whose daddy's or mommy's princess?

#62
BacardiGirl, bless you. You are such a wonderful daughter!

I cannot remember if the OP stated her age, but she sounds young. With age, and life experience, I believe thought on these things change. OP, I am very happy you have a loving mother, you are very blessed.

In my youth, my mother could never afford any luxury item for herself, let alone me...but she gave me love, which is better than 10 million bags.
 
#63
slidegirlcass said:
I agree!

We were taught to take pride and enjoyment in doing well and being smart. We sometimes received gifts for grades, but it was never definite.

For doing well in elementary school we went to dinner at Sizzler and got to go out to the movies.

For doing well in junior high we got a small trinket or a nicer version of something we already needed like jeans or sneakers.

For doing well in high school our gift was not getting grounded.

For doing well in college our gift was not getting cut off from those tuition payments. We had to work if we wanted spending money.

My parents were rough, overprotective, incredibly strict, and I hated them growing up. All my friends got nice things and allowance including in college and after!

Now I realize that they were and are wonderful in their own way because as a 25 year old single woman who works, I dont expect anything from anyone or feel entitled to things for doing my job and meeting my responsibilities.

Ill take the gifts of a good moral compass, love and affection, and a strong sense of self over a handbag anyday.
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I totally agree!!!

When I have kids, i don't plan to give them any designer bags, at least when they're under 18. If they want them, they can save up their $$$ for them (e.g. from babysitting jobs, part-time work etc). I don't want my kids thinking that getting a designer bag at 14 is the norm, because that's what everyone else is supposedly getting (which i doubt). I don't think they'll learn to appreciate things until they've earned them with their own money.
 
#64
My mom once got me a pair of diamond earrings after a parent-teacher conversation that had gone a lot better than I had expected and she had expected from me. I live in a society where underacheiving is the norm and for various reasons I had done horrible in school the years before that, and what had triggered me to do better was that I had changed to a school that actually had dedicated teachers - I didn't really work harder, but things were just much more interesting.

Anyways, if my parents wants to give me something nice if I do well, then I'm appreciative and grateful about it, if not then it doesn't matter - five years from now, employers are not gonna look at my earrings or purse when I apply for a job, so it's in my own best interest to do as good as possible.


And with that, I'm off to school for eight hours straight of lectures :sweatdrop:
 
#65
fabgrabs said:
BacardiGirl, bless you. You are such a wonderful daughter!

I cannot remember if the OP stated her age, but she sounds young. With age, and life experience, I believe thought on these things change. OP, I am very happy you have a loving mother, you are very blessed.

In my youth, my mother could never afford any luxury item for herself, let alone me...but she gave me love, which is better than 10 million bags.
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SO TRUE!!!!! :tup: :tup:

i always tell people i was spoiled as a child, but spoiled with love instead of money. :smile: I was an only child until age 6 and my mom was a SAHM then so basically she spent all her time with me, going shopping, teaching me how to read, cook, etc. when i went off to kindergarten (at a private school) i remember i was the poorest kid in the class (couldn't afford a box of new crayons, had to get hand-me down crayons from my cousin, lol) however i was the only kid in the class who already knew how to read (because my mom had taught me) and the only kid who could speak three languages (again it was my mom, for getting me French records from the local library, lol).

the same I thing can be said for husbands. My DH may not spoil me with all the expensive bags/gifts as many people's husbands on this forum, but he always spoils me to pieces with love and attention. :love: He only works 40 hours a week and rarely travels and I *love* that, because we get to spend soo much time together, and yeah, to me that is worth more than a million bags, definitely!! :yes:
 
#66
hmmm.... oh my did you guys really get the impression that I get everything I ask for ? and its just about grades and skool ?
And the reason that I love my parents is because they buy me whatever i crave?......I dont think so.

oh and no one is bragging here... I study really hard not for my parents gifts but for my self. I dont have a car, I drive my moms car .. all my friends have cars and i never went running to them and nagging them to get me one..
I respect their rules and my mom is my bestest of friends..

And please..when i said begging ..what is the problem here? You think i go down to my knees and start crying and start pleading? No its just I ask her for something and she says get lost and i tell her think about it and she starts saying when you get a job you better give me half ur paycheck .. and she laughs.. and its not revolved around my grades..its not like they tell me if u get an A ill get u an LV bag! ..

My parents are free to chose what to buy me..and it happens to be a couple of times a luxury item...it all depends on their capability .. my mom asks do you want gold this time or what? she gives me options and i choose.. so when i tell her i want a bag.. and my budget for bags is maximum $700 so u wont find me carrying the LV tribute bag some day for getting a distinction on my graduation...
 
