**Hermes Chat**

[Jahboozey]

My wife wants a Birkin, and it’s all she’s been talking about…

So here’s the deal: my wife Jess has been going on about this Hermès Birkin bag she’s absolutely fallen in love with. She’s shown me every color, every size, the whole story behind it. I get that the Birkin is more than a bag—it’s a statement, something she’s been dreaming about for years. But it’s not just about the purse; it’s a symbol of the life she really wants, the life we’re both working hard to build.

Things have been a little rough for us financially. Groceries, gas, and bills seem to keep piling up, and my job is demanding but doesn’t really cover everything we’d like. We’ve had some long nights talking about what we’re missing and what we want. I know that Birkin means a lot to her; she deserves a win, something to feel proud of. But I’m also worried it’s not realistic right now.

Last Friday, we went out to one of our usual bars, trying to unwind, and Jess was a little more down than usual. She drank a bit, laughed, danced, then got quiet on the way home, telling me she worries we’ll never get where we want to be. I know she’s carrying more than she lets on. I told her she’s more than enough, but I feel like it’s going to take more than words to help her feel secure.

Any advice on how to make her feel appreciated or supported when we can’t swing her dream bag right now? Or has anyone found other ways to show their partner they’re enough, even when life feels like a constant uphill climb?

 

[rumes]

dear @Jahboozey
When I was a little girl, I would always admire my mother’s LV cigarette's bag. For some reason, I associated its slender yet dignified presence with the idea of being a strong woman.

As I grew up, I bought myself an LV bag with my first paycheck. And that day, I realized that nothing you can buy with money could give me that power what ever i saw on my mum.

People search for what they feel is missing within themselves. For some of us, it's health; for others, it's a possession; and for some, it's a child. And this search never ends.

The only thing you can fulfill her expectations with right now is your love. The feeling created by a loving embrace cannot be provided by any possession, nor should it be.

Life is never perfect for anyone. It might seem ironic that someone with a few H bags at home is saying this, but I want to clarify: I am a mother who has spent months leaving my children behind to stay in a chemotherapy room. The only thing allowed to be with me in that room was a Birkin bag. In that moment, I would have sacrificed it for my children to be there with me. I believe you understand what I mean.

Money and the things it can bring are very important. I can never deny that nothing, not even health, exists without it, unfortunately. However, a person’s self-confidence and happiness shouldn't depend on it.

I hope your wifey reaches this awareness without having to pay (spiritual) costs in her and your life.

 

[SDC2003]

My wife wants a Birkin, and it’s all she’s been talking about…

So here’s the deal: my wife Jess has been going on about this Hermès Birkin bag she’s absolutely fallen in love with. She’s shown me every color, every size, the whole story behind it. I get that the Birkin is more than a bag—it’s a statement, something she’s been dreaming about for years. But it’s not just about the purse; it’s a symbol of the life she really wants, the life we’re both working hard to build.

Things have been a little rough for us financially. Groceries, gas, and bills seem to keep piling up, and my job is demanding but doesn’t really cover everything we’d like. We’ve had some long nights talking about what we’re missing and what we want. I know that Birkin means a lot to her; she deserves a win, something to feel proud of. But I’m also worried it’s not realistic right now.

Last Friday, we went out to one of our usual bars, trying to unwind, and Jess was a little more down than usual. She drank a bit, laughed, danced, then got quiet on the way home, telling me she worries we’ll never get where we want to be. I know she’s carrying more than she lets on. I told her she’s more than enough, but I feel like it’s going to take more than words to help her feel secure.

Any advice on how to make her feel appreciated or supported when we can’t swing her dream bag right now? Or has anyone found other ways to show their partner they’re enough, even when life feels like a constant uphill climb?

