Brand or Unbranded ering? Do I really need one?

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vilette21c

O.G.
Jun 23, 2008
562
862
I'm already married and after a long debate, considered buying an engagement ring. I see most of the spouses of my husband's friends wearing their engagement rings whenever we have socials, and I have to admit getting kinda anxious about questions why I'm not wearing mine. I find myself sometimes lying because I don't want them to think that my husband is cheap (he is far from cheap), and I simply say I don't like wearing it.

The real problem is me I think... I have a lot of jewelry to begin with. I accumulated so much that I became really picky and I didn't want one (I think). I have mixed feelings about it really.

Earlier we went to Tiffany's and were looking at engagement rings. I looked at the Novo's to the classic round cut rings but nothing fancied me. There was one brilliant cut, H color, VVS2 or better (not sure), 1.32 for almost $17k and he could have bought it but I hesitated. I wasn't digging the H color since I know what an E looks like. My mom gave me a heart-shaped E color, VVS2 .85 ring and another round cut G, VVS2 .70 ring. I felt like the H color was unacceptable. I eventually saw an E but it was for $26k but felt like the 1 carat was small. I have 3 carat black onyx jewelry sets and an almost 5 carat ruby ring that came with 1.5 carat earrings from my grandmother which she bought in the 1940s.

It came to the point that my husband was complaining because he thinks that my mother doomed me and my sisters. Honestly, i felt doomed too... he can buy me the more expensive ones ($30k and up) but I think it's too much... it's like buying a car.

So I made a decision in the end, I told him not to give me an engagement ring anymore and said that I think I have too much. I have three jewelry cases full, and I think it's excessive.

So my questions are: If I do decide to buy a ring, would it really matter if it's branded or not? And second, should I even buy one considering I have a lot? I am so confused...Please help.:confused1:
 
I can understand wanting one, even though you have a lot of jewellery already. An E ring is a different piece to what you have.

However saying that it is really the commitment between you and your DH - not what others think as to why/why not, you have/have not a E ring.

I think you should stay away from the "branded" rings. Find a local jeweller you trust and work with them. They will probably be able to find you a diamond to your specs in the budget you are happy with. I personally think that warm coloured diamonds look nicer on some people. It is down to personal choice.

No one will never know how much it cost or where it came from unless you tell them. (surely no-one would ask as I think thats very rude).

I hope you find something both you and your DH love.
 
$26k for 1ct is a LOT even with those specs. I would not pay that no matter what fancy brand name is on the ring. You'd have to be a fool to pay that much, IM(Professional) opinion.

I'm not really one for branding in wedding/engagement jewelry. There are many reasons I can argue against it but the most important one is this:

A diamond is a diamond is a diamond no matter where it is sold.

Two rocks with identical specs are worth the same, even if one carried a fancy name and the other was just some no-name deal at a trade show or a small independant dealer. Honestly, when you're buying engagement jewelry at a luxury house you're paying a good 15-20% name tax. That's just what I call it....granted a big name carries prestige and adds somewhat to resale value but that's it. To some people, the name is everything and that's ok. If having the Tiffany ring to show off is what matters, then don't settle. But if having a great DIAMOND for a great price is what matters, the big houses aren't such a good bet.

No matter what you're after (specific diamond size, specific price point etc) you'll get the most for your money from an local jeweler. You can also have something unique and created specifically for you, not sold out of a case by the hundreds.

Lastly, I don't think a diamond engagement ring is the end all be all of jewelry. That comes off as hypocritical considering I have two and they're large but that's just ME. Some people prefer different stones, some prefer to wear a necklace. There are no rules at all. You should have one because you love it, not because you want to avoid looking cheap. You'll never truly cherish a piece of jewelry if you got it to impress anyone else.

I hope you think on it and come up with the right answer for you.
 
I'd say dont even think about the brands........find something you love...the best quality you can afford.......let it speak to you.....you can get twice the diamond for the same money from a reputable dealer.......and if you dont want one at all.......or need one...thats OK too!!........sounds like you have Fab stuff to wear!!!!. ;);)
 
I go back and forth on engagement rings. I have never had an engagement ring, but sometimes I feel like I want one. Our 20 year anniversary is this December and DH has stated that he will get one if I want it. I am leaning more towards an anniversary band to go with my wedding ring instead.

