What's up with "Mom Bags?"

Masteryoda

Member
Jul 12, 2012
1,848
3
Illinois
Alrighty...I used my coupon today and got a gathered Carrie in black. Really sharp bag! It was my "must have" bag. Why would i choose any other bag than the one i "must have," other than cost?

Then... I got to thinking about a conversation that I overheard the other day at TjMaxx. 2 women were looking at MK purses and discussing loudly why certain ones just wouldn't work for them. They oohed and ahhed over some but then stated how impractical those choices would be. The main reason? Kids. Funny thing was, the kids they had with them were at least 5 and out of diapers...so they werent buying a diaper bag. These ladies were in fact, passing up every single stylish bag and going for the ugliest or most plain. The "most practical," I heard them say. I even saw on a thread here where people were discussing the exact same thing. If its about cost or afraid of a bag getting ruined, why look at bags over $100? It's about soccer mom style I believe.

I myself have one child that is 2 years old. I have a Vera Bradley diaper bag for her stuff that works great. I have my own purse though that I use. I might throw a small toy or two into it or a barrette but it's my bag for my stuff as a general rule.

I love to see other stylish moms out there that have broken out of the mom jean stereotype willingly!!! It is now my belief that moms everywhere actually embrace the geeky soccer mom look. Maybe the fact is that they were nerdy all along and now they have an excuse so they can stop trying so hard. Idk but I found the whole conversation to be sickening. Let me look at my bags in peace ladies! Shut up about mom bags! Lol!!
 

TooManyWantMore

LV Content
Dec 11, 2012
12,332
23
Alrighty...I used my coupon today and got a gathered Carrie in black. Really sharp bag! It was my "must have" bag. Why would i choose any other bag than the one i "must have," other than cost?

Then... I got to thinking about a conversation that I overheard the other day at TjMaxx. 2 women were looking at MK purses and discussing loudly why certain ones just wouldn't work for them. They oohed and ahhed over some but then stated how impractical those choices would be. The main reason? Kids. Funny thing was, the kids they had with them were at least 5 and out of diapers...so they werent buying a diaper bag. These ladies were in fact, passing up every single stylish bag and going for the ugliest or most plain. The "most practical," I heard them say. I even saw on a thread here where people were discussing the exact same thing. If its about cost or afraid of a bag getting ruined, why look at bags over $100? It's about soccer mom style I believe.

I myself have one child that is 2 years old. I have a Vera Bradley diaper bag for her stuff that works great. I have my own purse though that I use. I might throw a small toy or two into it or a barrette but it's my bag for my stuff as a general rule.

I love to see other stylish moms out there that have broken out of the mom jean stereotype willingly!!! It is now my belief that moms everywhere actually embrace the geeky soccer mom look. Maybe the fact is that they were nerdy all along and now they have an excuse so they can stop trying so hard. Idk but I found the whole conversation to be sickening. Let me look at my bags in peace ladies! Shut up about mom bags! Lol!!
LOL. I agree. Some women (I've been guilty a time or 20) use the 'I have kids' excuse on days that you just don't feel like it. I think the conversation was pretty rude to have in public. But hey, if it made them feel better...
Oh, and congrats on an awesome bag! I'll bet it's beautiful!
 

Shoebaglady

~Totes & Pockets~
Oct 5, 2011
5,643
157
~Canada~
I think things like style, affordability, & practicality are subjective. What was wrong with what they were discussing?

I'm am a SAHM. As for Mom bags and soccer mom style, I have bags that I prefer to use when with my children. Practicality for me includes being hands free and large enough to hold extra items. Affordability....my most comfortable "mom bag" is a $1100 LV. I think some women pull off the soccer mom look beautifully. Mom style is comfort for the individual. I aim to be stylish every day as I'm sure most women do regardless of their line of work.

As for your gathered Carrie......:love: That is a beautiful bag !
 

TooManyWantMore

LV Content
Dec 11, 2012
12,332
23
I buy my bags for me, not for my children. I have one that's 8 and the other is 2. I do put my youngest son's things in my bag but that's usually for short trips. I plan to have my bags until they are falling apart, which I hope is after my youngest doesn't need extra stuff. If I was looking at a bag and other mothers were talking about how impractical that bag was for a mother, I wouldn't appreciate that. It would make me feel uncomfortable. So if I were out with a friend shopping for a bag, I wouldn't say that loud enough that anyone else could hear.
 

