has some really nice things! Sure, some are not GIA certified (I think they use IGI most times), but if you are looking for something that is pretty and reasonable, it is a great alternative. I looked for replacement e-rings for my mom there on my dad's behalf. They had some very pretty rings that were quite a nice size for 3-4k.
i have heard people say 3 months salary before, but it was only hearsay..i was unaware of De Beers' commercial..hehe..not surprising they would do that.
a girlfriend of mine told me (before i was engaged) that the ring should cost at least or more than the car the bf drives..lol...her reasoning was that he should invest as much if not more into a "symbol" of his love to you...no one has to agree but that was her take..one thing worth noting though..a diamond APPRECIATES in price so it is actually a better investment (money wise) than purses (gasp!) or cars..haha..
most of my husband's friends bought their wives about 2 carats engagement ring..some were princess cuts,some were rounds. i believe rounds is the most costly (all other things being equal)
i think "reasonable" is really really subjective..it depends on your SO's age, job, etc..also,buying an e ring is probably not as important as investing in a home together, and other future plans..as long as your BF buys you something YOU love, it doesnt really matter what anyone else thinks..hehe..i am sure he will blow you away!!
my husband bought me a 3+ carat solitaire engagement ring from tiffanys but he did a lot of research before hand, and it was a purchase that he was able to do comfortably so i feel good about it as well..hehee...honestly, i would not want my husband to be spending 3 months salary on my ring...i would feel terrible! any luxury purchase should be done only when it is comfortable to do so...
just my two cents!
a girlfriend of mine told me (before i was engaged) that the ring should cost at least or more than the car the bf drives..lol...her reasoning was that he should invest as much if not more into a "symbol" of his love to you...no one has to agree but that was her take..one thing worth noting though..a diamond APPRECIATES in price so it is actually a better investment (money wise) than purses (gasp!) or cars..haha..
most of my husband's friends bought their wives about 2 carats engagement ring..some were princess cuts,some were rounds. i believe rounds is the most costly (all other things being equal)
i think "reasonable" is really really subjective..it depends on your SO's age, job, etc..also,buying an e ring is probably not as important as investing in a home together, and other future plans..as long as your BF buys you something YOU love, it doesnt really matter what anyone else thinks..hehe..i am sure he will blow you away!!
my husband bought me a 3+ carat solitaire engagement ring from tiffanys but he did a lot of research before hand, and it was a purchase that he was able to do comfortably so i feel good about it as well..hehee...honestly, i would not want my husband to be spending 3 months salary on my ring...i would feel terrible! any luxury purchase should be done only when it is comfortable to do so...
just my two cents!
Guess its easy to figure out if she really wants you or the ring. There are some serious gold diggers out & about that don't even try to hide it.
I was older when I found the one I'd marry. I lived & learned, the romantic fantasies about the ring/stone/jewlery/whatever were gone. I'd been engaged 2 times before. (One time in the late 70's was when the rule of thumb for engagement rings was 1 month salary. DeBeers just keeps raising the bar.)
I was older when I found the one I'd marry. I lived & learned, the romantic fantasies about the ring/stone/jewlery/whatever were gone. I'd been engaged 2 times before. (One time in the late 70's was when the rule of thumb for engagement rings was 1 month salary. DeBeers just keeps raising the bar.)
IntlSet: yup..2 carats seem to be the "average' (i use this term very loosely) for women our age group (I am 24) whose husbands work in Wall Street (seems like all of my gfs husbands all work for the top 3 finance companies in NYC..everyone knows everyone else! kinda scary if you think about it..haha)
do you have a dream design? if you dont think your BF shares your taste, maybe you can mention it casually in a conversation or if you see a picture in a magazine,point to it..haha..you will be surprised how astute men can be when they need to be..haha..this way, when he does his research, he will say "hey, this design looks familiar..i think she likes this!" lol...
my husband bought my e ring all on his own..haha,..i was really surprised he read my mind and picked my dream design..so i guess its a sign we are married? lol...
do you have a dream design? if you dont think your BF shares your taste, maybe you can mention it casually in a conversation or if you see a picture in a magazine,point to it..haha..you will be surprised how astute men can be when they need to be..haha..this way, when he does his research, he will say "hey, this design looks familiar..i think she likes this!" lol...
my husband bought my e ring all on his own..haha,..i was really surprised he read my mind and picked my dream design..so i guess its a sign we are married? lol...
