Solitaire diamond ring without engagement

[Juli407]

Hi thrte

I know that you‘ll understand my „problem/thoughts“.

My boyfriend and I, we are a couple since nearly 10 years and have a daughter together.

I don’t know if we‘ll get married one day, it’s not really important for us. (Some days I wish, some days it doesn’t matter.) He‘s not an „old school-character“ in these things, so if we‘ll get married one day maybe, I can’t imagine that I‘ll get a classic wedding proposal with a ring. So that’s the „background“ of my question.

My dad would like to gift me a special ring with a huge value - e.g. a solitaire ring with a larger diamond or something like that.

Do you think these solitaire rings are only engagement rings? Or could you wear such a ring without being engaged? Would everybody think I’m engaged because I wear such a ring?

Yes, I‘m a bit girly and I would like to have a solitaire diamond ring.

And then I think: maybe I’ll get engaged one day and I’ll get a classic wedding proposal and I then already have a solitaire ring…

And I have to decide for one because he wants to let it make from a jeweller.

Please share your thoughts with me ☺️

 

[Winterfell]

Oh I’d take the ring in a heartbeat!

 

[Swanky]

I think it would be look like an e-ring of worn on the ring finger. On the right hand, different finger I doubt people would wonder.

 

[chanellover333]

Is there an option to have earrings made instead lol? But people wear engagement type rings on random fingers all the time, if you like it, go for it.

 

[papertiger]

Buy for now and not what may be. Large coloured stones are an even better investment now if you have a favourite. Perhaps a natural fancy colour and/or fancy cut diamond.

As Swanky said, you can wear it on the other hand and a different finger.

 

[A bottle of Red]

Wear it on the index finger of your other hand

 

[880]

You can always wear it as is on a different finger; reset it into a cocktail setting; or even reimagine it as a solitaire pendant or other piece. Enjoy!

 

[Berengeria]

Agreed. Accept the generous offer from your father and wear it on a different finger other than the traditional "engagement" finger.

You will be able to pass down this gift one day to your children and explain that it was from their grandfather.

I wish I had something to remember my father by. He died years ago and left me nothing but a mess to clean up. Cherish the kindness, success, and generosity of your father by accepting the gift he offers and let it make you feel warm and loved, as I hope you truly are and I'm sure deserve to be.

 

[Misha333]

+1 to buying for now advice! Also, get what you truly want to wear—if or when you receive another ring, you’ll always have the option to repurpose this one into a different piece of jewelry, like a necklace, if you don’t feel like wearing two diamond rings.

 

[JulieKat]

Wear it on the index finger of your other hand

I was thinking forefinger, but agree it shouldn't be the ring finger on the right hand.
I would also stay away from the classic solitaire design and have something that has more presence.

 

[A bottle of Red]

Very

You can always wear it as is on a different finger; reset it into a cocktail setting; or even reimagine it as a solitaire pendant or other piece. Enjoy!

Very good ideas

 

[nicole0612]

I wear my ER on my ring finger on my opposite hand. I stopped wearing it for awhile because my husband was mildly annoying me and I honestly didn’t even think he would notice. I swap around all of my jewelry, so it seemed fine to me. Well, it turns out he did notice and was a little bummed, so I put it back on, but on the opposite hand (it fits that finger better) and now I feel independent and he feels appreciated. I wear cocktail or branded rings on my wedding ring finger. So I think you are totally fine to wear it as jewelry on any finger you like!

 

[A1aGypsy]

I’ll be the lone voice who says - I would get (and treasure) a cocktail ring with a gorgeous coloured stone instead.

I think the symbolism is too entrenched with a diamond being from a partner and you’re going to be forever having to deny the assumption that you got engaged! Or you got married! Or you are married or people will refer to your boyfriend as your husband etc.

Also, and not that it is fair, but I think there will be people who will fall into old stereotypes and assume you got it because you wanted to get / be married. And it would annoy the crap out of me to have to constantly correct that as well.

I have a friend who has a lovely stack of thin bands on her middle finger and she is always fielding comments about how “got it for yourself cuz he wouldn’t get it for you, eh?” Stupid and jerkish and annoying. Plus, your boyfriend will hear about it as well. It just gets really old and tiresome.

I think something like Diana’s aquamarine square ring (although I prefer blue topaz for vibrancy) would be stunning and you wouldn’t have all the rest to deal with.

But JMHO. You should do what makes you feel happiest!

 

[Juli407]

Thank you for your answers ☺️

I fell in love with oval shaped diamond rings long years and I decided to choose one. I‘ll wear it on my middle finger (right hand).
Traditional the engagement rings were on the left ring finger and when you get married one day you can change to the left ring finger with your wedding band (in Germany).
I don’t have it on my left ring finger, on the opposite hand and finger. And if somebody asks: I’ll answer that’s not an engagement ring.

My boyfriend don’t buy jewelry for me 🙄 He says I have enough (do we ever have enough? 😂). And when he‘ll ask me one day I’m sure that he won’t spend a lot of money for a ring. 🤷🏻‍♀️

He always get asked by people why we‘re not married and he doesn’t care.

 

[snibor]

Here in US, engagement rings worn on left hand. My understanding is in some European countries, it’s worn on right hand. I wear my mom’s on my right (the big diamond in it belonged to my father’s mother). The ring means a lot to me so I really don’t care what anyone thinks. I say wear it as you please.