Do you ever feel guilty about your handbag/shopping habit?

[hikkichan]

I started buying Coach when I was 22 and had my first Chanel in my late twenties. Nobody funded my bags in the beginning until my then bf bought me a couple of them.

I turn 33 this year. After 10 years of collecting and re-selling, I'm no longer obsessed about bags.

So no more guilt involved. As for clothes on the other hand...

 

[papertiger]

Paying off my student loans made me pretty darn happy! I would STRONGLY encourage you to focus on those loans HARD. They're not going to go away any time soon unless you throw some serious money at them. And they do grow if you neglect them.

Use bags as a reward. Something like $500 towards a bag for every $10K you pay off. If you have other debts, credit cards, cars, whatever, can be included in this too. You might benefit from getting rid of some of those smaller debts to free up money for the student loan. You can buy a bag at that price point or save them for a more expensive bag later. Buying bags is fun, but so is seeing those debt balances drop!

I think a lot of my guilt stems from the fact that I have a lot of student loan debt...
but purses make me so happy

Student loans are a big thing and as paculina said they will have to paid off sometime or they may get in the way of other important goals. For instance, if you ever want an apartment the mortgage company will take into consideration your SL as a debt already outstanding. If you pay something towards your SL regularly it will all add-up, you shouldn't beat yourself up about it if you're dealing with it.

Handbag purchases don't have to cost a fortune esp preloved, careful budgeting and cutting back on everyday treats like coffee cheapest option, we can enjoy looking and learning without having to buy lots of new bags. And you have some lovely bags you enjoy. Enjoy them without regrets.

 

[papertiger]

I don't feel guilty if I plan the purchase and know going to use it and keep it forever.

I sometimes worry post-purchase if I've made a spontaneous decision such as buying a bag in sale that I'd not considered. I don't believe people can save money by spending more. My doubt is a search for a logical explanation to justify such uncharacteristic behaviour LOL. It's forgotten once I use whatever bag though because then I have justified the purchase.

 

[papertiger]

i don't have guilt. purchases shouldn't bring guilt. if it does, imo, that's your inner conscience telling you something. we rarely experience guilt over doing stuff that is "right," so if it feels wrong or guilty, you should be questioning why. just personal opinion, but i think much of the guilt comes from the $ part for women - many have to make a choice between that money going towards the family or themselves and they feel bad taking $ away from the family

In part I agree with you, in a healthy way guilt would be a sign someone hasn't made the right choice(s). I rather think women have it drummed into them they shouldn't spend lots of money on themselves, family or not.

We are conflicted because we're trying to be good, fit in, get ahead etc and society both pushes us to spend money on things through magazines, 'newsletters', insta, peer pressure, raised credit limits and not spend money except on essentials, others, family and charity simultaneously. We are all somehow caught in the middle trying, trying, trying to do the right thing and be good/looked up to.

It's very easy to make fun of, criticise or chastise women because quite frankly we can't win whatever we do, even the fact that some of us have money and power to spend it on what we choose is a relatively new and uncommon thing historically and/or geographically. Perhaps I've worked out why the phrase 'First World problems' jars with me a bit, that some of us have money and freedom to spend it on whatever or just save it is often used as another way to beat us up - if we don't get there first of course with our guilt, off-setting 'indulgences' with penitence. I'm sure as women we have more in common with our sisters all round the world than we imagine.

 

[LilylynnLux]

This was a very interesting question! I don't' feel guilty. I rarely clothes shop and for years my sole financial splurge was going to Las Vegas. For years I'd go to Las Vegas and have a great time - sometimes win and sometimes lose - but would feel guilty and always come home and say "I could have bought a really nice handbag and at least I'd still have something tangible". Then my yearly trip would come up again and I'd turn around and go to Vegas & come home and say "I could have bought a really nice handbag!" So the next time I thought about going to Vegas I went into Louis Vuitton instead and bought a Duomo and a Speedy Bandouliere. Not once have I ever looked at those bags and thought "I should have gone to Las Vegas!" Lol. So I guess I don't feel guilty cause I would have spent the money - I just made a better choice, in my opinion, as to what to spend it on. Not saying I'll never go to Vegas again but if I do I'll be getting on the plane with an orange bag vs ATM receipts.

 

[Scully Piper]

i would like to wake up from sleep to see that on my table[emoji2]

Me too [emoji1]

 

[Yuki85]

I do feel guilty. My first premier designer bag I bought was when I was 22. It was a Gucci bag. I spent almost my whole " first" salary and I was soooo happy. Since then I started my collection until today .... I was/am/will be always BAG obsessed. I do not buy high-end designer cloths/shoes. Now I am married and my hubby and I share the fix costs for our apartment. And we pay our bill. He said that my BAG budget is 5000 EUR/year, no matter from his money or my own. Both our us work hard and he has his thing ... Shoes!!! Nobody either from my family/friends understand my obsession...I used to try to explain this to them but now I do not do this anymore. Instead, I found this wonderful forum where I can share my love to bags with you and to get judged.
It is my money and I don't feel guilty at all
Thank you for letting me share!!!

