RE-GIFTING... rude?

[coco]

[coco]

LVoe
O.G.
Nov 4, 2007
5,438
64
#1
Ok so there is this woman I have worked with for 4 years now and I swear in all that time she has never given me a new (like she bought it herself) gift. For example, last year for my birthday she gave me a gift and for the first time I thought "wow!! this time she really made an effort!!"... and on a closer inspection I saw her name engraved on the back, then some elses, then the year 1995!!!! This has really annoyed me in the past - but I was really quite offended the other day when she gave a substantial gift to a close colleague of mine that I remember someone giving to her last year. Everyone was talking about how stunning it was and I, without thinking first, came out with ..."I swear I have seen that before...." she quickly turned around and walked away. Now I love this woman to bits... maybe I am being harsh... but is this "re-gifting" common practice????????

Now my attitude concerning regifting is that it is nasty and thoughtless. I would rather receive nothing or at least a simple card than junk some one else does not want.

Am i being ungrateful?

Thoughts? Opinions?
 
#2
No [coco] I dont think you are being ungrateful.

Part of the thrill of receiving a gift is the thought that someone put the time, effort & thought into selecting a gift for you. To re-gift is a sign that they really couldn't be bothered and it also means that they really didn't think much of the gift in the first place and were obviously ungrateful themselves.

They should donate the item to Charity if they don't want it.
 
#4
i agree with both of you - i saw a thing on Oprah about it once and apparently it is common.... it my culture (italian heritage) it is just unheard of.... Apparently this is common practice with unwated engagement / house warming / wedding gifts....

Obviously my colleague would never admit to it.......... it's like a dirty little secret!!

The other side of this is when I give her a gift I always think "will she just give this to someone else????" Even if I gave her a box of chocolates as a gesture I feel she might pass it on!! Weird...

These are my thoughts with christmas approaching and her being on my gift list.
 
#5
I generally don't regift, and I agree that gift giving should have thought behind it. But I think if I ever do get a very nice gift that just isn't for me, but I know someone else would love and get way more use out of it, I think that's an acceptable situation to re-gift.
 
#6
I think it depends on the gift. Obviously if it's something with personal engraving or initials or anything like that I think that is just beyond rude & classless.

But say you were given a very beautiful waterford crystal vase - great, but you have 4 similar waterford vases already, 1-2 of which aren't even being used. In this case if it were still in all it's original packaging & never used I would regift it to someone I knew would want & use it & not feel guilty doing so in the least.
 
#7
IF I regifted, I would just STATE outright and include something a little extra. I think regifting is only to be done with close friends. My note would say, "Hi Carrie, I received this sweater but I think it'd actually be sublime on you! Let's go out to dinner soon so I can see you in it..." and I would include a modest gift-card to a restaurant ($40 or so).

If someone did this for me, I would find nothing wrong with it, assuming they are a good friend. I do the same.
 
#8
kbell said:
I think it depends on the gift. Obviously if it's something with personal engraving or initials or anything like that I think that is just beyond rude & classless.

But say you were given a very beautiful waterford crystal vase - great, but you have 4 similar waterford vases already, 1-2 of which aren't even being used. In this case if it were still in all it's original packaging & never used I would regift it to someone I knew would want & use it & not feel guilty doing so in the least.
Click to expand...

Agreed! I feel the same way. :yes:
 
#9
kbell said:
I think it depends on the gift. Obviously if it's something with personal engraving or initials or anything like that I think that is just beyond rude & classless.

But say you were given a very beautiful waterford crystal vase - great, but you have 4 similar waterford vases already, 1-2 of which aren't even being used. In this case if it were still in all it's original packaging & never used I would regift it to someone I knew would want & use it & not feel guilty doing so in the least.
Click to expand...

I agree. I see nothing wrong with re-gifting as long as some thought was put into it. If I receive something nice that I just don't need or won't use and I know that it is just the right thing for someone else, I will give it away. Usually along with something else I bought for them.
 
#10
re-gifting is rude, tacky and classless

one of my friends years ago got me a cute shirt set from the GAP and my other friends cute clothes. well not only was the inside to big for me because it was stretched, but the clothes smelt like Tide!! We all gathered that the clothes were "used"

what an insult!! i give the set to a thrift shop. You dont give someone your handme downs and then pass if off like its brand new.:throwup:
 
#12
what is ruder, regifting a nice item or giving someone a gift you bought off a clearance rack with holes in it and no store gift receipt because it was final sale?

yes, I have been given a holed sweater from the clearance rack.... :wacko:
 
#13
I think re-gifting is rude, it shows the giver that you didn't appreciate their gift, and the recipient that you didn't care to put any effort into picking out something for them. If the item is engraved with someone's name, that is a complete faux pas in my book. If it's an expensive item that you already have and it cannot be returned, plus you know for certain that the recipient wants one, I guess it's ok.
 
#14
kbell said:
I think it depends on the gift. Obviously if it's something with personal engraving or initials or anything like that I think that is just beyond rude & classless.

But say you were given a very beautiful waterford crystal vase - great, but you have 4 similar waterford vases already, 1-2 of which aren't even being used. In this case if it were still in all it's original packaging & never used I would regift it to someone I knew would want & use it & not feel guilty doing so in the least.
Click to expand...

Well said.

I think re-gifting is perfectly fine as long as you dont give it back to the person who gave it to you. :nogood:
 
#15
I agree with you all, I think re-gifting is ok as long as the person wants the item but to send them used/unwanted/engraved items in class-less, shame on them !.
 
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