I wouldn't go with a big name designer if you are looking for a good sized stone. There is such a mark-up. You might want to check out Pricescope. com; there is a lot of info & pictures of rings there.
 
^ An eternity band is a great option if you are ambivalent about an e-ring!

Personally, I would choose an unbranded ring, for financial reasons. I know some of the brands assure you very good quality, but I just think the prices these days have gotten out of hand.
 
If you've already have lots of jewellry and not keen on getting a ring, get a nice Hermes or Chanel bag instead :graucho:

If you decide to get a ring - don't bother with the branded types. From what I hear, they're not worth the price tag

Good luck deciding and let us know what you end up getting
 
I would go with an un-branded ring from a reputable jeweler that will offer a warranty for the piece, such as if the stone fall out etc.

Then get it insured! That pretty much covers you for everything that a brand-name engagement ring would come with.

I don't know what to tell you regarding the engagement ring. DH and I have been married for 2 and a half years and we're in the process of upgrading my ring.
So I obviously like engagement rings, lol.

But I also love the idea of a "thick" eternity band that makes a statement as well!
 
I feel the same as Gnome. This has come up so many times here - branded vs. non. Unless you are going to wear a sign saying my ring is tiffany's, etc. or tell everyone I can't see any reason to overpay. It sounds like you have some great jewelry that you love and having a traditional ER ring is not of great importance. As for your friends thinking your husband is cheap - I wouldn't give it a second thought. You know it isn't true and if friends define you by the jewelry you wear then that is a whole different issue.
 
whether you want a ring really is up to you, if you love the pieces that you have from your mother and grandmother, you could always wear those and call that your engagement ring and it has sentimental value. as for branded or unbranded, i would go unbranded, you get more stone for the money, i personally don't think it's worth an extra ~$10,000 or more just to say your ring is from tiffany or cartier
 
I have the same dilemma as the OP.

I asked my DH not to get me an engagement ring because I doubted that I would wear it. My DH is not cheap, on the contrary, he is generous. Design speaks a lot to him and he doesn't care for most E ring settings. I have a wedding band from Niessing and I absolutely love it. It's like a piece of modern architecture on your finger.

I've been asked several times why I do not have an E ring. I've looked at Tiffany, Cartier, all the big names and also non-branded rings. I honestly do not care for the idea although I've admired beautiful rocks on my friends.

Don't get me wrong. I love jewelery. I've received and bought some amazing pieces myself but just can't bring myself to buy that 1 E ring. LOL.

I also do not care much for the branded jewelery. If the design speaks to me, I'll buy it.

:smile1:
 
I would choose unbranded every time, but it's a really personal choice.

Have you considered something more unique and unconventional? Like an antique diamond, colored diamond or really high quality gemstone engagement ring? For example, I ADORE large antique diamonds in very low colors, 3+ carats in K/L/M/N colors. To my eye, nothing is prettier than a low colored antique cut. I wear mine as an e-ring with my wedding band, and no one else has anything like it. I constantly get people who say, "wow, I love that diamond, what a pretty color" and then I say, "thanks, it's an 'M' - a low color, that's what makes it look so different" and they always respond with "oh, so it's a bad quality then?" with a puzzled look on their face because they have been conditioned to think that low color can't be beautiful, yet their eyes tell them it is.

LOL, I love the way people react to unconventional stones :)

Anyway, my point is that perhaps you are left unsatisfied by more conventional options because you have been collecting for awhile and need something really unique to satisfy you as an e-ring?

(Pssst, for $20k you can get a 4+ carat antique cushion cut diamond, M, VS...lol, wait, this is about what YOU would do, not what I'D do...)
 
Like EricaD, I am a big fan old antique diamonds. My absoluet favorite diamond ring is a 1.10ct old Rose Cut. I actually foegt the specs at the moment but it's definately not even face-up white. It's just gorgeous, especially in the Edwardian platinum engraved band.

I like it much better than I do my original e-ring, which is a high color, high clarity 4ct.

And I really do agree with linpiddy, let the ring speak to you. If you love it, you'll know it. If you don't, you'll never wear it.
 
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