Like most others, I try to avoid getting that first scratch, but I (typically) breathe a sigh of relief once I have it and find that I enjoy the bag more. A case in point--I took my brand new Ralph Lauren Ricky chain bag -
http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main...C0F9&Ntt=ralph+lauren+ricky&N=0&bmUID=kYDf5x2 -- to a concert tonight and it came home with its first few scratches. C'est la vie. I bought it to use primarily on weekends (for events exactly like the one I took it to tonight) and am relieved to know that it scratches well, meaning the scratches aren't that noticeable and work well with the bag's style and color. This bag will look cooler with even more scratches

.
I'm a big Celine fan and inquired about the choice of palmelato calfskin (this scratches immediately) for most of the Blade bags when I visited the NYC boutique about a year ago. I was told the choice was intentional -- the bag is not intended to be kept in pristine condition. That makes sense to me. It is a crossbody with a very urban feel, and it does look cooler with a few scratches. I've come to feel the same way about my Marni trunk bag. It is very structured, but is also urban in style and constructed of very soft leather. It got scratched immediately, and I like it better this way. Hmmm, structured and very soft leather--maybe this is my style!
I think the leather I like just tends to wear and get scratched more easily than other leathers. I tried saffiano briefly and hated it. My
Fendi crayons wallet developed white spots in less than a year and it always looked plastic-y to me anyway, as did my
Fendi 2Jours. I sold both.
I agree 100% that it is no good to appear to be a slave to one's bag. It strikes me as inelegant. I know someone who will put her bag on her chair behind her in restaurants (if another chair isn't free), rather than put it on the floor. Then, she teeters on the tip of her chair the whole meal--sigh.
People put stickers on bags?!?! Egads!!! That sounds horrible. I also really dislike stains and significant loss of shape. Either would probably cause me to stop using a bag. Of course, the shape thing depends on the bag. My PS1s are slouching beautifully, as they are intended to do, and I love them even more now. But my Marni trunk bag really needs to retain its shape . . .