Has your wife actually thought about whether the bag would work for her. Lots of times we think we know what we want until we see it in person or actually own it. Lifestyle also changes as we age. It may help to go to a consignment store to see these bags in person. Totes aren’t for everyone. They’re not secure. Would she feel comfortable carrying it everyday wherever she goes? Think about cost per wear. Crime? I’d also encourage her to stop watching luxury videos and posts on social media. There’s so much hype in sm for luxury culture. Most of it’s unrealistic and fake anyway with so many of these people in debt or living paycheck to paycheck. The birkin is no longer a symbol of a life achieved but a life mimicked. Back in the day sure but today I see people from all walks of life and life stages including teens with this bag. Also if your wife is wanting the bag from the store I would stay far away. The store experience can be extremely unhealthy for some people who are trying to fill a void in their lives.

 

[rumes]

The birkin is no longer a symbol of a life achieved but a life mimicked.

💯

 

[880]

My wife wants a Birkin, and it’s all she’s been talking about…

So here’s the deal: my wife Jess has been going on about this Hermès Birkin bag she’s absolutely fallen in love with. She’s shown me every color, every size, the whole story behind it. I get that the Birkin is more than a bag—it’s a statement, something she’s been dreaming about for years. But it’s not just about the purse; it’s a symbol of the life she really wants, the life we’re both working hard to build.

Things have been a little rough for us financially. Groceries, gas, and bills seem to keep piling up, and my job is demanding but doesn’t really cover everything we’d like. We’ve had some long nights talking about what we’re missing and what we want. I know that Birkin means a lot to her; she deserves a win, something to feel proud of. But I’m also worried it’s not realistic right now.

Last Friday, we went out to one of our usual bars, trying to unwind, and Jess was a little more down than usual. She drank a bit, laughed, danced, then got quiet on the way home, telling me she worries we’ll never get where we want to be. I know she’s carrying more than she lets on. I told her she’s more than enough, but I feel like it’s going to take more than words to help her feel secure.

Any advice on how to make her feel appreciated or supported when we can’t swing her dream bag right now? Or has anyone found other ways to show their partner they’re enough, even when life feels like a constant uphill climb?

Many of us have waited decades to afford luxury items. It’s important to be happy with whatever you have right now. Or, you might find that if you save up for a b, it’s not all that you anticipated. At the end of the day, it cannot compete with a happy life or good health as per @rumes . (I’m speaking as someone who has been married over thirty years and didn’t start shopping Hermes bags until I was over 40. My advice is to make her feel supported in other, non material ways. I truly wish you all the best!

ETA: I also agree with @SDC2003 , to stop watching social media.

 

[rumes]

I believe everything has its time. The happiness I felt when I ate Happy Meals first time at McDonald's when it first opened in Istanbul in the '90s can't be compared to any hamburger I eat today. There's a unique joy that comes from getting something at the right time and within your means.

After all, nothing you acquire by disturbing family harmony can make you feel complete, right?

I hope to avoid such a situation, for myself and for everyone.

Thank you @880 for quoting me. You always touch on very important points and provide us with a truly accurate perspective.

🍀

 

[tinkerbell68]

@Jahboozey I have little to add to all of the previous thoughtful responses to your questions/concerns, other than to reiterate @880 and @SDC2003 recommendation that your wife stop watching social media! Even just taking a month away from tPF last January was helpful to me...it's hard to see others getting offers/bags that you want and can make you feel 'less than.' Even when I remind myself that people only post what they want others to see, it can seem that they lead enchanted lives, which, of course, is not the whole picture.

 

[_marshy]

hello everyone, i am curious if i can purchase an hermes bag from a reseller company that “guarantees 100% authenticity” but have it sent to the hermes spa first… if bag is not authentic then i can get my money back, otherwise, i am a happy lamb with a guaranteed authentic hermes bag.

dilemma: hermes spa takes about 6-9 months or depending on the work needed to be done…and reseller companies usually only give 7 days to return.

i would love to hear your thoughts.

 

[OnlyModa]

I believe everything has its time. The happiness I felt when I ate Happy Meals first time at McDonald's when it first opened in Istanbul in the '90s can't be compared to any hamburger I eat today. There's a unique joy that comes from getting something at the right time and within your means.

