I think I've completely cracked
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Your ring is lovely!
Since price doesn't sound like an issue for you. And with your connections, you probably could find a good buy on a nice diamond bracelet (not tennis) or a beautiful yard of diamonds necklace. (Not talking the Tiffany DBTY.. Talk about a marketing con-job.
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Either one of these would satisfy you for many years. And your DH might like the idea that they are unique, especially estate pieces.
The yard of diamond necklace second hand, beautiful condition, about a $1,000 per ct, eye clean, fgh color, 18kt gold or plat. Better quality than if you bought new.
With your connections, you probably could buy one for half off or more.
Have a friend who had a 45ct yard of diamonds necklace done with emerald stones. Its very cool! However it was much more expensive than if she bought one that was an estate piece. Bet she got what she wanted which was something different.
The marketing dogma of how many months of income for an engagement ring has been around for decades. I was first engaged in 1982 & it was one month salary. (I remember first hearing this craziness in the 70's when my friends started to get engaged.) Somewhere along the line it got bumped up to two months.
The diamond industry came up with this to sell bigger rings. Its not a law past by state or God. Its just not any kind of rule that needs to adhere to.
Since price doesn't sound like an issue for you. And with your connections, you probably could find a good buy on a nice diamond bracelet (not tennis) or a beautiful yard of diamonds necklace. (Not talking the Tiffany DBTY.. Talk about a marketing con-job.
)Either one of these would satisfy you for many years. And your DH might like the idea that they are unique, especially estate pieces.
The yard of diamond necklace second hand, beautiful condition, about a $1,000 per ct, eye clean, fgh color, 18kt gold or plat. Better quality than if you bought new.
With your connections, you probably could buy one for half off or more.
Have a friend who had a 45ct yard of diamonds necklace done with emerald stones. Its very cool! However it was much more expensive than if she bought one that was an estate piece. Bet she got what she wanted which was something different.
The marketing dogma of how many months of income for an engagement ring has been around for decades. I was first engaged in 1982 & it was one month salary. (I remember first hearing this craziness in the 70's when my friends started to get engaged.) Somewhere along the line it got bumped up to two months.
The diamond industry came up with this to sell bigger rings. Its not a law past by state or God. Its just not any kind of rule that needs to adhere to.
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That's the exact compromise I made 10 years ago. I don't see the point shelling out money for a virtually identical ring to the one I already have and don't love.What about a pale yellow diamond? Kind of a compromise? Once you got a ring like others',there's a chance it's appeal might not be as strong anyway. And this way your ring would always remind you of your hubby.
Most jewelers wont take one type of stone to upgrade to a different type of stone. They would prefer to swap a diamond for a diamond. If you dont need to sell your existing ring to afford a new one, why dont you give up on the dream proposal and just pick the ring out together if the money is not an issue. Lots of people do it, especially after being married for a long time. Its not greedy to want it, if you can afford it.
I'm sorry; I do NOT understand where your husband is coming from. It's YOUR ring that you wear on YOUR finger. IMO, he's being inexcusably selfish rather than sentimental. His opinion on diamonds being "commonplace" is all well and dandy; you're not asking him to string diamonds around his manhood. He should want you to feel happy and proud everytime you look down at your finger. If it were me, I would really resent his view on this matter. Sorry for blasting you with my very strong opinion on this matter, but I'm not willing to wear ANY piece of jewelry on a daily basis if I'm not 100% over the moon with it.
I'm sorry your husband isn't more willing to discuss the idea of an upgrade to a diamond - I can see both perspectives of the upgrade/sentiment debate. But I always come back to the fact that, at the very least, irrespective of age at engagement, budget, priorities etc etc etc, the ring is something the woman wears.
I would still compile a potential list of alternatives. Work out for yourself exactly what you are looking for first, THEN go back to him and have the discussion that it's important to you to mark the occasion of 10 years of wonderful marriage with something special. It's an achievement and should be celebrated in true style with something that is meaningful to you as much as it is to him.
Good luck
I would still compile a potential list of alternatives. Work out for yourself exactly what you are looking for first, THEN go back to him and have the discussion that it's important to you to mark the occasion of 10 years of wonderful marriage with something special. It's an achievement and should be celebrated in true style with something that is meaningful to you as much as it is to him.
