Maintaining an H relationship

[papertiger]

Please focus on the title of this thread rather than each other, TY

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[880]

My SA doesn’t try to entice me at all. That’s the weird part. He’s sent me a few ideas on items but they were not me at all and I was very nice about guiding him away from those items and towards other items I’d be interested in. I think it may help for me to open that door so to speak and give him the green light in making more suggestions 😄

IMO only, until you get to know your SA quite well, I would personally not text a lot. Bc they get a lot of texts and aren’t given time to answer other than random minutes on the floor. They’re also told to prioritize in store clients, even walk ins. I would say, be patient and your SA will eventually get to know your taste. There is no rush, and this isn’t a sprint, but rather a start to a hopefully long relationship. Just my experience

 

[Love Of My Life]

My SA doesn’t try to entice me at all. That’s the weird part. He’s sent me a few ideas on items but they were not me at all and I was very nice about guiding him away from those items and towards other items I’d be interested in. I think it may help for me to open that door so to speak and give him the green light in making more suggestions 😄

With the holidays coming up, if there is an item or two that you may have your eye on, you
could reach out to your SA & let them know you have an interest.
Don't know if you like RTW, homewares, jewelry etc but they are usually responsive if you can
be specific, JMO
My SA for example who has been at Maison Madison for a number of years will reach out to
me with something very specific (RTW) that he knows I would have interest in & he usually hits the nail
on the head.
It takes time & patience to develop a relationship with an SA.. These SA's likely receive many texts,
handle clients new & old& walk-ins, so likely many of them don't at times have a chance to catch their
breath, if you want something, just ask for it, if your SA is not as responsive as you would like,
do indeed open that door & keep in mind that with the holidays coming up, SA's will be busy

 

[acrowcounted]

My SA doesn’t try to entice me at all. That’s the weird part. He’s sent me a few ideas on items but they were not me at all and I was very nice about guiding him away from those items and towards other items I’d be interested in. I think it may help for me to open that door so to speak and give him the green light in making more suggestions 😄

I think this really just points to the two different kinds of H shoppers. I’m the kind of shopper than plans out what I want to buy and only goes into the store with a direct purpose to purchase X exact items. Sure, I’ll look around while I’m there and try on suggestions made from the SA at the time and usually grab a thing or two unplanned, but my SAs do not text me with “hey, wanna buy this item that you’ve never mentioned an interest in before??” ever because they know I would be completely turned off by that kind of “pushiness” as I see it. The other type of shopper is the kind that just goes in to shop without anything in mind and are happy to check out and pick from what’s new. I would guess our dear @880 and @Bdbunny fall more into this camp so they would likely also be more likely to enjoy an out of the blue text suggestion and consider that great client service. As your SA gets to know you better, they are likely to determine which kind of client you are (but most tend to start by assuming that you don’t want the random “buy this?” text). But also if they think you are open to cold suggestions and you turn them down multiple times in a row, they will probably stop trying.

 

[Bdbunny]

I think this really just points to the two different kinds of H shoppers. I’m the kind of shopper than plans out what I want to buy and only goes into the store with a direct purpose to purchase X exact items. Sure, I’ll look around while I’m there and try on suggestions made from the SA at the time and usually grab a thing or two unplanned, but my SAs do not text me with “hey, wanna buy this item that you’ve never mentioned an interest in before??” ever because they know I would be completely turned off by that kind of “pushiness” as I see it. The other type of shopper is the kind that just goes in to shop without anything in mind and are happy to check out and pick from what’s new. I would guess our dear @880 and @Bdbunny fall more into this camp so they would likely also be more likely to enjoy an out of the blue text suggestion and consider that great client service. As your SA gets to know you better, they are likely to determine which kind of client you are (but most tend to start by assuming that you don’t want the random “buy this?” text). But also if they think you are open to cold suggestions and you turn them down multiple times in a row, they will probably stop trying.

Spot on @acrowcounted !!

ETA: I am definitely more of a browser. I rarely have something specific in mind, maybe a broad category like RTW, or I'm in the mood for jewelry today. By now, my SAs know what I like and also what will look good on me and what will not work with my body type, so they usually have some pieces pulled, but we also walk around and see if anything else catches my eye. And now that I've been shopping with my SA awhile, it's also a lot of stuff that's arriving from the previous runway show etc, or other things I ordered months ago. So I'm also trying on things I pre-ordered, whether it's RTW, shoes, FJ etc. And of course the more you shop with your SA, the better they get to know you and what you have in your closet. Like yesterday my SA suggested a certain top because it would coordinate with one of my bags. We also decided a certain length of skirt is NOT flattering on me and we will never do that again.

