Why do some people do this?!

#61
Having read all the posts I believe the differences in opinion is a USA - Europe divide. Over here in the UK and in alot of the med countries it is perfectly normal for a stranger to admire a child touch their cheek etc and compliment the mother.

I totally agree that alot of today's allergies etc are a direct association that we have become too fanatical in spraying everywhere with bleach based products and we don't give ourselves the opportunity to build a decent immune system.

UK ladies remember playing out in the fields/parks climbing trees, skipping, hanging upside down on the climbing frame, digging around the ponds and streams and then going home for food and stuffing a buttie down your neck without pausing for breath or washing your hands properly.

I can't remember the last time I was poorly I definately have not had a cold this winter and can't remember having one last winter either. I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact according to my Mother I used to play in the back garden as a child and eat mud!
 
#62
But really, it doesn't really bother me I guess. Only when a creepy person comes around my child, then I pull them closer to me. My SA's have always touched my kids hands, face and head. I have a huge family and they too touch my kids hands and face. Guess it's a cultural thing since we always say hello and goodbye with a kiss on the cheek and a hug. The germ this is not an issue. My younger cousin was always sick. My Aunt wouldn't let anyone near her and always stayed indoors. My 5 year old has put almost everything in her mouth and has only had a minor cold that doesn't last more than a day. Guess everyone's different. I don't go around touching stragers kids but I don't freak out if they're being friendly to mine. Just as long as I don't feel you have bad intentions.
 
#63
RiffRaff --

Absolutely! It's been well documented that children exposed to allergens and various types of germs build up a better immune system and are less sickly as adults.

I think ppl in the US have gone a bit overboard with germphobia. Yes, little critters abound everywhere on our hands from regular contact. But here's a fact: 99.98% of that is harmless to your system, given the proper buildup of immune system. Purell all you want -- you're getting rid of mostly harmless things, and only a portion of the harmful things are killed by it. Can you say bottleneck of superspecies?

My wonderful mentor and rather well respected and reknowned ecology professor said something that stuck with me. When someone on the grad team offered him Purell after a dig in the dirt for fieldwork, he refused, saying, "Why? You always have germs on your hand. Killing some of them will only make it more inviting for the nastier germs that feed off of THEM. I'm not inviting THOSE to my party." :roflmfao:

Seems to me there's a correlation btwn kids being sicklier these days and our germophobe attitude. Well, that and the hours and hours spent in front of the tube, Big Mac in hand. :shrugs:
 
#64
DlkinVegas said:
I dont know how old your child is but attach one of these http://www.mytinyhands.com/ along with a keychain hand sanitizer to his carrier, carseat, stroller etc...
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That is a great idea! Over the years, I have noticed that people, myself included, are generally very wary of touching children. People will even see a child fall off his bike and ask if he is OK and where is your mom, I will go get her, from a respectful distance, teachers and others who work with children must resist the impulse to hug, even pat them.

But I think this is more a US thing, a response to growing awareness of sexual abuse of children, so no one wants there to be any question, and as a result, kids today do miss out on a lot of affectionate expressions from non-related adults.

So maybe the presence of the parent makes them feel safe somehow, and they are petting not only your child, but all the children that they dared not pet.

Also people from different cultural traditions have different customs about this, some don't touch other peoples' babies much at all, and others, especially rural people, are liable to pick it up and carry it off to show it to somebody, especially if it is maybe a blonde baby in a very brunette culture, or if it has red hair, etc.

Whatever the various factors, people are just not thinking about the germs. No one who pets your baby would want it to get sick, so the little hand sanitizer thing is a nice way to remind them, and can also be a conversation starter!
 
#65
I understand bchleo when it comes to unwanted touching - but not on the germ basis (I am wholeheartedly European ;). I don't agree that we are too paranoid, at least here we should be more paranoid - sorry but so many children disappear nowadays that to me it is just negligent to not be worried. hey, the paedophile round the corner is most likely trying to befriend a child in the beginning (sorry for the extreme example, but being friendly when it comes to children is not on for me). I understand that when a child is in distress and might be lost etc it is important someone should help but I am still rather wary than give the benefit of the doubt when it comes to my baby.

as for germs: I don't believe in disinfection in your 'normal' living situation - my baby is all day in the garden, what would i want to disinfect anyway? health organisations are obviously a different matter. in my experience kids get mostly sick when being around other kids that have a cold or a virus etc. and how could I prevent that? (trying to as long as possible - no 'baby' care if I can avoid it).
 