Good luck
Hi there! First, your rings are so pretty. The color of your yellow sapphire is incredible, and the cut is mesmerizing. Would you consider resetting it in a 3-stone setting, with two step-cut trapezoid or slim emerald cut white diamonds on either side? Or perhaps you could have a discreetly made wrap ring? Perhaps it would address your desire for diamonds and also satisfy the uniqueness your husband seeks?
I could possibly talk him into a reset. What does everyone think of this type of setting for my sapphire? I've been thinking for years it needs to be set in yellow gold instead of platinum. I've just been putting it off because I haven't wanted to invest the money:
I got this pic off the site of the jeweler who made my original ring, so I feel I can trust them for custom work.
I got this pic off the site of the jeweler who made my original ring, so I feel I can trust them for custom work.
I could possibly talk him into a reset. What does everyone think of this type of setting for my sapphire? I've been thinking for years it needs to be set in yellow gold instead of platinum. I've just been putting it off because I haven't wanted to invest the money:
I got this pic off the site of the jeweler who made my original ring, so I feel I can trust them for custom work.
would this make you happy? or would it be a change just because you can't get what you really want? don't spend the money unless you'll be completely in love with the final result!
I too wouldn't compromise honestly. I'd talk to my husband to try & understand what he's thinking (&so he feels heard). Then I'd knock some sense into him! it's on YOUR finger. You wear it daily. Why on Earth would he get to say no to your dream????? I'd keep your current ring to wear as is around him & get the ring you've been wanting.
Did he listen to your side, & what you've been wanting? Is he generally pretty selfish in other areas!? His way or the highway? I wouldn't bother to spend any $ if you're just going to be compromising again.
Did he listen to your side, & what you've been wanting? Is he generally pretty selfish in other areas!? His way or the highway? I wouldn't bother to spend any $ if you're just going to be compromising again.
You have made a very good point, and it's been why I haven't made any serious attempts at having the stone reset, or turned into a halo, or made into a three stone. It's not what I really want. However, since this is the ring I have, I feel like if I could fix some of the problems with the it, I'd be at least *happier* if not completely happy.
We've done ok financially because we're great at saving and have lived beneath our means (my sapphire ring was 1/20th of the amount he had in savings at the time, and we know have over double that). However, we're not high earners. We have to agree if we're going to spend this kind of money. I can't say I'd say yes to every one of his dreams necessarily.
No, not selfish at all. Extremely generous, actually. It's just a jewelry thing. We've been together 13 years and he has only been in a jewelry store a couple of times because I dragged him there when we got engaged. I was being very unrealistic, and perhaps unfair, to expect him to learn my favorites and surprise me with a ring. It's not who he is.
Awwww. You sound like a very sweet woman & he's lucky to have you. I'm glad he's more reasonable in other areas.
Good luck deciding. I hope you're able to find something you both love & are able to reflect that just switching to switch things up might leave you in a similar spot with a different ring.
I forgot to mention your sapphire ring is lovely
I do like the split shank rings. I have a yellow diamond set into one & I really love it. The side stones really sparkle, but I'm not sure if they'd give you the same look you're after. Have you seen one in person? Or if you have a peg head, you could switch out just the prongs to yellow gold instead of a whole new setting
Good luck deciding. I hope you're able to find something you both love & are able to reflect that just switching to switch things up might leave you in a similar spot with a different ring.
I forgot to mention your sapphire ring is lovely
I do like the split shank rings. I have a yellow diamond set into one & I really love it. The side stones really sparkle, but I'm not sure if they'd give you the same look you're after. Have you seen one in person? Or if you have a peg head, you could switch out just the prongs to yellow gold instead of a whole new setting
Can you perhaps come up with a budget for your 10th anniversary gifts to each other first, and THEN try exchanging shortlists for each other to choose from?
Once he agrees the method and the budget, surely his preference for items other than diamonds becomes void if you've stayed under budget?? It's not like you're going to object to things on his wish list because of your preferences (you want a belt sander honey? Sorry, I don't really like belt sanders, I'd prefer to buy you an angle grinder...)
Once he agrees the method and the budget, surely his preference for items other than diamonds becomes void if you've stayed under budget?? It's not like you're going to object to things on his wish list because of your preferences (you want a belt sander honey? Sorry, I don't really like belt sanders, I'd prefer to buy you an angle grinder...)