Mom2jtv

Coach Lover
Nov 27, 2012
962
3
Washington State
There are lots of different kinds of moms, and we all have our own styles. Not one kind is right or wrong, IMO. If two friends want to discuss their ideas of practicality while shopping, more power to them, especially if it's a conversation overheard and not something they are judging you about. You said yourself they were saying why the bags wouldn't be right for THEM.

You found the conversation "sickening"? That's a little harsh and judgmental.
 

Ktsmomi

Member
Jan 17, 2013
108
0
I agree with the poster. Yet everyone has their own opinion which is what makes us all individuals :smile: however, it's MY personal peeve when women have kids then feel like they CAN'T have a fab bag or make comments that if you don't want to be a selfish mommy you HAVE to give up the expensive bags, salon hair, nails, etc. I LOVE my munchkin, but I don't feel selfish for still doing all of these things, and no one should try and make moms who do them feel bad. Just like moms who do think like that aren't wrong for the way they feel. It's just personal choice. :smile:
 

Britexmom

Britexmom
Jul 20, 2012
886
1
San Antonio, TX
There are lots of different kinds of moms, and we all have our own styles. Not one kind is right or wrong, IMO. If two friends want to discuss their ideas of practicality while shopping, more power to them, especially if it's a conversation overheard and not something they are judging you about. You said yourself they were saying why the bags wouldn't be right for THEM.

You found the conversation "sickening"? That's a little harsh and judgmental.
Exactly this.....what is sickening about someone knowing what will or won't work for their life :P personally even tho my kids are older and I don't carry their stuff I do still want my purses to be practical for the lifestyle I have.......lots of basketball games, track meets, swim meets. It doesn't mean I can't be stylish but I do have to take into account where I use my bags.....I don't have time to baby a delicate bag because I want to enjoy the events I go to not sit and coddle my purse the whole time :cool:
 
Dec 1, 2008
3,304
116
That's so funny! These kinds of conversations and perceptions are one of the main reasons motherhood hasn't appealed to my friends or myself for a very long time (among other reasons). We're only now reaching the age where people are thinking about kids, and while I do plan to have a family (in near future, in fact), the fact that the word "Mom" is sometimes synonymous with basically being stripped of hip/cool/sexy style makes me pause. These perceptions have been reinforced by those kinds of public, sometimes very-loud "mom" conversations... where even if you don't want to listen, you can't help overhearing because it's two Moms talking at a thunderous volume. Think the SNL skit featuring Kristin Wig and Tina Fey about Mom Jeans ("Because you want jeans that say, 'I'm not a woman. I'm a mom.'"). The fact that this skit exists and was funny to millions of Americans suggests that there is more to the "Mom" perception than just the opinions/judgements of one or two people.

That said, I can think of tons of moms who are the opposite of the "Mom jeans" skit. I know a lot of very cool, stylish moms. Moms who don't wear "mom jeans," or carry hideous handbags. It is this group I would like to join.... I mean, comfort is important. Practicality is important. Being an excellent mother is important (most important, in fact). But does it have to be unattractive or frumpy? Hells to the no. I think that if style or fashion weren't important to you before you had a kid, it probably won't be important afterwards.

I certainly don't plan to sacrifice my personal style on the alter of motherhood. Maybe I'll feel differently after I have a child, but I highly doubt it. If you just picked up a gathered Carrie, I imagine you must feel the same. Congrats on a gorgeous new bag! If I saw you go by with your toddler and a Carrie on your arm, I would think "Now there's a stylish Mom." :drinkup:
 
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soccergirly87

Member
Apr 27, 2008
1,751
96
I don't think that's quite an issue in the DC area, especially the wealthy suburbs like McLean and Potomac - Chanel and LV abound for moms who look like models! :P
 

jentilla

Member
Aug 30, 2012
136
2
Maryville, TN
Maybe I am just too old, half of my kids are in college or grown, to really care what kind of bags other people tote around. Or discuss with their friends for that matter. I carry what I like. If I want a "mom" bag because I like it for WHATEVER reason then that's what I will tote. Everyone has a right to their own style and opinions. If fashion is important to you great, but to a mom with little ones running around having a bag, jeans, etc that fits that lifestyle might be more important. ( let's be honest, you just can't nurse a baby easily in a Victoria Secrets bra...) I for one still don't use bags that won't go comfortably over my shoulder. I am always on the run and this is important to me.

