Why are AKC dog club women so mean?

Status
Not open for further replies.

FlapperGal

Member
Dec 11, 2011
54
0
I need some validation, and feedback. So I'm trying to get my Bichon basic Obedience training and I thought I would expand my social horizons and join a kennel club. BIG ****ING MISTAKE. This woman who is in this AKC club dissed my breeder and called her a puppy mill when she is clearly NOT. I have owned all sorts of dogs, purebred and not. I KNOW PUPPY MILLS. She went on to completely insult me, even when I politely but firmly argued with her. GOD, what is with these x **** dog club women. They make Best in Show look like a documentary, not a satire. I should have known better and now I just want to trash talk this x to anyone who will listen! ARGHHH! (Rant over)

My DH thinks that these dog club women have DSM-IV personality disorders. Lol
 
Last edited by a moderator:

boxermom

O.G.
Aug 26, 2006
27,084
591
North Carolina
I need some validation, and feedback. So I'm trying to get my Bichon basic Obedience training and I thought I would expand my social horizons and join a kennel club. BIG ****ING MISTAKE. This woman who is in this AKC club dissed my breeder and called her a puppy mill when she is clearly NOT. I have owned all sorts of dogs, purebred and not. I KNOW PUPPY MILLS. She went on to completely insult me, even when I politely but firmly argued with her. GOD, what is with these x **** dog club women. They make Best in Show look like a documentary, not a satire. I should have known better and now I just want to trash talk this x to anyone who will listen! ARGHHH! (Rant over)

My DH thinks that these dog club women have DSM-IV personality disorders. Lol
It's not exactly the same thing but once when we were traveling I called a local pet store to see if they carried the dog food we fed our dog and the store owner proceeded to tell me I was feeding my dog junk and shame on me and I didn't know anything about dogs. Geez! I wasn't looking for a lecture, just some dog food!

Not every home breeder is a puppy mill. I guess there is more than a grain of truth in *Best In Show*, one of my all-time favorite movies.
 
Last edited by a moderator:

FlapperGal

Member
Dec 11, 2011
54
0
Thank you for responding! :smile:. I was beginning to think that crickets were about to chirp because I had stepped on some toes. I think your story points up the same thing about dog breeders and so-called experts - that it becomes a silly, stupid status issue and a game of one-up manship. So sad when life is so short and it seems unnecessary and illogical to be so nasty about something that a person has a passion for. You would think that people would be happier with animals in their lives. :weird:
 

IBleedOrange

I Bleed Orange
Feb 1, 2010
623
0
I hanndled dogs in the AKC ring in high school- 'Best in Show' seemed to be more a documentary than satire. I also remember my mentor having a shirt that said "Winner's B!tch" and the back read "Losers B!tch More".

Did she give specific reasons she didn't like your breeder? It'd be nice to disprove whatever preconceived notions she has. Otherwise, you could just put her in her place and tell her that your quite happy with Spot and end the conversation. Or tell her to put a bone in it; you're there to learn.
 