 

[ern2965]

I don't. I'm single, pay ALL my own bills and expenses, and don't have anyone to buy me nice things that being said, I try and keep my bag habit within a reasonable limit. That is, I buy what I like, at a price I'm comfortable with, and use them.

Bags that I don't use, or maybe don't care much for anymore, I sell. My recent rule is one in, one out. I've tried to stick to that as much as I can. I'm finally in a place financially where I CAN afford to splurge. To me, its no different than someone who spends money on stuff for their home, car, or anything else they like. I don't buy high high end. My obsession is kate spade, so most of mine are hers, with a handful of vintage Coach, and a couple of Dooneys thrown in. And my latest gem; the $800 Catherine Malandrino I found new for $50. I also sell not only bags, but clothing etc on Poshmark and a couple other sites,, so any earnings from that, plus my semi regular dog sitting, go into a separate account, and that's what I use to buy nice things.

I did sit down the other day and make a list of how many bags I've bought in the past year (close to 25) and how much I've spent on them. Plus how much I made selling what I had. I spent about $1350 on all, and made back a little more than half, selling some of my others. It fits in my budget, therefore i don't feel guilty one bit.

I

 

[iamleiya]

I feel guilty sometimes, not gonna lie. You become aware of things in life in general and sometimes think if spending this about of $$ is worth it. Then, sometimes.. I just dont care. Especially now a days when you just gotta motivate/appreciate yourself so this kind of treat is amazing.

 

[lovingmybags]

Nope, I just got my first full-time job out of school, and while that's good the location's in the middle of nowhere. Even receiving packages is rather inconvenient, so I can't express how glad I am to have everything with me. Having just about all the clothes and accessories I need, I won't have to hop in a car for half an hour just to go to JC Penny's. Not much shopping choices here!

 

[loves]

Not at all.

My first bag was a Gucci and it cost me USD5-600 at that time. I got it with my first paycheck.
Then about 7 years later I got a Chanel WOC and then a Fendi Spy in my early 30s. These purchases were spaced so far apart there was absolutely no guilt.

I only started buying / collecting once my financial situation was stable.
Imagine I was living in Europe with Hermes just a 10 minute walk away but at that time I simply could not justify bags that cost over 1k (this was over 12 years ago and prices were better then but it felt extravagant to me).

Lots of people I know trickle in to Hermes after years of Chanel and LV but I never got into Chanel or LV because i only bought $400-500 bags.

I am pretty much done with Hermes and now am going to explore Chanel

 

[clu13]

Yes I do have guilt. I did not before, when I was younger. I felt like I worked hard and I don’t have kids so why not?

This has been a year of unspeakable tragedy in the world so it is difficult to see such destruction and devastation and be concerned about material possessions. I have not purchased a bag since I went to Paris 11 months ago. I wanted to go a year and it looks like I’ve made it.

I’ve tried to be more charitable this year and focus on travel/experiences. My husband really tried to buy me the Chanel mermaid Gabrielle bag in Hawaii a few weeks ago. I declined. I’m planning a trip for Christmas for us - perhaps Central America for some yoga and hiking. And then Bali for his birthday for some more wellness/reflection.

My Chanel SA did tell me that I should have grabbed that bag because it’s nearly impossible to get. But I feel fine. Of course I would have enjoyed it but I have bags that I never use. I keep telling myself I should sell some bags. I trying to enjoy what I have versus thinking about what I don’t have.

 

[bellebellebelle19]

I just feel like I should save it instead of spending it. I have all my necessities covered, no debt or loans, and a decent amount already in my savings. I'm in my 20s though so there's a lot I could be saving for: wedding, first house, maybe more school…

 

[nicoleflopy]

last weekend we went to the city, and parked at a car park we never went before, because I saw from map its closer to the place I am going. and we are kind of frightenedat what we saw there, a lot of shops closed, we saw homeless people, I guess I saw in total about 10? I feel bad, didn't saw that before. maybe because of economic went down? I went to the city to see handbags… but decided I am good with my currant collection, no more now.

 

[RayKay]

I don't think guilt is the correct sentiment. I am careful about my purchases in that they fit my budget. I like my bags but don't consider it an obsession. I tend to buy a few bags one year, then go several years without adding anymore. This was a year of buying, but the last time I bought a bag before this year was 5+ years ago. I likely will go a long time before buying more as I feel little desire to add more at this point. I even feel okay with concept of never buying another at this point...I am sure I can get what I have to last a few decades!

I am quite conscientious that being able to buy bags is a luxury. That others may not have, that I have myself certainly not always had. I budget for expenses, savings, travel, hobbies, and splurge/luxury. I do not have any consumer debt, nor do I have any student loans left. I also manage my time - work hard, experience/travel, hobbies, volunteer...I try to limit the time I spend thinking about bags and other items and just use them! At the end of the day I am aware they are just material things there to carry my stuff from one place to another. So guilt is not the right word but more awareness that buying a bag means not saving or buying something else, an awareness it is a privilege to be in a situation where I can spend $100, $500, $1,000 etc on something to carry my stuff around in.

The only time I actually feel guilt is if I am not using a bag, as it feels
like clutter and waste, but this is why I keep the number of bags I have manageable and in rotation.