Maintaining an H relationship

[papertiger]

Please focus on the title of this thread rather than each other, TY

If you find it very hard to ignore certain people, please feel free in adding them to your 'Ignore' list.

For advice on how to obtain a B/K/C please go to the reading room in the Reading Room The Newbie's HOW DO I GET A BIRKIN (or other bag) Reading Room

For advice on how to shop at your local store please do a search in Hermes Shopping sub-forum and look for your store/region/country.

 

[880]

With all due respect, it is not that serious. It is just shopping and it is just a couple of bags. If you don’t like the other people’s approach to shopping, that is fine. You have done great by anyone’s standards, especially in such a short time. If my SA, who is the best SA in the world, had obtained the bags you have gotten in the time you had gotten them, I would be beyond grateful. When I feel like my OCD for Hermes is on overdrive, I just tell my psychiatrist hubby to up my meds, buy an exotic and I am all good for a couple of months. As my mentor @880 says, our SAs really are not trying to engage in fraudulent relationships with their clients. If anyone believes that, what an unsatisfactory, paranoid and oppositional experience Hermes shopping will be for that shopper. Why bother?

Ha, @haute okole, the mentoring is reciprocal; it is so great to see how much fun you and your SA have together

Agree with @Veritybelle that treating shopping as a series of unconnected transactions may result in one’s home SA doing the same. I don’t see how anyone could interpret her post as making accusations of cheating or unethical behavior. To think so might be projecting much. This is only shopping after all.

Having said that, if I felt this negatively about my home SA, I would stop shopping with her as per @acrowcounted and others up thread. I don’t shop with anyone whom I don’t trust, and that doesn’t change bc of any bag. It cannot be pleasant for her either. And, if one asks for opinions on an open thread about every minute interaction, simply be prepared for opinions antithetical to your own. My SA has never asked for exclusivity from me and has always been delighted by my vintage and FSH treasures.

As @Helventara says, we are the clients and responsible for our own behavior. And, if I’m on vacation, i like to shop. But, it’s not just out of courtesy nor out of bag offers that I limit US expenditures to my local store. My local SA knows best my taste and what I already have. Listening to her saves me from buyers remorse and returns and makes shopping more efficient.

All of us share what our own experiences are, and we can certainly do that without accusing others of statements that they did not make. It’s too bad that when we do share our own experiences that we are accused of gatekeeping, when it is the brand that gatekeeps. But, there is always the ignore button.

ETA: it’s not up to the SA whether she can offer a bag or not. She has to make a case to the SM. Those who advise loyalty; spend etc, base all that on cumulative success stories during record high post covid competition for bags in the US. Those who think their SAs read every word here must think their SAs have nothing better to do.

In my opinion, those of us who are OG only started to tally up spend bc so many newcomers kept asking for details including moon phase at time of purchase. Prior to that, if we tallied up anything it was for internal personal accounting.

 

[Capitaliste]

LOL, I'm not a US client and have not made any accusations of cheating or unethical behaviour.

I don’t see how anyone could interpret her post as making accusations of cheating or unethical behavior.

Just to clarify, I was responding to some of earlier posts, not specifically targeting at @Veritybelle's post. Sorry!

ETA: Only time will tell how it goes. I hope each of you enjoys shopping at Hermes.

 

[nikotama]

.

 

[880]

First, I am asking a question and gathering information to make an informed decision here. Whatever the results I will have is 100% my responsibility. Plus, my emotion (i.e., whether satisfied or not) is not the matter of focus here. Also, remember "YMMV." What typical others do/spend on/interact with the H has nothing to do with me because I am on my own in this journey. (If someone has to spend 3x for each QB, it is his/her/their story, not mine.)

Second, my SA in the home store does know that I started shopping at Hermes because of its iconic bags introduced by my family members. So, I am not surprised at all. After reading your post, if I decide to switch an SA/store and pick up the SO in my current home store later, I decide not to be awkward since I am paying for it and did/will not do anything unethical/illegal. [ETA: That awkward moment will last 30 minutes at most.]

Relatedly, someone also posted above that resale may be a better option if someone is only looking for bags. It could be yes or no. Anyone can be important clients whether they only want QBs or multiple other items. Clearly, we all have different definitions of a strong SA relationship, etc. Since we don't have an agreed upon definition anyway, so I won't discuss this further.

Third, if buying a non-QB from another SA is considered cheating and unethical, please think this through again that this is the culture created by H and clients like you in the US. I have already told my SA that I could get that exact same non-QB from the resellers and that she doesn't need to worry about it. I was just lucky enough to get that non-QB from another boutique and that's all. (I gave my $ to the H directly and not the resellers. They should actually thank me.)

