A possible wedding disaster...

gr8heart

gr8heart

-for YSL!
May 23, 2006
3,881
1
#1
Help! I really need your opinion, because I know very little about weddings.

My younger sister is getting married in July 2008 :yahoo:.
BUT, she is having her wedding 2.5 hours away from the city (Minneapolis) in a cabin by a lake, 18 miles from the largest town and about 10+ miles away from a casino. She is about to rent a cabin able to accomodate about 10 people and expects immediate family members to stay in the cabin for at least 3 days (before, during and a bit after the wedding.)

I may be overreacting, but I am worried that people may not come.:sad: She attended college out east after graduating from high school in south Texas. She lived in D.C. and in NJersey after college, so most of the guests invited are from out of town and used to city life.

I have told her to really think about it and even spoke to a couple of wedding planners on her behalf. They said, NO! Too much stress and unnecessary problems may arise. I feel so bad, because I really want her day to be special.

Would you attend a wedding in the midwest, rent a car, drive somewhere in the northwoods of Minnesota for the wedding and after, drive 10-20 miles to stay at a motel or casino?
 
#2
Where is she going to stay? Wedding night? How is she going to have her hair/make-up done, get dressed etc.? Does she expect immediate family to have their hair/make-up done? Why does immediate family need to stay in the cabin and not at the hotel? Is it a woodsy cabin or a house used as a "cabin"- does it have electricity, plumbing etc.? Lots of answers she needs to get before she pays the deposit.

As far as attendance, yes she can expect that there will be people that decline. However, people decline no matter the location. Perhaps there will be more because of the need to rent hotel and the drive the distance (I personally wouldn't do it unless it was someone very close). If that is a concern, she may wish to change the location to a nice park in the city.
 
#4
If I was very very close to the bride, I would go anywhere to be there for her special day, If I was invited but not super friends with them, I wouldn't ever bother going to be honest.
 
#6
shiba said:
Where is she going to stay? Wedding night? How is she going to have her hair/make-up done, get dressed etc.? Does she expect immediate family to have their hair/make-up done? Why does immediate family need to stay in the cabin and not at the hotel? Is it a woodsy cabin or a house used as a "cabin"- does it have electricity, plumbing etc.? Lots of answers she needs to get before she pays the deposit.

As far as attendance, yes she can expect that there will be people that decline. However, people decline no matter the location. Perhaps there will be more because of the need to rent hotel and the drive the distance (I personally wouldn't do it unless it was someone very close). If that is a concern, she may wish to change the location to a nice park in the city.
Click to expand...

She plans to stay at the cabin that is like a home (lots of 'cabins' here are like 2nd homes) WITH immediate family members. She wants my mom, etc. coming from TX to stay with his family coming from another country on the first floor, while she stays on the 2nd floor. She mentioned that people who cannot find a hotel room or a place to stay can camp! *sigh*

She is planning to have a short ceremony outside and I imagine she will get ready there.:sad: I have encouraged her to look into area parks (there are lots to choose from) but for some reason, she is set on this cabin and is planning on giving a deposit very soon.:crybaby:

Thanks ladies for your responses. I really appreciate your insights.
 
#7
We got married in cute little chapel in Yosemite. Had only immediate family members come so around 10 people as well. We put everyone up at the Ahwahnee Hotel. If we had put them in a cabin, they would have murdered each other.
 
#8
bagnshoofetish said:
We got married in cute little chapel in Yosemite. Had only immediate family members come so around 10 people as well. We put everyone up at the Ahwahnee Hotel. If we had put them in a cabin, they would have murdered each other.
Click to expand...

Oh Shoo!

You made me laugh so hard, my cat Betty is just looking at me funny!

I mean it's so true that having family members from the bride's side and the groom's side, together in one tiny place with no place to go... is a disaster waiting to happen. :Push:

I like how you put everyone up in a hotel...if I cannot change her mind (which NO one ever can) I will push and try my hardest to make her reserve rooms close by the cabin. The thing is that summer is a busy place in the Northwoods...

Was your wedding during a busy season at Yosemite, Shoo?
 
#9
Gr8:heart: How's it going?

Anyway, I gave you my opinion on the whole wedding situation as far a friends are concerned and the family members who actually show up for the wedding will most likely enjoy celebrating the wedding, but if it is anything like my family, there may end up being a divorce as a result of the sleeping arrangements.:Push:
 
#10
Well... It wouldn't be my first choice of venue..... What she should do is make arrangements with one of the nearest hotels to get good rates on lodging for the guests, and to provide bus transportation to and from the wedding. That way nobody has to worry about getting lost, or drinking and driving.
 
#11
bagnshoofetish said:
We got married in cute little chapel in Yosemite. Had only immediate family members come so around 10 people as well. We put everyone up at the Ahwahnee Hotel. If we had put them in a cabin, they would have murdered each other.
Click to expand...

Indeedy! If that had happened to me there WOULD have been murder. My husband's mom wasn't TALKING to my mom because she thought that her son had made a bad decision...
 
#12
gr8heart said:
Oh Shoo!

You made me laugh so hard, my cat Betty is just looking at me funny!

I mean it's so true that having family members from the bride's side and the groom's side, together in one tiny place with no place to go... is a disaster waiting to happen. :Push:

I like how you put everyone up in a hotel...if I cannot change her mind (which NO one ever can) I will push and try my hardest to make her reserve rooms close by the cabin. The thing is that summer is a busy place in the Northwoods...

Was your wedding during a busy season at Yosemite, Shoo?
Click to expand...

yeah if it were an overnight thing, I think people would get along but THREE DAYS??? Thats pushing it for sure. We were married in December so it was kinda busy but probably not like summertime. There was only one other wedding besides ours and Yosemite is a big place so there was plenty of room.
Heres the little chapel we got married in the morning after...
yosemite church.jpg
 
#13
^^^OMG, it looks like a beautiful painting! The chapel is so cute and heavenly. It seems like it's floating in the clouds!

I worry about my sisters decision...she's not even an outdoor person...she hates bugs, the dark, and is especially afraid of wildlife (deer, geese, even pigeons.) The whole idea sounds outrageous...and difficult to pull off...

Remember that 'Why are women so hateful towards other women?' thread? I feel like she is getting this kind of 'mean' encouragement from her friends.

If your good friend told you about having an outdoor wedding like she is planning, would you support her and encourage her?

She's getting this advice from a few good friends who live in NYC and in NJ. She talks to them more about her wedding than she does with me :sad:(I suppose I am like her 2nd mother, so she tends to avoid us until it's absolutely necessary to ask for help or advice and we bail her out.)

As you can see, I'm the worry wart of the family...
 
#15
robynbenz said:
Gr8:heart: How's it going?

Anyway, I gave you my opinion on the whole wedding situation as far a friends are concerned and the family members who actually show up for the wedding will most likely enjoy celebrating the wedding, but if it is anything like my family, there may end up being a divorce as a result of the sleeping arrangements.:Push:
Click to expand...

Robyn! :yahoo:

It's going Ok, just worried about my sis, since the downpayment for the cabin may go out very soon. :crybaby:
I completely remember your suggestion on where to spend the night and BF and I agree. I just feel that at the very last minute, she will need help and I will have to be there while SO enjoys the resort.:sad:

Do you still think about the Fendi spy like I do? :rolleyes:
We'll have to chat later! :smile:
 
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