 

[hbr]

I think this really just points to the two different kinds of H shoppers. I’m the kind of shopper than plans out what I want to buy and only goes into the store with a direct purpose to purchase X exact items. Sure, I’ll look around while I’m there and try on suggestions made from the SA at the time and usually grab a thing or two unplanned, but my SAs do not text me with “hey, wanna buy this item that you’ve never mentioned an interest in before??” ever because they know I would be completely turned off by that kind of “pushiness” as I see it. The other type of shopper is the kind that just goes in to shop without anything in mind and are happy to check out and pick from what’s new. I would guess our dear @880 and @Bdbunny fall more into this camp so they would likely also be more likely to enjoy an out of the blue text suggestion and consider that great client service. As your SA gets to know you better, they are likely to determine which kind of client you are (but most tend to start by assuming that you don’t want the random “buy this?” text). But also if they think you are open to cold suggestions and you turn them down multiple times in a row, they will probably stop trying.

This is very helpful and true. Thank you! I think if my store was local I would be more of the purposeful shopper with items I want etc. But, bc I’m in another state it creates a little bit more of a complicated situation. I wouldn’t mind a suggestion from him here or there but also when he has done that I haven’t been keen on the items he’s recommended and maybe he’s noticed - thus leading to less texts with random suggestions.

 

[DoggieBags]

IMO only, until you get to know your SA quite well, I would personally not text a lot. Bc they get a lot of texts and aren’t given time to answer other than random minutes on the floor. They’re also told to prioritize in store clients, even walk ins. I would say, be patient and your SA will eventually get to know your taste. There is no rush, and this isn’t a sprint, but rather a start to a hopefully long relationship. Just my experience

I’ve been with the same SA for a number of years and I sometimes go months without my either texting her or her texting me. We don’t chat at all via text but do chat in person. I only text if there is something I am interested in and she usually only texts if she has something she thinks I might be interested in. I’d say she’s been right on average 8 out of 10 times when she’s texted me about something I did not ask for but she very rarely does this. She’ll also text to ask if I want to go to a specific event but that also is a rare text. She’s busy, I’m busy so we respect each others’ time. If I go in to see her, it’s by appointment and she has specific things set aside for me. If I have time, I’ll go in a bit early to browse to see if there is anything in store that I might also want to try. But I’m usually in and out in an hour or less. I don’t really enjoy shopping so am not the type to make a day of shopping, going in and out of multiple stores.

 

[Bdbunny]

This is very helpful and true. Thank you! I think if my store was local I would be more of the purposeful shopper with items I want etc. But, bc I’m in another state it creates a little bit more of a complicated situation. I wouldn’t mind a suggestion from him here or there but also when he has done that I haven’t been keen on the items he’s recommended and maybe he’s noticed - thus leading to less texts with random suggestions.

I am pretty much a remote shopper. Even NYC is not THAT easy to get to since I don't live full time in the city, so my appointments are always planned and we have to put it in our family schedule. I can't just stop in randomly on a weekday because I finished my work day early, for example. And of course Paris is planned months in advance. I don't think this has hampered my relationships with my SAs at all. It sounds like you and your SA are still getting to know each other's style and preferences.

 

[hbr]

I am pretty much a remote shopper. Even NYC is not THAT easy to get to since I don't live full time in the city, so my appointments are always planned and we have to put it in our family schedule. I can't just stop in randomly on a weekday because I finished my work day early, for example. And of course Paris is planned months in advance. I don't think this has hampered my relationships with my SAs at all. It sounds like you and your SA are still getting to know each other's style and preferences.

Thank you for sharing. I’m definitely a remote shopper as well since I’m in another state. Lately I haven’t shopped much and thus starting thinking….

 

[880]

I think it's ok not to be talking to your SA all the time. I would reach out when there's something you want to purchase or when you know you are visiting again to set up an appointment. Just let things happen organically.

Agree with @Bdbunny Also don’t overthink. Shopping is meant to be fun. No need to orchestrate or green light anything to encourage an SA or worry about saying no. A no helps an SA establish your taste, but it also helps to be open to the possibility that something you haven’t considered will be perfect lol.

It’s all part of the back and forth of getting to know each other. No SA wants to push you into something that you will end up regretting and returning. Bc that’s just a waste of time and energy for everyone. My SA would never suggest something that was totally outside my preference wheelhouse (like bag charms or pastels or bright saturated color or cute things on the first floor). Bc she knows my price range ; my style; what I own; what would complement my current wardrobe. Trust your SA’s powers of observation.