Fourth, I think we have a different definition of loyalty. I just want to reiterate one of my favorite quotes from this Forum below:


Since I gathered enough information and now can make the decision, we can stop here. Thank you.

FYI, if you quote another members post and respond with enumerated points, most readers will assume you are referring to that post.

 

[880]

Duplicate post

 

[HermesXoXo]

ETA: Only time will tell how it goes. I hope each of you enjoys shopping at Hermes.

I agree that only TIME will tell... so no need for the desperation and urgency in asking for feedbacks and guidance after each and every encounter and transaction. I too am a client of Madison, with blue box purchases, and can comfortably say that your (ex)SA won't be thrilled with your Kelly purchase from across the bridge.

 

[texas87]

Ha, @haute okole, the mentoring is reciprocal; it is so great to see how much fun you and your SA have together

Agree with @Veritybelle that treating shopping as a series of unconnected transactions may result in one’s home SA doing the same. I don’t see how anyone could interpret her post as making accusations of cheating or unethical behavior. To think so might be projecting much. This is only shopping after all.

Having said that, if I felt this negatively about my home SA, I would stop shopping with her as per @acrowcounted and others up thread. I don’t shop with anyone whom I don’t trust, and that doesn’t change bc of any bag. It cannot be pleasant for her either. And, if one asks for opinions on an open thread about every minute interaction, simply be prepared for opinions antithetical to your own. My SA has never asked for exclusivity from me and has always been delighted by my vintage and FSH treasures.

As @Helventara says, we are the clients and responsible for our own behavior. And, if I’m on vacation, i like to shop. But, it’s not just out of courtesy nor out of bag offers that I limit US expenditures to my local store. My local SA knows best my taste and what I already have. Listening to her saves me from buyers remorse and returns and makes shopping more efficient.

All of us share what our own experiences are, and we can certainly do that without accusing others of statements that they did not make. It’s too bad that when we do share our own experiences that we are accused of gatekeeping, when it is the brand that gatekeeps. But, there is always the ignore button.

ETA: it’s not up to the SA whether she can offer a bag or not. She has to make a case to the SM. Those who advise loyalty; spend etc, base all that on cumulative success stories during record high post covid competition for bags in the US. Those who think their SAs read every word here must think their SAs have nothing better to do.

In my opinion, those of us who are OG only started to tally up spend bc so many newcomers kept asking for details including moon phase at time of purchase. Prior to that, if we tallied up anything it was for internal personal accounting.

I actually LOLed at moon phase You're so right. People so desperately want there to be a set formula and there simply isnt one.

 

[xceleritas]

I actually LOLed at moon phase You're so right. People so desperately want there to be a set formula and there simply isnt one.

I don't know about y'all but this is where my mind went when I read moon phase:

https://www.hermes.com/us/en/product/arceau-petite-lune-watch-large-model-38mm-W403043WW00/

https://www.hermes.com/us/en/product/arceau-grande-lune-watch-43mm-W038481WW00/

And if I actually got one - that'd be a great way to maintain my relationship with my SA

 

[CloudyDayz198]

With all due respect, it is not that serious. It is just shopping and it is just a couple of bags. If you don’t like the other people’s approach to shopping, that is fine. You have done great by anyone’s standards, especially in such a short time. If my SA, who is the best SA in the world, had obtained the bags you have gotten in the time you had gotten them, I would be beyond grateful. When I feel like my OCD for Hermes is on overdrive, I just tell my psychiatrist hubby to up my meds, buy an exotic and I am all good for a couple of months. As my mentor @880 says, our SAs really are not trying to engage in fraudulent relationships with their clients. If anyone believes that, what an unsatisfactory, paranoid and oppositional experience Hermes shopping will be for that shopper. Why bother?

This legit made me LOL . Truer words have never been spoken!

 

[xceleritas]

This is causing me to reflect a bit more about what this whole H-relationship is about, to me at least. (I'm also based in the States, so just limited to what I've experienced.)
The more time I've stayed as a client with H, the more I'm seeing that my SA is also investing her time in me as a potential long-term client. I've learned a ton about the house from her, she works hard to get the stuff I ask for, and while it IS a business relationship - there's a positive human aspect to it all (she's knows I can't shop like a VIP, we like recommending bakeries to each other, we talk about our phobias lol). She's showing me what the house values, and it's up to me whether or not I find that worthwhile. And if not - it's a free country and I don't need to continue.