#66
ShimmaPuff said:
That is a great idea! Over the years, I have noticed that people, myself included, are generally very wary of touching children. People will even see a child fall off his bike and ask if he is OK and where is your mom, I will go get her, from a respectful distance, teachers and others who work with children must resist the impulse to hug, even pat them.

But I think this is more a US thing, a response to growing awareness of sexual abuse of children, so no one wants there to be any question, and as a result, kids today do miss out on a lot of affectionate expressions from non-related adults.

So maybe the presence of the parent makes them feel safe somehow, and they are petting not only your child, but all the children that they dared not pet.

Also people from different cultural traditions have different customs about this, some don't touch other peoples' babies much at all, and others, especially rural people, are liable to pick it up and carry it off to show it to somebody, especially if it is maybe a blonde baby in a very brunette culture, or if it has red hair, etc.

Whatever the various factors, people are just not thinking about the germs. No one who pets your baby would want it to get sick, so the little hand sanitizer thing is a nice way to remind them, and can also be a conversation starter!
Click to expand...

The sign is good to have just to get people to think before they act. 99% of the time when people see my sign they wont touch my daughter but they still talk & smile at her which is perfectly fine she loves the attention. As for germs a child's immune system especially under 1 is not as strong as an adults. For a mom with a preemie or child with a compromised immune system for whatever reason, keeping hands off their child is important.

What is that quote eating sand keeps the Dr. away or something like that? I cant remember what it is exactly?
 
#67
lara0112 said:
I understand bchleo when it comes to unwanted touching - but not on the germ basis (I am wholeheartedly European ;). I don't agree that we are too paranoid, at least here we should be more paranoid - sorry but so many children disappear nowadays that to me it is just negligent to not be worried. hey, the paedophile round the corner is most likely trying to befriend a child in the beginning (sorry for the extreme example, but being friendly when it comes to children is not on for me). I understand that when a child is in distress and might be lost etc it is important someone should help but I am still rather wary than give the benefit of the doubt when it comes to my baby.

as for germs: I don't believe in disinfection in your 'normal' living situation - my baby is all day in the garden, what would i want to disinfect anyway? health organisations are obviously a different matter. in my experience kids get mostly sick when being around other kids that have a cold or a virus etc. and how could I prevent that? (trying to as long as possible - no 'baby' care if I can avoid it).
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Well, from my post, (germwise) I was talking about some nice grandma or heck, even grandpa type person trying to be nice while I'm standing in line WITH my kids at the store or the park, etc... I'm always with my kids. Granted, if some foul, smelly, creepy guy came up to my child when he's on the swingset & I'm standing a couple feet away, THAT is a different story! Never mind the germs, that could border on pedophile~ BUT if it was a dad swinging his little girl that is swinging beside my son & says "Gimme 5 buddy" that's different too. It's a matter of situation & I'm sure parents can judge who & what they feel comfortable with, germwise & "personal space" wise.
 
#70
Danica said:
I feel this way about my dogs...if you are dirty... touche pas!! :smile:
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I feel the same way!!

Actually, I can't stand it when people reach and and touch them anyway without asking.

It bothered me so much that they now go out in public in their little doggie stroller, protected by mesh from rude hands!!:cursing: :roflmfao:
 
#71
~Fabulousity~ said:
I hate this also! I remember being at the mall when my daughter who is now 34 months was about 1 month. DH and I were at Macy's picking up a few things for her, she was in her stroller and a woman waiting in line in front of me turned around and said "oh look at the baby" now mind you I had her covered with a recieving blanket to keep people from breathing in her face. The woman lifted the blanket and put her face down to coo at my baby :wtf: I quickly pulled the stroller back and pleasently smiled at her, I think she got what I was non-verbally saying. What is wrong with people :hrmm:
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OMG :wtf: i would have flipped
 
#72
I have a question.. Why do people around you loves touching your son's hand? I don't see that common with other kids around me.. Oh well.. Well, better get some hand sanitizer handy to keep off germs away from him! :biggrin:
 
#73
The first thing that I would ask is:

Why are you touching my son??

I can't really think of a reason why a total stranger would go up and touch somebody, nonetheless a child. I don't like it when people touch me, and I try to make it clear. No clue why people do it.

If I were you, I'd keep some babywipes or hand sanataizer in your bag so that he could clean his hands when there's no water or soap around.
 
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