Collie5

Member
Jul 25, 2012
420
2
Northern California
Thank you for responding! :smile:. I was beginning to think that crickets were about to chirp because I had stepped on some toes. I think your story points up the same thing about dog breeders and so-called experts - that it becomes a silly, stupid status issue and a game of one-up manship. So sad when life is so short and it seems unnecessary and illogical to be so nasty about something that a person has a passion for. You would think that people would be happier with animals in their lives. :weird:
Well, personally, my toes ARE a little sore from being stepped on.
Why do you think it's fair to paint ALL "AKC show" people in the same light? I have shown dogs for 23 years and been a RESPONSIBLE breeder for 13 years. I can assure you your description of show people does NOT describe me, or most of the other show people I know.
I believe there are good and bad people in EVERYTHING, and to generalize and say ALL people in a certain hobby, profession etc are bad is wrong and unfair.
I also work in a veterinary clinic. I can assure you that if I had your attitude I could paint ALL pet owners in a pretty horrifying light, due to some of the horrible things I see at work. I could easily say ALL pet owners were ignorant, neglectful idiots. BUT, I know that not all pet owners are, and I don't judge them all by the few bad ones.
So, you ran into a person who was not a nice person. I can guarantee you there are plenty of good people who are not like that person who show in "AKC" shows. I always try to make time to talk to people and be helpful, and if I don't have a nice thing to say about another breeder, I keep it to myself.
ANY time you have people in competition, be it in animal shows, car shows, ANYTHING that involves judging/competition you have people who take things too far or too seriously. The reason MOST show people and breeders do it is to try to improve the breed we love, not for status or one- upmanship.
I don't know what profession you are in, but I don't think you would appreciate it if someone in your profession exhibited bad behavior, and because of that one person's bad behavior, YOU were then judged as being a bad person also.
 

boxermom

O.G.
Aug 26, 2006
27,084
591
North Carolina
I'll add one more comment from experience with Boxers. Back when there were no breed rescues, we bought a puppy from a well-respected breeder of show Boxers. I told the owner that the puppy would be a family pet, not a show dog. The owner told me she (the pup) was *too good* to just be a pet. When no other buyer came along, she reluctantly sold her to our family. As it turned out Heidi did not grow into *show conformation* at all and never would've competed well. Sadly she died of cancer at a young age. So *experts* don't know everything all the time. None of us do.
 

Collie5

Member
Jul 25, 2012
420
2
Northern California
I'll add one more comment from experience with Boxers. Back when there were no breed rescues, we bought a puppy from a well-respected breeder of show Boxers. I told the owner that the puppy would be a family pet, not a show dog. The owner told me she (the pup) was *too good* to just be a pet. When no other buyer came along, she reluctantly sold her to our family. As it turned out Heidi did not grow into *show conformation* at all and never would've competed well. Sadly she died of cancer at a young age. So *experts* don't know everything all the time. None of us do.
I sell "Show prospect" puppies for the same price as my companion puppies (some call pet quality), just on a different contract. The reason for this is because even longtime breeders make mistakes and the puppies that look like the best show prospects at 10 weeks or 12 weeks can "go off" and end up not being show quality. (or as I've also experienced...visa versa) It has happened to me. I have sold "Show prospect" puppies to non show homes when no show homes were available. All reputable breeders want to see what they hope are their best puppies in the show ring. In reality, that is not always possible. I don't consider ANY of us "experts" as we are all constantly learning. And Mother Nature can always throw in a few suprises to even the most knowledgable, experienced breeders who have done their homework.
It is so difficult for many people to understand other people's passions in life. So many people deem something crazy, stupid, etc if they have no interest in the subject, don't understand the subject, or have no experience in the subject. They then seem to think because it's not THEIR passion, that it's okay to demean it and insult the people who ARE passionate about it. I guess it's just human nature, which is why I prefer animals to people.
So, seeing as how I can see where this thread is going, and I know I will definitely lose my temper rapidly if I stay here, I'll leave the thread to the bashers and haters. In fact this may be just the boost I need to get off TPF and delete the entire site from my computer since I seem to find so many on this forum who are either know it alls, haters, people who totally ignore posts by anyone who is not in their clique here, or the truly rude. There has only been 1 sub-forum thread in another forum where people have been friendly, welcoming and respond to my posts. Maybe I should start a thread on "Why are TPF women so mean?" But, I'd be better off to use the time to spend with my non-judgmental dogs/horses/cats.
Now MY rant is done. :storm:
 
Last edited:

SunglassLove

Troublemaker!
O.G.
Jan 26, 2009
2,615
16
Chicago
^They are just sharing their experiences...