But. At the same time, an SA isn’t a diner waitress taking short orders, so it’s best if they can be active participants in your foray into the brand. The last thing I want is to have to slog through look books or H.com. My SA can filter all that for me. My SA also knows that I will miss most of the fall events and dislike shopping around the holidays. She doesn’t worry about that. She knows I will be around at other times.

Of course, this is simply my own relationship. Everyone is different and there are many ways to a productive relationship. Which, incidentally, I do not measure by the number of bag offers. JMO and ymmv

ETA: an SA also understands if you don’t happen to love a particular season or collection. They don’t always either A polite way to decline, if you need one, is simply to say that you prefer what she picked for you last season lol.

 

[Veritybelle]

Agree with @Bdbunny Also don’t overthink. Shopping is meant to be fun. No need to orchestrate or green light anything to encourage an SA or worry about saying no. A no helps an SA establish your taste, but it also helps to be open to the possibility that something you haven’t considered will be perfect lol.

It’s all part of the back and forth of getting to know each other. No SA wants to push you into something that you will end up regretting and returning. Bc that’s just a waste of time and energy for everyone. My SA would never suggest something that was totally outside my preference wheelhouse (like bag charms or pastels or bright saturated color or cute things on the first floor). Bc she knows my price range ; my style; what I own; what would complement my current wardrobe. Trust your SA’s powers of observation.

But. At the same time, an SA isn’t a diner waitress taking short orders, so it’s best if they can be active participants in your foray into the brand. The last thing I want is to have to slog through look books or H.com. My SA can filter all that for me. My SA also knows that I will miss most of the fall events and dislike shopping around the holidays. She doesn’t worry about that. She knows I will be around at other times.

Of course, this is simply my own relationship. Everyone is different and there are many ways to a productive relationship. Which, incidentally, I do not measure by the number of bag offers. JMO and ymmv

ETA: an SA also understands if you don’t happen to love a particular season or collection. They don’t always either A polite way to decline, if you need one, is simply to say that you prefer what she picked for you last season lol.

Incredibly wise words as always from our dear @880, @acrowcounted and @Bdbunny @hbr, I can imagine it feels a bit of a challenge to build a relationship when you know realistically you won’t be coming into the boutique as often as others who live closer. It may take a bit longer for your SA to build familiarity with your tastes and preferences but over time, I think it will happen if you communicate consistently. Don’t be put off by your SA showing you things you don’t want/like. I’ve been working with my current SA for only about a year or so, and in that time she’s definitely sounded me out with a few “creative” suggestions lol to develop an understanding of my preferences (and I’ve been clear when something doesn’t speak to me), which has helped her to look after me. Over time those exploratory offers have given way to offers that definitely appeal most of the time. She knows not to offer me a Constance or a MK, and that I will always be tempted by a heritage leather or a rare colour. IME our SAs soon work out that we are serious about the house and they respond accordingly.

Re texting, even though we get along really well and have a relaxed relationship, I only text if: (1) I am coming into the store and want to line her up or make sure she’s working that day; (2) I have found something online and I want to know if she has it or can get it, or whether I should just buy it from H.com; (3) if I promised to send her something last time I was in, which is the closest we get to chatting (eg she’s in Paris now so I sent her a list of some casual restaurants and bars I have enjoyed visiting). She only texts in response to any of the above categories, or to provide information on a product I might have inquired about, or (best of all, obviously) if she “has a surprise” for me

 

[hbr]

Incredibly wise words as always from our dear @880, @acrowcounted and @Bdbunny @hbr, I can imagine it feels a bit of a challenge to build a relationship when you know realistically you won’t be coming into the boutique as often as others who live closer. It may take a bit longer for your SA to build familiarity with your tastes and preferences but over time, I think it will happen if you communicate consistently. Don’t be put off by your SA showing you things you don’t want/like. I’ve been working with my current SA for only about a year or so, and in that time she’s definitely sounded me out with a few “creative” suggestions lol to develop an understanding of my preferences (and I’ve been clear when something doesn’t speak to me), which has helped her to look after me. Over time those exploratory offers have given way to offers that definitely appeal most of the time. She knows not to offer me a Constance or a MK, and that I will always be tempted by a heritage leather or a rare colour. IME our SAs soon work out that we are serious about the house and they respond accordingly.

