Does wearing your bling make you feel more confident or more self-conscious?

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ame

ame

O.G.
Mar 22, 2007
13,432
1,039
#1
I rarely feel totally self-conscious (about my jewelry, I always feel like a whale getting stared at) but lately I have gotten some more "interesting" comments and a lot more stares. Which is odd because I wear my small studs only a few times a week, if that, and my ering and two bands (one plain, one diamond), not always but more than half the time. I am mostly non-descript. I normally was really non-emotional about it, not really feeling confident but certainly not self-conscious. But now I have noticed that more people are noticing them, and I think it seems to depend on where I am and what kind of comments I receive. Lately it's been self-conscious, guilty even, though that's mostly due to the comments of a few former friends.

So I was curious....is there a mixed bag, or do you always feel one way or the other?
 
#2
I've always wondered about that too...because i find myself feeling somewhat between feeling confident and self-conscious, as in, I try to be confident and feel confident most times, yet I am still curious of what other people think ....thus making myself self-conscious, if you know what i mean?

I'm not fully engaged yet, so I can't reeeally answer you question probably the way you wanted, but I wanted to contribute. I'm trying to finalize on the setting that I want (I posted a thread with the images if you feel like helping out!). but I always always wondered whether I would feel too self-conscious if my stone was too big. my BF wanted to get me the largest rock he can manage in his budget and for sure I didn't convince him NOT to get me the largest one possible, b/c ...you know..:blushing: but I have wondered if something smaller would've been nicer b/c I might have felt a little more comfortable. (he got 1.69 round brilliant cut) also the fact that I'm still a student (in a medical school) and will go through hospital rounds and residency...I wondered if too flashy of an e-ring might be a problem? but then I saw some of the other pre-doctor ladies in Purseforum and theirs was gorgeous and bling-ey! so I figured maybe I can pull it off too....:D

I do think where you are and what kind of comments you receive has everything to do with how you feel about wearing your bling at that moment though. and I most likely will turn my diamond around to my palm if I'm made to feel really uncomfortable....
 
#3
i definitely feel self-conscious when i'm wearing my e-ring & stacks. i guess because of where i live, it's a small college town and people are typically very laid back and casual here, so to be honest, you don't see many women walking around with 3 carat diamond rings here. it's not like the coasts where you see it everywhere. when i'm in denver, however, i don't feel this way, but where i live i definitely feel a little self-conscious—but of course, that doesn't stop me from wearing it. :graucho:
 
#4
This is an interesting question......I never feel self-conscious but I do question myself on ......"seriously, how much diamonds, other jewelry do I really need"........it's a constant battle with myself. I feel like I can be doing something more 'worthy' with the money or not spending the money at all (truly a novel idea for me). I really don't care what other people think about me because what I buy/wear, etc. is solely for me and noone else. I have worked in a jewelry store for close to 10 yrs now and have accumulated over the years quite a booty of jewelry. I have now sold a large percentage of it. Why? I don't like looking like "Diamond Lil" anymore......I let myself get caught up in the moment when I purchased my prior pieces. I do have a large ctr. diamond on my wed ring and wear lg. twt dia studs everyday but all of my other jewelry I have toned down - A Lot! I agree that if you live or are visiting a bigger city (LA, NY, Chicago, etc) wearing the jewels and carrying the designer bags is not even noticed. I live in a small town in the midwest where though a large majority of the population doesn't really seem to care about bling, designer items, etc. I can feel self-conscious more carrying a LV around than the jewelry I wear.

The topic definitely makes you think.....good one. Thanks.
 
#5
Neither. . .

It just feels like "me".

Once in a while, depending on the area I'm in I am keenly aware of my bigger pieces and I may choose not to wear them for safety reasons. But on a daily basis I don't even think about it.
 
#6
Swanky Mama Of Three said:
Neither. . .

It just feels like "me".

Once in a while, depending on the area I'm in I am keenly aware of my bigger pieces and I may choose not to wear them for safety reasons. But on a daily basis I don't even think about it.
Click to expand...


That's what I was thinking. Maybe because I've worn them for so long, they are just a part of what I wear every day.
 
#8
^^Yep, Cedar Rapids, IA and Bev Hills, CA = HUGE DIFFERENCE in everday attire, jewelry, etc. I have lived here for 10 yrs now but came from Chicago so it was quite the adjustment going from where it's basically the norm to see people in designer duds, nice fine jewelry, bags, etc. to not-so-much of that........John Deere is more revered than any designer bag could ever be.......and I'm not kidding.:smile1:
 
#9
Swanky Mama Of Three said:
Neither. . .