FWIW, my mom's friend breeds and shows Huskies. He (and about 75% of everyone surrounding him that I've encountered while visiting him at shows) makes Best In Show look like a documentary. The other 25% were very friendly, knowledgable without being an in-your-face know it all, and very happy to correctly educate without shoving things down someone's throat. I was very happy to sit and chat with those people.

The rest? Nope.

I'm in the horse world... so I get it, I really do. There are bad apples and good seeds under the same roof. Unfortunately, the bad apples stick out more.
 

Collie5

Member
Jul 25, 2012
420
2
Northern California
^They are just sharing their experiences...

FWIW, my mom's friend breeds and shows Huskies. He (and about 75% of everyone surrounding him that I've encountered while visiting him at shows) makes Best In Show look like a documentary. The other 25% were very friendly, knowledgable without being an in-your-face know it all, and very happy to correctly educate without shoving things down someone's throat. I was very happy to sit and chat with those people.

The rest? Nope.

I'm in the horse world... so I get it, I really do. There are bad apples and good seeds under the same roof. Unfortunately, the bad apples stick out more.
"Sharing their experiences" is one thing, but when you start throwing everyone who is involved in AKC clubs/shows/breeders into the same "BAD" category, and calling them filthy names, (and yes, I did notice the filthy word that was originally used has now been changed to an "X") then that is another thing.
I was genuinely hurt and offended by the original post, and I think an apology to all of us who are NOT bad exhibitors, breeders etc. should be in order, but I'm not dumb enough to think that would ever happen. People who think they know everything because of one experience rarely change their minds, even when confronted by facts and logic, and they don't apologize.
As I said in my first post, after working in a veterinary clinic for over 5 years, I could DEFINITELY have the same attitude about pet owners. I could say they are ALL stupid, ignorant, negligent idiots who should not own animals. I have seen some truly horrific things done by pet owners. BUT, I know better and know there are pet owners who do not fit that description.
I agree with you that the bad apples are the ones who get the attention. It's like certain breeds of dogs get a bad rap because when they do something bad, it's all over the news, but you never hear about the good ones, or the good things the rest of their breed does.
 

SunglassLove

Troublemaker!
O.G.
Jan 26, 2009
2,615
16
Chicago
"Sharing their experiences" is one thing, but when you start throwing everyone who is involved in AKC clubs/shows/breeders into the same "BAD" category, and calling them filthy names, (and yes, I did notice the filthy word that was originally used has now been changed to an "X") then that is another thing.
I was genuinely hurt and offended by the original post, and I think an apology to all of us who are NOT bad exhibitors, breeders etc. should be in order, but I'm not dumb enough to think that would ever happen. People who think they know everything because of one experience rarely change their minds, even when confronted by facts and logic, and they don't apologize.
As I said in my first post, after working in a veterinary clinic for over 5 years, I could DEFINITELY have the same attitude about pet owners. I could say they are ALL stupid, ignorant, negligent idiots who should not own animals. I have seen some truly horrific things done by pet owners. BUT, I know better and know there are pet owners who do not fit that description.
I agree with you that the bad apples are the ones who get the attention. It's like certain breeds of dogs get a bad rap because when they do something bad, it's all over the news, but you never hear about the good ones, or the good things the rest of their breed does.
I admit I missed the X'd out parts... and if my mind is filling in the blanks correctly, I can see why you are offended and hurt... namecalling (even in a rant) just sucks when it pertains to something you're passionate about.
 