As for the "sickening" or "rude" conversation, believe me I have heard many worse things being discussed in public. Talking about "mom" bags just isn't one of them.
 

paula3boys

O.G.
Sep 16, 2008
14,029
10,380
my house
I carried mom bags when each of my boys were babies because it was before I was interested in bags. I used to have fossil leather purses but went to diaper bags when I had extra baby stuff to carry. I went back to leather when I didn't have extra stuff to carry anymore or going out mom only
 

soccergirly87

Member
Apr 27, 2008
1,751
96
jentilla said:
Maybe I am just too old, half of my kids are in college or grown, to really care what kind of bags other people tote around. Or discuss with their friends for that matter. I carry what I like. If I want a "mom" bag because I like it for WHATEVER reason then that's what I will tote. Everyone has a right to their own style and opinions. If fashion is important to you great, but to a mom with little ones running around having a bag, jeans, etc that fits that lifestyle might be more important. ( let's be honest, you just can't nurse a baby easily in a Victoria Secrets bra...) I for one still don't use bags that won't go comfortably over my shoulder. I am always on the run and this is important to me.

As for the "sickening" or "rude" conversation, believe me I have heard many worse things being discussed in public. Talking about "mom" bags just isn't one of them.
I agree, I don't care what others carry, I'm too old!
 

MrsB1227

Member
Dec 21, 2012
92
0
Westchester County, NY
Hi all, new around here and just wanted to comment in this as a mom of two young ones (2yo and 4 mo). I have found myself also not getting certain purses because they weren't practical for my needs. When out with my kids I do need more space for sippy cups, bibs, diapers, etc.

As far as the non-stylish mom thing goes, just wanted to add that many times it is not that these women choose to "let themselves go" but it can simply be impossible to give your looks as much attention as before. (Unless you have the luxury of a nanny). I never wore ponytails before kids, and now, well more often than not that is my hairstyle! Shopping for trendy clothes for myself? Who has the time? I'm lucky if I get a shower every day! (Sorry to scare you younger ladies without kids but when you have a clingy baby who cries when you are not in sight, this is reality!) These days it's more about "will i be able to easily nurse my son in that shirt?". Just saying, having kids, especially little ones is tough, your priorities change and if it's between looking pretty or giving attention to your kids, the kids should win.

With all that said, when these little guys are older and more self sufficient I plan to go back to all my fabulousness! But for now, comfort and practicality will ***** style.
 
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zaara10

Member
Dec 7, 2011
5,606
36
tpf
I'm a little confused here... What is "sickening" about a conversation between 2 mom friends about their personal taste over handbags? They obviously know what works for them & their lifestyle, so why the judgement?
I'm a mom to a 2 yr old & a 5 yr old; I've got my super fab days, sort of fab days & not so fab days. It's all part of motherhood. I accept that & completely embrace it.
What I think is "sickening" though is that there are people out there, especially other moms, who are there to judge me & be "mean girls" instead of just being supportive, understanding, or just minding their own business. Be a fabulously sexy hot mom for all I care, just don't expect everyone else to be too. You don't walk in their shoes (or for that matter, wear their purses).
Sorry for my thoughts, but there it is.
 
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jentilla

Member
Aug 30, 2012
136
2
Maryville, TN
I'm a little confused here... What is "sickening" about a conversation between 2 mom friends about their personal taste over handbags? They obviously know what works for them & their lifestyle, so why the judgement?
I'm a mom to a 2 yr old & a 5 yr old; I've got my super fab days, sort of fab days & not so fab days. It's all part of motherhood. I accept that & completely embrace it.
What I think is "sickening" though is that there are people out there, especially other moms, who are there to judge me & be "mean girls" instead of just being supportive or just minding their own business. Be a fabulously sexy hot mom for all I care, just don't expect everyone else to be too. You don't walk in their shoes (or for that matter, wear their purses).
Sorry for my thoughts, but there it is.
Yep, well said..... amen!