It just feels like "me".

Once in a while, depending on the area I'm in I am keenly aware of my bigger pieces and I may choose not to wear them for safety reasons. But on a daily basis I don't even think about it.
Click to expand...

I feel the same way - of course, the flip side is that on the very rare days when I'm not wearing it, I feel kind of nekkid :wondering I'm also prone to brief panic attacks because I'll realize I'm not wearing it and think I left it on a bathroom counter somewhere, before remembering that it's safely at home (^(oo)^)
 
#10
Swanky Mama Of Three said:
Neither. . .

It just feels like "me".

Once in a while, depending on the area I'm in I am keenly aware of my bigger pieces and I may choose not to wear them for safety reasons. But on a daily basis I don't even think about it.
Click to expand...

That is how I feel too. I love my jewelry and i get great pleasure from looking at it. I am sure the people I know
think I am showing off but I am not. It's like when someone says, "oh is that a Chanel bag?" and I wonder what they are thinking. But again, this is me - just like always being "dressed" and always wearing make-up.

i remember when I was young having this kind of discussion with a very wise woman and her answer was:
who better to deserve it" so there you go:D
 
#11
Bagaday said:
This is an interesting question......I never feel self-conscious but I do question myself on ......"seriously, how much diamonds, other jewelry do I really need"........it's a constant battle with myself. I feel like I can be doing something more 'worthy' with the money or not spending the money at all (truly a novel idea for me). I really don't care what other people think about me because what I buy/wear, etc. is solely for me and noone else. I have worked in a jewelry store for close to 10 yrs now and have accumulated over the years quite a booty of jewelry. I have now sold a large percentage of it. Why? I don't like looking like "Diamond Lil" anymore......I let myself get caught up in the moment when I purchased my prior pieces. I do have a large ctr. diamond on my wed ring and wear lg. twt dia studs everyday but all of my other jewelry I have toned down - A Lot! I agree that if you live or are visiting a bigger city (LA, NY, Chicago, etc) wearing the jewels and carrying the designer bags is not even noticed. I live in a small town in the midwest where though a large majority of the population doesn't really seem to care about bling, designer items, etc. I can feel self-conscious more carrying a LV around than the jewelry I wear.

The topic definitely makes you think.....good one. Thanks.
Click to expand...

Great quote....:tup:

I couldn't have said it better. Me being a LA girl 10 years removed, I never felt self - conscious about my jewelry, hanbags etc... cause it was like the norm. Plus I saw so many e-rings and wedding rings that were so breathtaking they made my diamonds look like pebbles.... lol... However, since I am living in and traveling through the South, at times I feel that people may think that I am to " flashy " yet, that is not the case at all. I've had people say to me on many occasions " You ain't from here, I can tell " It used to bother me, but, now I just put it in the right perspective.
So, based on my personal experience, I think it could be both..

By the way, thank you for starting such a enjoyable thread...;)
 
#13
I feel guilty at times because I live in a small town/state where designer things and big diamonds are only seen during tourist season so my 2ct set has had some weird comments and often is out of place. I get asked alot if its real.. The nerve of people! But that is often asked about my designer purses and sunglasses also..And when other woman compare their small stone to mind I feel bad. But than I get the people that love it and tell me its beautiful. For me it depends on where I am, and I need to get over the fact that some one out there will always be a downer.
 
#14
OOOOh So I love Tiffany jewerly and often wear alot, so one day at work this girl and her friend said how much they love my Tiffany jewelry and than a 3rd friend put in her 2 cents by saying "well I guess tiffany knockoffs are easy to get around here!" OMG I wanted to slap that girl! I was so offended that I was speechless and walked off!
 
#15
I find no matter how comfortable you feel or whether you possess that, "I could care less attitude", someone, somewhere, sometime will eventually pass judgement. It's just what people do. You can prevent it, people are just people. I've learned long ago that I cannot save the world, change people's attitudes or minds, or control their thoughts.

That being said, my work keeps me humble. I give a lot back to the community and people in general- I'm a sucker when it comes to helping others......occupational hazzard I suppose.

I don't ever feel guilty or self-conscious....on the contrary.....I'm proud to wear my jewellery, especially my wedding band, e-ring, and Anni band as it serves to be a vital symbol of the commitment to the greatest love of my life....my DH. I look at my hands everyday & remain very thankful for what I have.

By the way.......there are a select group of women here that have *bling* galore but are the kindest, most genuine, sincere, and thoughtful, caring individuals imaginable.

It's all in the way you carry yourself :smile1:
 
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