Your opinion on True Love and Eternal Happiness

  1. Hi Ladies,

    I am really curious to hear your opinions on true love and the possibility to be with one person forever as that has been a topic I have been discussing with my girlfriends a lot lately.
    It has mainly become an issue as a lot of our parents and married friends have either gone through (very) rough stages (cheating etc.) and decided to give it another try or gotten divorced.
    Due to that many of my girlfriends don't believe in the concept of true love anymore or just accept that they won't be with one person forever.

    Do you think it is possible to remain happy, faithful and fulfilled with one person your whole life?

    If so: What do you believe to be the key to this?

    Looking forward to hearing your opinions, ladies!:yes:
  2. I do think it is possible. My grandparents have been together for over 50 years. Four kids. Running two businesses together.

    I think it's partly generational - you just didn't go get divorced when the going got tough.

    People are going to get tired of each other. Being married isn't about having that super happy, head in the sky feeling all the time. I get so sick of my husband sometimes I just want to smack him. But I do love him and I know this even when I don't FEEL in love with him. It's about more than emotion. It's about commitment. I made a decision, a contract if you will, to be with this man for the rest of my life in the good and the BAD.

    This doesn't mean that we'll be happy 100% of the time - everyone has off times. And it isn't his job to make me fulfilled 100% of the time either. We both have to be confident in ourselves - not to expect another person to make you 'whole'.

    Basically, it's like anything in life. You get out of it what you put into it. My husband and I work hard - we both went into this marriage with our eyes open. Yes we are in love and there are times when I do feel head in the clouds in love...but that feeling always fades (even if it resurfaces now and then). It has to be deeper than that - commitment is a dirty word to some people but it's necessary.

    I think if more people realized that marriage isn't all about birds chirping and children laughing - it's HARD work - if more people realized this there would be fewer divorces (although it's truly a myth that the divorce rate is 50% - it's more like 28-29% based on statistics).

    And I will also say that not everyone should stay married - if your husband (or wife for that matter) beats you and is a physical or psychological threat it's time to get out. You can only work so hard if someone else is working to damage you.
  3. i totally agree ^^^ my parents have been married 27yrs and my grandparents 57yrs, true love lives on :biggrin:
  4. I think the key to true love is if i can accept his f*ck ups and if he can accept mine :flowers: That's what it comes down to!!!
  5. Ditto to everything CastoCreations said.
  6. I was very privileged to know all 4 of my grandparents growing up (and I have one left!). They were married 53 years and 65 years, respectively. My folks have been married 42 years. Wars, cancer, kids, grandkids, job loss, good times, bad times, they've been through it all.

    I do think it's possible to find one's soul mate and live a blissful life together. But I don't believe there's just ONE person out there who's right for us.

    Knowing yourself, keeping an open heart and mind, being willing to work on the things you need to improve on, honesty, trust, love and putting the relationship first above all other priorities...all of these things are key ingredients to making it work! Also, not rushing into a marriage. I do have a friend who married her DH after just 6 weeks dating and they're still just as in love 15 years later as before, but that's rare IMO.
  7. I believe in true love 100%
    you just have to believe in it and you will find it.
    I've been married for 8+ years to my husband and no matter what has happened we are inseperable. I trust him and he trusts me.
    there are times when we had problems that any other guy would have left me
    but he stood by me and held my hand through it all.
    he truely is my knight :smile: I honestly don't know what I'd do without him!
    He's a wonderful father, and being parents just brought us even closer to each other.
    he is my true soul mate .
    My parents have been married for 40ish years and they love each other madly. I believe in true love.

    it just depends on your luck too. if you find your soulmate now or maybe after a few more years.
    when you meet him/her you'll know it for sure :smile:
    You just have to keep your eyes open because he/she might be right under your nose without you knowing it ^^
  8. One must love and be happy with themselves... in order to find love and happiness elsewhere.. who the heck wrote that? I buy it:yes:
  9. I do think true love, soul mates, whatever you want to call it, does exist....but it takes work.

    I think today too much emphasis is placed on the the courtship and wedding, but not the marriage. I call it the Cinderella syndrome...girls dream of this fairytale prince and wedding, and they think there is automatically a happily ever after attached.

    Marriage is hard work, compromise, commitment. My husband and had a rough courtship and hard first couple of would have been easier to quit at time than stick it out...but something made us stick it out...true love, soul mates...something....Sunday is our 14th anniversary and I couldn't be happier or more in love.
  10. My parents have been together for 45 years. They genuinely love and respect each other. They are both unselfish, giving people. They are the best of friends! I don't remember hearing fights while I was growing up, only the occasional discussion (and not even loud discussions at that!). They were (and still are) awesome role models. My husband and I have been together for 14 years, and I absolutely adore him and I know he feels the same about me. Our friends think we're the ultimate couple and, by gosh, we are! :smile:
  11. I do believe in true love and a soul mate. My hubby and I have been together for over 10 years. The first year of marriage was a tough one, it's been happiness since (over 7 years married). Commitment, love, and kindness I think are the key. It's easy to quit and harder to keep going when life gets tough. Being kind to one another is essential, when your happy or fighting. DH and I both come from divorced homes and talked about that before we were married, not repeating what we learned from our parents. I'm so much more in love w/ him now than when we got married.
  12. Oh, yes, I am a firm believer in it, go ahead and call me a hopeless romantic, but several people have already mentioned examples in their own families, and there are millions more where those came from.

    And since I married a **Living Saint, it is easy for me to live that dream. :smile:

    My personal opinion is that chances are improved if you marry later as opposed to earlier. When I was 20, I was still learning who *I* was, I could not have said who I would be, much less with whom I would want to be in 30, 50, 60 years!

    **He shared a bathroom with me for a whole year, and married me anyway.
  13. I completely and totally am a believer. My parents knew each other less than a month before they were engaged- dated 2 weeks before they were engaged. They are still together and so happy. It makes it easier to believe because my parents are living it.

    But I think many people forget that love takes work, compromise, fights, meeting in the middle, patience, and understanding- EVERYDAY. It is not easy, but to me, it is worth it.
  14. I think the true secret to being happy with a relationship is being happy with yourself. If you expect another person to make you happy and feel fulfilled, you are bound to be disappointed eventually. No relationship is perfect.

    The other secret I think is to...not lower your expectations exactly, but to figure out what's really important to you in a mate, and what things you are willing to let slide. I know several women (all younger than me) who are looking for Mr Pefect---good-looking, good job (translation: $$$), nice car, nice house, likes dogs instead of cats or sounds a little boring to me.
  15. I was lucky to grow up seeing my parents TOTALLY in love! They were married for 40 years (my dad died of cancer about 8 years ago), and never fought (I asked my mom when I went back for dad's funeral, because I'd never seen them fight, and she said they only ever disagreed on anything twice, but worked it out in less than 10 minutes!). And, I am doubly lucky to have found my love! We moved in together after 2 days, he proposed after less than a week (even though I had two little girls from previous partners - he took them on and helped raise them - no qualms!). Every day, I am more and more in love with him! And every day, I am so thankful to have him in my life!