This is meant in the spirit of fun, but what stereotypes and assumptions do you have for the clients and style identities of certain brands? Obviously, serious answers would be nuanced and complicated. I’m curious about the jokingly general perceptions we have. I've shopped with most of these so I'm mocking myself as much as anyone else 
Try to focus on where the brands are today and/or where they've been in the past five years or so.
For me:
Valentino – romantic, frou-frous girls. "I'm offbeat, quirky, and cute! My outfits are not all the same."
Chloe – bohemian sister of Valentino; the “peasant style” for people who aren't peasants. "I live a pure and free life...in my very expesive clothes."
Saint Laurent – rocker 1980s/90s chic (or kitsch extraordinaire) for people who like their basics on the edge. "My jeans are just so much more."
Balmain – less is not more, tighter is better, and slits are my friend. "I have a bazillion followers and am super sexy!"
Chanel – young noveau riche or old-money old ladies who want to be obvious about what they wear. "It's Chanel. I'm classy."
D&G – glam that sometimes meets trashy; aka, the Fabulously Gaudy. "I love animal and floral prints! See-through is also nice, as are corsets. Is it kind of tacky? Maybe. But you know it's awesome."
Alexander Wang – urbanite who pays a lot of money to be casual and a member of the in-crowd. "I don't care about fashion...except I do."
Ralph Lauren – Town and Country. "I'm not traditional and boring. I'm classic."
Burberry – Town and Country except I think I’m cooler. "We get the best models. Plus the trench is iconic!"
Alexander McQueen – there are two types: 1) "I miss Lee!" or 2) "Sarah is so romantic (but not like Valentino - this is McQueen after all). We have ruffles (but not like Chloe)! We're edgy and fierce (but not like Saint Laurent; Sarah is a dreamer). Our prints and patterns are better than anyone else's."
Dior – ultra feminine sophisticates who've been having an identiy crisis for the past five years. "Dior today is well, I don't know. But I know what it should be. I miss [insert whoever you like as long as it's not the current designer]."
Gucci – crazy-disco-hippies. "The 1970s were the best decade. You just don't understand the brilliance."
Hermes – status. "I have a Birkin/Kelly." Or: "I'm wearing something that's not a Birkin/Kelly and I feel superior because I'm not flaunting my Hermes fabulousness. I buy for the craftsmanship people."
Try to focus on where the brands are today and/or where they've been in the past five years or so.For me:
Valentino – romantic, frou-frous girls. "I'm offbeat, quirky, and cute! My outfits are not all the same."
Chloe – bohemian sister of Valentino; the “peasant style” for people who aren't peasants. "I live a pure and free life...in my very expesive clothes."
Saint Laurent – rocker 1980s/90s chic (or kitsch extraordinaire) for people who like their basics on the edge. "My jeans are just so much more."
Balmain – less is not more, tighter is better, and slits are my friend. "I have a bazillion followers and am super sexy!"
Chanel – young noveau riche or old-money old ladies who want to be obvious about what they wear. "It's Chanel. I'm classy."
D&G – glam that sometimes meets trashy; aka, the Fabulously Gaudy. "I love animal and floral prints! See-through is also nice, as are corsets. Is it kind of tacky? Maybe. But you know it's awesome."
Alexander Wang – urbanite who pays a lot of money to be casual and a member of the in-crowd. "I don't care about fashion...except I do."
Ralph Lauren – Town and Country. "I'm not traditional and boring. I'm classic."
Burberry – Town and Country except I think I’m cooler. "We get the best models. Plus the trench is iconic!"
Alexander McQueen – there are two types: 1) "I miss Lee!" or 2) "Sarah is so romantic (but not like Valentino - this is McQueen after all). We have ruffles (but not like Chloe)! We're edgy and fierce (but not like Saint Laurent; Sarah is a dreamer). Our prints and patterns are better than anyone else's."
Dior – ultra feminine sophisticates who've been having an identiy crisis for the past five years. "Dior today is well, I don't know. But I know what it should be. I miss [insert whoever you like as long as it's not the current designer]."
Gucci – crazy-disco-hippies. "The 1970s were the best decade. You just don't understand the brilliance."
Hermes – status. "I have a Birkin/Kelly." Or: "I'm wearing something that's not a Birkin/Kelly and I feel superior because I'm not flaunting my Hermes fabulousness. I buy for the craftsmanship people."
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