#67
addictedtoJUICY said:
i just got a job at a clothing store. so for everyone that says "oh it's not easy to get a job," you're just being lazy. [\quote]

As a foreign student the government limits the amount of money I'm allowed to make on a regular basis (340€ per month, every job where I could earn more I need not apply) AND (worse) my possible employer needs to ask a state institution whether I can do this job or not (for everything they have to aks) --> this takes up to 2 weeks. (the employers know this, the only time I got hired was when the responsible didn't know about this regulation at all...) The other possibility is 3 months unlimited earnings, but only 3 months per year, and you cannot do this additionally to the first possibility (and as stated, having to ask whether I can do this...). If you still call this easy circumstances to find a job, then do it...

ok, I possibly could easily get jobs Austrians don't want (cleaning toilets...), but I'm simply not willing to do this when I'm not dependant on a job. And I still say: getting a decent job is difficult here
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#68
sarahloveslouis said:
IMHO, parents aren't "wonderful" because they reward you with bags for being responsible in school... Where's the work ethic gone to nowadays??
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Well said, darling, well said.

I feel that I am so much more lucky to have parents who forced me to work for everything I have. I can proudly say that I have busted my arse since the age of 14 to work for every little thing I have including high school tuition and college tuition. It is so much more rewarding to know that everything I have, I got all on my own with anybody's help.

I hate when people say they "got good grades...so mommy bought me this....:hysteric:". Your a freaking adult - you SHOULD get good grades. If you need a reward, provide it to yourself.
 
#71
i knew this thread was gonna be trouble from the start! IMO, you don't learn the value of a dollar if everything is just given to you. i think it's ok to reward kids IF they have EARNED it. otherwise, kids will just grow up expecting that things are just handed to them and will take for granted what has been given to them. again, just MY opinion.
 
#72
I know this is a bag forum but theres so much more I need to teach and instill in my children than designer bags. We are not well off but I still take them to help out the homeless, volunteer their time, and help people. We are blue collar working folks and it teaches them that life is not just about you, its about everyone around you as well.
I am a foster parent and I get children who think its a luxury to take a bath and put on clean clothes, to sleep in a warm bed. I have had children ask me at bathtime if the water would be warm because they had never had a warm bath.
It may sound terrible but I think all children should first be exposed to what they DO have instead of what they dont have and this world would be a much better place.
 
#73
abagforme said:
I know this is a bag forum but theres so much more I need to teach and instill in my children than designer bags. We are not well off but I still take them to help out the homeless, volunteer their time, and help people. We are blue collar working folks and it teaches them that life is not just about you, its about everyone around you as well.
I am a foster parent and I get children who think its a luxury to take a bath and put on clean clothes, to sleep in a warm bed. I have had children ask me at bathtime if the water would be warm because they had never had a warm bath.
It may sound terrible but I think all children should first be exposed to what they DO have instead of what they dont have and this world would be a much better place.
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Once again, very well said and Kudos to you for fostering children AND for taking them to volunteer. Actually, I will be taking my 8 yr old niece to volunteer at Ronald McDonald house this weekend. I hope that she gets as much as I do from experiences like these.
 
#74
I guess i am privileged ... but who said that i dont appreciate or think of others? I'm in college and my parents pay my tuition fees and as i started this thread i said how i get luxury bags as gift from my lovely mom... so that makes me spoilt and think the world is all revolved around me and i dont know the value of money?
I rent a truck and goto the red cross and i dont donate directly to them..i goto them and get numbers of a certain number of families who are not well off...and then my contribution starts. I donate everything from eyeglass frames, food coupons, clothing, crutches, furniture ..anything you can think of. I know the size of each individual from each family..so i would know which clothes that would suit them and i go around my family ask for stuff they dont need or never used and same with friends.
Every end of the month I organize with the help of my older sister to rent a bus and invite people to go visit prisons, the elder home, and abandoned kids in shelters.
I know what goes around in the world..I appreciate what God has blessed with me and I know that I should have a role in the society.
 
#75
^ i don't think anyone is accusing you of not being a good person, and, hey, if they are, it's a internet forum. they don't know you, so who cares? your mother gives you nice things, it makes you happy, and you've stated that you appreciate her for it, and that's good. it sounds like you have a healthy, working relationship with your mother and that's all that matters.

your post sparked a discussion, which resulted in wide array of opinions being stated here. you shouldn't take it personally or believe they are all aimed directly at you. i don't think anyone here is saying that since your parents are willing to lavish you with nice gifts makes you ignorant of real world issues or important values.
 
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