Collie5

Member
Jul 25, 2012
420
2
Northern California
I admit I missed the X'd out parts... and if my mind is filling in the blanks correctly, I can see why you are offended and hurt... namecalling (even in a rant) just sucks when it pertains to something you're passionate about.
Yes, the original word used which is now an "X" was the C**t (fill in the "un" between the C and T) I was extremely offended. I am passionate about showing, my breed of choice, and breeding (which I try to be responsible to the highest degree), and for someone to go that far made me very angry, and I'm usually pretty mellow and easy to get along with (and hopefully reasonable) I love talking to new people about showing, breeds and breeding and to educate people in a nice way.
I have been to plenty of horse shows in my life too, and so I know all about politics and the bad apples in all types of competition. I have horses (one ex show horse) and many friends who show horses.
You can't escape the bad apples, but you can try to let people see that we are not ALL bad, and hopefully make a better impression that will stick with people.
 

boxermom

O.G.
Aug 26, 2006
27,084
591
North Carolina
Yes, the original word used which is now an "X" was the C**t (fill in the "un" between the C and T) I was extremely offended. I am passionate about showing, my breed of choice, and breeding (which I try to be responsible to the highest degree), and for someone to go that far made me very angry, and I'm usually pretty mellow and easy to get along with (and hopefully reasonable) I love talking to new people about showing, breeds and breeding and to educate people in a nice way.
I have been to plenty of horse shows in my life too, and so I know all about politics and the bad apples in all types of competition. I have horses (one ex show horse) and many friends who show horses.
You can't escape the bad apples, but you can try to let people see that we are not ALL bad, and hopefully make a better impression that will stick with people.
Collie, I would be offended too at the name-calling. There is no place for that in PF. I appreciate that you share your vast experience in a vet clinic and as a breeder of AKC dogs. I hope you aren't including me in the group of people who stick to a clique.

I just wanted to share a couple of things that have happened to us over the years, not intending to slam any breeders or those who show dogs. My parents raised AKC Boxers bred from a Best in Show dog( from Maisy Lane Kennels in Milwaukee in the 1940's and 1950's) at Westminster so I am the last person to criticize the passion show dog people have.

I apologize for generalizing. I should know better. And I thank you for explaining how a breeder handles the show puppy litter sales.
 

madamefifi

cat hoarder
O.G.
Aug 23, 2006
5,813
737
virginia
I need some validation, and feedback. So I'm trying to get my Bichon basic Obedience training and I thought I would expand my social horizons and join a kennel club. BIG ****ING MISTAKE. This woman who is in this AKC club dissed my breeder and called her a puppy mill when she is clearly NOT. I have owned all sorts of dogs, purebred and not. I KNOW PUPPY MILLS. She went on to completely insult me, even when I politely but firmly argued with her. GOD, what is with these x **** dog club women. They make Best in Show look like a documentary, not a satire. I should have known better and now I just want to trash talk this x to anyone who will listen! ARGHHH! (Rant over)

My DH thinks that these dog club women have DSM-IV personality disorders. Lol
Wait, so you are painting all AKC members with the same nasty brush because ONE of them was mean to you? Kind of harsh, no? I could easily do the same to you--all Bichon owners are foul-mouthed and easily offended. But that would hardly be fair or accurate, would it?

You met an unpleasant woman who put your back up--that's life. For every mean-spirited dog owner there are approximately a million who love animals and would me happy to share their love and expertise with you, regardless of where you got your puppy.

I joined a horse owners forum a while back and have been shocked and intimidated by the way some members there jump all over the most innocent post and seemingly do their best to make the OP feel like an incompetent idiot. But I would NEVER say that all horse owners are a-holes. For one thing, I am a horse owner myself, and I don't *think* I am an a-hole. For another, the intent always seems to be looking out for the best interest of the horses, no matter how poorly-worded the responses may be, and there is a lot of knowledge to be gained if one can look past the unavoidable know-it- alls.

Find another kennel club, or join that one and hold your head up. Don't let that one woman make you feel upset about your puppy's origins, you know the breeder and have nothing to feel ashamed or defensive about.
 

JetSetGo!

Never not trying
Admin
Authenticator
O.G.
Feb 6, 2008
25,360
787
valley girl x city girl
Let's be clear, we cannot fairly make such sweeping judgments about any group of people – at least not without offending others.

Please speak of your experience specifically with certain people – and for fairness sake not determine that all of any group are any certain way.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.