^^^
My SO is also in finance. He works for a prop trading firm here in Chicago.
Trust me, he will not take the time to research anything or to figure out what's "me." He is just not that kind of guy, although he is fantastic in many, many ways. He will buy the first ring that his eye falls upon that is remotely appealing to him and fits into his budget. He'll probably buy it in the first store he walks into.
To get a ring that I would even remotely want to wear (because after all, if an engagement is about the meaning, isn't the ring just an accessory? and what's the point of wearing an ugly accessory? I can just buy a nice ring and wear it myself in that case!), I would just pick it out myself and buy it with his credit card. It's deeply unromantic. But that's just really how he is -- he hates wasting time on anything that's not related to something of deep interest to him. Unfortunately, his interest does not include diamonds.
So seriously, a ring is all on me! Which is why I very much appreciate the opinions and loose guidelines you ladies have presented here.
My SO is also in finance. He works for a prop trading firm here in Chicago.
Trust me, he will not take the time to research anything or to figure out what's "me." He is just not that kind of guy, although he is fantastic in many, many ways. He will buy the first ring that his eye falls upon that is remotely appealing to him and fits into his budget. He'll probably buy it in the first store he walks into.
To get a ring that I would even remotely want to wear (because after all, if an engagement is about the meaning, isn't the ring just an accessory? and what's the point of wearing an ugly accessory? I can just buy a nice ring and wear it myself in that case!), I would just pick it out myself and buy it with his credit card. It's deeply unromantic. But that's just really how he is -- he hates wasting time on anything that's not related to something of deep interest to him. Unfortunately, his interest does not include diamonds.
So seriously, a ring is all on me! Which is why I very much appreciate the opinions and loose guidelines you ladies have presented here.
Annie, I am known to choose my own gifts as well. . . not all men are "perfect" in EVERY way, you and I have learned we have to take the not so romantic side of them w/ the good they offer as well
GOSH, I KNOW you are, Amanda!!! Only, I cannot -- cannot, wish I could -- do it with the finesse you do it with... I daresay Mr. Swanky thinks its all his brilliant idea...
Ooo icic..haha..i understand..im am sure your bf is a wonderful man who loves u very very much, and working in finance is very stressful so its understandable...i see where hes coming from..haha....
do u have a diamond district in Chicago? maybe you can go w/ a good friend (dont go alone) and take a look..see what the designs, options, prices are..get a good idea..try some on to see your RING SIZE and also what shapes you like and looks good on your hand...figure out the setting you prefer..its important to do research first b/c some places will totally try to rip you off if you are not an"educated consumer." also, does any of your friend have diamond brokers? or maybe jewelers they trust? often, these pp can get u a good % discount..at places like Tiffanys and Harry Winstons, diamonds are marked up sooo much, that unless you are crazy about their designs, its probably not worth it..you can get a really quality diamond elsewhere too..just have to look harder..
also, have u tried blue nile online? they have a good tutorial on diamonds, 4cs, etc...its a good read..that way if and when you are negotiating prices, you have a reference and know the market price..
maybe if you do all the research first (finding out ring size, or maybe even ur dream ring) you can just tell your BF outright when the "time" comes..lol..that way, its a win win situation! you get the perfect ring, and he buys the perfect ring w/o any headache or time wasted! haha
i think my husband and i are a bit odd compared to most couples, he always buys gifts for me on his own and i completely trusts his taste..lol..he always picks things i love..but whenever it comes time for me to buy him things..omg, its the HARDEST! hes an impeccable dresser...and im not so educated or informed on mens fashion (im so used to getting things for my dad from Brooks Brothers, but my husband HATES typical American men clothes!) so buying things for hubby has always been quite hard for me..haha..its gotten so bad that i just call his tailor here on Madison and ask him to make the latest order my hubby placed and i just pay for it ....Not romantic on my part..i know..but what can i do? haha
Good Luck Intlset! shopping for e rings can be complicated, i hope to help if i can!!