After I received my 3rd bag from her at the end of last year (in total: 1 QB, 1 non-QB, 1 non-QB but somewhat difficult to obtain), I remember saying to her that I felt fortunate as I'm a bit inconsistent in my visits to the boutique. (Don't get me wrong, I'm still spending!) Her response was basically: I enjoy working with you because you make the interaction pleasant and you're respectful of the process, and that is not always the case with every client.

I'd agree that it's hard to approach all of this in a formulaic way, especially since there are no hard/fast rules. So I also understand why tpf members would recommend the reseller route if the goal is input = output. I'm appreciating what H is about, and while outwardly it may seem like I'm not getting much (lol I haven't gotten a single offer this year... uh oh) - any relationship takes time/effort, and there is some give/take on both sides. But hopefully, it'll be worth it.

 

[Bdbunny]

What typical others do/spend on/interact with the H has nothing to do with me because I am on my own in this journey. (If someone has to spend 3x for each QB, it is his/her/their story, not mine.)

I agree with this. What I have learned on my arduous Hermes journey is that everyone's journey is different and the only rule is that there is NO rule when it comes to Hermes! I think you must have a very special relationship with your SA. It sounds like she really understands you, especially looking back at your prior posts. Despite your bumps in the road with her, she has gotten you the bags you desire, and in such a short amount of time! Plus she offered you an SO, which some people wait YEARS to be offered. And didn't she also get you a cake on your birthday? I have a great relationship with my SAs and no one has ever gotten me cake on my birthday! I don't know what your secret is, but you must have a special connection with her. You are also very lucky and must be very charming to be able to get so many walk in offers in Paris and also in the U.S. I am quite envious to be honest! Most people need to spend 3x for a bag, but it sounds like you only spend 1x or less, and I am unlucky because I think I might spend 5x for my bags LOL. (one time yes, I was very lucky it was 0.13:1!) Or maybe my SA just doesn't like me very much LOL. I think in your particular situation, since you seem to be VIP at Madison Maison, I personally would not worry about shopping in different stores or with different SAs. It seems like they will understand and look the other way. You already told her about the Kelly messenger, and she said she's happy for you, so I would just keep shopping the way you are. It seems to be working for you! Anyways, at worst, even if she decides she won't offer you the SO when it arrives or offer bags to you anymore, good thing is you have a friend who works for Hermes who can hook you up with appointments at FSH in Paris so you can continue to get your 2 QBs/year there. As always, YMMV!

 

[880]

no one has ever gotten me cake on my birthday

Awwh, @Bdbunny , we will get you cake for your birthday and stick it in one of your many orange boxes

(SA barbie head charm on top of a candlestick)

 

[DME]

I’ve said the below before and I’ll repeat it again verbatim because I think it’s relevant to the current discussion. (See post #9,197 for the entire comment.) I have come to the conclusion that what seems like gatekeeping here is mostly people who are passionate about their way of shopping H. Is it always right? For them, yes! For you, maybe, maybe not. But instead of writing their input off as gatekeeping, try to keep an open mind and learn from them and their experiences. Adapt their method to how you shop and to your relationship with your SA and your store. This will only help you in the long run. As @880 and others have said, if you come here looking for an exact formula, you’re going to be disappointed. Spoiler alert: There isn’t one. Take the sum of the treasure trove of information you have here and make it your own. And be nice to your SA and your SM. They’re the ones who hold your (next) bag offer in their hands.

And now for my older post…

“What I see on this thread are people sharing personal experiences about what got them their bag in the hopes that it might serve as a guide - not a foolproof blueprint - for others. If readers spend any time on this thread, they see that things vary by country, by store in the same country, and even by SA in the same store, or by customer of the same SA. My advice to anyone who comes here is to take away one thing: That relationships are important at H. Just like in life. Use this thread as inspiration by taking what’s worked for others and figuring out how to make it your own based on your relationship with H, your SA, your shopping habits and, most importantly, your style and budget.”

 

[Logic]

My SA just offered me a b25, after the transaction at the counter, she tells me that my other QB on my wishlist being a K25, I can get it ‘next year’ but within the year I can get a non QB to just let her know which one. I like how the expectation has been set so obviously for me, it’s 1 QB a year.
Question: Does the QB system go by calendar or financial year? My SA made sure I picked up the bag by 30th June so I went on 29th.

 

[acrowcounted]

My SA just offered me a b25, after the transaction at the counter, she tells me that my other QB on my wishlist being a K25, I can get it ‘next year’ but within the year I can get a non QB to just let her know which one. I like how the expectation has been set so obviously for me, it’s 1 QB a year.
Question: Does the QB system go by calendar or financial year? My SA made sure I picked up the bag by 30th June so I went on 29th.

Calendar year. They also have personal and store wide sales goals that ended on the 30th so it was probably those metrics she was rushing for.