How to dodge the "how much did that purse cost" question?
- Thread starter isabellam
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I've had a few people, friends, ask me that question and it didn't even occur to me to dodge the answer since anyone who really wants to know can just look it up on line, but then again, I didn't immediately assume that the only reason that person wanted to know was to judge me harshly. Probably blind naivete on my part.
Here's the thing, though, if someone wants to judge me harshly for spending $xyz$ on a purse, well they're welcome to do so. Makes no difference to me. It's certainly not going to stop me from buying whatever bag I want to buy. Though it might make me think twice about considering that person as a friend.
I suppose if I was in a situation where I really didn't want to answer I would say, "Why? Are you going to copy me and run out and buy the exact same purse?" And if that didn't work I would just refuse to answer.
Here's the thing, though, if someone wants to judge me harshly for spending $xyz$ on a purse, well they're welcome to do so. Makes no difference to me. It's certainly not going to stop me from buying whatever bag I want to buy. Though it might make me think twice about considering that person as a friend.
I suppose if I was in a situation where I really didn't want to answer I would say, "Why? Are you going to copy me and run out and buy the exact same purse?" And if that didn't work I would just refuse to answer.
Great thread and what a tricky subject! no right answer but many good answers and suggestions have been shared.
If I see a bag or shoes I fall in love with on someone, I will ask; what brand and where they got them - that's it, I leave the pricing up to me to decide when I get there, as bottom line I don't think its any of my business what they paid.
I would say to someone who asked me (if I didn't know them) 'what is your price range for handbags?' then (likely) say 'this one isn't in that bracket (not in a condescending manner!) but you can have a look at X shop/website if you can't live without it like me!.
It depends alot on how genuinely interested they are as opposed to just wanting to snob you off with a harsh judgement because they don't approve of how you spend your money, or can see its a more than $100 bag.
As other members have said, with people who don't get handbag lust, it is difficult because they can be harsh. People who love handbags I find, even if their top price for a bag is different to mine, often aren't harsh - they just accept that we spend different $ on bags but still share the same underlying love for bags.
I find the judgment annoying (esp from people who don't even carry a handbag!) as I save to get my bags, and make allowances in other areas of my life to do so - I don't drink, smoke, buy lunches & snacks, go on massive shopping sprees etc, because I want the bag I'm lusting over in a ridiculous fashion instead
Often these people who make nasty comments are jealous because they don't have the motivation to do what's necessary to buy more expensive items and it's just too easy to slag off those who do, IMHO.
Bottom line - we have to lug around crap daily and should be able to do it in our gorgeous arm candy without being judged for it by anyone - bags give such a boost to our day, the negativity is so unnecessary!
If I see a bag or shoes I fall in love with on someone, I will ask; what brand and where they got them - that's it, I leave the pricing up to me to decide when I get there, as bottom line I don't think its any of my business what they paid.
I would say to someone who asked me (if I didn't know them) 'what is your price range for handbags?' then (likely) say 'this one isn't in that bracket (not in a condescending manner!) but you can have a look at X shop/website if you can't live without it like me!.
It depends alot on how genuinely interested they are as opposed to just wanting to snob you off with a harsh judgement because they don't approve of how you spend your money, or can see its a more than $100 bag.
As other members have said, with people who don't get handbag lust, it is difficult because they can be harsh. People who love handbags I find, even if their top price for a bag is different to mine, often aren't harsh - they just accept that we spend different $ on bags but still share the same underlying love for bags.
I find the judgment annoying (esp from people who don't even carry a handbag!) as I save to get my bags, and make allowances in other areas of my life to do so - I don't drink, smoke, buy lunches & snacks, go on massive shopping sprees etc, because I want the bag I'm lusting over in a ridiculous fashion instead
Often these people who make nasty comments are jealous because they don't have the motivation to do what's necessary to buy more expensive items and it's just too easy to slag off those who do, IMHO.Bottom line - we have to lug around crap daily and should be able to do it in our gorgeous arm candy without being judged for it by anyone - bags give such a boost to our day, the negativity is so unnecessary!
A little while ago I was sitting in the loungs in the hotel lobby ordering a drink and the waitress and I chatted a bit. She complimented my bag, then asked how much it cost. She was so nice about it that I went ahead and told her. I'm sure she sees a lot of them in this hotel and was just curious how expensive they are.
LolSort of off topic, but Igot to thinking of this girl once who gave me a huge rant at a houseparty about my shoes... "look at your fancy shoes ms. fancy. How much were they, huh??? My shoes were only 20$ and theyre as nice as yours!!! blahblahblah" I didnt answer but I must admit I choked a giggle when her heel snapped clean off 20 minutes later on her way down the stairs.:lolots: (she didnt get hurt, but pretty drenched in beer)
Either respond with 'a lot' or 'you don't want to know' usually get them to even dig deeper into it. It went as far as a new colleague after getting the response of 'you don't want to know' when asking me about the cost of my Celine croc phantom, bugged me enough where I finally let her know of the cost and her immediate response was 'OMG, you can afford that working here? How?'. Needless to say, I was more than offended by such a personal question but suppose she just couldn't grasp the salary someone could be making in a corporate sales environment and finishing in top 10 in the country. The most unfortunate part is for me is that someone like her who is so quick to judge me based on material things that I have will never truly see how hard I work each day pulling 50-60 hours a week and going on weeks without a true day off with my work cell turned off. 
. I'm proud of the achievements and little gifts I can bestow upon myself whenever an opportunity rises. And also along the way, realized that I just can't win them all. .
. I'm proud of the achievements and little gifts I can bestow upon myself whenever an opportunity rises. And also along the way, realized that I just can't win them all. .
I will generally say "a lot" or "too much." Most people I have encountered don't press for an answer after my reply.
Funny story:
I was using public transport this other day, like allways and I sat beside this foreign man. He took one look at me and started to have an conversation, asking about my life and I viceverse did same for him. Conversation turned to outlooks, he showed me a picture of him wearing a really nice suit.
Then he touched a littlebit my handbag, which by the way was this expensive looking fur/leather/brass- thing I just purchased for fun. Nothing premiere, but really well made.
Then he asked me: " ..and..how much this cost?", little dreaming look in his eyes. I just hit with the cold reality, like I usually do " I got it from the fleamarket, where people sell their old thigs and it cost 10 euros."
Needles to say. He looked SO disappointed.lol, but satisfaction was mine.
I was using public transport this other day, like allways and I sat beside this foreign man. He took one look at me and started to have an conversation, asking about my life and I viceverse did same for him. Conversation turned to outlooks, he showed me a picture of him wearing a really nice suit.
Then he touched a littlebit my handbag, which by the way was this expensive looking fur/leather/brass- thing I just purchased for fun. Nothing premiere, but really well made.
Then he asked me: " ..and..how much this cost?", little dreaming look in his eyes. I just hit with the cold reality, like I usually do " I got it from the fleamarket, where people sell their old thigs and it cost 10 euros."
Needles to say. He looked SO disappointed.lol, but satisfaction was mine.
Sort of off topic, but Igot to thinking of this girl once who gave me a huge rant at a houseparty about my shoes... "look at your fancy shoes ms. fancy. How much were they, huh??? My shoes were only 20$ and theyre as nice as yours!!! blahblahblah
You know you're going to hell for that, don't you?
Save me a spot.
This is usually what I say. I only tell prices to those people that I know are purse lovers like myself.