Workout time = me time = guilt! Other moms?

  1. I ordered a treadmill and I am very excited! I usually run where I live, but I feel guilty for leaving the house and being away from the kids. I work all day, so I tend to think that when I am away from work I should spend as much time as possible with the kids. I ordered the treadmill so that I could still work out, but would not have to leave the kids.

    This got me thinking, and I was wondering if any other moms feel guilty for having some "me" time? I know that when I do some things for myself, I feel better, and am a better mom. Still, I do get a twinge of guilt for doing things for myself sometimes. Anyone else?
  2. Sometimes I beat myself up when I spend too much time on the PF, or when I'm just giving myself "me" time when I have school, work, and family responsibilities. But then I realize that in order to have a balanced life, you have to balance work, play, and restoration. Restoration is a part of working out, and without that time to restore yourself, to help YOU, then you can't possibly be able to truly engage and function in your other tasks. You have to help yourself before you can help others. It is okay to spend time for YOU. It is not about being selfish, and I feel that in today's modern society, females have to sacrifice so much for others, regardless of their own needs. And the fact that we have internalized the idea that it is selfish to do something for ourselves is just another indicator of how strong societal values are regarding female roles. I encourage you to take ur time to work out, feel great, and be the best mother and worker. Your children would not want you to burn out. Consider it a long Mother's Day gift to yourself =)
  3. We moms never get enough time for ourselves anyway, so don't feel guilty for taking care of yourself! I walk and run in the backyard with my 2 year old to get some exercise.
  4. I would feel so guilty if i would even go out one night of the week with my own sister because i would think that my parents or family was talking about how i'm probably an irresponsible mother for not being with my kids when i'm at work. but you know what? if i'm at work all day every day and expected to be just with the kids then where do I come in? My kids deserve a happy mom and not spending anytime to myself would not make me very happy! :smile:
  5. I understand how you feel. It is important to get away and have some alone time. It does every Mom good. I go to the gym between working and writing papers, along side my kid's schools and activities. It has so many benefits that you shouldn't feel guilty!
  6. I know this was more for moms, but i wanted to put an opinion on this, i think you did good on buyin a threadmill if you were feeling like this, i know that work its very absorbing as ive passed it with my mom but i understood in a way, but just do what makes you feel better, having YOUR time doesnt make u a bad person, my sister schedules her things for it not to be mixed up with the kids time and all that or plans a weekend time for kids on her saturdays free time.
  7. I work from home and my 5 year old is with me 24/7 so no I don't feel guilty about having me time. I don't think you should. Sometimes you just have to get away.
  8. T, I completely understand how you feel! I used to feel so guilty about anytime that I spent on myself. But I've come to the realization that everyone needs to "give" something to themselves in order to be happy. I am a better mom to my kids when I get some "me" time. I would feel miserable if I spent all my time doing "mommy" things - even though that is what we all think we should be doing.

    I know you are NOT the type of mom to work all, ignore the kids at night, and then go out on the town.

    Think of it as balance!
  9. It's normal to feel that way, but for your emotional health, you do need a little time to yourself. In the long run, I felt that it made me a better mother because I was doing something that was improving my health and setting an example. Enjoy your workout!!!

  10. I don't have children yet but this is exactly the attitude I plan to have when I do. Exercising keeps me sane, keeps me happy and feeling alive and satisfied with myself. Feeling that way about myself can't possibly hurt my mothering or my children, it's only going to help.
  11. I'm not a mom yet either, but I think many, many women feel guilty for making "me" time. There are so many other demands on our time that it's tough to fit in the things that aren't essential for daily living. Whether it's the gym, some retail therapy, reading a good book or just a plain old bubble bath, my feeling is that it's important to schedule time to just be.
  12. Don't feel guilty about 'me' time especially if you are using that time to workout. As a child of an overweight and very seditary mother I would much rather slightly less time with her if she would use that time to look after herself.
  13. Very well said miani!
  14. #14 Jul 2, 2008
    Last edited: Jul 2, 2008
    Exercise is my therapy and I'd go crazy if I didn't have 2 hours/day or so to work out... I don't feel guilty at all! My twins are better off having a (relatively) sane mommy.

    ETA I do, however, have a gym in my house (complete w/treadmill, elliptical, free weights and some machines) so I definitely second the idea of putting together some kind of a gym in your house if only because it saves you the time of going to/coming from the gym and gives you more time to actually work out while your baby is nearby. That said, I sometimes actually want to work-out away from my house and that's when I go running up a hiking trail close to my home.
  15. I used to feel guilty about it but I have come to realize that I have more energy and more patience after working out so it really benefits my kids for me to have that time for myself.