After all, nothing you acquire by disturbing family harmony can make you feel complete, right?

I hope to avoid such a situation, for myself and for everyone.

Thank you @880 for quoting me. You always touch on very important points and provide us with a truly accurate perspective.

🍀

Thank you for bringing back that memory! When McDonald’s first opened in the Old Country in the 90s, there was such a huge line, and it was such an enjoyable moment! If somebody gifted me a Birkin at that time, I would’ve traded it for a place in front of the line of that McDonald’s! You’re right, no Berger has compared since and I have had some lovely Michelin burgers since

 

[rumes]

Thank you for bringing back that memory! When McDonald’s first opened in the Old Country in the 90s, there was such a huge line, and it was such an enjoyable moment! If somebody gifted me a Birkin at that time, I would’ve traded it for a place in front of the line of that McDonald’s! You’re right, no Berger has compared since and I have had some lovely Michelin burgers since

Great to know that someone else is in the same place as me. For a long time in my life, my object of desire was the Esmeralda toy that came with the Happy Meal (even though my house was full of Barbies). Lool.

 

[880]

hello everyone, i am curious if i can purchase an hermes bag from a reseller company that “guarantees 100% authenticity” but have it sent to the hermes spa first… if bag is not authentic then i can get my money back, otherwise, i am a happy lamb with a guaranteed authentic hermes bag.

dilemma: hermes spa takes about 6-9 months or depending on the work needed to be done…and reseller companies usually only give 7 days to return.

i would love to hear your thoughts.

Get @bababebi to authenticate by photos before you buy. And do not buy via wire transfer. I only purchase via PayPal backed by cc. I do not usually buy bags from TRR (due to return policy) and I never purchase from instagram or facebook; and rarely from an individual seller. If your bag is not in need of spa services, Hermes may not take it. They are pretty savvy as to this type of authentication work around

 

[nymeria]

hello everyone, i am curious if i can purchase an hermes bag from a reseller company that “guarantees 100% authenticity” but have it sent to the hermes spa first… if bag is not authentic then i can get my money back, otherwise, i am a happy lamb with a guaranteed authentic hermes bag.

dilemma: hermes spa takes about 6-9 months or depending on the work needed to be done…and reseller companies usually only give 7 days to return.

i would love to hear your thoughts.

If you are at all concerned about authenticity, then prior to purchase, work with a third party authenticator ( for example, Bababebi).
Minimal money for peace of mind and lack of drama.
The H spa does not function as a free authentication service, and could confiscate the bag if it's not real.
HTH

 

[rumes]

Even though I started Halloween morning by vacuuming the house with Dyson, lool, modern age effects 🤣
I ended it with a nice massage.

I also celebrate Diwali for those who are observing it. May light always be in our lives 🤍

 

[Bdbunny]

I love that Hermes, particularly its unique colorways while offering great to variety are consistent over decades.

I totally agree and was actually thinking the exact same thing! When I received my etoupe leather pants, I looked around in my closet and found a crop top I barely wore from a couple years ago that coordinated perfectly with the pants! and I also realized a tunic I bought last year also matches with my Rouge H Kelly elan purchased this year. I too was thinking how nice it was that their colorways are consistent across years, but still offers some variety.

they never work with me to complete an outfit; I never get a text saying you bought that skirt we just received a top that would be a perfect match; i’m never suggested a pair of shoes and so on

I feel like this may be an SA-dependent thing... My SA is pretty good about helping me coordinate my outfits. Just the last visit, he pointed out that a certain top would match really well with the Rouge H kelly elan he sold me earlier. (of course he was probably just trying to sell me the top LOL.) He is in general pretty good at remembering different things I've purchased from him before... and even my SM mentioned something when we were at the re-see that she noticed I already had a similar leather jacket in my profile, so let's not also get this one. My FSH SA goes one step further and sometimes even has hair and makeup styling suggestions to complete the "look" LOL!!

 

[zonnebloem]

Do any of you know whether an SA gets a commission on the Grooming Bag and whether it would also count towards pre-spend?