Re texting, even though we get along really well and have a relaxed relationship, I only text if: (1) I am coming into the store and want to line her up or make sure she’s working that day; (2) I have found something online and I want to know if she has it or can get it, or whether I should just buy it from H.com; (3) if I promised to send her something last time I was in, which is the closest we get to chatting (eg she’s in Paris now so I sent her a list of some casual restaurants and bars I have enjoyed visiting). She only texts in response to any of the above categories, or to provide information on a product I might have inquired about, or (best of all, obviously) if she “has a surprise” for me

Thank you dear @Veritybelle - this is very helpful and encouraging ❤️

 

[A1aGypsy]

Thank you for sharing. I’m definitely a remote shopper as well since I’m in another state. Lately I haven’t shopped much and thus starting thinking….

I think, unfortunately, influencers have ruined expectations*. Hermes is a retail company. Any “relationships” that exist are built around selling with the very rare one developing into a true friendship after time. Buddy type texts outside of those rare situations aren’t going to be productive.

Likewise, a selling relationship where the SA is texting curated items isn’t going to instantaneously happen. Especially in this time of high in store demand for Hermes products. The SA has to understand that a client is the type where that relationship will pay off (ie. willing to buy in that way, willing to buy enough in that way and also to buy across the offerings). This kind of relationship is most organically developed in person - to learn the needs, wants and likes of the client.

I hate to say it but a long distance shopping client is now at a real disadvantage. The SAs are naturally going to focus on the in store clients who can select, purchase and go. They don’t have the same need to cultivate clientele as they did when remote shopping had a much bigger presence in the Hermes world.

* eta: with false narratives

 

[QuelleFromage]

I think, unfortunately, influencers have ruined expectations. Hermes is a retail company. Any “relationships” that exist are built around selling with the very rare one developing into a true friendship after time. Buddy type texts outside of those rare situations aren’t going to be productive.

Likewise, a selling relationship where the SA is texting curated items isn’t going to instantaneously happen. Especially in this time of high in store demand for Hermes products. The SA has to understand that a client is the type where that relationship will pay off (ie. willing to buy in that way, willing to buy enough in that way and also to buy across the offerings). This kind of relationship is most organically developed in person - to learn the needs, wants and likes of the client.

I hate to say it but a long distance shopping client is now at a real disadvantage. The SAs are naturally going to focus on the in store clients who can select, purchase and go. They don’t have the same need to cultivate clientele as they did when remote shopping had a much bigger presence in the Hermes world.

I agree with this, and would add that there are a lot of influencers who exaggerate their SA relationships and make it sound like their SA spends a huge amount of time anticipating their needs (the whole "H fairy" thing). I know this from living in both NYC and Paris and seeing people come in whom I later see on Insta, YT, TT, etc.
This creates bad feelings for normal humans who aren't trying to make up a story for followers.

It takes a long time to develop the kind of relationship where an SA will text you things you *might* like - think how much time that takes! Then multiply it by hundreds of clients....

 

[parisistherapy]

Curious how long is too long to take a break with your H relationship, esp. when close (?) to your next QB? 3-6 months?

 

[hbr]

I think, unfortunately, influencers have ruined expectations. Hermes is a retail company. Any “relationships” that exist are built around selling with the very rare one developing into a true friendship after time. Buddy type texts outside of those rare situations aren’t going to be productive.

Likewise, a selling relationship where the SA is texting curated items isn’t going to instantaneously happen. Especially in this time of high in store demand for Hermes products. The SA has to understand that a client is the type where that relationship will pay off (ie. willing to buy in that way, willing to buy enough in that way and also to buy across the offerings). This kind of relationship is most organically developed in person - to learn the needs, wants and likes of the client.

I hate to say it but a long distance shopping client is now at a real disadvantage. The SAs are naturally going to focus on the in store clients who can select, purchase and go. They don’t have the same need to cultivate clientele as they did when remote shopping had a much bigger presence in the Hermes world.

I appreciate your input and perspective. However, I have to disagree with your point about long distance clients being at a disadvantage. I think this is very much a case by case situation and not an overall truth. If the client is loyal and knows what they like and want, creating a relationship isn’t difficult. I see myself in this catagory. I think the tough part is the more nuanced aspect of shopping in person which involves having leisurely conversations with the SA which leads to SA learning more about the clients likes etc which help him/her make suggestions for future purchases. This is the part that’s tricky with long distance clients. So, the way I see it, it comes down to patience and communication with the new SA in learning my taste over time.

My experience with my new SA who’s out of state has been nothing but positive and very enjoyable thus far. I think he understands and knows that I’m a loyal client and I’m looking to continue to build on the relationship with his store so there is incentive for him to build on this relationship with me. I have no fantasies about creating a true friendship with him, but rather know that there is nuance in long distance relationships of this kind.