You may try washing your hair less frequently, that should help some, and one of the best treatments for hair I've found is plain old olive oil. Massage a bit through your wet hair (no need to really douse it) and then put on a shower cap and let it sit for a bit. Then rinse it out gently. You'll have a little bit of the smell of the olive oil remain but it does refresh your hair.
Have you ladies also tried getting a boar bristle brush and just brushing your hair for a good half hour or so? That will really move the natural oils through your hair. I have seriously dry skin and have trouble with a dry scalp sometimes too, so I try to really brush my hair at least once a week.