LOL! It took years of training but as well worth it
DH was probably like your BF for a long time. . . he was all about making the $ and did not like to part w/ it. As he grew older and w/ me oh so gentle direction
he's "getting" that it's not all about the $ anymore.
Annie, I am known to choose my own gifts as well. . . not all men are "perfect" in EVERY way, you and I have learned we have to take the not so romantic side of them w/ the good they offer as well
So true! I have been picking out my own gifts from parents and boyfriend for years. With BF, we have "reconaissance missions" to T&Co. where I try on whatever catches our eye and tell him what I do/don't like about it. That way, he knows what to get me. He likes it that way- he thinks I am hard to buy for and gets flustered otherwise.
As for e-rings, I think it's all about what you are comfortable spending. I have already found the one I want and it is way less than "two month's salary" but it fits my taste and lifestyle perfectly. It should be about the two of you- what you like, and what he feels comfortable spending- maybe you'll both have to compromise a little. I think the best way to do it is to find the ring you love, and then see how much it costs, if you can get it elsewhere for less, smaller stone, whatever, until you are both happy with what you've found. Good luck!
Annie, DH and I went to the store together and picked out my stone and setting. It took the pressure off him -- no worrying about picking out something that I didn't like. Maybe this would work in your case?
I also second the idea of going to a diamond district. We have a few wholesale buildings in SF, which is where I got my ring. If I had gotten practically the same ring at Tiffany, it would have cost three times the price we paid for my ring. DH actually entertained this idea but I told him I didn't want us to be in debt for my engagement ring. He was relieved!
I also second the idea of going to a diamond district. We have a few wholesale buildings in SF, which is where I got my ring. If I had gotten practically the same ring at Tiffany, it would have cost three times the price we paid for my ring. DH actually entertained this idea but I told him I didn't want us to be in debt for my engagement ring. He was relieved!
swanky, it's nice to know that men can change over time with some "training." i have a hard enough time getting the bf (who makes plenty of $) to buy HIMSELF quality things.
intlset, i think my bf is a lot like yours. i think you should shop with him when the time comes so you can come to an agreement on what is appropriate for you as a couple without sacrificing the style and quality you want. and there's nothing wrong with some good research before that day comes.
intlset, i think my bf is a lot like yours. i think you should shop with him when the time comes so you can come to an agreement on what is appropriate for you as a couple without sacrificing the style and quality you want. and there's nothing wrong with some good research before that day comes.
Girls, when ppl say "I received a 2 carat ring"---do they mean TOTAL carats? As in setting or whatever side stones are used...not like a solitaire stone???
I have a 3.75 ring finger and wow when I tried on 2 carats (may be I am being to conservative) but it looks too big! But I would not mind it of course....hehehe
I have a 3.75 ring finger and wow when I tried on 2 carats (may be I am being to conservative) but it looks too big! But I would not mind it of course....hehehe
getting DH to indulge himself is a whole 'nother story! I cannot get him to
He thinks when I buy him $60 dress shirts from NM Last Call I'm out of control. But as we've grown older I've proved to him that I would rather a nice piece of jewelry every year or so rather than lots of little silly things the whole year through. This little "hall pass" seems to alleviate a lot of nonsenseical anxiety for him.
Mine is a 3.67 carat solitaire and I wear a 3.75 as well
The too big part? You get over it!